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[+]purplethizzle281 points 3 years ago [recovered] (9 children) | Copy Link
[–]viperex 102 points103 points104 points 3 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
that or, they’ll just stare at you from across the gym and will never speak to you
[–]Puzzled_Nail_1962 73 points74 points75 points 3 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I get it's probably a joke, but if every girl was staring at you wherever you go, you'd maybe enjoy it for a day and then it would just annoy you.
Now imagine they're all taller and twice as strong as you and wouldn't leave you alone.
[–]Sapper501 23 points24 points25 points 3 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link
They're twice* as strong as me? Maybe they can help spot me!
[–]UnceremoniousWaste 41 points42 points43 points 3 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Really and truly it is creepy and uncomfortable if you feel like it is. Most guys are desperate so they would be happy. But if a girl you found ugly did that to you you would feel that way or if a good looking girl did it for too long it might not be fully creepy but definitely uncomfortable.
[–]VictoriaSobocki 1 point2 points3 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Exactly
[–]futuremo 6 points7 points8 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yes you got it
[–]Gaydame 3 points4 points5 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
You're a man
[–]No-Might436 8 points9 points10 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Happened with me couple days ago, a really attractive girl was constantly making an eye contact from across the room, but here is the problem with that, sometime a guy think he has creeped out the girl and that's why she's looking at him, I sometimes wish women could just go and approch a guy like we males do.
[–]denimclad_secret 314 points315 points316 points 3 years ago (23 children) | Copy Link
Yep. Women are VERY conscious of personal space so if they breach yours or put themselves in proximity to be noticed/approached by you, its game on.
[–][deleted] 73 points74 points75 points 3 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
I'm still somewhat fairly new to this. Will keep this in mind next time something similar happens. Looking back now I'm sure I've missed a lot of opportunities.
[–]denimclad_secret 22 points23 points24 points 3 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Haha we all did Best course of action is if you're asking "is this really happening?" then it probably is.
[–]NoFap_FV 20 points21 points22 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Instructions unclear. Kidneys are missing
[–]AmberLeafSmoke 1 point2 points3 points 3 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Haha that's a good one. Pretty sure this happened to me today.
There's a hot girl at my gym and I see her a decent amount. I was spotting my buddy on the bench and she strolls over, squeezes in like an inch behind with her arse sticking out to grab a weight behind me. Didn't even say excuse me or anything, just got right up in my zone.
I remember thinking at the time "Did what I think happen just happen?" I'm fairly sure I've caught her looking or smiling over at me a couple of times too (I'm usually fairly zoned out so never really catch it).
Good to know I'm not imagining things haha
[–]denimclad_secret 1 point2 points3 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I'm fairly sure I've caught her looking or smiling over at me a couple of times too (I'm usually fairly zoned out so never really catch it).
So she had to make things a little more overt ( while still maintaining a level of deniability 😏)
Ofc your responsibility as your buddy's spotter is of the utmost. Eyes front, soldier.
[–]godofmilksteaks 12 points13 points14 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
As for the asking if your using a piece of equipment part. There's really not a lot to go on for random conversation starters at a gym. That's a pretty basic easy one to try to talk to someone if your nervous or just unsure of what to say. For the most part when I'm working out it's pretty obvious what people are or aren't using. Not always but mostly.
[–]rovch 0 points1 point2 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
A smile is never a bad way to start answering any of these challenges
[–]FaithInStrangers94 18 points19 points20 points 3 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
Would it kill them just to strike up a conversation like we’re expected to ?
[–]denimclad_secret 13 points14 points15 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I hear you, but these are just the rules of the game we are playing/stuck in.
Its always great when a woman breaks that one and approaches, but it's less common and usually requires them to a bit drunk and courageous.
[–]EarthquakeBass 6 points7 points8 points 3 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Most women are approached aggressively all the time so they basically just expect all men to act that way
[–]FaithInStrangers94 7 points8 points9 points 3 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
It’s a shame because most guys aren’t aggressive and disrespectful like that at all but as they say when you’re in the snake pit you have to assume they’re all venomous
[–]EarthquakeBass 1 point2 points3 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
There’s a fine line between “respectful” and “cowardly”. A lot of guys who claim they’re being respectful, just don’t have the balls.
