Last post I made here was about going on a date with a woman... she just dumped me

17throwaway-scorpio · 2024-02-04T23:25:52+00:00

Sorry to hear! That freaking sucks!

I would hope she elaborates more about what the podcast indicated that she made an association with.

Why couldn't she do it face-to-face? Something else seems wrong like she's hiding something greater. Anyway, it might be a blessing in disguise.

I hope you have support IRL.

DivorceRecoveryMen · 2024-02-03T17:28:59+00:00

You did win. She eventually showed her true colors. 14 months is not enough time to really learn about someone. As you saw. Keep realistic expectations with the next one. And there will be another. You don't date for another wife, you date to have fun and do things with people. Don't make the same mistake three times!

Ncfc48 · 2024-02-03T11:22:43+00:00

Gutted for you mate but I'm like a lot of us I have no interest in basing step dad or blending my son in some other family I keep both things separate and always will Fun time separate from sun time But good luck anyway mate

warrior_up · 2024-02-03T00:14:08+00:00

Stop dating single moms bro, you’ll never be important easily disposable

Interesting-Doctor-5 · 2024-02-02T19:30:18+00:00

Hey man! If you met her, you will meet others. Keep your head up, buddy!

Classic_Dill · 2024-02-02T18:51:18+00:00

Sooo, where do people think he was co dependent? they were together 14 months, well over a year, she also I'm sure made a decision to meet his family and travel with him, that's a relationship and he didnt seem to be leaning on her at all, now meeting the family after a year is wrong? LOL come on.

Truth time? she couldn't handle a family unit, she didnt have the energy or moxy to be with a man with children, she could have been cheating, to drop him that quick and that coldly? that sounds like a monkey branching cheater.

im2old_4this · 2024-02-02T15:51:21+00:00

Thank you all so much for the responses. I'm trying to get to every one of them but just know I appreciate all of you for taking a minute to talk to a guy you don't otherwise know.. You're All good people. I'm glad I found this community

Captinofthelostniggs · 2024-02-02T14:07:17+00:00

Your hope for love is going to bury you quickly. She left because you were too dependent on her. Learn how to be alone first, and stop relying on love.

Classic-Ad8157 · 2024-02-02T12:37:02+00:00

They are emotionally unstable, fickle creatures. Once you see them for what they are, then you can interact with them correctly.

As mentioned above, she was never yours, it was just your turn. Modern day women will listen to anyone that plays to their emotions and feelings and give them validation. Podcasts allow them to immerse themselves with crappy advice by unqualified people. A serial killer could make a podcast about relationships and women would tune in if they liked the message.

Tarsarian · 2024-02-02T12:06:22+00:00

She did you a favor! Better to cut now and not be in another divorce.

woahbrad35 · 2024-02-02T11:43:54+00:00

That's the dumbest breakup line. This isn't a you problem outside all the red flags you probably missed. Date more, worry less about finding the next wife. This feels like you are still raw from the divorce and are trying to find someone that fills that void. 14 months? It's a year long relationship, not a baby. A year is nothing at our age. You know what I did after my divorce? Dated someone new every week to every couple months for about 2 years. I gained a lot of perspective on dating and women in that time. Don't introduce them to your kids right away either, that's not good for the kids, and the whole instant family can spook women off. They don't see a single guy with kids the same way guys look at single women with kids. Being alone is also OK and until you make peace with that, you will struggle.

lifeisallihave · 2024-02-02T05:54:44+00:00

Could it be that you got too attached or were moving in too soon? I feel your pain when life seems to be going your way and this happens. It's normal to feel angry and disappointed but I feel the most for your kids, try to manage their emotions so they are ok.

This is kind of my fear, allowing a potential future partner to meet my kids. Ihe thought of that just scares. I think I will do that in year three of a new relationship and not sooner.

Be safe man.

the-don-carlo · 2024-02-02T04:54:54+00:00

Women didn’t stick around anymore. Why bother trying. Hit & quit The podcast story is probably bullshit, she prob got some new D.
Lesson learnt

Masypha · 2024-02-02T04:23:22+00:00

First, this sucks and I'm sorry you're feeling so down.

Second, we have 2 wolves in us, light & dark. Whichever one we feed will rise.

Meaning, learn how not to feel sorry for yourself. Don't contact her any more. Read some books, workout, and move on in life. The more sorry you feel the worse it'll be. Find the positives and move forward. None of this is easy to do when you're not in the right headspace. However, one step at a time in the right direction will have you progress.

Also, she's only human. Maybe that podcast has her going back to her ex or so, better to rip the band aide off now than later.

Elle_Bee__ · 2024-02-02T03:57:38+00:00

You guys together 14 months and she listens to a podcast and text-breaks up with you? Jesus Christ. I hope she doesn’t run into some kind of cult cuz she suggestible af.

Saucypanda208 · 2024-02-02T03:50:11+00:00

Sorry that happened man… I know the feeling it’s happened to me to maybe people like us are destined to be alone everyone iv ever let close to me has abandoned me at some point…

Academic_Mistake_751 · 2024-02-02T03:19:07+00:00

This is exactly why I dated girls in their 20’s for the past several years. And I found the right one, finally , after 16 months and I’m gonna marry her, with a prenup, of course. The women our age have just as much or more drama than these older, sometimes broken women.

My lady will NEVER grow old she’s 24 and I’ve got a 25 year fun ride ahead. Yes I’m starting over kind of, but it’s a hell of a lot better with a sexy hot girlfriend then my crusty STBXW, who has rubber lips, fake tits, and has grown neurotic over the years.

