my ex just got her first boyfriend... 3 months out

SpiritualEnema · 2021-10-19T15:32:36+00:00

Don’t dwell on it. Spend your time making yourself into the best version possible. She is probably just terrified to be alone and has no identity outside of whatever relationship she is in. That is her personal fault and not yours. Don’t internalize her bullshit

derelictherds · 2021-10-19T20:23:20+00:00

She probably had the BF long before the marriage ended. The pattern is almost cookie cutter and the excuses are always the same. Your best bet is to focus on you and to completely cut her out of your life. If these so-called friends insist on keeping you in the loop, then it's time to cut these shit bags out too.

sicrm · 2021-10-19T16:02:12+00:00

tell your “friends” you don’t want to updates on her.

hearing shit like that isn’t helpful at all.

find ways to keep yourself busy (going to the gym, picking up a hobby and joining a club/class).

then when you have the time/means, pick somewhere you either always wanted to visit or haven’t been to in a while, spend a few days there to clear your head.

Gxl4 · 2021-10-19T17:36:33+00:00

Get over her by doing the stuff you like and get better as a man. Chase excellence and spin plates if you like. Lift and eat healthy and/or do some combat/self defence sports to get the bloodflow going.

She left mentally already 6months prior to actually bouncing the boat, and the chance is that you only just found out.. Tldr of the i need space talk wumeng give : https://pics.me.me/i-need-space-i-need-space-i-need-space-i-15042445.png

Ghimel · 2021-10-19T23:20:11+00:00

Mine waited 6 days. Same excuses. And I mean exactly. the. same.

steelgripphoenix · 2021-10-19T23:46:52+00:00

needs to know what it's like to be independent.

She said she didn't want a man. She wanted to live alone and take care of herself, not have to worry about anyone.

That stuff is always code for sleeping with many different men. Stop worrying about it though. Even if you got back together with her, you wouldn't want her after all this. I highly doubt anyone else will want her for anything but sex either.

skaelee · 2021-10-19T16:47:49+00:00

1: women never leave a relationship to “ find myself “ or “be independent “ anytime a women says that too you just translate it too “I’m ready to be a hoe “ you telling me a mf can’t find themselves while in a committed relationship ? This statement from women is actually more common than you think go too YouTube and search “the redpill “ or “coach Greg adams “ you won’t regret this information

2: women are never happy so don’t beat yourself if you can’t achieve this task look at will smith and other celebrities marriages these hoes have the riches husbands and get taken care of and still say “I’m not happy “ if fucken will smith can’t make a bitch happy what makes you think us regular guys can ?

3: if a women tells you she wants to be alone or by herself just laugh 😂 women are social creatures they can’t be alone like men they need to be in somebody’s face they crave and seek attention and validation

kapriece · 2021-10-19T18:55:03+00:00

I feel for you brother. YOU DID NOTHING WRONG in this case. However you were gaslit with her garbage excuse to go off and ride the CC(cock carousel) if you're new here. Women tend to do this influenced by media, friends, and even family that they're missing out by being married. You'll learn about the shit show called a hoe phase and hot girl summer. Just excuses they deem good enough to wreck their homes to ride random cock. I was there once. I thought I was the problem but I learned it was all her. Like the previous poster said. Focus on yourself and become a better version of yourself. It may not seem like it but your life will get better before hers does. Men's lives improve over time. If that other relationship fails it's a hard sell to buy a woman with another man's kids. Whereas you can find better looking women who will treat you better. Just don't get married twice. Look around TikTok and YouTube and you'll see hundreds of videos of single moms mad that men are winning.

inept4dept · 2021-10-19T21:31:55+00:00

Try not to think about it, let it go. My ex was on match two days after i served her papers, used the joint credit card, doesn't help to worry about it, focus on what you're doing for you.

Pale-Butterscotch-16 · 2021-10-20T04:48:10+00:00

She didn't leave you. God took her out of your life because she wasn't a good woman. You deserve so much better! Go have the best life ever...best revenge!!

