[deleted by user]

Huemanretreat4000 · 2022-10-17T04:43:38+00:00

Every girl is different. You'll have to use discernment to notice the subtle differences in their personalities. Learn how to read the vibe. Girls who are more guarded require more trust, patience and familiarity to become comfortable with you. Girls who are free-spirit, eccentric and wild go are heavy on the bad-boy vibes.

As for you, never audition for a chick...ever. Change your mindset from "Does she like me" to "Do I like her". Not every woman is worth your attention, time and energy. Not every girl has the juice. Vet these girls early. Remember, you are the boss. Rejection happens...but fuck it. Life goes on.

KompletterGeist · 2022-10-16T20:16:56+00:00

you've probably been overly gamey to a point where its blatantly obvious that you're putting on some kind of persona.

if you what you say comes off unnatural or like you planned it an hour ago what exactly you gonna say, that's gonna turn off any girl pretty quickly

mind you that girls are particularly good with social interactions or reading between the lines so they can sense that shit from 20m away against headwind

Hermit41 · 2022-10-17T08:20:08+00:00

From the sound of it you came off too try hard bro, tbh game is cool and all but girls aren’t stupid they can tell when your doing too much. And sometimes if your more focused on kino, push pull, etc a girl can tell from a mile away that your “performing”. Sometimes it helps to just focus on vibing with the girl and be focused on actually finding out if she’s even a right fit for you. From the sound of it she was feeling you if she complemented your eyes etc but maybe you just weren’t calibrated with where she was at a different point in the interaction then you were but of well you live you learn right. On to the next

SolidPuzzleheaded984 · 2022-10-16T18:53:00+00:00

No such thing as kino, push pull, frame, etc.

There’s she attracted to you and makes it easy for you, or she isn’t attracted and that means no matter what you say or do will change that.

It’s really simple.

Off2damoon · 2022-10-17T08:30:37+00:00

Here’s the truth - Women are unpredictable, finicky creatures and trying to over analyze what you specifically did wrong is a fruitless effort.

I’ve had women who have told me they love me after dozens of sexcapades go ghost. Girls who have shown massive interest and then act like a cold fish in person, and women who barely show any interest at all turn around and end up in bed. You will never know the reason. She could have a boyfriend that she didn’t tell you about, she could have bipolar disorder, she could have been triggered by one random sentence you said. You are trying to solve a mystery without any evidence.

The unfriending on snap is your clue to cut ties. I would send one last text calling her out for that in a light-hearted way and leave the door open for her if she wants to hit you up some day which shows you’re not butt-hurt by it but you won’t be chasing her. Then never text her again and consider her deceased. 1% chance she’ll hit you up one day in the future.

The only tried and true advice is to not get attached to any women, cut loses quickly and move on to the next one, realizing that there is no one girl who is so special she is irreplaceable. This is the key to happiness.

AssistTemporary8422 · 2022-10-17T03:49:05+00:00

Maybe she is just old fashioned or just doesn't like your vibe. The fact that she called you a bad boy means she is afraid you are trying to use her for a hookup.

Canadian-Seductioner · 2022-10-16T21:33:48+00:00

She probably lost interest. Move on to the next.

dobbs1997 · 2022-10-17T01:06:35+00:00

she may have felt intimidated

BloodPrince_COD · 2022-10-17T10:30:47+00:00

What’s kino advances ?

LucianU · 2022-10-17T12:46:46+00:00

It sounds to me like you gave off a player vibe and she was afraid you'd just fuck her and move on.

OrzhovPalatine · 2022-10-16T19:10:51+00:00

You probably came off a little heavy. Keep in mind a woman falls in love through her ears not her eyes so your looks IMO had nothing to do it.

You likely came off as really tryhard and she wasn't into it. IMO go over the interaction in your head if you want to figure out what you did wrong.

The fact you two met up means she was at least 51% interested. Everything else was in your court, you're auditioning to her at that stage anywho. So go over how the encounter went and figure out how you could of done better for the next one.

Delicatestatesmen · 2022-10-17T06:24:31+00:00

I am surprised that all you experienced dudes missed the glaring fact that escalating and doing kino shows too much interest and could also validate her.

Also escalating kino on first date runs the risk of over validating her. I agree he did something or acted in a way or said something to have her go from high interest to low interest.

I bet op was a clown or was too touchey and confusing to continue the date and being unfriended means she went from level 9 interest to zero.. sometimes dudes should just shut up and play mysterious but calm and watch how fast the panties come off when a girl has high interest instead of trying to game her.. if she has high interest you don’t have to do much less is better just coast.. you don’t need to win someone that already sees u as a winning catch..

