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[–]SortaKindaWoulda 52 points53 points54 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I get where you're coming from and that you're feeling hopeless. It's been over 2 years since I hooked up. But over the last year, I worked on NMMNG, building brotherhood, and getting out. Yesterday, I worked up the courage to kiss a girl in 2 years.
I'm an average looking dude and yet, sometimes when I out myself I see that some women seem interested in me. The thing is, they were interested before, I just hadn't noticed them and given them a chance. Maybe it'll take another while before I have sex again, but I'm happy to take baby steps.
May you take little steps each day and move toward your highest aim
[–]RecycledMatrix 10 points11 points12 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
If you're an average looking dude, average inner game won't do.
[–]ProdiLemaj 44 points45 points46 points 4 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
The dating market is rough out here for average men, but it is what it is. All you can do is try to get your money up, hit the gym, dress nice, and most importantly, actually put yourself out there and approach women. All this looking at statistics and feeling sorry for yourself is pointless. Average guys pull girls too, I see it all the time.
[–]15jorada 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
All this looking at statistics and feeling sorry for yourself is pointless
Thank you! People use Statistics to throw themselves a collective pity party all the time and it is annoying. If it was 30% harder for short guys to get woman than taller guys, then if you are short you are exactly in the same situation that you have always been. The only thing that changes is now you know that you might have to do more than a tall guy would, boohoo. What's the alternative?
[–]purplemindstate 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Exactly
[–]b_a_d_r0b0t 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
No
[–]Revolutionary_Wind_8 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Sounds to me like the girls made their move and now its our turn (;
@OP please read this comment. You can do this.
[–]PaleontologistNo2785 50 points51 points52 points 4 years ago (39 children) | Copy Link
If youre average looking just approach a lot. Problem solved.
[–][deleted] 17 points18 points19 points 4 years ago (35 children) | Copy Link
and then you suddenly have several hundred rejections under your belt.
[–]PaleontologistNo2785 41 points42 points43 points 4 years ago (34 children) | Copy Link
Rejections are a part of the game man.
[–][deleted] 10 points11 points12 points 4 years ago (33 children) | Copy Link
oh I totally understand, However, you would hope or expect to get some success, however small, after a few hundred attempts.
[–]originalgainster 13 points14 points15 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
you approached hundreds of girls with no success?
[–]semxlr5 6 points7 points8 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
It sounds like he’s doing something right by approaching and something wrong by not saying the right thing.
[–]BobbyHillLookinAzz -1 points0 points1 point 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Or more likely what he said didn’t matter, but rather how he said it was wrong
[–][deleted] 7 points8 points9 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yeah, its pretty easy to get that number. Like today I got rejected 4 or 5 times. I was skiing and ski lifts are a great low risk zone, chat about skiing, get to know each other, offer to show her a route on the way back down...
[–]surfershane25 4 points5 points6 points 4 years ago (27 children) | Copy Link
What do you mean however? You should absolutely expect greater than one success after hundreds of approaches or you need to seriously look at yourself and what you’re doing wrong, seek some therapy, take some classes, read some books on the matter ba use no ones success rate should be that low.
[–][deleted] 4 points5 points6 points 4 years ago (19 children) | Copy Link
Well, girls openly flirt with me from time to time, everything can be going well up to the point I make a move at which point, she says she doesnt see me that way, depsite approaching me first and initiating the conversaion.
Ive tried everything, being direct, taking things slow, focusing on myself with no intention of dating, putting myself out there. Everything has been tried it seems. Yet its the same thing, all rejections.
[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (18 children) | Copy Link
Went through your history and you seem extremely needy. Women can smell that miles away.
[–][deleted] -2 points-1 points0 points 4 years ago (17 children) | Copy Link
OK I will give up that aspect of myself. Any other things I should change? I am super outdoorsy (like wake up at 1 am to climb a mountain), Is that also something that I should change in order to attract girls?
[–]surfershane25 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (16 children) | Copy Link
You’re willingness to change that(climbing) about you screams neediness, you’d give up your passion for them… we aren’t trying to be mean, but that’s a helpful think to know about yourself if you’re asking what to improve.
Edit the climbing part not the neediness part.
[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (15 children) | Copy Link
I see what your saying, but I have tried being myself for years. Girls dont like who I currently am. At this point I ache with loneliness that I am willing to try anything to become someone who can pique the interest of any girl. Yes, that Includes changing the fundamentals of who I am. I havent touched a girl in 8 months and it was 8 years before that.