For all the hyperventilating online about how guys worries they’re gonna get cancelled for normal, non-creepy flirting, most women I know are pretty damn tolerant of a respectful bid.
[–]Prior-Gold-118 33 points34 points35 points 3 years ago* (7 children) | Copy Link
Wait so this cute girl walked up to my bench and helped me made it flat after she saw me struggling to adjust it off incline. After she fixed it she stood there and looked at me for like 5 seconds and I was so surprised I just said thank you and continued my workout. After that I’ve caught her looking at me a few more times as well.
I took it as her being helpful but maybe I’m an idiot. I see her at the campus gym once a week so I’ll try to talk to her next time is see her
Oh you are, but don't worry, we all were at least once.
She WAS helping you. Helping you get your dick wet brother!!
Count 5 seconds out loud. It's a long time to stare without saying ANYTHING (well she may have been saying SOMETHING, it just was not verbally expressed to you). What was her body language like during this time?
[–]Prior-Gold-118 4 points5 points6 points 3 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
She may or may not have looked me up and down as she was getting up(couldn’t see that well because I didn’t wear contacts that day). Also she was also just standing directly facing me.
[–]denimclad_secret 5 points6 points7 points 3 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
At the very least you probably intrigued her more by NOT trying to chat her up then. Don't stress about it, if she's looking then rest assured others are too. And be ready for her 'help' next time
[–]Prior-Gold-118 2 points3 points4 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yeah next time I see her I plan to just ask if she can help me again.
[–]Jokerr_MD 5 points6 points7 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Jup, maybe. Next time you’re in and she’s there, ask her for a spot, then after the set if she sticks around just start a casual conversation and gauge interest. Good luck my man.
[–]Matheusmeister 0 points1 point2 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
there was one day I was at the gym, there was a girl who suddenly offered to take turns with me on the machine she was doing her exercise, at the moment she was on one machine and I was resting on the other
[–][deleted] 77 points78 points79 points 3 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
Well, for my female friends who have liked guys at the gym, they have always asked them some shitty usually unnecessary question to get their attention. So I think it's a good indication
[–][deleted] 22 points23 points24 points 3 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
I've seen posts on r/women saying the complete opposite most of the time. But this makes more sense honestly, I'm sure most people wouldn't mind being approached in the gym.
[–]futuremo 63 points64 points65 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Take anything women say about dating, especially on reddit, with a huge heap of salt
[–][deleted] 31 points32 points33 points 3 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
The first mistake is listening to what women say about dating and their feelings. They are never honest, even to themselves they're dishonest.
[–]Archyblackcat 13 points14 points15 points 3 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Yup, they say one thing and do the complete opposite.. never trust what a woman says, it’s her actions that really say the truth..
[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 3 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Yeah, but I don't think it's even malicious or intentional, they just don't know what they want or who they are
[–]Archyblackcat 0 points1 point2 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yeah it’s their nature
[–]OrzhovPalatine 132 points133 points134 points 3 years ago (23 children) | Copy Link
In your case Yes, it's basically her saying "it's ok for you to talk to me"
Girls dont approach like guys do, they generally will be indirect. At best she'll make it easy to talk her.
Dont worry though, it's easy to miss. You wouldnt be the first guy to miss the "signs".
[–]kickstandheadass 33 points34 points35 points 3 years ago (19 children) | Copy Link
I still think about the time a girl in public asked me if I could take her picture. She was with her group of friends.
I was dumb af
[–]Archyblackcat 30 points31 points32 points 3 years ago (10 children) | Copy Link
Dude one time a girl literally asked me at the mall If she can take a pic with me .. and idk how the fuck I missed that hint lmao ..
[–]LucianU 35 points36 points37 points 3 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link
You probably couldn't picture the fact that a woman could be interested in you.
