Fear not rejection, fear not getting rejected enough

yurifca · 2020-07-28T16:03:42+00:00

I've never regreted an approach, even if it went completely terrible.

But I have a clear memory of the day I didn't try my luck with a gorgeous girl that was into me (her friend told me later) and I left empty handed and never saw her again. I will never forget that day, it was a tough lesson and still kinda hurts when I think about it.

socialanimal_us · 2020-07-28T18:52:55+00:00

“The master has failed more times than the beginner has even tried.” :)

Aily333 · 2020-07-28T17:05:22+00:00

« Girls are illogical, emotional creatures », « who cares if you’ve been rejected by a tiny, weak woman who bleeds once a month ». I get your message that being rejected is not a rejection of who you are as a human being and that’s valid even outside of dating, but some of your assertions are sexist and that’s not an attitude that will help you with girls!

Goldenpanda18 · 2020-07-28T19:21:06+00:00

You make seem like an Audition show when you talk about the 1-3 minute snippet.

Also don’t be a sexist douche, it doesn’t make you any tougher and certainly won’t help with the ladies.

ozzyb2018 · 2020-07-28T17:48:49+00:00

You started well but then veered into being sexist... Guys, go read "Models" by Mark Manson.

You don't have to be some sexist, tough guy, alpha male, or adopt that persona to meet women and have sustainable, healthy relationships...

dpjv930 · 2020-07-28T19:47:04+00:00

do you really believe girls are illogical and men are logical?? And "So does it make sense to fear the opinion of someone that is vastly weaker (10x less testosterone than you) and shorter than you and bleeds once a month? " and men as warriors and hunters versus "tiny, fragile girl." all of these statements are extremely harmful in their perpetuation of gender stereotypes and the assertion that men are stronger, bigger, more rational, SUPERIOR to women. this is false! i know men who are much weaker, shorter, more illogical than my female friends. and besides being untrue, do you really feel the need to point out girls as fragile and smaller to assert your dominance and increase your own self-esteem and handle rejection? do you need to date a woman who is smaller than you to feel strong and superior to her and in control ? do you need to feel like you are the voice of reason in order to dismiss women's thoughts, feelings, and emotions with your ironclad logic? none of these things should be necessary and these mentalities will undermine many relationships with women. i challenge you to think about your own characteristics and experiences as the basis of your self-worth rather than those of your ancestors from 30,000 years ago when we were hunter-gatherers. you can and should build yourself up without shooting down women. please try to update your thinking. i won't try to approach the topic of other gender identities because this is clearly not the space...

dambachern · 2020-07-28T18:53:30+00:00

I’m glad being a self proclaim “sexist” is working for you in getting girls. Personally, I’ve been using transparency, genuinity, and actually working on improving myself as my tactic not just for “getting girls” but for establishing actual mutual connection as well as, and this one’s important, mutual respect for and from the WOMEN I date

SpoonEver · 2020-07-28T16:51:48+00:00

TIL I do common core math

njugiste · 2020-07-28T19:30:46+00:00

And not everybody likes and wants to be rejected continuously, depending on the reason or impressions of her the ex or something else. The fear of rejection is valid.

Also why does it happen to guys only?

recyclablebanthas · 2020-08-01T13:56:25+00:00

Girls are illogical. Man’s nature is to always find logical reasoning behind everything but with emotional creatures, it’s not always possible.

Humans are illogical. Emotionally based marketing exists that targets both men and women because we're both illogical.

Men and women both think they have the monopoly on logical reasoning when they're both given to irrational behavior, depending on their maturity.

Emotional intelligence is something both men and women need to learn, and framing it as if men are just naturally logical creates a blind spot where growth needs to be happening.
If newbies buy into this idea that women are naturally irrational, then they will not hold the women they date to standards that they could be holding them to. I know plenty of people who accept really shitty flings and relationships because they assume shitty behavior is the only option.

TheGreatConst · 2020-07-28T18:07:37+00:00

If you are feeling rejected by a girl it means you are doing something wrong. The same goes for being a good salesman. When you are confident in your product you aren't getting rejected, it is the other person who lost the opportunity to get your amazing product at discounted price.

