Did I fail?

HornsOfApathy · 2021-12-24T04:52:08+00:00

You cannot negotiate desire.

Covert contracts. NMMNG 101.

ImPissedOffALot · 2021-12-24T08:38:14+00:00

I’m gonna assume you tried something new, and it backfired terribly. That’s better than doing the same old shit you did previously.

Your wife proposed to go for something intimate and you turned that into a transactional sexual relation. Of course it went wrong. What did you do then ?

You defended. You excused. You explained. You rationalized.

There was no frame to hold then.

Chard-Far · 2021-12-24T07:33:51+00:00

So let me get this straight, wife asks you to touch her and you manage to turn it into a transaction. Why would anyone, including you, want to get touched in a certain way as a part of a transaction with his spouse?

Do you even love your wife?

NicestGuyIKnow · 2021-12-24T05:54:46+00:00

You shoulda rubbed her back n then transitioned slowly down her ass then start rubbing her pussy mound or asshole. If she cuts u off before she starts grinding on ur hand u don’t act butthurt just stop.

oobertas · 2021-12-24T04:41:07+00:00

I'm going with your username on this one. Jesus, man. Wake the fuck up.

Praexology · 2021-12-24T12:53:47+00:00

We've been going through a DB so I felt this was the perfect time to be more overt.

It certainly was more overt, but was simultaneously equally unattractive.

Let's be generous and say it was a smart idea to say

if you give me a bj I'll rub your back.

When she replied disingenuously with

I don't like being forced into sexual acts. I just want my back rubbed

Is when you should have STFU - she knows she's being intellectually unfair but doesn't care. Any follow-up you give legitimizes her bad behavior.

Why do you even want to stay with your wife?

SelectAirline · 2021-12-24T08:34:11+00:00

You went full retard.

ragnar_Daneskjold · 2021-12-24T15:29:24+00:00

Dude, I just read a post of yours from dead bedrooms. Your situation is dire. You need a gym membership IMMEDIATELY. Do not wait for January 1st.

You need to think of a couple of hobbies and put ALL of the time and energy that you want to put into your marriage into these hobbies (and yourself in general) instead.

You need to prepare for divorce, mentally, emotionally, and logistically (meeting with an attorney). Might not happen but you need to prepare.

How fat are you? Buy a measuring tape and use an online calculator to figure out your navy body fat %. Don’t expect many women to want to suck you off until you’re near 15% and below.

About two years ago I had a three month period of sex once a month. I was rich, fun, physically “average” and a very good husband/dad, so I was very confused by this sexlessness. When I first found this sub I was having sex once a week if I was lucky.

As of today I can hardly believe the life I’m living (including my sex life) and I’m just starting to see what my full potential might be. Good luck.

RStonePT · 2021-12-24T16:59:35+00:00

Whats your win condition? Do you know?

kingmanifestation · 2021-12-24T08:09:24+00:00

If you are with her and she says "I dont want like being forced into sexual acts. I just want my back rubbed." your doing a whole lot of something wrong.

Your asking your wife for a bj like actually asking her that? .....Your not going to get a bj, if you ask for a bj.

thats weird my guy..

Redpillbrigade17 · 2021-12-24T13:12:52+00:00

Sad. And classic. Mr Nice Guy dies a thousand deaths every day.

SteelSharpensSteel · 2021-12-24T17:18:01+00:00

So did you sign up for a gym membership yet, Mr. DeadBedroom?

You are not a attractive person. You are just a Ford Focus.

omured · 2021-12-25T10:59:22+00:00

The question is: did you have fun asking for the BJ? Because it was clear you were not getting a BJ before asking. And you were not getting a BJ after asking.

So which was the point of asking? Have fun? Shake the boat? See how it feels to ask a stupid question? See how she reacts?

They are all ok if it is ok for you. Important is to know why you asked. Take note. And DNGF about her reaction. Have fun.

ReddJive · 2021-12-24T12:48:24+00:00

I am not even going to unpack this.

Yes you failed. You can't negotiate desire/attraction.

You should have STFU to begin with and given her the massage like a good little beta you are.

Chard-Far · 2021-12-24T07:28:55+00:00

Could you be even more autistic?

KaiPecos · 2021-12-24T15:35:27+00:00

You lost frame the minute you went into a transactional overt mode to obtain sex by using barter instead of seduction. The only good thing you did was to STFU after she rebuffed your propositioning her like a hooker. if you had continued after overt and sub- communications all were saying don't touch me, then you would have lost even more frame in a disastrous way.

wkndatbernardus · 2021-12-24T22:39:21+00:00

Haha, dem ho's be lovin dat quid pro quo, fo shizzle.

WolfofAllStreetz · 2021-12-24T23:34:22+00:00

Hookers cheaper than this and no need to back rub.

Make yourself worthy of a man who doesn't need to ask for a BJ.

thisisme0007 · 2021-12-24T11:15:13+00:00

If only it worked that way there would be no need for the red pill.

I'm assuming you've just read a couple posts and aren't working your way through the sidebar and lifting.

You can have some fun with her stupid request for a backrub but you can't expect to make "overt contracts" like you did and get anywhere.

Her: I could really use a backrub.

You: [laughs obnoxiously as you walk out the door to go to the gym] HAHAHAHA!

You: [playfully as you walk out the door to go to the gym] Well maybe if you gave me more blowjobs, I'd feel more comfortable and could start giving you backrubs.

You: I can't, I have to go to the gym now.

Hopefully you pick up on the theme.

Tyred_Biggums · 2021-12-24T14:04:15+00:00

Did I hold frame or lose the test?

You can’t lose what you never had.

And yes you failed. Miserably.

Pristine-Implement0 · 2021-12-24T05:30:31+00:00

Not past tense, failed. You fail and are failing. Stfu, read, lift

iwimlr · 2021-12-24T06:06:49+00:00

you are asking for a covert contract

adeptintact · 2022-01-04T04:13:33+00:00

For me, my wife will give me a BJ and swallow. I tell her not to miss a single drop. If she does a good job, I'll massage her back. Reward good behavior, not the other way around.

TheGuitto · 2022-01-17T21:20:14+00:00

Bro, girls don't like being treated like that. You need to seduce her not negotiate sexual acts

Title	Did I fail?
Author	dontevenbother12
Upvotes	16
Comments	62
Date	December 24, 2021 4:35 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askMRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/rne3f0/did_i_fail/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askMRP/did-i-fail.1090906 https://theredarchive.com/post/1090906

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