I have tried giving up and doing what I want for several years, but that didnt work. At this point I have lost all standards and still strike out everytime.
edit. I am 100% happy and content with who I am, I just feel that I need something to change.
[–]PaleontologistNo2785 -3 points-2 points-1 points 4 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
Or u could just be ugle
[–]surfershane25 -1 points0 points1 point 4 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
Nah I have ugly friends that are funny and charming enough that they pull chicks, there’s way more than looks that get you laid.
[–]PaleontologistNo2785 -1 points0 points1 point 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
I know man im ugly af and still gotten results
[–]surfershane25 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Well there ya go, hopefully the rest of the sub that’s convinced that’s a deal breaker sees this.
[–]PaleontologistNo2785 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Its not a deal breaker but it can really make things hard if youre really ugly
[–][deleted] -1 points0 points1 point 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
So you're saying any guy regardless of Looks & Height can get any girl?
[–]surfershane25 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Nope, I’m saying being ugly does not prevent you from getting women or men depending on your gender and sexual preference, don’t put words in other peoples mouths thank you.
[–]18cmOfGreatness 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
On average you'll sleep with at least 1-2 women out of 100 if you are an average dude who just started cold approaching. If you can't get any success after hundreds of attempts then you are doing something seriously wrong. First of all, start setting up a date from the get go instead of just taking the number.
[–]MrSaturdayRight -3 points-2 points-1 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
It doesn’t matter what you look like. What matters is how much money you have
[–]b_a_d_r0b0t 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
No, not solved. Are you a woman?
[–]PaleontologistNo2785 -1 points0 points1 point 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
No😂
[–][deleted] 57 points58 points59 points 4 years ago (28 children) | Copy Link
Think about it this way. You also have like a trillion percent more access, and you also have WAY less competition.
Go out, have fun, be confident, smash pussy, you fucking king.
[–]TheRealMe54321 19 points20 points21 points 4 years ago (17 children) | Copy Link
How is there less competition?
[–]PuroPincheGains 31 points32 points33 points 4 years ago (16 children) | Copy Link
Because you're here learning how to socialize with women instead of walking up to girls saying, "ay bby u got a bf." You are learning and not just shitposting, right?
[–][deleted] 7 points8 points9 points 4 years ago (14 children) | Copy Link
And less men are getting laid today than they were a decade ago.
[–][deleted] 13 points14 points15 points 4 years ago (12 children) | Copy Link
thats probably attributable to online dating and social media.
its not just women becoming more shallow, its the fact that social media has reduced the need to socialize in-person, and apps are shallow
[–]Exmerus 9 points10 points11 points 4 years ago (11 children) | Copy Link
Social media has raised women expectations. Why settle with an average Joe if they can wait for the handsome rich guys they see all the time online?
[–][deleted] 8 points9 points10 points 4 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
its not just
And most of those girls end up getting played anyways because the guy just wants a quick fuck and guys with that many options wouldn't think twice about discarding her.
It's crazy to think that some fat mediocre girl, is dating rich, handsome chads. If those guys give her time of day, its for sex and nothing more.
[–]Exmerus 7 points8 points9 points 4 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
Of course. But the fact that they are looking for them rich chads instead of settling in their league is what is fucking average guys in the ass.
[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Yeah, being average sucks nowadays. All I can really say is, work on yourself and try to become as good-looking as possible.
I must admit, it's pretty funny when I go on a sub like /r/dating_advice and you hear about women who claim they can't find any guys who don't want hookups. There are plenty of mediocre men who don't want hookups. They just don't want to date mediocre men.
That being said, this post gives me strong incel vibes, and seems to be shirking responsibility somewhat. Women are shallow, yes, but at some point you have to take responsibility for your own life, because that's not changing.
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
The problem is similar to absolute poverty vs relative poverty. Women don't care about the absolute value of a man, it's all about relative value. Any average man today has higher quality of life than almost any man hundred years ago. If women care about absolute value of a man, any average man wouldn't have any problem getting laid.
It's all about relative value. That's where online dating comes in. Similar to globalization, online dating merges a lot of local markets into one single giant global market. Before online dating an avg, girl doesn't have much chance to meet a millionaire, let alone fuck them or date them. So the girl has to go for what she has in her lane - an avg. guy.
