Dating 20s vs 30s

cykablyat098 · 2024-02-15T15:09:07+00:00

I would say dating in your 30s is a lot better, you are more more mature than in your 20s, have a career, have wealth/ money (yes both are different) plus you prioritise better. For example weekdays might be difficult cause you know work/ gym / schedule.. this automatically opens you upto quality or similar people save for the already married/ family ones

reaprofsouls · 2024-02-15T22:33:50+00:00

Alright this is tough. I was a serial dater from 24-30. I would go on dates with 2-3 different women a week. Eventually I'd find one that worked. Date a few months then break it off. I sourced primarily through dating apps since I worked a lot and I'm mostly antisocial. I dated about 150 people in that time and never really fell in love or felt compelled enough to want to be with them.

I dated multiple women through social circles and they tended to be more attractive, accomplished and smarter than dating apps. If you can source this route you should.

After a frustrating 8 month relationship, in my 30s now, my dating pool was bad. Every date through the apps were disasters. Most women were 30+ and brought a fuck ton of baggage. Most dates people asked me my timeline for marriage and kids the first date. I understand why but man I wasn't ready for that talk with a stranger.

I eventually changed my age on apps (26) (I look very young) and started dating women graduating college or just graduated. Instantly life was great. A million matches, people wanting to have fun and just do stuff together. I started a casual relationship with someone and came clean the second it started becoming serious. We are now engaged and it's my dream relationship.

I'm not proud of those days nor that time in my life. I was hustling. I'd sit around in relationships and think "is this the best I can do?" Even if I told myself yes, I'd get so unhappy I'd end it. My Mom and I were talking about my engagement and said to me, "you were a little slut when you were younger". I looked at her and said, "I don't regret it". I'm in a perfect relationship. I could be fired from my job and honestly not care. My home life is so satisfying nothing outside of it matters.

Tldr: My advice, do what you need to, to find women that you bond with. If that's rock climbers, lawyers, doctor's w.e find where they are and be there. Start socializing and building those relationships. Go on dates, a lot of dates. Feel free to cut them short. You get better at finding people you will match with and identifying what you want.

cpcallen · 2024-02-15T16:59:55+00:00

Learn a partnered dance. Salsa, swing, tango, etc.—try a few and pick which most interests you based on the music and the crowd.

Depending on what dance style and what city, there are likely to be more women than men. Don't make a pest of yourself: most of the women are there to dance, not to be picked up, and some scenes (swing, notably) have a low tolerance for guys overtly hitting on women. But a guaranteed way to meet lots of interesting and attractive women, with the bonus of removing physical contact as a barrier to be overcome.

void-space- · 2024-02-15T18:12:09+00:00

I ditched the dating apps and went cold approach only and make my intentions clear upfront.

I have a date with a girl this weekend, and to my knowledge she is on Hinge, yet she’s going out with me a guy who isn’t even on any apps vs all the other guys she matched with / are in her DMs.

i went to a new city knowing no one and built up a large friend group. I prefer to go out solo though and don’t want to go with anyone when I’m out. i don’t prefer to have a wingman or anyone, I roll solo and meet new friends and women this way.

If you’re in a large city you can meet women anywhere, I do like the nightlife and meet a lot of women that way.

lemonyprepper · 2024-02-15T22:03:24+00:00

I think you aren’t factoring societal changes. Dating in the 2010s when I was in my 20s was GREAT. Just social life in general in NYC was great. But nowadays it SUCKS. People are WAYYYY too self involved, narcissistic, basic, and only looking to hang others who agree with everything they say. This is a consequence of social media gone, over reliance on dating apps wild and a world of political turmoil

Majin_Piccolo · 2024-02-15T14:27:09+00:00

Dating apps and nightlife spots

Total_Obligation_371 · 2024-02-16T01:12:42+00:00

The best way to supplement your dating options in your 30's is cold approach. It's not just the best, it's almost the only way unless you want to be either severely restricted by social circle and apps or build a lot of status/large social circle with high churn to compensate for the smaller amount of time/social opportunities at that age. Doubly true if you want girls in their 20's. 20's and 30's demographics mostly cross over naturally in mundane day to day activities/venues. It's fairly difficult/rare to "naturally" have an opportunity with a (for example) 25 year old if you're 35+ outside of grocery store, gas station, park etc.

shwasty_faced · 2024-02-15T18:50:11+00:00

Intentional outings: going and participating in activities you enjoy doing and building community and connections over time.