[–]Archyblackcat 10 points11 points12 points 3 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
Probably but idk where I got that idea from, literally I would get called hot, cute etc by random girls while walking down the street almost every time I walked (haven’t walked since I was 17 and got a car) … even though I’ve had a lot of girls show interest but I never saw it like that back then. Just recently I started noticing when a girl is interested .. I’ve never been aware of my surroundings, always focus on my Thing but as I started to become more aware i realized I’ve been passing out on a lot of opportunities, basically every time I’m out somewhere well dressed , a random girl try’s to hit on me using an indirect approach..
[–]denimclad_secret 2 points3 points4 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yep. We all need to learn how to better observe others and our own interactions with the world. There is a lot of wisdom to gained from just slowing down and observing
[–]denimclad_secret 0 points1 point2 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]LucianU 0 points1 point2 points 3 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Did you grow up in a conservative family?
Maybe sex or talking about romantic relationships was tabu, so you considered these things as bad, something you don't want to associate with.
[–]Archyblackcat 0 points1 point2 points 3 years ago* (2 children) | Copy Link
Yeah super conservative, I felt ashamed of having a GF when I was in HS because my mom said I couldn’t have one until I graduated college..
[–]LucianU 0 points1 point2 points 3 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
It sounds like it would help you a lot to work with those beliefs, so you realize:
1) they're wrong
2) they're stopping you from having fulfilling relationships with women.
[–]Archyblackcat 1 point2 points3 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I’ve gotten over that now, but it did affect me for a while ..
[–]NotMyBestEffort 5 points6 points7 points 3 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Simply request that she send you the pic. "...heres my number."
[–]Archyblackcat 2 points3 points4 points 3 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link
That was a while back when I had zero social skills and was insecure due to the fact that I never went to a party In my teens because I was playing academy soccer so I would spend every day training with my team, had like 3 games per week and school work to do, while everyone else was partying , fucking and going on dates, drinking .. even though I had a lot of positive comments on my pictures and girls constantly Friend requesting me … I still never thought nothing of it. Just now I realized all my missed opportunities.. I always thought I was a nobody in school and recently I ran into this girl I found attractive in HS and talked to her and she told me that I was popular in HS so she was intimidated by me and she thought she had no chance lmao
[–]OrzhovPalatine 14 points15 points16 points 3 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Yep, had a girl literally take my phone, put her number in it and then took a picture of herself to assign to it. My conclusion: shes just super friendly, no way shes into me like that.
[–]denimclad_secret 6 points7 points8 points 3 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Oof
[–]OrzhovPalatine 0 points1 point2 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Indeed. Gotta learn though
[–]TerminatorReborn 5 points6 points7 points 3 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Bro you have brain damage.
Just kidding, I understand that. For the longest time I didn't think a girl could be interested in me, and that lack of confidence might blind to indicators of interest from girls.
This was very much the case at the time, what was worse though is 2 of my friends were right there and it went completely over their head too. We always joke about it nowadays.
[–]FaithInStrangers94 3 points4 points5 points 3 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Just because an opportunity presents itself doesn’t mean we need to drop what we’re doing and embrace it though. We’re you even attracted to her?
[–]OrzhovPalatine 2 points3 points4 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
At that time I had no belief in myself and had a inferiority complex. She was attractive but 25 year old me thought "no way white girls like dorky asian guys, she's just being polite"
[–][deleted] 3 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
[permanently deleted]
[–]OrzhovPalatine 0 points1 point2 points 3 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Girls aren't socialized to do it, not that complicated.
[–]Keithlct 87 points88 points89 points 3 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link
Hey bro, that is how women try to tell you that they like you by being in close proximity to you.
[–]legitusername1995 53 points54 points55 points 3 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
“Hmmm, that guy is cute, let me hang around him in close proximity so he can have a chance to talk to me”
[–][deleted] 3 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
[–]im_a_teapot_dude 2 points3 points4 points 3 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Let me explain for you:
Some women are disagreeable assholes who would rather snap at you than say hi in the gym. The most disagreeable ones, with the worst experiences with men, are the most likely to comment on this experience online.