Because of online dating an avg girl can meet not only one millionaire, she can meet a whole batch of them. So why would she settle for less? She's also playing numbers game in her head. Maybe one of the millionares would be in relationship with her.
Moreover it's a very materialistic status obsessed culture. So every girl is trying to maximize her social status by dating someone higher on the ladder. In addition to gold-digging we need another phrase like ladder-climbing for situation like this.
[–]SeniorChampionship13 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
See I agree that it’s telling of your character and morality if that’s the type of woman you are, but realistically who are we to tell women who they can and can’t go for?
[–]goodfella_de_niro 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
there is documentary on Netflix called the social dilemma, there a guy told that social media is making kids more socially introverted. Girls and boys both.
Yeah, that guy will sleep with you but will not marry you. That’s why there is a rise in crazy cat ladies
[–]18cmOfGreatness 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Because the handsome rich guy won't marry her and definitely won't take care of her children. He's just going to fuck her like a toy and then find someone new. For this reason smart women don't sleep around.
[–]Exmerus 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Women think they can change them, make them fall in love and live happily ever after.
[–]PuroPincheGains 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Then get good
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
youre implying that nobody is trying
[–][deleted] 3 points4 points5 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
young men in US are having sex 3x less than they were a decade ago. That statistic does nothing but imply less access. No part of that leads to the conclusion that there is more access.
[–]TheLegendofMikeHawk 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Church.
[–]b_a_d_r0b0t 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link
So trillion chance of getting rejected
[–][deleted] -1 points0 points1 point 4 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
Absolutely. You might get rejected 42,000 times if you are super picky but all it takes is finding the woman you really want once.
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
But isn't this sub more about getting laid a lot more than getting one girl to find you attractive and be done with it for rest of your life?
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
It is i think. I am just trying to get these guys to relax. They are way to pessimistic about this shit, its not that hard.
I know some guys go quantity, but i am way more into quality. How hot is she? How much of a freak is she? Thats the stuff i look for.
Yeah but you said all one need is that one girl to like you implying just one in a lifetime while most guy here on sub will themselves prefer quality over quantity but still they'll like to have more than one options in a lifetime.
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I dont mean one forever dude, i just mean the next one.
Oh so you were saying that lack of looks might make rejections far more likely but keep persisting , success will ensue?
You missed my point. He will get rejected even if he has no standards. Also the girls he likes will reject him. The one will never say yes. 100% rejection for average guy. Like not even single mothers of 5 kids.
[–]File-Complex 18 points19 points20 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Start injecting testosterone and become a chad
Lol
[–]ZombieFiesta 13 points14 points15 points 4 years ago* (8 children) | Copy Link
Without looking into this data more and where it comes from . IMO it comes down to women will always be the pickers and choosers. What I mean by that is woman have to constantly screen men to weed out the ones that are only there to objectify and exploit them sexually or even worse the ones that will assault or murder them upon rejection. Women are always going to have sex available to them because they will always have a plethora of suitors to choose from (good ones, bad ones, and down right terrible ones). Unfortunately most men do not experience this. I would bet most “Chads” (as this sub refers to) still have less options then even an average looking woman. The main reason the “Chad’s” get the action is because they take their shot. They get rejected too though. They don’t just show up and every woman throws themselves at them in some hypnotic trance.
I will let you all in on a little secret though. THE BAR IS SOOOOO LOW right now guys you have no idea. I promise if you do these few things that you will have success eventually:
Show interest (I like you, I have a crush on you, I want to take you out sometime)
Get vulnerable/share your feelings (I’m not great at dating/saying the right things always so apologies if I’m a little awkward at times, I get nervous around pretty girls)
a)Communicate effectively (Whats the best way and time to get a hold of you/these are the days I’m available/ this is what I want to do, are you interested in that)
3b. Show an interest in her life, really get to know her and listen/remember for god sakes!! Too many guys talk about themselves too much to try to overly impress due to being insecure, They totally forget to find out what she’s about. Trust me if she’s interested in you, you will have your chance to talk about yourself, she WILL ask!
Follow through on commitments/promises (don’t be late/stick to date agreements/if you fuck up own it and try not to continue that behavior)
Ask for consent and if she gives it keep moving it forward and ask for more consent later (can I hug you, can I kiss you, I want to have sex with you, do you want to have sex with me?) typically this will be progressed over X number of dates but all steps can also take place in a single evening with the right connection.