ProchinaMarxist · 2021-10-19T22:54:29+00:00

She wants to ride the sausage Rollercoaster,, she belongs to the streets brother.

Nothing to understand, there aren't deep ideas in women, by nature they are superficial and vain. Like children.

She knew she could do better cause there are a lot of thirsty simps

ZarBandit · 2021-10-20T00:23:41+00:00

As others have said, she really just wanted to sleep around. Chances are she either monkeybranched and cheated or was getting interest and left so she could try and snag some strange.

This is so common it is practically a cliché.

The thing to understand is she probably can’t distinguish between interest from hawt guys trying to bang her and relationship offers. She remembers being young and having plenty of suitors and thinks she can still convert those showing interest (NSA sex) to a commitment.

The only variable here is how many times she gets pumped and dumped before she realizes maybe her hand isn’t as strong as she thought.

Then comes the realization of consequences. She can’t even do as well as she had with you. Oh SHiiiiT!

Then she hightails it back to you ASAFP. She’s so, so, sorry, you both had something special and it just took time apart (dick farming and an STD or two) for her to realize what’s truly in her heart. Cue a tear falling down her cheek.

Bullshit. Don’t fall for it. This is not love, it’s fear. Pure FOMO. You’re plan B. And she’ll resent having to stay with you if you let her return.

If you have a younger and prettier GF around this time and look like you’re living well, that will really hurt her. It’s one thing for her to be miserable. But if you’re happier than she is, that will really sting. If you want to truly and deeply make her sorry for bailing on you, that’s how to do it.

pegleg_legal · 2021-10-20T01:38:39+00:00

They rarely want to be independent. If you find one that actually does, amazing.

RoeChereau · 2021-10-20T02:09:07+00:00

Don't feel bad. Her boyfriend is just that, a boyfriend. She will soon learn that society is not set up for a single woman with kids and most men don't want to marry a woman with kids who left her ex because she was "bored". Move on, she has. But she'll still call on you to take care of household repairs, keep her safe etc, and she'll use the kids as leverage. She'll soon find out there's slim pickins for divorced single women with kids.

jimsmythee · 2021-10-19T17:19:04+00:00

Don't dwell on it. People lie, ok? They tell you what you want to hear.

"It's not you, it's me." "I need time away to work on myself and live alone." They're all lies.

People live in the now.

If you met a nice girl and started dating her, you would feel much better about the situation.

Rough-Area4765 · 2021-10-20T02:11:39+00:00

Watch CoachGregAdams on YouTube and study up on his marriage wheel diagram.

She was never yours, it was just your turn. She belongs to the streets.

Man up and move on.

akihonj · 2021-10-19T21:30:00+00:00

Yeah it feels like a kick in the nuts, don't spend too much time thinking about it if you can. Try to focus on you, what you need and want out of life.

She's gone and doing her own thing, you don't owe her and she doesn't owe you, if things go good for her so be it, if they go bad for her, so be it she made her bed, best you can do is make yours.

wrigleyharbor · 2021-10-20T14:08:38+00:00

Yeah it’s hard when someone moves on before you do. Ultimately people don’t want to be alone even though they say they do. Just try your best to work out (endorphins work man they really do) and try not to think about the whys of it all

Jbr74 · 2021-10-21T18:06:18+00:00

Consider yourself lucky, most still get a boyfriend while you are living in the same house.

letak2018 · 2021-10-19T16:15:59+00:00

None of your business.

Title	my ex just got her first boyfriend... 3 months out
Author	im2old_4this
Upvotes	14
Comments	26
Date	October 19, 2021 3:20 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/qbdpuu/my_ex_just_got_her_first_boyfriend_3_months_out/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/my-ex-just-got-her-first-boyfriend-3-months-out.1078632 https://theredarchive.com/post/1078632

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