It’s hard man, but this is a blessing in disguise.

upvotersfortruth · 2024-02-02T01:51:14+00:00

That’s pretty rough, bro. Have you gone no contact?

Feinixaway · 2024-02-02T01:19:28+00:00

Being alone isn't bad. There is no stigma.

I was dating this girl and she wanted to meet my son after a year. I was super protective of him so I said I wasn't ready and I ended up things there.

I go on dates, meet girls and have fun but I don't want my son to be involved in it.

stent00 · 2024-02-02T00:39:42+00:00

You can be like me and totally give up on women.... I have no faith in women what so ever. Every woman has left me in my life except my mom....here's to mom's! Being alone is Less painful then playing the relationship game. No punnany ever but that's ok. All I need is a quiet home and good kids in my life.

rjm101 · 2024-02-02T00:29:54+00:00

I don't think we can let ourselves get too emotionally involved to the modern woman these days. Go into this with the expectation of failure. Assume they are going to let you down and if they don't then it's a pleasant surprise I guess. I think part of the anger comes from all the effort and investment people put into relationships. Dial that back so that it's not as painfull. It's more work anyway.

Plenty-Entertainer71 · 2024-02-02T00:06:42+00:00

So did she want u to propose to her or what?

Physical-Pie748 · 2024-02-02T00:02:31+00:00

you give women and dating too much of an importance. it doesnt really matter at the end of the day. you came alone on this world, and you will leave it alone.

dont expect women to be together with you forever ,enjoy dating her, but be prepared that she will leave at any moment. she can do whatever she wants, you dont own her.

someone already said it, but everything is temporary

Careless_Payment9298 · 2024-02-02T00:01:23+00:00

After my divorce, I waited a year to date anyone. Then my first three "relationships" only lasting around 5-6 months. I just couldn't connect with any of them. It felt like I had lost something important, and I doubted if I'd ever find it again. Then, I met a really great lady. I started developing feelings for her, but a small argument destroyed that. Discouraged, I resumed dating, and the same pattern repeated six months later.
By then, it had been almost four years since my divorce. I decided to go on a date without expecting much. I was indifferent and just wanted to have fun. On our first date, I told her that I wasn't looking for a serious relationship. Surprisingly, now, almost a year later, we are living together. She's amazing, and despite the love I had for my ex, I wouldn't trade what I have now for what I had before.

Old-Macaroon8148 · 2024-02-01T23:54:48+00:00

Taken down by a podcast. Thats a new one.

MonarchistExtreme · 2024-02-01T23:39:10+00:00

Very sorry to hear that but at least she spared you a long, slow, toxic goodbye. In time you may be thankful for that.

whoisgodiam · 2024-02-01T23:36:15+00:00

Dude, you have a poverty mindset. Get an abundance mindset and get a stable of 20 year olds on rotation.

OkEmphasis5923 · 2024-02-01T22:58:48+00:00

She's not yours, its just your turn. Live by those words bro.

Long term relationships and marriage take a lot of noble qualities like commitment, empathy, forgiveness, self awareness, persistence, positivity, and on and on. Its a very very rare person who has all that.

Most gals (and a lot of guys) can't see past the tingles and when that's gone, they're gone.

DCnative2020 · 2024-02-01T22:55:28+00:00

the first and second breakups after divorce is tough. i have been through 4 breakups post divorce. you need to stop chasing her and convincing her telling her she won't find this type of love again because its verging on manipulative behavior.

you won't be alone forever, more will come along just give it a few months. and next time no need to move so fast 14 months meeting family, kids, taking trips to bali, thats a lot in just over 1 year

she probably was like wtf slow down this is moving too fast. it comes off as desperation.

iSurvivedltd · 2024-02-01T22:52:08+00:00

Sorry you are going through this bro.

Lesson here is not to get too wrapped up in a woman. Thats the second one.

Just date and have sex. No need for this love shit. As men, we end up getting burned cause clearly we love differently than them.

Stay strong, you'll get through this

RedWineStrat · 2024-02-01T22:33:39+00:00

Did you ask her to elaborate? "Dumped him because of a podcast" really has me wondering. I'm not saying people don't have light bulbs go off when listening to media, but I'd personally be sending a "hold up" for a breather before nuking something that is working out.

Classic_Dill · 2024-02-02T18:47:28+00:00

Does she have children? did she ever hint at you paying most of the bills?

She either got into toxic modern feminism or decided you couldn't pay her way. What else would it be? did she ever complain you weren't giving her equal energy?

Interesting-Doctor-5 · 2024-02-02T19:30:09+00:00

Hey man! If you met her, you will meet others. Keep your head up, buddy!

Interesting-Doctor-5 · 2024-02-02T19:30:09+00:00

Hey man! If you met her, you will meet others. Keep your head up, buddy!

Dabyberson · 2024-02-12T07:23:32+00:00

Maybe if you didn’t do so much drugs a sensible lady would actually want to be with you. I mean your a grown man bragging about how drugs you can do without having a bad trip on reddit of alll places lol. Seriously what sensible woman would read your posts and be like wow i want to be with this man…. Lmao seriously i dont know one sensible woman that would find that “cool”

Title	Last post I made here was about going on a date with a woman... she just dumped me
Author	im2old_4this
Upvotes	58
Comments	97
Date	February 1, 2024 10:25 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1agniow/last_post_i_made_here_was_about_going_on_a_date/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/last-post-i-made-here-was-about-going-on-a-date.1244378 https://theredarchive.com/post/1244378

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