Btw, the strategy works just fine if what you're looking for is a man that takes initiative, which is exactly what most women want. That he failed to talk to her is SUCCESS for her strategy: she ignored the wimp.
That said, while a man not being a pushover is vital, it's also vital he's not an asshole who tramples on her boundaries.
Women online are complaining about assholes who trample their boundaries, which comes from men not paying the kind of attention they need to to signals from women.
[–][deleted] 3 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]im_a_teapot_dude 0 points1 point2 points 3 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
*most women
No, women are generally agreeable, certainly more-so than men, and are socialized to be even less confrontational.
If you find they aren't, it's about 99% you're socially uncalibrated.
Again, women want this strategy to work when men have been taught to not approach and not bother women now. Lmao do you not see how backwards this is?
Yep, completely backwards, except what you don't understand is that the women are trying to tell the men who are socially uncalibrated to leave them alone, but the men the women pay so little attention to (due to being, basically, wimps) hear the message and misinterpret it, the same way you're doing.
Men also tell women "don't wear makeup", that they "don't like it" (wrong, but true if you're kind of an idiot in that if you can tell there's makeup it's probably not well done). It's the same degree of inability to understand their own behavior.
What is a signal to one woman is just something ordinary to another woman.
Kind of true, but again, this is why social calibration is required. You have to test the waters with small social gestures, observe her body language and other reactions, and then proceed only if she's open to it.
And if said signal is confused, then that woman can easily be one of the crazies that snaps at you and gets you kicked out of the gym.
How many times has this happened to you? Were you seriously actually being observant of her response and backing off if she was unhappy about you interacting with her?
And for some reason you think it's worth the risk LMAO
The risk of... having a polite conversation with the gym owner? Because I can keep my anger under control, apologize for any perceived slights and repair social relationships?
[–][deleted] 3 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]im_a_teapot_dude 0 points1 point2 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I’m sorry you’re so terrified of women. I hope you’ll overcome that at some point.
By the way, in the analogy you’re talking about with seatbelts, I’m the guy who’s saying “sure, wear your seatbelt, but you’ll probably be ok if you go for a drive”, and you’re the guy going “SEATBELTS AREN’T GOING TO SAVE YOU. IF YOU JUST WALK BY A ROAD YOU’LL PROBABLY BE RUN OVER. WE MUST AVOID CARS AT ALL COSTS.”
[–]Nirvanablue92 44 points45 points46 points 3 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
Yes they will get close to you and even turn their back to you showing they feel safe around you. Always approach from the side though.
[–]Litenpes 31 points32 points33 points 3 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I read this in David Attenborough's voice
[–]Nirvanablue92 1 point2 points3 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Mission accomplished
[–]viperex 20 points21 points22 points 3 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Are we in some nature documentary?
[–]trust_me_on_that_one 0 points1 point2 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Lol yes https://youtu.be/q8zwIphm5r4
[–]uniquan 0 points1 point2 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Ha it was hot and awkward when a gym crush did this once
[–]LucianU 21 points22 points23 points 3 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
Do they typically just make random excuses to talk to you?
That's basically it. If a woman talks to you for no apparent reason, she's likely interested.
[–]Lazy_Guest_7759 3 points4 points5 points 3 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Yes you can, man up and ask her if she wants any company over later next time.
[–]No-Emotion-7053 0 points1 point2 points 3 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Any company over? Wdym? Like want to work out together?
[–]Lazy_Guest_7759 -1 points0 points1 point 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
If a woman is giving you all of the signals being discussed in this thread you should always assume attraction. u/shortAndUglyGuy says you can't be too sure about a woman talking to you for no apparent reason.
To which I say, if a girl starts talking to you out of the blue, you caught her attention and she wants to know more about you. Shoot your shot whenever that comes up and you'll be glad you did. Even if it is a one time thing or your soulmate, but make the move.
I think a lot of guys spend to much time online and completely forget that if you are not putting "it" in a woman, she is not bonding with you. If she is not bonding with you then nature does it's thing and she will be randomly talking to the next man she finds attractive.