The “Chads” get the girl because the girl primarily gets approached by the chads and then ends up picking the least chady of the chads. Promise, most girls are not looking for a self involved, toxically masculine, cocky, disrespectful man child that’s going to fuck her then never talk to her again. And if she is, you probably don’t want to be with that girl anyway.
You’re going to get rejected it’s inevitable, it just means that person wasn’t the one. I understand not wanting to be “the creepy guy” but I feel like this fear has gotten irrationally extreme since the “me too” movement but you’re not going to get sued or arrested for simply asking a girl out. So this is not a valid excuse to not approach women. Just don’t be a perv and keep your hands to yourself. If she says “no” take it on the chin throw a “have a good day” at her and move on. I’d rather try and fail then not try at all and wonder what could have been.
If you’re super terrified about cold approaching then join a social group that will have the opposite gender there and frequent it (volleyball, hiking, yoga, gym class, dancing class). You’ll have to play the long game but eventually you’ll start seeing familiar faces and then it’s not a cold approach anymore.
And remember gentleman. Believe in yourself and know your value. Why should she be interested in you? What do you bring to the table? What are your intentions? What makes you a good guy and why? If you can’t answer these question for yourself then you need to work on yourself more and identify your own value before you even think about trying to bring a woman into your life. This is a completely different topic that we’ll save for another day but no woman is gonna see value in you if you don’t even see it in yourself. Woman want a partner not a child they need to instill confidence in.
[–]JacobMoogberg69 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
You are close but you get some things extremely wrong. A top quality guy is always going to have more options available to him than even the most attractive women. It's not just shooting your shot. There just aren't enough arousing men to go around for every pretty girl out there.
You hear women say this all the time "I haven't gotten laid in months, I can't meet a guy" and you look at them and think, "if I were a girl and as good looking as her, I would be able to get laid on the street every time I walk out of my apartment".
The thing is, you can get get laid this way as a male too. Just go outside and scream that you will have sex with anyone who wants to have you and I am sure that at least a few people will step up. Sure, they will mostly be homely looking dudes, but you can get laid easily, just not by who you really want. Well it's the same for women. If every average woman truly had the choice of fucking the hottest of the hot Chads, then all of you might as well just kill yourselves. But thats not how it works in reality.
The reality is women are not the choosers and selectors. You are imbuing them with that power. You believe that they are the all mighty deciders of male worth. You choose to hand your balls over to them. The reason most guys struggle with getting sex and intimacy is because they don't honk very highly of themselves and women are wired to go for men they believe feel worthy of themselves. That's why you can see a hot girl go out with some guy and think "what does she see in him, he's such an asshole". What she sees in him is that this asshole feels good about himself and thinks of himself highly, which is not some muting that average man do and incels can't even imagined what it feels like to think welll of yourself. That's really the secret. It's as simple ad that.
So if there is a guy with high self esteem than he'll get any girl he want regardless of his Looks & Height?
[–]JacobMoogberg69 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Not any girl but enough girls to keep him happy for the rest of his life. Inwill also add that as long as you feel something is wrong with you, so will women. So whatever your excuse of the day is.
Attractive or mostly average?
[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Good advice, bro! I’ve always wanted to take dancing or yoga classes. Where’s the best place to take those types of classes?
[–]ZombieFiesta 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Yoga is the shit man. Just got into seriously over the last few months. Got tired of not being able to tie my shoes without feeling like I was about to pull something 🤣. And the guy to girl ratio is incredible! Honestly most gyms that have any group classes will almost always have some sort of yoga class. If you live in a metro area I can almost guarantee there is a studio within 10-15 miles of your place, these memberships can get kind of spendy sometimes though.
As far as dance look up salsa/bachata classes near me again most metro areas will have some sort of Latin dance club which will host a class at least once a week typically free a lot of times too!
I can’t stress enough though. DO NOT GO TO THESE FUNCTIONS PLANNING TO HIT ON/ASK WOMEN OUT YOUR FIRST VISIT. If it happens organically great! But that should not be your plan A, you’ll get a rep real quick and then they will all avoid you like the plague. Go there to learn and enjoy the class and be the best student possible.
