i basically work with all men. i am the only woman in meetings most of the time. normally i feel pretty respected. however, last week one the the men i work with (partner/owner/rainmaker) told a pretty dirty joke in our meeting. i was kind of surprised, as were some of the other men in the meeting. we all awkwardly laughed, and it was uncomfortable. i don't usually see this side of him.

i have dealt with uncomfortable behavior from other men at work, and when i vent to friends they always say to tell HR. Ummmm...yeah, ok, no. in my experience, they are not there to help.

so my question is: women who work with men, or women in STEM in particular, how do you handle these situations? do you think they are doing this specifically to make you, the sole female, uncomfortable? or are they so selfish that they don't give a F you are there and may be offended? (this where i am leaning, doesn't make it ok).

how do you handle these situations and the politics that come with? anyone have experience reporting to HR and how it went?

EDIT: mods i know you do the lord's word, but i kind of wish i could read the comments that have been filtered...i can see partial replies via email and they seem legit? but y'all know best. much love. <3