As someone in their late 30's I would highly encourage anyone in their early 20's to start making the most out of situations OP put out and get the girl naked. Women use sex to find love, don't let any of them convince you otherwise. If she is making you wait, it's because the guy she is currently banging has her unsure of things and is keeping you on the back burner.
[–]LucianU 0 points1 point2 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I know what you mean. Here is how you can deal with that.
Just because she's seems to be interested doesn't give you a free pass to do whatever crosses your mind. Instead, you can read it as: "hey, so far I like you. Let's explore this and see if we still like each other."
Basically, assume that she likes you, but if she clearly signals that she doesn't anymore (she refuses an invitation, she avoids you) accept that and move on. Don't insist because you think she's playing hard to get.
[–][deleted] 14 points15 points16 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yes, that is a very common action. Innocent and they can check if you are smart enough to catch such subtleties in normal social situations. If you want to confirm this, just continue conversation for a few moments. If she clings to it, there is a good chance that she likes you.
[–]motherseffinjones 7 points8 points9 points 3 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
I also struggle with this, I am good in most setting but I can’t tell at the gym. I swear this one girl keeps bending over in front of me but I’m still not sure. I also just zone out and workout, I just figure if she is outside at the same time as me I might shoot my shot 🤷🏿♂️
[–]denimclad_secret 0 points1 point2 points 3 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
...go to the juicebar, see if she follows soon after...
[–]motherseffinjones 2 points3 points4 points 3 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
My gym doesn’t have a juice bar lol
[–]denimclad_secret 2 points3 points4 points 3 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
All my game involves juicebars in one way or another....Guess I can't help you .
[–]motherseffinjones 1 point2 points3 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Lol I appreciate the attempt. At the end of the day I’ll wait for an obvious sign, I goto the gym to work with on myself not to pick up chicks
[–]big_nose_juicer 7 points8 points9 points 3 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Going to be completely honest, I wouldnt read too much into one instance. Unless a girl is making it completely obvious over multiple times you see here, the only way you'll know if someone is interested is by talking to them.
[–]denimclad_secret 3 points4 points5 points 3 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
She'll never make it overtly obvious, easy mode is generally not available to us, but repetition is definitely a good sign
Or yeah, you could talk to her....
[–]big_nose_juicer 1 point2 points3 points 3 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I'd say if they are giving cues over seeing them on several different occasions, then that is pretty obvious. I wouldn't assume interest just from one common gym interaction.
Agreed
[–]James_Cruse 18 points19 points20 points 3 years ago* (11 children) | Copy Link
Yeah, I thought this too when I was younger: Girls don’t like being approached at the gym.
Since then, every girl I’ve met outside the gym, that goes regularly, really wants to be approached at the gym and would likely date any of them, assuming they’re normal guys.
Here’s some things to keep in mind: 1. If any girl says ANYTHING to you at all at the gym, unless she works there, that’s a female approach. Girls aren’t like us - they don’t just walk up and start a conversation. We’re the confident action takes as men, they receive and react. 2. If a girl makes eye contact longer than a beat and looks one iota more than neutral on her face, she’s interested. 3. If a girl stands near you, and doesn’t really look like she’s doing much, or just absently fiddling with her phone - she’s interested.
None of these things you need to approach - judt go over there and have a fun casual conversation and soft close her about bars in the area and ask her out if she bites. If not, say you need to get back to your set and re-approach later. You’ll see her again.
[–][deleted] 3 years ago (9 children) | Copy Link
[–]James_Cruse 0 points1 point2 points 3 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Who cares if she is or isn’t - you make yourself 10x more confident and 10x more likely to date her if you just talk to her normally and stay calm and chill and have a laugh while you do.
Regardless of whether you get signals or not. What’s the worst that could happen? She just isn’t interested? Ok, so what. Everyone around you just saw you talk confidently to an attractive woman - they don’t know what was said - it just looked like you know her. Social proof - talk to more girls and they’ll be more receptive.
[–]James_Cruse 1 point2 points3 points 3 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
That is all rubbish and just a cope and excuses for you being scared of talking to a girl.
