Does masculinity do anything for you?

Autistic_Reeeeeeeeee · 2018-11-09T06:17:00+00:00

Being feminine as a female is simply more attractive. You are more likeable, Men can get on with you better.

Being Masculine as a male is simply more attractive, You are more likeable, Women can get on with you better.

This is why people tell you to act masculine or feminine. Simply to make social situations easier for you and them. If we played our predictable roles in society well, The navigation and difficulty of engaging conversation would be easier for both sexes and people would get more out of their interactions.

If someone tells or asks you to do something. Assume it is to make life easier for them unless logic dictates otherwise.

And to answer your questions. Masculinity does everything for men. It is the key indicator for success. You have to give many things up. But what you gain pays for itself tenfold. Some people are just content or lazy and can't be bothered making the change.

starseedlove · 2018-11-09T05:41:44+00:00

When people tell you that you should be more feminine, they probably mean have some empathy and compassion, listen rather than lecture, etc. It's also the "right brain" which has to do with creativity and intuition, which balances out a rigid logical/reason based worldview. Think about it, the yin/yang work together to create a balance.

Many men view masculinity as strong and feminine as weak and that makes it hard to accept any feminine energy within ourselves. If you can allow yourself to be vulnerable and have compassion for your weaknesses, that will soften you some and allow others to feel safe and get close to you.

You could also see it as dominant and submissive stances. Someone who is dominant all the time probably craves letting go of control (being submissive) but doesn't feel like it's acceptable.

Your post suggests that by allowing more of your natural feminine energy to surface, you will have to give something up, suppress your views, or work on your appearance. It doesn't have to be that way.

However, if you're happy and content with the way you are, you don't have to listen to them.

the_calibre_cat · 2018-11-09T06:03:27+00:00

Gives me some guidance as to how to be, and seems like a pretty good fit for me. I mean, if it was totally up to me, I probably wouldn't be your stereotypical dude. I wouldn't be in drag all day, but I wouldn't be super masculine. I'm not now, and I'm fairly certain it costs me female attention, I'm just not really interested in mutilating my genitals and whatever else you need to rearrange to get attention in 2018.

Eastuss · 2018-11-09T08:41:11+00:00

Men have the choice to be either masculine either alone. The fact you think it as a choice is very telling of how lenient men are with unfeminine women.

Unmasculine men aspire to a balanced relationship based on equal expectations and mutual support, but it simply doesn't exist for men.

-OpportunityCost · 2018-11-09T08:55:02+00:00

Yes I can so without a doubt that doing masculine things (such as lifting and being more assertive) has helped my life in dating and in general. As far as you giving up more to be more feminine it all depends on what you want. If you want more attention from males interested in relationships then yes it may require you to be more feminine. If you are happy with how your life is going regardless of relationships then fuck what everyone else has to say. Just know that relationships require compromise and most men want a women who fits the standard feminine role.

gasparddelanuit · 2018-11-09T10:19:27+00:00

Yes, masculinity gets men more respect, more self-respect, more resilience, more opportunity, more women, more sex, more options, more freedom, more fulfilment and ultimately more happiness. In the vast majority of cases, it significantly improves the quality of a man's life.

Belugoid · 2018-11-09T12:10:08+00:00

All masculinity does is ruin my life. Despite holding very progressive and feminist views I have internalized a very traditional view of masculinity from a very young age and I basically always feel like I fall short. So all masculinity does is make me feel like I'm not good enough.

CainPrice · 2018-11-09T05:14:56+00:00

Similar things to women. Being masculine requires being "on" most of the time, just in a different masculine way. Just like being feminine for a woman requires being "on" in a feminine way.

But other than that, I don't think being masculine (or being feminine) is that difficult or involves giving up anything serious unless a person was raised wrong.

If you're a loser feminine man who's reached age 30 and never learned how to be masculine, and now people tell you that you have to be masculine to attract women, you're going to think that's an impossible task and seriously unfair and wonder why you can't just be yourself.

If you've been a mostly masculine guy for most of your life due to a more conventional upbringing, being masculine isn't some huge chore or an act you're putting on. It's just who you are.

I think it's probably the same for girls. If you grew up feminine, you enjoy being feminine and it's not some huge sacrifice.

Mr_White119811 · 2018-11-09T06:51:38+00:00

So that begs the question, does masculinity do anything for men?

Well I was in the Army for 9 years. That involved changing a lot of my ways so that they become more traditionally masculine.

All in all, people have more respect for me now. People listen. People pay attentiom. I have more confidence. Women dig me more.

Do men have to give anything up?

I would not say I had to give anything up. Sure I got rid of some habits and traits that did nothing for me. But what I gained was better than anything I lost.

