Escorts vs Girlfriends

2021-01-31T13:35:49+00:00

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2021-01-31T09:11:13+00:00

Well, I wouldn’t replace them directly, but in your situation I don’t see why you can’t use escorts to boost confidence and social skills while working on yourself.

Basically, you should work on self improvement like everyone else, but mess around with escorts on the side.

This_is_Vokra · 2021-01-31T08:22:32+00:00

Seems pretty pragmatic, bro. I don't think anything is wrong with paying for sex, especially if you don't want a relationship and the other party is satisfied with the amount of money you are paying them. Good on you for channeling that rage into your career instead of some other creepy way.

madfox99 · 2021-01-31T09:31:59+00:00

Yep. Use sugar babies or escorts until you get sexually experienced. Then get jacked in the gym. Then try to date once you nail down your fashion.

duhhhstonks · 2021-01-31T09:20:38+00:00

If youre gonna flash your cash to get girls, you'll still be getting escorts. They'll just be the girls that think they're not escorts. But by definition, they will be escorts.

You may not necessarily be paying for each act( I stress may) but don't think for one second those girls won't feel entitled to some form of payment.

Also, baby traps, extortion, changing their mind about consent later down the line etc are all in the cards.

Make sure you use protection either way. If you use money to get girls, those type of ladies will have been to the rodeo before.

BlackmesaTBX · 2021-01-31T10:03:01+00:00

As long as there’s no moral hang up and you won’t get thrown in jail, money is just stored energy to provide you with an experience.. go for it. I’m all for legal sex work and maximum personal freedom.

However..

I’d like to offer a counter point. I think men can do better. When you reach for easy gratification, you deprive yourself that volition to improve; to take risks, to evolve as the strong, capable, confident, competent man that is your birthright and frankly what society needs from you. This isn’t about sex - you’re willing to go a year without it. But now you have that self fulfilling story - you’re too small, too unattractive, need to pay for sex, etc.

You don’t even know what kind of beast you’d become if you just took half that energy and did small, daily improvements to your body, looks, charisma, LIVE flirtation skills, wardrobe, change competence in “manly skills”. This doesn’t require skill or confidence to get started, only practice.

There are 3.5 billion women on the planet. Many of them would be happy to have you as you are right now. You’re already the prize. But when you exude that you’re a man on the rise and you’re doing for you not to get laid, you’ll also be in the top 1% of partner prospects, not just earners.

ItsAXE93 · 2021-01-31T09:37:06+00:00

What did you work on , how did you get success earning good & healthy? I really wanna know that (I'm in early 20's)

Can you share that :)

Evol_Etah · 2021-01-31T10:43:15+00:00

As a virgin. Everyday, I dream about taking this route as I grow up.

HappyHerpes · 2021-01-31T10:45:46+00:00

Been there, done that.

Beeing with an escort is very different from the dating experience.

You get sex on every date
the sex can be really good, they are pros after all.
I suppose there might be a higher chance to get an STD, but this point feels exagerated by people who are against prostitution. I never caught anything that I know of.
You do not get that high of the first kiss. In fact, some hookers do not kiss at all.
I always sleep with her first, then do the talking afterwards. Sometimes it turns out I actually like talking to her. Sometimes the girl is annoying or boring. But I get sex either way.
they are generally not interested in a relationship with you, even tough you are having sex. This can be hard thing to wrap your head arround as an unexperienced guy.
You get to have sex with women that are optically way out of your league. And that will get you the realisation that for both sex and companionship, looks matter way less than you thought.
If you have enough money and live in a bigger city, you can fuck whoever you want to, whenever you want to. If that is something you want(and many men do), you can do that. But to me it got boring after a few years.

Andress1 · 2021-01-31T09:57:52+00:00

Why don't you go to escorts until you become very experienced and then try again with normal women?

If you have a lot of money you probably can do a lot of self improvement for yourself. Find and pay people to find and give you a different look.

paraadigmfluxx · 2021-01-31T09:08:11+00:00

I read your comments, since you don't plan on marrying someone paying for sex will be the best for you. And tbh I don't think you even need to like chase girls unlike what others said. If you're filthy rich just like you say then a little bit of money flashing would work well. You'll attract lot of girls, but then you might face performance issues. If you aren't insecure about that, go for it, have sex with new girls and never see them again. Or else pay for escorts, whatever you feel is right.