Its like a client being referred to you from a friend and it’s basically a slam dunk deal because they already see you as a winning partnership.. instead of just going into meeting and closing the deal you talk the client out of doing business with you.. this is comparable.

bigm5995 · 2022-10-17T07:49:31+00:00

you were doing too much. you were giving her game she wasn't feeling it and instead of abandoning shit you keep pressing. you made her feel uncomfortable g. probably ease up a little bit but you should have noticed after a while that she wasn't feeling you man. just ease up and know when you are fighting a losing battle keep shooting though

WeaselRobot · 2022-10-17T12:56:31+00:00

Kino is a gauging mechanism. If she rejects it, you need more work on previous stages, like building more attraction or more comfort. This is basic M3 model stuff.

diefckrdie · 2022-10-17T17:16:50+00:00

it's a her thing, not a you thing. Most times, in dating, people's responses are reflective of their feelings or issues, more than yours. Not saying you mustn't introspect, but don't stress or obsess over it.

F7RD · 2022-10-17T17:37:59+00:00

She can say whatever she wants but kino doesn’t lie, get a new girl

recyclablebanthas · 2022-10-19T13:38:24+00:00

1

If a girl shuts down all ur kino advances does that mean just mean she doesn't find you physically attractive enough?

There is no one answer for this kind of question. In general it means one of a two things:

You pushed too hard and screwed yourself out of whatever chance you had.
She wasn't interested.

2

met up with a girl....

How did you meet this girl?

3

....and felt like she had her guard up the whole time even when I brought it down with jokes push pull every time I tried kino she absolutely wasn’t having it.

This is kind of vague as far as how the interaction was going. You're not talking at all about what the conversation topics were, what you were doing during this meetup, etc.

Context matters.

But in any case, this isn't some equation where you just tell jokes and then people are going to be into physical escalation automatically.

You need to actually calibrate what you're doing to the responses you're getting back from her.

If you were not in tune with the situation, then jokes would just make things worse. You shouldn't really be trying to be a comedian anyway. And push pull is often going to come off nakedly manipulative, which can reflect poorly on you as well.

In that situation, if you kept trying to physically escalate when you were already making mistakes, that was just going to dig the hole even deeper.

In short, you were kind of screwing yourself over.

4

....she made comments about how had I nice eyes and how I’m such a bad boy due to my idgaf attitude.

Classic mistake here: if you're doing things right, you shouldn't be pegged as a bad boy.

Sounds like you definitely came on too strong and she just thought of you as a manipulative dude she didn't want to be around.

5

....checked my snap afterwards and she unfriended me which doesn’t normally happen to me. trying to figure out if it was my looks or my game that was off?

You described enough about your game that it's clear the issue was bad calibration.

You were throwing everything at the wall hoping something would stick instead of actually paying attention to the person you're hanging out with and calibrating to what they were doing.

RedditsOlderBrah · 2022-10-16T20:25:27+00:00

your 'game' is absolutely fucked if you touched a girl and she responds like that.

Neo-Rio · 2022-10-17T03:14:37+00:00

You met up with a girl and what happened after that?

Did you take her home and push the envelope as far as you could?

Or did you just part ways afterwards?

Because if it's the latter (which I think it is), the unfriending is obvious.

Judging by the way she was talking there was a bit of dominance required by you to break down her walls and token resistance - and you failed to deliver.

partyn3xtd00r6 · 2022-10-17T05:08:50+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Fluffy_Risk9955 · 2022-10-17T17:20:22+00:00

One needs to screw up in order to learn social cues on the subject of kino.

devilkingx2 · 2022-10-18T07:02:29+00:00

Sounds like she wasn't into you to me. Whatever she said or did before the date to make you think she was interested, when it was time to walk the walk she didn't.

This is assuming you're properly socially calibrated and didn't come off as a horndog or a weirdo.

Off2damoon · 2022-10-19T11:30:19+00:00

Because something good CAN come out of it. Texting that he’s letting her know he’s aware of the situation, that he’s cool with it and it’s all good, and that she can feel free to hit him up if she changes her mind. If that message “made her more annoyed” and forever cemented his fate to never speak with her again then she’s probably a psychopath anyways and he’s dodged a bullet. It’s literally a win/win. LOL

Title	[deleted by user]
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	46
Comments	100
Date	October 16, 2022 6:43 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/y5oeqs/if_a_girl_shuts_down_all_ur_kino_advances_does/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/deleted-by-user.1248256 https://theredarchive.com/post/1248256

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