A week ago, She left and took my 2y/o autistic son and filed a no contact/restraining or against Me and moved into her moms. She hasn’t filed for divorce yet, what does that mean?

dday_throwaway3 · 2023-02-07T21:51:31+00:00

It means she's being coached by other divorced hens to maximize her leverage in divorce. Filing a TRO against you is the first step.

You need to get in front of the TRO and get it dismissed, otherwise it will overshadow your entire divorce and not in a good way.

Stop waiting on her to make the next move, and retain a family law attorney. Today. Allowing her to establish status quo where you are not in the picture is going to make custody an uphill battle for you.

Here's how to find an attorney: https://forum.mensdivorce.com/viewtopic.php?t=13377

Grand-Expression-493 · 2023-02-07T22:53:30+00:00

It means she is gonna body slam you out of the water with the divorce claim if you don't file first.

It also means she has done all this for a long time, bought time, maybe even banged you while planning to stab you in the back. She had full intentions of this for atleast 6 months.

2ndChance_1stMistake · 2023-02-07T21:32:03+00:00

It means she’s been planning this for about a year.

playerknowmore · 2023-02-07T21:37:24+00:00

It means she is listening to her lawyer. Get your lawyer today.

silmarp · 2023-02-07T22:36:19+00:00

That means you have to file before her.

Don't break the RO. In fact go nc. She's fishing for your action. In case you break the RO(like most men do) she will effectively take you to the cleaners. Go to your lawyer yesterday and file for divorce. Don't wait for her to file because she is using strategy against you so don't expect her to stop until she destroys you like many other women did.

The reason is simple. You can't contact her. But that doesn't mean you can't file. If you wait for her to file she is gonna take it to court and she will cry abuse and use all her tricks to destroy you. The first trick is to bait you into breaking the RO due to nervousness so don't do it.

In fact. If she file she will be the first to talk in court. The moment you let her talk first is game over because she will complain and complain and you will lose everything down to your very pants.

ijustdontcare74 · 2023-02-07T21:49:40+00:00

It means you have a long, hard and expensive fight ahead of you.

2023-02-07T23:38:51+00:00

The advice I got here was that my legal dollars were best spent fighting the RO. I think that's good advice because if not you are on your back foot the entire divorce.

IDK why but my STBX told me she was going to file a RO, and my lawyer pushed me to get my temporary motions, divorce classes, and financial declarations done. His logic was that going through the legal process for custody shows there is no emergency, and makes it look like your STBX is using this well-played card to gain custody. He called this tactic the poor woman's divorce.

Read here long enough and you're going to find plenty of fathers who got kicked out or moved out, waited a while, and are now fighting an uphill battle to get custody. Your kid is more important than anything else, show the court that you are a father and act fast.

Small_Quarter_3673 · 2023-02-07T21:47:54+00:00

There is always someone else

Obviously212 · 2023-02-08T00:28:00+00:00

That was the prelude to my divorce. I came back from work and was no longer allowed into my home or allowed to have contact with my son who was suffering bad health during those days. He was 3 years old.

In my case I had recently got her her a new phone and the old one was sitting around and I got a look into it. She was planning for divorce 8 months prior and Protection Orders was what was advised to get the upper hand.

She checked out of that marriage a long time ago.

captainchippsixx · 2023-02-07T22:49:51+00:00

Means you should file for divorce and emergency contact with your child. Change the locks on the house

polarshred · 2023-02-08T02:04:40+00:00

Man, women can be so fucking cruel.

CommanderOfCheese45 · 2023-02-08T19:32:42+00:00

She hasn't filed because she's looking to either establish you as an abuser if you break the TRO, or as abandoning the child if you follow the TRO.

Beautiful-Reason-594 · 2023-02-07T21:58:29+00:00

Is there a reason other than the cost, why she would be waiting for me to file? We live in different cities. I can’t imagine she would be willing to travel for court. Even though she took the car.

Beautiful-Reason-594 · 2023-02-07T21:59:38+00:00

I don’t have the money to pay for both the no contact hearing AND the divorce though.

Beautiful-Reason-594 · 2023-02-10T15:58:56+00:00

She got a continuance : I think it’s because she saw my 2’ high stack of evidence

Seemedlikefun · 2023-02-08T19:56:07+00:00

So you've been sitting for a week with a RO hanging over your head with no attorney? WTF!

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