Rockfella27 · 2021-01-31T10:37:59+00:00

Go for it but use protection.

BearzBeatz · 2021-01-31T10:19:41+00:00

This makes me sad.

First of all, nothing wrong with escorts and if you aren’t having luck and need your needs met then by all means partake! Just wear a condom and don’t be a dick to her just because you are paying. Sex workers deserve respect just like anyone else. Other than that have fun, maybe you’ll boost your sexual confidence a bit and have some new experiences.

That said.... no.... escorts are not better than a girlfriend and anyone who tells you otherwise has not been in love with someone they trusted and are best friends with. Sex is a major part of a relationship but a genuine, real connection is also an irreplaceable component and you can’t get that from a sex worker.

Also, and this part might be controversial... I don’t think the women you previously slept with didn’t want to see you again because of your size. Coming from a female, they might notice size and some shallow women will bail, but unless you are working with a micro dick most women don’t care nearly as much as men think they do. My hunch is that you came off as too eager or desperate or unconfident, and maybe gave them the creeps that you were just using their body instead of connecting with them during sex and making THEM feel desired and beautiful and turned on and satisfied... which is they type of thing women actually care about when considering coming back for more, relationship or not

BlackmesaTBX · 2021-01-31T08:07:42+00:00

[permanently deleted]

dicklaurent97 · 2021-01-31T10:49:56+00:00

There’s nothing wrong with it, OP. It’s great training to feel comfortable

improve-me-coder · 2021-01-31T12:44:30+00:00

I'm a 30 year old virgin, do have the money, but don't have the confidence of actually going to an escort (even when it's legal here as well). Good luck OP, wish I had the balls to do it.

alexXx9_ · 2021-01-31T12:48:47+00:00

Why don't do both? Better of the two worlds... You'll be less needy with regular girls because you know you can have sex with 10 minutes of your work-time pay with a beautiful girl, therefore you'll even have more confidence and you'll be more attractive to regular women as well... I said multiple times to newbies to have sex with every girls they can until they are comfortable with their penis n performance, if I did that in the past and I hadn't to figure out things related to sexual insecurity I'd have had 10x more sex in my life and beautiful relationships... For me, sexual and personal insecurity regarding my abilities to make it has held me back in life so for me it's a YES but do both, don' t get lazy justb because u can have as many hookers you can but neither neglect their use case

Admirable_One6045 · 2021-01-31T08:37:57+00:00

Buy a Lamborghini, your guaranteed any girl you want.

saulisdating · 2021-01-31T11:10:09+00:00

Damn man, you’re pretty fucked in the head if you believe you need to be very attractive to date and be happy with a “normal” girl.

Your entire mindset is bad and you have some issues you really need to learn how to deal with. That’s incredibly apprent from your post and the replies I read.

Normal women DON’T CARE IF YOU DON’T LOOK LIKE A SEXY HUNK. The only thing quality women respond to is HOW YOU MAKE THEM FEEL. So you cannot be “too ugly” for normal women, by definition.

If you talk to women like real people and don’t try to impress and just focus on having fun with them, shooting the shit, teasing, flirting, joking around, being in the moment, then you will get a decent girlfriend pretty easily. I guarantee this, especially with proper guidance.

Also, you said you spent 4 years in pickup and all you have to show for it are 200 rejections and 2 lays? Then it means you "dabbled" in pickup and never really understood its purpose and haven’t actually worked on yourself at the core. Mindless aproaches aren’t pickup.

80% of pickup success is inner game. Not bar hopping, spouting lines and trying to pick up random ONS.

The point of pickup is to reprogram yourself from a loser into a person WHO WOMEN ENJOY SPENDING TIME WITH.

So here’s the very important bit: if you have some good friends and buddies who you can go and hang out with and have tons of fun and feel great with together, then you already have the skills and knowhow to be able to have tons of fun with women as well. The only difference is that you don’t want to sleep with your friends but you do want to sleep with the girls you hang out with. Which instantly puts you in a different mental state around girls and STIFLES YOU. So you don’t let your real authentic personality shine and women don’t find you attractive. And women can feel this desperation like an overbearing cheap perfume. You really gotta learn how to hang out with women.

