Got a Shit Test thrown at me today

parkerfiveone · 2018-10-31T20:05:51+00:00

Order her flowers, then rush home and get the dishes and laundry done. Be sure to hang her shit up just the way she likes it. Once you're done with that, you should write her a sonnet or poem about how you feel. Be sure to tell her how you guys are soul mates.

Good luck.

youscum · 2018-10-31T12:47:27+00:00

Uh...wut?

Grade-A trolling. Haha I love this post.

The_Litz · 2018-11-01T05:57:04+00:00

"My wife is a cunt."

Go write it out on a piece of paper x500.

Post the pic here and we will talk.

Sepean · 2018-10-31T12:51:59+00:00

This has to be a troll, but anyways.

I told her

STFU

But how to pass the Bull Shit test not sleeping on the couch and maintaining frame.

I assume she's not able to physically force you to sleep on the couch, so just ignore her ramblings.

Recently her physical reactions got less but I don't want to give her permission to slap me actually

That's a new one, negotiating attraction with dick slaps. Still won't work.

Redpillbrigade17 · 2018-10-31T15:02:35+00:00

You should definitely sleep on the couch on your own going forward. Maybe have her feed you dog food too. Collar your beta ass and put a chastity belt on your dick, give her the key. You may only use it from now on when she says it’s OK.

screechhater · 2018-10-31T22:17:02+00:00

You barely exist.

As in existing in her frame

becoming_alpha · 2018-10-31T22:15:54+00:00

she threatend to... divorce because it was already a shit load I had on my bill

What? She threatened divorce because you masturbated and told her about it? Does she threaten divorce if you forget to buy milk at the store too?

I didn't gave in. But she said you're sleeping on the couch for two nights. I got to slap your dick twice and we don't have sex for another two weeks.

I hope you didn't say yes, but even if you did, tell her you changed your mind. You're sleeping in your bed, period. She's not physically capable of removing you from your bed, so that's where you sleep.

You badly need to set boundaries around physical abuse. Shut that shit down. Tell her all permission to hit or slap you is rescinded and you won't tolerate physical abuse from her. Restrain her if needed. Pick her up, take her outside your bedroom and lock her out if she can't behave. Like others said, treat her like a 3 year old throwing a tantrum, that's how she's acting. Don't take any of her words seriously, it's like a 3 year old calling you a poopyface.

Even entertaining that she should be giving you any consequences for your "bad behavior" is laughable and shows you're so deep in her frame you can't even see it.

Read NMMNG first, grow a backbone and balls (actually retrieve them from her purse), read WISNIFG and learn to fog the shit out of her mouth sounds. You have a long way to go, but asking the questions and reporting back is a first step. Now, get to work.

Frosteecat · 2018-11-01T00:58:50+00:00

I guess getting your dick slapped is at least more than some of us when we started here...you’re way ahead of the curve!! Maybe you can slap her vagina as punishment for slapping your dick and then you two will be in a junk slapping loop which MAY result in simultaneous orgasms!!! Try it!

jcrpta · 2018-11-03T20:41:39+00:00

She's saying "divorce" because you've already made clear that you don't want to do that - and indeed think you probably could not replace her.

In other words, she's not saying it because she means it, she's saying it because the words give her power.

Who gave the words power? You did, when you agreed to go for counselling in the first place. You demonstrated that you really did not want to divorce her. And so - because there's no way she can win a physical argument with you - she's instead arguing on her terms using weapons she knows you can't handle.

Here's the good news: Not only did you give the words power, you can take it away. And you can take it away right now. First thing you're going to do, you're going to buy WISNIFG (on Kindle or some other electronic format so you can start reading it right away). Don't tell her you're reading it, don't tell her you're putting any part of it into practise, just do it.

Next time she comes up with stupid stuff like "We're getting a divorce! And you're sleeping on the couch! And I get to slap your penis! And we're not having sex for two weeks! And....", you laugh and then ignore it.

Don't stand around arguing the finer points, you'll wind up in a bickering match. Don't agree to it meekly. Just let her shout herself out.

