"I Love You"

MyRPWAccount · 2016-09-05T19:52:51+00:00

My husband said it first.

...In his sleep, after a few beers, while he was half-smothering me. I was trying to get up so I could use the bathroom, but he grabbed me into a hug and said, "Don't go. Love you."

I teased him about it that morning. A few weeks later, we found out I was pregnant, and he called me up and said, "We can do this. I love you. I really do." Ladies & gentlelurkers, I cried.

Now, his sleep conversations are about fast food products. :P

tradmarriageftw · 2016-09-05T19:35:46+00:00

My husband was my first boyfriend so I was reallllly inexperienced. We had been together for a of couple weeks and then it was valentines day. He found a record store that had a rare record I was talking about and blew me away. The next day I shyly said "Do you think you might love me?" and he said "Actually, yeah, but I thought it might be too soon to say it." and I was like "Me too."

stevierose345 · 2016-09-06T01:19:52+00:00

He said it first. It was early August. I was nineteen and he was twenty two and we had only been seeing each other for two months. My parents hated him and forbade me to see him, so we had to sneak around. I was going away to college that fall after spending my first year at a branch at home. My parents were threatening to keep me at home for another year if I continued to see him. I wanted to go away to college more than anything in the world at that point in my life, but I also was completely infatuated with this gorgeous, dangerous boy who gave me a glimpse of another life. He had no choice but to let me go and I went away to college for the next three years. He let me go, but he did not let go of me. He drove an hour most Friday nights to pick me up, take me to dinner, and then take me back to his place until Monday morning when we would get up before dawn to make the return trip to campus before he would have to show up for work and I would show up for class. There were other weekends he would stay with me on campus. Over the course of these three years my parents came to accept our relationship, realize why I was in love with my boyfriend, and see him for the good man he was. We married one year after I graduated from college. I think that one of the fundamental strengths I saw in him and made me believe that we had a future together was his unwavering conviction that we belonged together. He loved me enough to give me the freedom I needed, but at the same time never let me think I was free from him. He wanted me in his life and he made it clear. Does this mean I could not walk away from him if it was my choice? Absolutely not. In fact I did end the relationship at one point because I wanted to follow my dreams and that meant moving to a big city to further my career in the major I had worked so hard to achieve. This break-up only lasted for three weeks. He showed up with a six pack of beer and his heart on his sleeve and I was putty in his hands after the first hour of conversation. I never looked back. I have used my education to achieve other ambitions, ones that fit into the lifestyle I chose when I agreed to spend my life with this wonderful man who is still my man today.

Sunhappy_DC · 2016-09-05T17:48:08+00:00

In all my past relationships, I've always said it first. But now I'm way more guarded. I think it would take a LOT for me to say "I love you" to a man first.

jade_cat · 2016-09-06T03:24:45+00:00

We were at the airport. I was leaving for a two-week trip, he drove me to the airport. We hugged, and kissed, and hugged again, and then he said softly in my ear "I love you".

...and me, like an idiot, I thought I didn't hear well, so I said "Huh?"

So he said it again, "I love you". And I told him "I love you too". And we kissed and hugged again. And then I had to leave.

Those were the longest two weeks of my life.

littleeggwyf · 2016-09-06T05:49:10+00:00

He said it first, after our first proper kiss (3 weeks dating). I was going on holiday for a week with family the next week and wanted to stake my claim properly, so it was a relief he responded strongly!

He was nervous to check my reaction was good, but then grinned and kissed me again

CoochQuarantine · 2016-09-05T18:52:35+00:00

I don't think I've ever said it first. But if I'm honest it's cause I was super manipulative and sort of forced it with guys. With this relationship we kinda said it together cause we knew through other words what we felt. So while technically he said it first I broached the subject first. It was about a month in.

Kittenkajira · 2016-09-05T19:39:28+00:00

I said it first, and had knew for a few weeks. It was around 6-8 weeks of dating, and we had been spending a ton of time together. I've learned since then that he thought I picked the most awkward time to say it the first time (during sex). My husband doesn't think he would have ever said it first - everything he's been told or read says to wait for the girl to say it first. Most RPW say you should wait for the man to say it first.

frozen_strawberry · 2016-09-05T20:15:46+00:00

L said it first. It was after about 6 weeks of dating and he was with his buddies drinking when I got a phone call at 3 am. I asked him about it the next morning and he said he wasn't going to say it again until I was ready. Which I was but I told him I was gonna wait until I saw him in person.

I've never said it first and in comparison I don't think I ever really meant it before I met him.

Irisandoleander · 2016-09-05T20:11:17+00:00

I said it beyond too early. Like Ted Mosby style.

I'm not sure I remember the first time he said it but I know when he got close. He would say "I love .............. hanging out with you" and like I knew what he meant. But he couldn't say it yet. So it kinda became a thing for a little while.

timeforstretchpants · 2016-09-05T20:14:00+00:00

I really, really wanted him to say it first. Uggggh. But I waited months and he never said it. Finally I was so head-over-heels for him that I couldn't hold it in any longer.