I guarantee you that you aren’t a hopeless or a lost cause. I dunno where you’re from but I had a client from India with a similar situation and he was a total fucking mess as well, with very similar thoughts and outcomes. And with proper guidance and a few weeks of work, he got over his issues and now has tons of fuckbuddies who LIKE HIM FOR HIM and not his money. And he’ll be able to get a serious girlfriend without any issues whatsoever whenever he wants to settle down.

It breaks my heart reading stuff like this and seeing people put themselves into such ridiculous situations and feeling sorry for themselves. The only thing I can say is that you have definitely been going about this whole thing the wrong way.

Don’t give up on yourself, that’s the worst thing you can do. Re-evaluate yourself and your situation and decide what kind of man you want to be: someone who can meet lots of women and hang out with them and have fun with them and date some of them. Or someone who just has money and NOTHING ELSE to offer? The latter choice is, without mincing words, pathetic.

Good luck on your journey. And if you decide that enough is enough and that you want to get this part of your life handled once and for all, reach out to some professionals who can help you with this. Heck, even I can help you with this but I am by no means cheap.

londonrasputin · 2021-01-31T08:32:26+00:00

If you don't mind flashing the cash, you can get any girl if done properly, not just escorts.

Expand your network and throw a party often for any reason and take it from there.

slowhandz49 · 2021-01-31T09:06:03+00:00

Go the sugar daddy route

acasteco · 2021-01-31T09:29:40+00:00

I've never done it, because scorts kinda intimidates me... And also I'm poor af hahahaha. But if you want too and have the money, why not? It's like having extra classes for school, don't you think?

newguy222238 · 2021-01-31T08:52:33+00:00

If you have the money for escorts then I'd go down that route no problem.

perthanon12345 · 2021-01-31T11:41:56+00:00

For both the girls, I had sex on the third date. I spent an average 4 hours on each date, so the girls were definitely comfortable before getting into bed with me.

I was unconfident for one as she was my first. She slept with me overnight but I never saw her again.

For the second, she looked at my dick for like 10 min looking shocked. She had to guide/teach me due to being more experienced. She also slept with me overnight. I remember spending ages giving her oral and my mouth was sore, she didn’t even want to give me a BJ.

I slept with both girls in a 5 star hotel room (I like hotel rooms haha) to make the experience more enjoyable.

The second girl is still in contact with me but she plays a lot of games and is not really interested in hooking up again.

If you look in my other comments, I am tired of chasing women for minimal returns. I have never been in a relationship and tbh, I won’t find love and don’t even know if I am capable of loving someone. It is a foreign concept for me.

Navman22 · 2021-01-31T10:22:46+00:00

Would you not rather ask one of us to train you up and then pull a girl for real? Not judging the escort idea and it could be useful but from someone who’s been there... it’s not the same (just being honest)

DrBorisGobshite · 2021-01-31T11:45:25+00:00

Having read your original post and all your subsequent responses it's seems pretty clear what the issue is - you don't love yourself and you don't accept yourself for what you are.

Look at these comments:

I gave up on pickup, when I realised that I was too ugly to sleep with normal girls

I am an unattractive guy and very inexperienced sexually.

I am just too unattractive for a regular girl to fall for me and the only woman who will truely love me is my mother.

These are not the comments of a confident man, a man with high self-esteem and high self worth. They are also not the sort of things that someone would say if they are truly happy and accepting of themselves. Lastly, these are excuses you are telling yourself to explain why girls could never love you. You are protecting your own fragile ego from being hurt by having a constant pity party, and admitting defeat before you've even started.

All of the above are traits that are extremely unattractive to women. You being physically unattractive is not the issue here, you are letting that perceived fact affect you so that you are mentally and emotionally unattractive. That is the big issue.

That's not just going to be an issue with women either, that's going to be an issue that affects your entire life. You need to get over the fact that you don't look like Brad Pitt and accept yourself for who you are.