RandomlyChosenTitle · 2018-10-31T14:24:52+00:00

she refused to have sex obviously...my wife asks me from time to time if I mastrubated (She wants me to have it with her instead doing it alone)

So she shoots you down for sex and then still expects you to ask permission to jerk off? Unless you're in some sort of D/s relationship and you get off on being her bitch, this is easily the most pathetic thing I've seen here.

JDRoedell · 2018-10-31T13:24:05+00:00

Sounds like years of you letting her treat you this way and get off on making you wait had put you here. Can’t be undone in a month. Probably not even a year.

TheThirdT · 2018-10-31T14:56:03+00:00

This can't be real, but...

Why would you want to go out on an evening event with this woman?

Why do you care if she stays at her sisters for a few days?

Why do you not call her bluff on divorce and present her with divorce papers?

Why would you sleep on the couch?

Why would you give her permission to slap you?

Why not jerk off whenever you want to?

Why would you let someone else make rules for when you can fuck or not?

470_2_700_nm · 2018-11-01T01:39:10+00:00

Are you from India? Just a hunch.

Hey man you have jack shit for options. Lift, sidebar, and get yourself to the point where if that dick slapping bitch continues you can opt out with another plate you have forged and have in waiting.

Let me guess - your boss likes to power lay you too,

Get options mother fucker.

Ivabighairy1 · 2018-11-01T02:01:06+00:00

YOU are sleeping in your bed, if she wants to sleep in it as well she's putting out. If she doesn't, she' sleeping on the couch.

BigGayGainz · 2018-11-01T12:49:59+00:00

Hey if she is slapping your dick at least she is touching it. Seriously you need to lift. Stop reading and go lift and don't ever let anyone hit you again. If you do its your own damn fault.

RedPillCoach · 2018-11-01T17:42:57+00:00

Newly awakened guy without a clue or well executed Troll? You be the judge.

I will assume this is real since I am sure it happens often enough, especially with the 1-2 week wonders.

Wife of 2 years

And already an occasional DB? Ohh boy, this guy made it here just on time.

on her period these days so she refused to have sex obviously. But all my advances, frame, getting her into the mood, attraction etc. didn't go anywhere.

Which is why we are thinking this must be a Troll. However, it could also be a typical, spergy new guy who has not understood or assimilated all of this information. If you don't have sex on the rag (many people don't) then why the fuck are you initiating and "getting her in the mood?" Fail!

---Something, something masturbation homoerotic fantasy fanfiction-----

Seriously, nobody gives a fuck if you wake up with a boner and go slap the monkey. Fuck you for putting the image in my mind. Do whatever the fuck you want. You think we are here to give you absolution? Fine- Go say 10 Hail Rollo's and pray to be released from the Matrix. You might start by opening your eyes (I know they hurt- its because you have never used them).

Since my wife asks me from time to time if I mastrubated (She wants me to have it with her instead doing it alone), I told her before I droped her of for an appointment.

No idea what this means. I assume it means you admitted to mommy that you did a bad thing?

The shit test begun.

Of course it did. How could you expect otherwise? You are either a Troll or a Sperg, or both.

Go to her sister

Fine. Have a nice time.

divorce....no sex for 2 weeks....sleep on couch

WTF? This needs to be called out immediately and stopped- or you need to call the bluff. Don't tolerate this. Pure, naked power grab and I would take it all the way to divorce court. Don't permit the word "divorce" to be said in your home. Don't sleep in any bedroom except the one you want to sleep in. Don't let her control when you have sex- if she doesn't want it then you should first work on becoming an attractive, in-charge man and then you should be finding somebody who does, married or not the rules are the same.

vilmatus · 2018-11-26T19:03:59+00:00

Did she really freak out like that just for an innocent fap? Dude you need to dump her, any woman should slap your dick unless you asked for

bueller6626 · 2018-10-31T12:51:17+00:00

I have trouble following exactly what happened. Try proofreading your post and adding a bit more detail, including how long you've been married.

FlyingSexistPig · 2018-10-31T12:55:24+00:00

RAMBO!

Title	Got a Shit Test thrown at me today
Author	shittest711
Upvotes	0
Comments	69
Date	October 31, 2018 12:42 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askMRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/9sycuo/got_a_shit_test_thrown_at_me_today/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askMRP/got-a-shit-test-thrown-at-me-today.203836 https://theredarchive.com/post/203836

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