To stave off a potentially awkward situation, I said it while he was asleep. I just had to let out the "i love you". It felt good it say out loud.

Except he wasn't asleep. He heard it and he didn't say anything back, which was what I had been dreading. He just cuddled me in closer.

Months after that, it came up in conversation that he felt telling someone he loved her was THE commitment to love forever, and he didn't want to say it until he was on his knee with ring in hand.

≖﹏≖

Sweet, but OMG the agony.

After that we turned into an LDR and he visited me. On the last morning we were savoring our final groggy snuggle and finally he said "you know I love you, right?"

Bawling.

So I got a glimmer a full year+ after I said it to him. Not the staring into my soul profession of love I've been waiting for, but I already knew he loves me. He's moving continents for me.

MoriKei · 2016-09-05T20:27:00+00:00

We had been seeing each other for about two months, but had only officially been a couple for about three weeks (so about 10 weeks in, I believe). He said it first (it actually kinda slipped out!) when he was leaving for the night and I said it back without thinking, it was just so natural. It still gives me butterflies thinking about it! A lot of people said it was too early for us but we had an amazing connection from the moment we met... like the second I met him, I just knew and so did he. :)

kitsunethreetails · 2016-09-05T20:40:16+00:00

I said it first, but in french, and it was maybe just over a month into dating each other. I told him "Je T'aime" and he responded in english with "I Love you too."

whitebunny87 · 2016-09-05T22:40:34+00:00

I said it first, about 2 months in, but I was totally wussy about it. We'd been out with friends and had a few wines and I was just so enamoured and and squishy and in love that I couldn't not say something. But I was afraid of putting myself out there in case he didn't feel the same, so I mumbled something like "ugh, I think I'm really falling for you, how corny is that?"

He just pulled me in close and said "I love you, too" and that was that :D

thisisophelia · 2016-09-06T12:47:40+00:00

My husband said it first, I think it was after 4 weeks of dating. We were lying in bed and he held me very tightly.

And then he said: I know it's too early and I don't want to scare you away. But I cannot withhold this anymore: I love you.

To be honest, I didn't even think about saying I love you simply because usually you don't tell someone that you love them that early. But I knew that I loved him, I just wanted to adhere to the rules of dating :D

So I replied with I love you too and we kissed and wallowed in bliss.

BellaScarletta · 2016-09-05T18:12:45+00:00

I wasn't going to answer since I'm not "there" in my current relationship, but I do still have some thoughts so why not.

I think in my experience 2-3 months is usually when the feelings start coming. The first semi-serious relationship I was in, I said it first around that time. In the second, he said it first. For me at least, the L-word feelings start as small blips and moments, and then begin to come in more extended surges that eventually blend together. I wouldn't feel comfortable saying it until those feelings were consistent and not fleeting.

Now, I feel I would leave it to the man to say it first. Not out of a desire to be "winning", but more to let him set that pace without pressure. That being said, I'm in a new relationship and would say I'm in the "extended surges" stage. Once things become more constant feeling, I could imagine having trouble keeping it to myself.

I'm more excited to hear stories from people who are much farther into their relationships and look back on that stage of it (:

i_have_a_semicolon · 2016-09-05T20:09:33+00:00

I said it after 2 months which seemed soon but I knew it. I sort of "took it back" because he didn't say it back and I thought he was, whoops. Well he said it a month later. That was almost 4 years ago :)

katsumii · 2016-09-05T20:57:16+00:00

I probably prompted it first... That's typically me. He for sure was the first to hint that he was developing feelings for me and caring about me; he said along the lines of, "Hormones and endorphins suck." And all I did was agree/concur with him on that point. The sex was awesome and we were getting pretty darn attached. I don't remember how far into the relationship we were when I would have brought it up. It had to have been after a few months. I probably said something like, "I think I love you." I'm the most awkward ever. :P

More often than not, I'm the one who says it first (on a day-to-day basis).

I looove it when he says it first, and I try to hold off so that he'll be the next one to say it first (though sometimes I give in to temptation and I say it).

To help me out in between times, I think it in my mind, like, "I love you, I love you, I love you I love you," almost trying to send I-love-you vibes through the air to him or something. Or when he does something nice for me, I say thanks, and think, "I love you!" Hopefully this isn't unhealthy - lol. It helps me stay calm, always on his side, and not rage at him anymore, anyway.

lo_andbehold_ · 2016-09-06T15:16:26+00:00

My husband told me that I was his before he ever said "I love you" and it was maybe a few weeks after that I made the leap and said it. I knew he loved me, but I didn't want to say it first! I waited until I couldn't contain it anymore haha

zombiegroupie82 · 2016-09-08T06:07:17+00:00

My husband said it first. we had been dating like 8 weeks :p I had had so many bad relationships and thought men loved me, thought I loved them back, but I never really did. Even had to work at it with my husband (boyfriend at the time) but I believed him.

Title	"I Love You"
Author	BellaScarletta
Upvotes	8
Comments	39
Date	September 5, 2016 5:26 PM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWives
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWives/comments/51ahqe/i_love_you/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWives/i-love-you.209618 https://theredarchive.com/post/209618

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