My advice to you is forget escorts and go invest your money in a psychologist or life coach. You need someone who can help you work out these mental issues so that they are no longer a lead weight on your life.

andy64392 · 2021-01-31T09:38:58+00:00

Tread with caution. Escorts only will fuck you because you’re paying them to. They don’t truly want you, and they wouldn’t consent if you asked it for free. Money is the manipulating factor that motivates their “consent”. I know a lot of people who feel empty and even worse off after. Try finding a girlfriend through dating apps or even tinder that way there’s not a transactional sex, it’s simply because you both want to fuck each other.

Fwiw, Much more fulfilling with someone you care about that cares about you as well.

90mhWXH6rr · 2021-01-31T09:21:57+00:00

escorts will give you fun but probably little social and sexual skills

perthanon12345 · 2021-01-31T09:24:15+00:00

If you’re working on improving your points, then why stunt that growth with escorts? I’m still new to this, but I’ve gathered part of the idea behind seduction is to pull women without breaking the bank. You’re may want to f*ck a woman who’s not an escort or you may want to settle down, eventually. That’s up to you. But escorts seem like a bit of a shortcut.

Keep working on yourself. Put the time and care into it and you’ll be better off, IMO.

WittyWolfy · 2021-01-31T10:14:35+00:00

Escorts might sound convenient when you've got money, but they might ruin your reputation to some point. You need someone to have emotional attachment and a healthy relation. Escorts are not your partner, they are your money's partner.

nipthagreat243 · 2021-01-31T10:58:43+00:00

you prolly don’t wanna hear this and I kno it wasn’t an option given but I think you should probably take a step back forget about women period and focus feeling better about yourself internally

wish u the best king 🙌🏼

tony8832 · 2021-01-31T12:13:13+00:00

Do it. Do not tell them you are rich. Don’t rescue them / fall in love. If you have a modest place get them to come over. Set up a camera.

Chinksta · 2021-01-31T10:53:39+00:00

" However, I have money. Tons of money. I am in my mid 20’s and earn in the top 1% of my country. "

Then why don't you just go out and approach social clubs with your lambo?

Or just go play ball covered with all Gucci $WAG?

Or just throw a private beach party and the after party is located on your boat?

How about you pay me some $$$ and I'll find you a gf.

socozyinhere · 2021-01-31T09:22:52+00:00

It's fine. They can be good to talk to and share parts of your life with. They won't help you get better at seduction, but they can provide some emotional relief.

AligatorTears · 2021-01-31T09:49:08+00:00

Escorts are fine. You don't have to use them as a stepping stone for something else. If you've got the cash then you don't need to play all the other games to get what you want. In all seriousness, there are women who will happily just hang out and play mariokart with you if you're paying by the hour. The fact that you are paying doesn't cheapen the connection, rather it is more transparent and honest.

Brighter-love · 2021-01-31T10:10:32+00:00

If you're sweet and confident in who you are, looks will never matter. Watch the movie the invention of lying.

joblagz2 · 2021-01-31T10:16:46+00:00

not the end goal but its good enough if just want to have sex. having a gf is totally different.

Boxgineer111 · 2021-01-31T10:26:04+00:00

I think since you are very very rich, you should use that money to invest in yourself. As an example off the top of my head, if I had more money I would get a hair transplant surgery and laser eye surgery right away. They are guaranteed to make me more attractive. You can hire the best fitness and dating coaches too. When it comes to escorts, I think most guys are right when it comes to gaining inital experience in sex. But later in game, it might do you harm when you are going through dry spells. You might tend to just see an escort and feel bad afterwards, instead of pushing through your dry spell. It's your life man, and I wish you happiness whatever you choose.

Stoicism1981 · 2021-01-31T10:35:30+00:00

Yes you should stick to escort at this stage of your life until you feel hollow and empty one day and wish you could have someone to love and to love you.

LifeArrow · 2021-01-31T10:52:18+00:00

You don't have a girlfriend to get laid.

ihavetenfingers · 2021-01-31T11:19:05+00:00

Sure, if you think that will make you happier, go for it.

Snip yourself or wear protection and record audio at all times to prevent baby traps and changed consent.

2021-01-31T11:22:48+00:00

[permanently deleted]

meatloafnwaffles · 2021-01-31T11:26:42+00:00

You definitely should get escorts!! They are wilder than basic women. They got tricks, some would call magic!! They’re professional, it’s very much so business. Find a good one!