There’s also the “meet up” app. Just download form the google/apple store and you’ll find a bunch of local, and mostly free, public and regular meet up groups.
Thanks for the insight bro. You’re a lifesaver. I wanna learn hip hop dance but cannot find a place that teaches it.
[–]stanthemilkman88 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yeah don't get vulnerable and share your feelings. This is horrible advise. Anxiety is a Good thing itbbreed sexual tension. Don't just straight up tell her you like her, kills it. I never comment on her looks, everyone does that. It's So common. No such thing as toxic masculinity. There is just masculinity and feminity, they both have their dark side.
100% agree about average looking women having more options than majority of good looking dudes. Level of abundance that we'll never know. Disparate sex drives between men and women being a main factor of this.
Asking to hug or kiss or fuck?? Awful advice. Mood killer. you should be able to tell from subtext body language, that she is responding in a positive way to how you're interacting with you. You should just "get it". I've never asked.
Agree with the interest in her. Best way to carry a conversation, people love talking about themselves. Just don't make it an interview.
Yeah me too fear is a bit exaggerated. Still avoid anyone I work with. I like not being poor.
And last part is true.
[–]LookingForCumpany 3 points4 points5 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
It's overrated anyway, man. Don't put too much value on it. I know it's depressing but thinking about what you don't have is depressing. Do cool shit that you couldn't do otherwise. That makes up for it for me. Like working on a hobby you like that would otherwise be time consumed by the significant other. That way it's more like a trade than a loss.
[–]b_a_d_r0b0t 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Best advice
[–]shaggy2gay -1 points0 points1 point 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
pussy is underrated
[–]LookingForCumpany 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
pussy expires, son. value plummets faster than my new mercedes.
[–]burncushlikewood 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yea I agree women have it easy when it comes to dating. This is why the manosphere was invented, to empower men in tough times. I suggest doing some reading and infield approaches, that's what we as men have is the ability to see a woman and immediately approach her, it's not that women don't approach men, it just doesn't happen as often. Get off of tinder and approach some real women, when you have game it will create an abundance of females in your life.
[–]westsan 4 points5 points6 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
It means only the alphas are balling. Just like in the monkey cage 🐒
[–]Imaginary-Chipmunk35 5 points6 points7 points 4 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
Hit in gym
[–]powerthrowacc 8 points9 points10 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
HIIT?
[–]Imaginary-Chipmunk35 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yup
In the face
[–]Yanksfan28gg 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I do
I mean, if you hit the gym your life would change.
[–]eriverside 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Step 1: realize that women, all of them, are real people with their own will, agency, interests, goals, dreams...
Step 2: realize that no one owes you sex. You don't need sex. You want it.
Step 3: Meet people for the sake of meeting people with similar interests. Doesn't matter if its men or women as long as you enjoy their company. This will help you grow as a person. In the process, you'll meet women you actually respect, or will get set up on dates by new friends who don't think you're total creep.
Step 3 works as long as you remember step 1 and 2.
[–]aidsjohnson 6 points7 points8 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
If you're average looking you just gotta try and become one of the ones who gets laid. Personally, I've never gotten pussy without paying for it, but one of my New Years resolutions is to work on that and fix it. Good luck, king.
[–]RedditTipiak 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Same here. Any other dude into "not buying sex anymore in 2022 (or buying less)"?
[–]BrownThunderMK 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
volsel brigade unite!
[–]aidsjohnson 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Exactly, that's my New Years resolution lmfao!
[–]originalgainster 5 points6 points7 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Source of that stat?
maybe we were just born at the wrong time, maybe this just isn’t the time period for young average looking guys to experience the pleasures of intimacy/dating.
maybe. or maybe you go out and socialize more.
[–]Silent-Service-5075 3 points4 points5 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
How or where to go socialize then when almost everywhere is being restricted or closed due to covid?
[–]RedditTipiak 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Parks, beaches, open forests, jogging areas, open public areas - yeah, I know, it's winter. You bring a book or an activity, you don't go out to hit directly, that's counter-productive and annoying for the ladies. Adopt or borrow a dog if needed (yeah, I know, money and logistics - but dogs are the best ice breaker ever). I do have a personal trick: I bring bird seeds and feed birds. Just make sure it's seeds that will attract something other than damn pigeons or seagull.
[–]willgo-waggins 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Sorry but some of us while not young anymore have certainly not changed our sexual habits.