Also, I have found the more masculine I am, and in interactions with women, where I view it as man-woman interaction, not too equals, the more the omans femininity polarises. The same woman will then speak to a less masculine guy and treat him like shit. As he does not take the masculine role, the woman will.

VermiciousKnidzz · 2018-11-10T14:56:24+00:00

masculinity is just a socially constructed aesthetic that changes with time but revolving around being physically strong. even then, men can easily be seen as very attractive without being very masculine.

honestly i think masculinity is like makeup for women. its something men strive for to better their social placement, but in the end is mostly only noticed by other guys.

also, everyone seems to have their own definition of "masculinity" which is interesting to me. its also interesting tome that "masculine" generally includes traits of success that can also apply to women, such as confidence, calmness, and sexual aggression.

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exit_sandman · 2018-11-09T08:34:02+00:00

It helps me getting women and also getting along with guys. I think that should be enough.

Barely-moral · 2018-11-09T09:23:51+00:00

Being masculine is the only option I have to achieve the kind of life that I want to have.

It does provide benefits. It passes a cost - benefit analysis.

It costs me time and the suppression of a significant ammount of feelings and moods. But at the end of the day, I get a good life in return. I get to have people in my life that enjoy my company. Not being masculine would be worst.

Femininity has benefits, just neither in proportion to the effort needed to maintain it nor the lack of options that achieve the same result.

May I ask you why? Can you elaborate? I find that being masculine if you are a man or being femenine if you are a woman is pretty much the only realistic option people have to get the benefits that come with comforming to gender roles. So I see no option for people that value those benefits.

CatchPhraze · 2018-11-09T10:03:24+00:00

This depends on what you consider femininity obviously. Do you consider it things women are more likely to do then men, like visit the doctor for yearly checkups? Eat less red meat? Then yes. Picking up feminine habbits is good for you.

Or do you mean in a classical sense like being polite to everyone, learning to sew and walking in heels? Not sure those would help. Besides the sewing, everyone should know how to sew a basic stitch.

HostileErectile · 2018-11-09T10:09:52+00:00

It's very nuanced. For me I don't think I would gain anything being more feminine. I think I have found a good balance between my masculinity and femininity.

But if you're overly macho, then sure, you might just gain something from viewing stuff from another perspective.

Speaking of genders and attraction: then a feminine woman is ofourse much more attractive. And a masculine man is more attractive than the opposite..: at least if we generalize.

reluctantly_red · 2018-11-09T10:20:18+00:00

I'm talking about the amount of effort

Its not really an effort thing. Its who you are (or aren't). A guy is either masculine or he's not. Its a pretty immutable core personality trait that has a lot to do with testosterone exposure during key developmental periods.

A guy's basic level of masculinity can be accentuated or repressed by his upbringing and by later conscious decisions. However, his core level of masculinity doesn't really change.

Nobodykers · 2018-11-09T11:41:33+00:00

Being muscular makes you more confident and outspoken. Being feminine gives confidence and a pussypass.

ExtensionComplexion · 2018-11-09T12:59:12+00:00

Masculinity does nothing for me, although it depends on what you mean by masculinity as there will be people accusing me of being unmasculine (which may well be true).

It really is useless in 2018. Jobs these days require technical skills, people skills, bullshitting skills or being good with your hands (trades). Not masculinity.

Women aren't even really attracted to masculine men. Masculine men are out of fashion, plus I think the birth control pill is making women want more feminine men.

Ultimately in today's "gender is a social construct" world; do whatever you want. Wanna wear a dress, wear a dress. Wanna cry at work, cry at work. You may even attract more women by being a girly man, good ol synthetic estrogen.

AFuzzyMuffin · 2018-11-09T14:12:53+00:00

Absolutely broken as fuck. I agree with you femininity is more for the sake of women fighting against other women I think. As far as I go I don’t personally care about any of that stuff. I have a fresh eyes approach where if a girl dresses up ALL the time it’s takes away from those really nice occasions where she should dress up. I don’t hate it I just think it ends up being counter productive sometimes. Masculinity? Only positives imo. Attracts women, attracts a positive life etc as LONG as you are not toxic with it.

decoy88 · 2018-11-09T16:11:57+00:00

Nahh! I just do what I want.

daveofmars · 2018-11-10T16:18:32+00:00

Wanting to be more masculine has forced me to work out, eat better, get more sleep, and take care of the responsibilities around me, and by doing so has made my life better. I like working out. I like seeing at my abs come in. I feel like I can take on anything and endure the worst life has to throw at me. Plus, shooting guns is fun.

Title	Does masculinity do anything for you?
Author	Eartherry
Upvotes	2
Comments	69
Date	November 9, 2018 5:05 AM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/9vhn62/does_masculinity_do_anything_for_you/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/does-masculinity-do-anything-for-you.259141 https://theredarchive.com/post/259141

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