DJGammaRabbit · 2021-01-31T11:51:04+00:00

This is the opposite of abundance mentality.

You’re more focused on the lack of + you put limits on yourself. Men who have sex regularly would never say something such as “I enjoy having sex once a year”, nor most of the things you’ve said. You sound more like you’re expecting too much too early.

Literally the wrong direction.

dr_batmann · 2021-01-31T12:00:23+00:00

If you have the money spend it on improving yourself. Get fit, get good fitting clothes. Make yourself so desirable that a girl wouldn’t leave you just because of bad sex. As they say you are not attractive, you are just poor.

V-god666 · 2021-01-31T12:00:46+00:00

I'm 23 and I'm still a virgin, even though it's pretty common in my country (hint hint). I also am decently well off compared to my peers, but currently not doing that well in the attractive aspect. I'm going to work on that and eventually reach the American dream lifestyle. Fingers crossed..

x_Goldensniper_x · 2021-01-31T12:05:23+00:00

If it us just for sex, yeah ok probably a good option. But for self confidence, and the feeling wining a girl you don get that with a escort, you get someone that does you a service for money.

Guys dont need to be handsome to score a girl, they just need to know their shit and be confident. The more you will use escort, the less you will have those abilities. Now it is ok to train on escort if you feel you need experience.

Just one important advice, make HPV vaccine while you can!

Uesugi_Kenshin · 2021-01-31T12:11:13+00:00

For a second I read Esports vs Girlfriends sinc eI wasn't sur which subreddit this post belonged to lol! And just fyi, go full esports brah I wanna see those dubs

heyyy-kiddo · 2021-01-31T12:33:25+00:00

Size is not a problem as you get some experience. I see no problem having some experience with professionals. Also don't take to heart what some women tell you. They magically want amazing sex when they have 0 communication about their likes and expect gus to be born for a knack for fucking.

I was there too when I was inexperienced,the woman I lost it to was lovely and thought me a lot ...i could tell she greatly enjoyed it too. She wasn't a bitch about it. She knew I was inexperienced ,but showed me the ropes and just didn't expect me to be a perfect sex partner from the get go. In the end she liked it very much even though it was my first time....that's because she took the time to tell me what she liked and how to do it better. Also we went for an entire night....we didn't rush it. Also we weren't even together ,it was a No Strings job. If you date a girl and won't even teach you on this seeing you are inexperienced just dump her. Also for men looks don't matter that much,natural looks. Women would fuck even a 2/10 like crazy if he dresses well and knows some "game". Don't give up,just don't have great expectations at first. Take it easy,i look normal,average ,but i never had any meaningfully dating experience as of yet,just some hookups. The main barrier is our look and "game"(aka how to talk ,how to captivate your interlocutor's interest and make it interesting). You need to dress well(not expensive ,but fashionable) and know how to interact with girls/women(with guys it's different....if you talk to your date like you talk to your friends you end up her friend not her boyfriend). I know this as an average guy......whether you are a 2,4,6,8 as a guy is less important....women rate is on other criteria than we rate them. Hit the gym a little and keep trying.

Redditorsheaven · 2021-01-31T12:39:52+00:00

I won’t advise. It won’t fulfill you in a long term. Get jacked and become muscular. Be on the top 10% in the terms of body attractiveness. It will give you 2 points boost. So you become 6. I’m sure you’ll find someone you like. Never give up on your journey.

Honey_and_you · 2021-01-31T12:45:31+00:00

No. Beautiful woman like men for their personality. You don’t need to resort to paying someone for love. Intelligence is very sexy to beautiful women.

2021-01-31T12:58:58+00:00

Lift
Lift
Lift
Lift

And stop being a bitch

knam_mt · 2021-01-31T13:05:52+00:00

Wow a real self-made man ! Could I ask what your country is ?

bodycount41 · 2021-01-31T13:07:28+00:00

You don’t pay for sex. You pay for them to leave.

Artrock80 · 2021-01-31T13:13:28+00:00

So how did you become wealthy so early in your career and what industry are you in?

dukesilver2 · 2021-01-31T13:22:42+00:00

This is a pretty defeatist outlook.