You don’t even need to be seductive, just be confident and have a fun conversation while making strong eye contact. Be calm & relaxed. Move on if she’s really giving you bad signals or says she has to go or says she has to get back to her routine. Say, “no worries, catch you later” and give her a smile and go back to your session. It’s really easy
Have fun with it, you sound so serious. Girls in the gym are so bored and highly turned on by the muscular sweaty men around them - trust me, they’ve told me. They are in a very turned up state but no-one talks to them.
I’ve never heard of ANYONE getting arrested for talking to a girl at a gym.
Talking to people is not an arrestable offence - so stop making excuses and just have a chat.
Everyone here should - even chatting just for the sake of SOCIAL PROOF - meaning other girls see you having a laugh the girl you’re talking to - other girls in the gym will think that girl knows you and likes you, how would they know differently when they see you having a fun convo?
[–]singlecellfromearth -1 points0 points1 point 3 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
other girls in the gym will think that girl knows you and likes you, how would they know differently when they see you having a fun convo?
1) If they've seen you and/or the other person before, they can tell who knows each other and who doesn't.
2) You can also kind of tell by how people interact if they know each other or not/are they flirting.
3) I don't know why Im responding at all because I pretty much agree with you. I gym a lot and I think different gyms have different cultures. As a regular it is super obvious when people are trying to flirt.
[–]James_Cruse 0 points1 point2 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
People really can’t tell if you know someone or not when speaking to them at the gym - IF you look, calm, confident and relaxed and you’re having fun. If you’re loud, and she isn’t and you’re body language looks, stiff, nervous and jerky - then ut looks like a pickup.
Because who gets nervous and jerky around their friends that they already know?
People who are relaxed and having fun look like they know each other.
[–]No-Emotion-7053 0 points1 point2 points 3 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
What’s the ‘risk’?
touch grass
[–]EladioV 6 points7 points8 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I have had the same experience a few times and even if you get the signs it doesn't mean that you would get her (at least that has been my experience) so don't feel bad for not getting the signals at the first time.
[–]uniquan 2 points3 points4 points 3 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Kind of reminds me of two girls sat next to me at the food court when there are further open seats
But no eye contact from them so it's probably nothing
[–]denimclad_secret 1 point2 points3 points 3 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Proximity in lieu of other available locations.
Hmm.
The peripheral vision of the female is typically more acute than the male.
Did you have a suspicion at the time?
[–]uniquan 2 points3 points4 points 3 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
no suspicion, I was just enjoying my boba tea
Ha, not a thing wrong with that
[–]singlecellfromearth 0 points1 point2 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Give me your choosing signals/signs/iois, approach invitations/etc list senpai!
denimclad secrets :D
[–]jeskimono 2 points3 points4 points 3 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
As a women who goes to the gym frequently. I have asked people if they’re using equipment solely because they are close to it. I want to be courteous and not just walk up right next to the person and start using it. Sometimes I choose my “spot” to set up based on proximity to mirror or weights. Never have I thought that could be taken as flirting. Now, I have made some weird faces including biting my lip while I made eye contact with a male. That’s been awkward and then I spend the rest of the session thinking “that man probably thinks I was trying to be sexy and flirtatious.” I can assure you I was not….I was itching my lip with my teeth because I don’t want to touch my face after handling gym equipment face palm
I'm sure lots of people do this. However, can you tell/do you ever see people who in your mind are trying to flirt/get someone's attention? If so, what does it look like from your perspective?
[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Damn you.
[–]Individual-Pin-9980 1 point2 points3 points 3 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
This is exactly how girls flirt under any circumstances
[–]herendzer 2 points3 points4 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Don’t take it in too much. This happens a lot. Girls are more social creatures than boys and need to make friends at the gym.
[+]Keremetter -10 points-9 points-8 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Wtf this is so pitiful to be honest.... If a woman approached me like that I would think she was not ready for life let alone meeting me.
[–]ShameAffectionate15 -1 points0 points1 point 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Have you ever heard the pick up line made popular on youtube that goes like “hey do you know the direction to…? Actually that was my opener, my name is blah blah blah”. Thats what she was doing. Good luck! Take it from me.
