Being yourself perhaps would be better dating advice if people instead said to stay true to yourself. It doesn't mean you can't change your behavior, as people can naturally change throughout their lifetime, but not fabricating authenticity in order to appeal to others is a good idea. Rather if change is going to happen, its not going to be planned, like how you probably differ from how you were when you were a teenager. A series of studies by Lawrence Josephs, PhD and others sheds some light on the forever conflicting suggestions of "just be yourself" and "maintain frame/play hard to get".

Study 1 shows that individuals that are high in authenticity have good long-term relationship outcomes in comparison to individuals that play hard to get and are high on the Dark Triad traits of narcissism, Machiavellianism, and psychopathy. In addition, authenticity is associated with emotional intelligence

So this doesn't approve or disapprove the notion that the latter strategy is effective for STR/ONS but for LTR's it is not a good strategy. Not too surprising considering most people cannot spend their whole lives as chameleons due to the internal conflict and suppressed feelings they might experience.

Study 2 shows that individuals high on authenticity engage in specific behaviors when engaged in serious dating and serious long-term relationships. They display emotional openness, transparency, and availability in engaging in behaviors like showing their interest and feelings and introducing their partners to their families. Individuals that engage in such “be yourself” dating behavior are not only high in authenticity but high in secure attachment while low in narcissism.

The correlation between being an authentic person and displaying the qualities fundamental to a successful startup and maintenance of an LTR seems apparent.

Study 3 demonstrated that in a dating context, individuals that engage in “be yourself” dating behavior are more attractive than individuals that play hard to get. In addition, there is assortative mating (i.e. birds of a feather flock together) when it comes to “be yourself” dating behavior. Males high on Dark Triad traits are more attracted to game-playing females while males high on authenticity possess a special antipathy towards game-playing females. Playing hard to get might work in attracting potential romantic partners. Yet it might not always attract the type of romantic partners that would make good candidates for successful long-term relationships. In contrast being yourself attracts the type of individuals that tend to have successful long-term relationships.

Play stupid games win stupid prizes. What you putout is what you attract most likely.

Study 4 demonstrated that when people are made to feel that it is unsafe to be oneself individuals become more likely to play hard to get by taking their time returning a text and setting up a date. Yet when individuals are made to feel it is safe to be oneself, they are more likely to engage in “be yourself” dating behavior that shows interest and availability by returning a text and setting up a date more quickly. This effect is more pronounced among rejection sensitive individuals who are reluctant to engage in “be yourself” dating behavior when made to feel it is unsafe to express their true selves.

I've heard plenty of people on the internet talk about how long you should wait before replying to a text ("the magical sweet spot dude, wait at least 1 hour, and if it's important, at least 4 hours") and it just sounds like more stupid games for stupid prizes.

The results of these four studies together provide significant evidence that being yourself may be an effective mating strategy for those seeking successful long-term relationships.

While it isn't easy to be genuine most of the time, I would say the risk is well worth the reward. Quantity probably will go down but quality, I feel, will surely go up. That mask could slip sooner or later, or you might grow tired of always pretending or continuing a facade. If you are going to change how you currently are it has to be a true change. You'll know if it is or not.

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Curious to see what you all think about this, and your takeaways.

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Here's the article in case you want a full read: https://www.psychologytoday.com/au/blog/between-the-sheets/201903/why-authenticity-is-the-best-dating-strategy

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