If you want to use a prostitute, go for it. Do it because you're horny and want sex. But don't kidd yourself into thinking that its "practice" for when you want the real thing, as some people here have said. At the end of the day, you're paying for their time. Once thay payment goes away, you are in the same spot as you are right now.

Maybe you're not successful because you consider yourself a 4/10 to begin with. There are plenty of ugly guys who get laid. Take a good look at yourself and see what you can improve. If you have the money, invest in yourself. You dont need to show off your money to get women, but you can use it to show off your value as a person.

Money is the female viagra for a lot of women. "Ugly" guys with money get laid. That's just how it works. Ugly guys with money who cant get laid must have a real problem that needs to be solved. You my friend need to some work so you view yourself as a 10/10. Good luck.

MillennialWBrain94 · 2021-01-31T13:27:51+00:00

If you do go the route of hiring an escort practice building up self esteem, confidence, social skill, and even comfortability when interacting with girls who’s seem out of your league

HavierEstello · 2021-01-31T13:31:55+00:00

Hahaha nice one mate

nicnnic · 2021-01-31T13:32:45+00:00

Men are so lucky they have this option available to them. I know can also access escorts, but the quality is a massively different and for women it’s mostly not as easy as a plug and play scenario. Sorry for the rant, it good luck in whatever you chose. I hope it works out for you.

triuzla · 2021-01-31T15:07:14+00:00

On the one hand, having sex with an unattractive male (both physically and psychologically) is acceptable for women mostly in exchange for expensive gifts, career promotion boost or hoping he will mention them in the last will.

On the other hand, if he has a bright intellect and charming personality, she can fall in love with his unique traits that truly win her heart and soul.

This needs time and dedication from both sides to grow relationship to a certain level of trust and security.

Usually, it leads to codependency and other bunch of problems further like the stress of marriage contract terms discussing, sexual dissatisfaction (if he is inexperienced in bed), depression, break up and then courts on splitting property and leaving everyone traumatized and full of negative stories proving the worst case scenarios.

Do not have illusions that you can get free sex just for the sake of sex if you are not able to convince a lady this can be somehow aligned with her current interests.

Sometimes the whole point for becoming someone's gf for a female is hoping for financial support or a place to leave unbearable social conditions around. COVID has shown how many couples had been made not on the basis of genuine human connection, but just out of a basic necessity.

OP, as far as I understood you are just looking for physical contact, not the platonic feelings, right?

Option 1: hire a sex worker (I would say use recommendations as indeed you can end up being scammed) and just release the tension without sharing any private details. Btw there are such subreddits.

*** I must admit though that escort services are different from prostitution. If a lady is not attracted to you physically, she can not be forced, as technically you are paying her for accompanying you in public places and making wow effect for your business networks mostly pretending to be your sexy date.

Option 2: go to a private sex party. It would be more safe and entertaining for realizing your intention. Pay high entry price, but get into the place where rich guys like you (you'll need an invite) come for fun, have the same goal as you and ladies attending are prepared for intercourse.

Option 3: visit a reputable bridal agency, pick up a super sexy inexperienced girl full of naive hopes from their third world database and "order" her to your house for "testing your serious relationship" for a limited time, but prepare to arrange all the doc part of arrangements. As a result you can get a potential wife if there is a spark between you or you will be smashed by cultural differences and mentality clash, though still will enjoy some time of practicing sex.

Option 4: book a holiday at e.g. Maldives and invite ladies of your preferred type to join this trip. Try e.g. invitetravel app to test this strategy.

Option 5: I would rather have recommended to establish a normal friendly connection with women in your social circle, who can value your personality and appreciate you for being you, with or without money.

Obviously, this can lead you to having a normal girlfriend with the same hobbies as you. E.g. try Couchsurfing to meet new people visiting your country in real life with more people who relate to your outlook and have common interests.

Good luck! 🌬

Escorts vs Girlfriends

Comments

Great Expectations

Title	Escorts vs Girlfriends
Author	perthanon12345
Upvotes	216
Comments	133
Date	January 31, 2021 7:52 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/l97pg7/escorts_vs_girlfriends/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/escorts-vs-girlfriends.1509182 https://theredarchive.com/post/1509182