Things like:

a gym community
pickup sports at a park
outdoor recreation (skiing, biking, running, etc.)
music events (concerts, small local scene shows, not clubbing)

Casually meeting and re-meeting people in environments that you know you share common interest in and then just being yourself. If you don't find a partner, at the very least you'll build your social circle.

rjones416 · 2024-02-16T03:00:19+00:00

I'll be honest I get almost all of my dates from online dating. I even matched with women I know in real life and wouldn't have known they were into me if it wasn't for the app.

Most of my friends are married now and have kids. Going out isn't really an option anymore.

mottsman87 · 2024-02-15T16:30:18+00:00

M36. 30s dating for me compared to 20s is like being in an ocean, then teleporting to a desert. I hate it. Luckily, at 36, I prefer to live by myself. Think previous dating history has really left a bad outlook. Now I just watch peoples relationships and marriages fall apart in maybe 1 to 2 years.

COMFORT-ARLINGTON · 2024-02-15T15:40:11+00:00

you will have much fewer choices in your 30s compared to 20s. once you hit 30, alot of females will consider you old, and rule you out. chances are, you will also look worse as you age, and still attract fewer females. and in all honesty, people become less interested in dating after 30, so you wont be as motivated anymore. thats why i always tell young people to date as much as possible, because there will come a day when you just will give up. as a matter of fact, i know alot of people, both men, and women, who were dating in their 20s who just simply gave up after 30. there are also others who found someone by 30 and stopped dating

Upset_Painting3146 · 2024-02-15T18:43:12+00:00

You shouldn’t be single and ready to mingle after 30 it’s unnatural, of course its gonna be harder unless you’re looking for a wife which is when your income and mental maturity benefit you. We are designed to find our partners in our 20s, that’s when we look our best and have the most energy, by 30s you should be having kids and paying off a house not dating.

riordanajs · 2024-02-15T20:45:42+00:00

Cold approach is your friend. And while most of us don't feel at home in nightclubs, you have to think of them as a lead list of attractive women.

Daygame at festivals, happenings, sports events, whathaveyous might also work, as those would be pre-selected to your interests.

Nowadays in Germany coffee shops might be better option than bars, if you herbalise.

Emonmon15 · 2024-02-15T23:10:09+00:00

Become a regular in places where you have to socialize.

A bar or a restaurant, for example. If you frequently go out and talk to people you can eventually make new friends or even get dates.

DD_CloutGod · 2024-02-16T08:43:00+00:00

I'm currently 22M ... was never interested in going to party's or interacting with people outside my social circle in high-school I'd rather drink and smoke at home with friends this continued until after my 21st birthday. Mabye 4 months after I let someone convince me to go to a bar and It drastically changed me. Getting attention or approached by women when I was just there to drink and play pool with the homies .I was a lover boy or (nice guy) got crushed by one girl I actually found interest in. Learned alot of lessons from many random hookups after that. I'm still living the casual hookup life. But I can spot alot of different negative personality traits the women I casually hookup with have and if I can see myself with that person long term and mabye entertain that idea or just keep em around for that late night booty call. Haven't hit my 30s yet but I'm hoping I won't still be dating by the time I get there. Pretty sure I used personality in the wrong way. Idk the word that groups things like , manipulative narcissistic arrogant dishonesty and all the other red flag things everyday people have I have some to nobody's perfect but there's a select few that I'd never consider entertaining long term

Title	Dating 20s vs 30s
Author	Majin_Piccolo
Upvotes	115
Comments	111
Date	February 15, 2024 9:50 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1arbz7h/dating_20s_vs_30s/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/dating-20s-vs-30s.1427628 https://theredarchive.com/post/1427628

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