Caught out...

Sepean · 2018-05-09T12:42:25+00:00

So your wife begins to look hotter.

Then one day you find out she's been reading "the 31 day makeover".

Oh no, she's busted, all her dieting and working out and nicer clothing and more effort into hair and makeup, wasted.

SteelToeShitKicker · 2018-05-09T13:02:05+00:00

Came here looking for a /u/red-sfpplus story about getting caught fucking the au pair in a broom closet. Got a story about a book.

2ndal · 2018-05-09T12:16:26+00:00

What are you supposed to do now? Burn the books of course. And drop any lifting routines you've started. Replace the books with a set of more approachable relationship guides that you two can read together. Maybe start with the 5 Love Languages. Whatever you do just bury any sign of masculinity and hope she doesn't bring it up again. Oh and look up a good Appletini recipe. Y'all can share one tonight!

The_Litz · 2018-05-09T12:17:49+00:00

Nothing. You keep going and follow your MAP.

Let her think whatever she wants, you are improving yourself regardless of her.

You say pity sex... I say hamster is running and she is upping the sex. In an autistic way you upped the dread.

Now you know what to do next, fix your OPSEC brother.

CaptJohnLukeDiscard · 2018-05-09T12:24:39+00:00

Stop worrying about her. Yes, fix your OpSec but that’s about it. Become a good enough man that if she “finds out” she won’t give a shit because you are worth it.

She can hamster away anything she sees, good or bad, in your favor or against you. It all comes down to if she wants you or not.

So be the prize. Be the man that the hamster spins shit the right way for. But stop worrying about her.

Read. Lift. Eat clean. STFU.

JDRoedell · 2018-05-09T12:42:27+00:00

Ya I would have cared about this back in the beginning too.

Ask yourself why you care. Then ask yourself if you care if she cares. She’s probably already forgot about it.

FWIW my copy of Rational Male is in our living room on our shared bookshelf amongst my books.

Wolveryn · 2018-05-09T12:49:16+00:00

Busted? What are you 12 and she's your mum?

rebbit_reddit · 2018-05-09T12:36:13+00:00

“You don’t need that darling”

“It’s not for me. It’s for my girlfriend”

But seriously. I think it’s a good sign that she fucked you. If she had acted disgusted and not fucked you it would mean that she thought you were pathetic. The fact that she fucked you means that either she thinks you’re wanting to become more masculine for another woman and she feels the dread it else she is imagining what you’ll be like in 31 days and she is turned on by that

gameoflibidos · 2018-05-09T15:13:16+00:00

I was gonna roast you some.. but I see everyone has already done that for me.

My wife knows what I'm doing... (i know the mantra here is don't talk about fight club).. and in the beginning was lots of "Did those stupid books tell you to do that?" and other predicted horseshit came out of her mouth... but then it stopped. After you actually start getting it and begin the process from faking to making... it really doesn't matter if she knows or not. if she thinks you got it from a book or really what she thinks knows at all.

Once you look ripped... you're making decisions, running the house and leading her... and you become a testing sponge that just soaks them up and moves on.. it doesn't really matter if she knows how you got there or not, she doesn't care anymore.

Persaeus · 2018-05-09T14:10:57+00:00

You don’t need that darling!

exact same shit test as "i don't like big guys" when you start showing gainz.

this was probably pity sex...

probably not. most likely she just wanted to fuck (newsflash the world does not revolve around you). more likely she sees the train picking up speed and want's to make sure she has a ticket for the ride.

watch what she does OP not what she says.

but I felt busted

i haven't felt this in is so long i forgot what it feels like. i'm popeye the sailor

[deleted] · 2018-05-09T16:09:51+00:00

I didn’t put 2+2 together until today that this was probably pity sex...

not necessarily. women are wired funny. they tend to take any and all attempts at self improvement as a threat. they don't assume you're trying to improve for them, but for some other bitch

you're fine

mattizie · 2018-05-09T13:10:25+00:00

Who gives a fuck if you found out "naturally" or if you had to learn?

If you become a better man, women will want to fuck you, and that may include your wife, the end result is the same.

While you're at it here's another book for you that I quite enjoyed, "Pimp: the story of my life".

wildnight98 · 2018-05-10T11:28:30+00:00

I made the rookie mistake of follow NMMNG's advice and telling her about it. For a while I got shit tests about "you are acting this way because of that stupid book." I just framed my way through, treating these as regular shit tests like any other. I haven't heard about NMMNG from her in months.

I did read one suggestion somewhere that was too late to help me. If she brings up "31 days" you can say, yeah interesting book, there's some things I agree with and some things I don't agree with.

cholomite · 2018-05-09T12:23:09+00:00

You should do whatever you have to do to make your wife feel as though this new you was inside you all along, and that you didn't just "learn" it from a book.

Whatever reason you have to give for owning the book doesn't matter, as long as she knows that this new masculine you is in your genes and not just some book on Amazon.

SteelSharpensSteel · 2018-05-09T12:34:55+00:00

Lol, busted.

You give too many fucks. There's a book about that. Perhaps you should order it and read it to your wife.

Two_kids_in_a_coat · 2018-05-09T14:12:10+00:00

In my experience pity sex doesn’t really exist. She’s not gonna get herself horny and escalate just because she feels bad. More likely she knows you’re working on self improving, she’s noticing, hamsters are running.

SeamusAwl · 2018-05-09T16:02:52+00:00

I didn’t put 2+2 together until today that this was probably pity sex...

Or maybe it was actually dread. Because women know that when a woman decides to improve themselves apart form their partner, it is because they are trying to get apart from their partner. Remember that woman are solipsistic by design and can only really view things from their point of view. Most likely she hamstered that you are wanting to leave so she is trying to keep you.

[deleted] · 2018-05-09T16:16:31+00:00

It wasn’t pity sex. Acting a certain way with a women will attract those kinds of offerings from a women.

the_grizzlebee · 2018-05-09T19:50:03+00:00

Wife finds "The Art of Seduction" on my bookshelf (it's not hidden, I think it's a cool book, shrug)

"What's this all about, some kind of player shit?"

"It's some prose about seducing different types of women. Would you like to know which type you are?"

The sex was good.

Fritz_Frauenraub · 2018-05-09T20:27:03+00:00

You think that's bad, wait til she finds this place and loses her shit over you getting life advice from a bunch of bitter misogynists.

Why is she in your amazon account anyway?

mrpCamper · 2018-05-09T20:49:44+00:00

"You don’t need that darling!" is really the only reply any decent woman would say.

screechhater · 2018-05-09T22:31:06+00:00

keep taking the pity sex until it isn't handing it out

So where the fuck are you at in your MAP ?

What are you stats ?

matrixtospartanatLV · 2018-05-10T01:06:14+00:00

Graham? Baby?

You are 38 years old. A father, husband, and a male, trying to become a man.

OPSEC.

Google it.

Even better, search for it here, in MRP, and TRP. You will find scores of relatable posts with advice.

In the meantime, stop posting.

You have posted more in 8 days than I have in a year.

SHUT THE FUCK UP.

Stop typing, start reading, and FOCUS.

BlackFire68 · 2018-05-10T11:26:05+00:00

Well, you've reacted to her words, and that's a no-no. You felt busted, but what did you do? You respond to her actions. She had sex with you. Don't try to figure out "what kind of ex" it was.

Do what you are going to do, react only to what she does, and keep on keeping on.

Title	Caught out...
Author	GrahamBaby
Upvotes	8
Comments	41
Date	May 9, 2018 12:12 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askMRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/8i5gth/caught_out/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askMRP/caught-out.204523 https://theredarchive.com/post/204523

Comments