A stupid question.

HappyWifeLife · 2014-10-03T20:48:51+00:00

Shit happens?

moggymojo · 2014-10-03T23:13:07+00:00

I hate people farting/belching around me too, I think it is gross and I think it is disrespectful to contaminate the common environment with stink when there is the option to go do it elsewhere.

I have never willingly farted in front of my partner (I leave the room), though occassionally one sneaks out (where upon I will apologise).

All of that said; my husband farted in front of me on our first date, and at the time I literally thought "oh god, he's a farter! Am I prepared to date him?" (yes I hate it that much!)

On that day I decided that this man was worth putting up with open farting.

Having made that decision early on I have stuck with it.

The thing is HE doesn't consider it disrespectful, so he is not intending to convey disrespect no matter what I think. I HAVE to take his intentions into account.

I don't shame him or criticise him for farting, I generally don't acknowledge it at all. Occasionally I will make a light comment about 'squeaky floors' or 'stepping on frogs' with a smile, just to show that it is not a big deal without actually setting up a pattern of bursting into applause for a toot.

That said once in a while it is funny; if we are already laughing about something and he laughs so hard he farts, and it sets up a recursive loop.... I mean, that is funny even to me.

Take his intentions into account. He doesn't think it is disgusting or disrespectful AND in your case he actively thinks it is funny. While you might not appreciate his anal knock-knock jokes he isn't intentionally trying to disgust you he is relaxing and joking around with you.

You might prefer a different method but you have a partner who is being playful - if you respond to that angrily, in disgust etc then you will be rebuffing not only the farting but other light hearted playfulness, openess and ease which should be part of a LTR.

You have said it is not a major issue, just an annoyance; so don't MAKE it a big deal.

This falls WELL into the category of 'don't sweat the small stuff' and well into the realm of something you can adjust your attitude about (and that far more easily than you can adjust his behaviour and with more positive consequences).

HappySnowGirl · 2014-10-03T21:15:50+00:00

Do you have kids? I dare you not to laugh the first time one of your babies loudly rips one in public.

It's just a fart. If a man can't fart comfortably in his own home without being shamed and ridiculed, I feel sorry for him.

Thank you for this. It reminded me to check my priss face next time my husband spends forever in the loo. ;)

Edit: My husband watched people come out of my vagina. It's only fair that he can fart whenever he wants.

Bakerofpie · 2014-10-03T22:31:52+00:00

You don't act like a horrible, prissy bitch when your husband farts, that's how you handle it. Are you expecting a lesson in how to get him to feel ashamed of his bodily functions? I don't really think fart jokes are very funny in general either. I don't LIKE to be farted on. It isn't a fun pastime of mine. But I married a human, and sometimes humans have less than pleasant bodily functions. Sometimes your husband will annoy you and do things you think aren't funny. The only options are to deal with it or decide that revealing he is indeed not a robot is a deal breaker and find a new husband.

sugarcrush · 2014-10-03T20:49:23+00:00

I will never ever ever have a farting contest, but come on, farts are funny! And so is poop. I mean it's stuff that comes out of your butt how can you do anything but laugh lol

aTweetingBird · 2014-10-03T23:49:33+00:00

I'm the prudest when it comes to things like that. While I try not to let loose in front of my husband (or anyone), when he cuts one, of course I laugh. But only if he laughs first! Sometimes I just pretend I didn't hear it.

TheTerrorSquad · 2014-10-04T01:45:03+00:00

your husband needs to give you a dutch oven.

homo_homini_lupus · 2014-10-03T20:39:50+00:00

A man who has a woman who laughs appreciatively at his farts is a happy man.

ACityGirl · 2014-10-03T22:25:41+00:00

A stupid question.

I think you answered it yourself.

I originally thought, "There are no stupid questions! Especially when people are just trying to figure things out!"

But your attitude has made that platitude false; you didn't come here for answers, you came here to...what? Have people say it's okay to be rude?

I hope you can find peace. In order to do that, you have to rid yourself of that anger in your heart.

EDIT: I apologize. I do think what I said was true, but I think you might have really come to this sub because you are trying, and I implied that you are not at all. It will take time and effort, but you really can take a step back and not sweat the small stuff. Care for your family. Have a happy marriage.

PhantomDream09 · 2014-10-03T20:45:14+00:00

How long have you been married/how long did you date? Humor isn't usually something that suddenly comes out of nowhere, so either you were fine ignoring this until now or he hid it from you until recently (?).

my-redpillthrowaway · 2014-10-03T23:14:24+00:00

I wouldn't worry about it unless he rips out some stinky farts.

Hilarious thread though :D

wibblezibble · 2014-10-04T01:40:34+00:00

I've heard of people who have never farted in front of their spouse and never heard their spouse fart. This concept is just bizarre to me.

It's a normal, healthy function of your body. There are absolutely times when you shouldn't fart, but I can't imagine a life where I would be unable to fart in the comfort of my home.

Bea_Noemi · 2014-10-04T05:37:18+00:00

I'm there with you, OP. My SO and I agreed that we don't include the other in any toilet habits (I believe for me it degrades the intimacy in my relationship) and I have asked that he not intentionally pass gas in front of me. If he hadn't agreed to that I wouldn't have thought too much of it, but it is my preference and he did agree.

MeowZedong- · 2014-10-04T01:27:18+00:00

I think you should remove the stick from your butt so you can toot. Then have a nice laugh over it.

stillnoturday · 2014-10-04T02:04:14+00:00

Guy here, just tell him that it isn't funny. However realize it is a natural bodily function and will happen. Doesn't mean he can dutch oven you or stuff like that.

Cooking_And_Cats · 2014-10-03T23:31:19+00:00

My SO literally never farts or burps. It's the weirdest thing. I on the other hand have my share of bodily functions. I really think it's related to diet as he always ate cleaner then me and now that I've begun to eat clean my occurrences are going wayyy down. He was always pretty understanding about it but it was always mortifying for me. Maybe try to switch up your meals? Try reducing/eliminating dairy, red meat, beans, or experiment to figure out what it is as everyone's body is different. As for the actual humor part I don't know what to tell you expect that men are like that. In fact my SO found my bodily functions to be hilarious when I hatedddd it!

eatplaycrush · 2014-10-04T01:11:14+00:00

Is this even real? Do you act completely disgusted when you fart? 10/10 would bet you don't.

Hate to break it to you, but bodily functions are natural. Be concerned over things like Ebola, not farts.

ALadyLikeMe · 2014-10-04T01:50:28+00:00

I say "Bless you!" same as when he sneezes.

And your SO farts are much better than anyone else's farts. A girlfriend and her boyfriend were recently visiting and slept on our pull out couch. I was in the kitchen and I heard the dude fart in his sleep and I was SO GROSSED OUT! But I realized that I am actually not so grossed out by my SO's farts in comparison (well except for if they're reeeally stinky!)

aZombieKitten · 2014-10-04T03:39:30+00:00

My SO farts and then proceeds to laugh the second I saw "ew" or "stinky." He's such a gassy man no matter what he eats, so I've learned to laugh at it rather than acting like it's disgusting. Now, I may leave the vicinity if it smells horrible, but I'm not going to get mad at him over it.

You need to learn to have a little humor and not be so serious about something everyone does. Don't be so prissy.

Title	A stupid question.
Author	learningred
Upvotes	0
Comments	66
Date	October 3, 2014 8:32 PM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/2i7y8e/a_stupid_question/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/a-stupid-question.165802 https://theredarchive.com/post/165802

Comments