[+][deleted] -6 points-5 points-4 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I don't care how cute a girl is. Can drop a note under my windshield wiper or something. I'd be extremely annoyed. Like... Girl so being so fn desperate / needy. I'd prly never go back to that gym again. Cringe.
[–]epimpstyle 0 points1 point2 points 3 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
... if this is how they flirt... how women are communicating?
It looks like if they ask a question... it may be a "shit test", if they look at you - they are flirting :-))
That's pretty much my experience.
[–]HoshiarMVP 0 points1 point2 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Depends on if this keeps happening or if its one off
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 3 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I have such terrible eyesight that I literally would not be able to tell if some looked at me longer than even a second. I’m sure people think I’m stuck up. Lol
Get glasses homie! Game changer O_O
[–]Kobe_curry24 0 points1 point2 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Bruv if she likes you then talk to her if you don’t like her then don’t Lmfaoooo y’all listen to internet to much you could be missing out on your wife cause you listening to Tik tok idiots
[–]Matheusmeister 0 points1 point2 points 3 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
what a nice lady :)
[+]recyclablebanthas1 points 3 years ago [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link
1
I've been of the mindset that women generally don't like to be approached in the gym. I take lifting very seriously and tend to zone in as well so I wouldn't necessarily want to be bothered.
The reality is this: the issue is complicated and people often over-simplify it.
A lot of socially awkward guys try to approach girls anywhere, including the gym, and make it awkward.
The common response to this is easily people over simplifying and saying you just shouldn't approach at the gym.
The reality is, if you know what you're doing or can otherwise interact with people in a way that's not awkward, then you'll be fine.
If you interact with anyone, without regard for what they want during the interaction, you'll have mixed results at best.
2
I was at the gym the other day doing barbell squats and this girl set up next to the platform I was in while I went to the the restroom. When I came back she asked me if it's ok if I workout here? Even though they were so many open areas in the gym.
Unforced and unnecessary openers like this are an indication that someone has gone out of their way to interact with you.
As you say, there were plenty of open areas and she didn't need to talk to you. But she chose to.
Was she interested? Without a crystal ball there's no way to know because you didn't respond to the opener apparently by giving her anything to work with.
But you could have took what she gave you and started a conversation if you had been inclined. And from there you could have seen if she was interested.
3
My friend who was in the elliptical noticed and told me that girl was flirting with me but I think I was too stupid to notice.
It's not stupidity. It's apparently a combination of habit and possibly at least a small amount of insecurity which led you to completely discount the possibility someone would be interested in you and wanted to start a conversation.
4
I was more confused as to why she wanted to workout next to me with so much space everywhere. It was pretty late at night and the gym was somewhat empty. Had another girl ask me if I was using this barbell on the wall when I clearly had another one in my hand with weight loaded.
Same thing here: there's no way to tell for sure without a crystal ball now that the moment is passed.
The only way you could have known is by taking what you gave you and seeing if a conversation would come out of it.
The problem is that both of these girls didn't use openers that would segue into a conversation very cleanly. It's a common problem among guys as well, to not know how to open a conversation.
You would have had to put a little bit of work into it, perhaps observing something about them or the situation and commenting on it further to see if they respond positively.
Like commenting about how the place was empty, wouldn't have been that helpful, but commenting on the hour that you were both there, might have worked out pretty well. Because it would have given them an excuse to talk about something from their life like their schedule.
5
Do they typically just make random excuses to talk to you? I can never tell in the gym.
People in general make random excuses to talk to people they would want to talk to. It's a human thing.
[–]froze_gold 0 points1 point2 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Lol had this happen once too. At my gym is a single row of treadmills spread out a good couple feet from eachother, side by side. This girl was giving me eyes, got up and came right over to the treadmill next to mine and started walking.
I knew it too and didn't do shit. I mightve even sped my treadmill up as some kind of reaction to the tension.
[–]jiva_maya 0 points1 point2 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
yes
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