What is needy behaviour?

Apprehensive-Shift71 · 2022-05-17T20:51:11+00:00

Unpopular opinion but, I feel like honesty and communication leads to a better connection. Everytime it falls I just ask myself, "would I really want someone who doesn't appreciate in my life, in the long run" and the answer is almost always no.

I've tried this while act of being non-needy and acting busy but, I feel like unless it comes from within, it'll hollow you out as a human being and make you loose touch with yourself.

KriticalKarl · 2022-05-17T20:49:07+00:00

I understand how you feel man, I went through this before I got on more purpose. The solution is to spend more time on self improvement. I know it sounds cliché but it will solve both of your issues, for one, when you are busy doing other things (working out, guitar lessons, mma, hanging with friends) you have less time to think about these things or most importantly what she’s doing. You build attraction via the date give her an experience that’s fun and memorable, then she will pursue you MORE. Over time she will begin to reach out to you more and you won’t have to worry about coming off as needy because she will be doing all the initiating.

I will note that when she does start initiating more often, don’t fall into the trap of being needy by being available all the time or talking for hours, it removes the urgency to see you. You shouldn’t have to purposely ignore her you should be busy anyways bro. You will feel more confident and fulfilled when you are busy, and you will be naturally more attractive to her because you are confident.

Also don’t worry about “losing her”, no one has raised a woman’s attraction long term by texting and talking all day, I’m sure you’ve been there which is why you are trying to improve. Women’s attraction grows in space, think about it. Even if she is texting another guy right now, chances are that he’s not even aware of female nature and start showing neediness via text. When her attraction drops because she is surrounded by orbiters she will think “hmmm I wonder what u/Da_SnowLeopard is up to”. Trust me bro It works time and time again, you have to stand out from other men.

GlitteringPause8 · 2022-05-18T01:35:46+00:00

this is why i hate dating lol everyone is playing games to see who cares the least (guilty of it myself).

If you want a FWB, then keep doing what you are doing. If you are actually interested in her, then you need to be texting her more to talk to her, get to know her, ask her out on actual dates, and just be yourself. If you want to text all day, do it. If she thinks that's needy or annoying, then she's not the one for you. You'll tell pretty quickly on how she replies if shes into it...is she reciprocating your energy or is she being vague and short. It'll be easy to tell.

intelectualycurious · 2022-05-18T03:46:24+00:00

Realizing that food and water is the only thing you need to survive. Holding onto anything else as if your life depended on it is needy behavior.

One way around needy behavior is to focus on your vision. Imagine how you’d like things to play out and then only accept things in your reality that conform to your vision.

One way Steve Jobs made decision was by asking the simple question “is this going to move my vision forward?” If the answer was yes, he would engage. If the answer to moving your vision forward is no, you might want to reimagine your behaviors.

froze_gold · 2022-05-18T01:55:08+00:00

Demanding too much time from her. Becoming emotional over the lack of time they can share with you. Giving too much attention unwarranted.

CompetitionFair7686 · 2022-05-18T00:08:05+00:00

You should not show a girl that you care unless she is already your girlfriend. If she is not your girlfriend, then you should be mysterious, and keep the intrigue and let her doubdt where she stands with you. You dont wanna be an open book.

Neo-Rio · 2022-05-18T02:04:15+00:00

This is going to be a really long-winded answer to your question, because it covers so many things.

Basically, it all really depends if you want a relationship.

Personally, I think you should be trying to avoid these - unless you're at a stage in your life when you are wanting to commit to having a family and children. For most guys on this subreddit I really don't think many of you are at that stage in your life - and probably won't be until you hit 35-40 or thereabouts - if ever.

Women intrinsically seek security and since sex for them involves children - they usually press guys for commitment. This is despite the fact that they don't really want it any more than you do but having that commitment means at least an invested party in children. If they can't find the commitment in the sex partner, then they will seek it out in a cuck to provide for her. By that point they may already be pregnant with the initial sex partner's child, but now it's the cuck's "baby" if you see where I'm going with this.

Now... if you're playing this straight - you're using protection, so she's not going to get kids. That's great except for the fact that her body can't tell the difference once you've done it. She starts thinking that she's pregnant (her body has been fooled by contraception) and will start behaving accordingly. Human instinct can't process contraception it would seem. If you do ejaculate in her without protection, I hope you have an escape plan to leave the country so that whatever legal system you are under can't really touch you and come looking for you for support payments. Additionally you shouldn't have given the mother your real name. This is so she puts an alias as the name of the father on a birth certificate. I don't want to get into an ethics discussion on this. This is just to legally cover yourself in case she can't find a cuck in record time or have one already lined up in the wings. As IANAL I trust that you will do the right thing and just use protection.

Here's where things fall off the rails with women you've had sex with:- by persisting in repeated sex and not giving her the commitment she desires, she's going start with the "what are we?" questions and accuse you of using her for sex. This is ridiculous because she's using you for a relationship by having repeated sex with you, and some women simply aim to get pregnant to force the marriage issue ("It's your baby"! guilt tripping hysteria). But the point is that YOU HAVE ALREADY DONE YOUR BIOLOGICAL JOB through having sex. She now has to either get a commitment from you, or QUICKLY find some other guy to raise your "baby".

This is why you want to avoid leading women on by "spinning plates" or "kicking the can down the road" on a relationship. It's just best to lay it out in no uncertain terms that you don't want to commit to her, be the one to look after her baby, or have a relationship. You do this by not engaging in relationship behaviours (no dinner dates, going out, moving in with her, etc), and simply restricting her to allowing her to booty call you whenever she wants.

Yes, she will likely move on to other guys - but this is just incentive for you to move on as well and meet other women. That is, if you want to maintain any sense of personal freedom in your life, because committing to marriage is a MASSIVE loss of financial and personal freedom that you can't escape without taking a lot of damage.

That's just how it has to be - that is, if you want to be completely ethical about the whole business.

Ikem32 · 2022-05-17T22:13:57+00:00

You care way too much what she thinks.

Romantic_Adventurer · 2022-05-17T21:07:58+00:00

always be testing, use the 3 magic questions.

https://youtu.be/_WpG4j-o9L0

TheTruth221 · 2022-05-17T23:20:10+00:00

having to text alot

7Birdies · 2022-05-18T00:08:12+00:00

This vid helped me with this question a lot. You may like it!

https://youtu.be/vWy3C38U7Lw

incognito3107 · 2022-05-18T07:54:30+00:00

Neediness occurs when you are too emotionally addicted and can't adjust to current dynamic of your relation. When you are too much in your head, feeding yourself with illusive thoughts and emotions, instead of paying attention to reality.

Title	What is needy behaviour?
Author	Da_SnowLeopard
Upvotes	17
Comments	19
Date	May 17, 2022 8:19 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/urvd94/what_is_needy_behaviour/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/what-is-needy-behaviour.1259368 https://theredarchive.com/post/1259368

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