ZlatanAgrees · 2020-07-28T21:13:22+00:00

My problem is this: why i need to approach and get rejected like 100times while other/normal guys dont do it and still succeed? I find it humiliating

Crocudyle · 2020-07-28T19:37:21+00:00

Hmm there are some bits I don't completely agree with and some bits sounded a bit too theoric or objective to me. But sure rejection is a good thing and should be accepted as is.

rocacu · 2020-07-28T20:37:52+00:00

I was about to say you stole this from you know where ;) but good post Apollo!

putcoolusernamehere · 2020-07-30T00:04:46+00:00

Rejection is easy. Hell I enjoy rejection sometimes. Not approaching, or approaching and ejecting too soon are what I end up regretting.

ACLNANMV31J2G · 2020-07-30T03:22:50+00:00

Great post! I'm not in accord with everything, but some things definitely needed to be said. Men handling rejection well is a gift to man/woman relationships. As a woman, when a man, a stranger talks to me in public I'll immediately think "What does he wants? Will he react aggressively if I ignore him or say him no?" If a guy react well to rejection it tells me 2 things: 1. Not a creep. 2. Actually a normal, likeable person. If I see him again I'll be relaxed and if he's cute maybe I will ask him out. The whole "women are illogical" sounds awful but you were onto something by saying that a woman rejection is not personal. You are just a stranger or a colleague who is unexpectedly flirting. And yeah, when a woman says no, it's probably not about you. Maybe she's in a relationship or actively flirting with someone, maybe someone is sick in her family and she is stressed out and doesn't feel like dating. Maybe she's not attracted by men or you are not her type. Maybe you look like someone she doesn't like or have the same name as her brother. Attraction isn't logical. It's hormones, pheromones, moods, biology, luck, esthetic, personality, etc. I mean, we are people with our own lives. We only see a minute of you, and you only see a minute of us. But we always find each others in the end. 👍

LilyBilly19 · 2020-07-28T17:02:00+00:00

Every rejection just gets you closer to a Yes!

Chahut · 2020-07-29T06:09:21+00:00

That’s a lot of sexist nonsense. So much wrong here, yikes.

Not everyone is looking to date, not everyone is single. A no is a no, so why put up excuses as to why she might’ve rejected you? “maybe she was on her period”? do you know how ridiculous and superficial these things sound?

I’m not denying that you get some girls, but for those that have a relationship as the goal or to better themselves this is crap advice. Treating the ladies with respect and acknowledging them as intelligent, independent beings goes a long way, while calling them illogical, tiny, fragile and all that means you’ll get more rejections and those that don’t reject you most likely lack what would make a good girlfriend/wife.

shootethmyshot · 2020-07-29T10:07:24+00:00

Ignore all of the pseudo-intellectuals in the comment section, they can't discount what you say, so they attempt to undermine the truth, your post is gold and is what men need to hear.

sYesh · 2020-07-28T18:15:57+00:00

This some hardcore shit bro. I like it

mdspfvb · 2020-07-29T01:14:14+00:00

I read this as if you were Mel Gibson in braveheart giving a speech😂

donkeykong69xxx · 2020-07-29T16:58:42+00:00

True but the problem with "rejection therapy" is that it doesn't last long. When you stop doing it, the "old" paradigms switch back in (at least from what I herd). Also, I've read accounts doing a whole lot of approaches and it still seemed cringed to me. So it's like yeah one should get past the fear of approaching however there is so much more then this to getting women.

I feel like the ideal path would be to stop giving a damn about getting women. Simply forgetting about them and doing one's best to be fulfilled and excited without them. Then one would radiate the kind of energy (freedom and independence) that attracts a woman's attention. Then that guy would naturally start getting success.

The only caveat is I'm not sure it's possible to be happy and excited without getting women lol.

stock56trader · 2020-07-28T16:40:50+00:00

Great post brother

astrohans · 2020-07-28T17:21:56+00:00

this post just gave me 10L of testosterone and i liked it

Fear not rejection, fear not getting rejected enough

Comments

// I know plenty of people who accept really shitty flings and relationships because they assume shitty behavior is the only option.

Title	Fear not rejection, fear not getting rejected enough
Author	Protocol_Apollo
Upvotes	371
Comments	83
Date	July 28, 2020 3:43 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/hzgy15/fear_not_rejection_fear_not_getting_rejected/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/fear-not-rejection-fear-not-getting-rejected.1499488 https://theredarchive.com/post/1499488