So the women are simply sleeping g lire with older guys.
I can tell you why also. It comes directly from a much younger (and two others now as well as my older ones) FWB. She prefers guys that are older - and generally older than forty. I’m 51 and not the oldest guy she’s been with. She says (and again I have heard now multiple variants) that those guys under forty or so are just worthless. No respect. A lot of the time no job or place or vehicle (important where I am). And they generally are into things that she is not. And crazy thing is she is a lifelong athlete and outdoors person. And the last thing is that the sex sucks. Two pump chumps and ED problems.
[–]shaggy2gay 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
stats are for nerds, do cold approach
[–]RPslimjim 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Don’t worry about men as a whole. Worry about yourself. Improve yourself. Worrying about the lack of pussy most men get does nothing for you getting pussy.
Fact of the matter is most guys on this sub are ugly, fat, and not accomplished. A girl shouldn’t like them. Men have to become and women just are. Men are not loved unconditionally. Get with the fucking program and improve yourself.
I’m getting sick and fucking tired of the little bitches on her crying when they cold approach (which is dead btw) but they live at home with mom, have shit hygiene and are overweight or skinny fat.
Literally the formula is simple. Work on yourself, improve your look. Just being in shape will improve your look you don’t have to be jacked but a Michael Phelps swimmer body will make you look much better. Play with haircuts, facial hair, and well fitting clothes. It’s not that fucking hard.
PUT IN THE FUCKING WORK.
[–]HatchimalSam 4 points5 points6 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Even if somehow the implications of these stats are true, it’s not like the world is practicing polygamy today. It’s not like each great, good-looking guy has 10 wives.
Women are still available. Even if they don’t wanna hook up with you at a club, they’re still fully date-able. IMO at least...
That means nothing to OP as they will not date him. All girls go for the top 5% guys. They are happy to share him rather than get the ring from average guy.
Do you want to be in a relationship with someone, who has spent 10 years trying to bad chads and now settling for you? I am not going to be in a relationship to be someone else's consolation prize.
[–]devnasty009 9 points10 points11 points 4 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link
I think I can actually answer this. Porn causes severe sexual problems for young men - ESPECIALLY when they start jerking it before having real sex. While the women may also be watching porn, it’s not affecting them in the same capacity therefore they are still able to bang dudes with no problems.
[–]PanZwu 21 points22 points23 points 4 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
it's more a tinder(OLD) / social media problem
[–]Yanksfan28gg 23 points24 points25 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
combination of all of it imo, social media, tinder and porn. none of it has served any purpose but to have a negative impact on the young men of today
[–]RedditTipiak 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Also, society in general. Presumably, young men have less true social status to project; women are less looking for husbands and fathers; meaningless is on the rise for everyone - so boy toys with status signalling get the prize, but the prize is meaningless sex, where both partners do it as default meaning.
Do I make sense? Do you guys agree?
[–]Monty_Booourns 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
You make sense.
[–]devnasty009 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
How is it those reasons? I understand how tinder devalues men as people (if you are an average looking guy).
[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
All of the above. Porn, Social media and capitalism has destroyed our brains....
[–]SithLordJediMaster 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Recent study that says porn causes ED is false lol
[–]eriverside 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
No one is talking ED. Its about your state of mind and perception of women and sex.
[–]cool1-- 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Chad always wins. PUA is cope
[–]blue_barracuda 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Wow. There's a lot to unpack here.
First off, what a crock of shit. This is a FANTASTIC time to date given that a lot of women loathe online dating, and they're chomping at the bit to meet a man in person.
Second, why would girls want you? Are you attractive? Are you fit? Do you have hobbies? A good job? Emotionally balanced? Assertive? Seriously, so you don't get boy scout points for just being alive.
Third, and most importantly - WOMEN ARE NOT FUCKING OBJECTS. They will date and fuck the highest value person that they can - just like guys do!
A defeatist attitude will get you nowhere. If you came here just the bitch and moan, this isn't the sub for you. This is a sub for people who actually want to improve their dating lives.
[–]SeniorChampionship13 -1 points0 points1 point 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
All I took from this is that you don’t know how to read
[–]b_a_d_r0b0t -1 points0 points1 point 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yeah just be handsome, tall and rich. So easy.
Leave the US if you can.
As an immigrant in North America, I've noticed it's an extremely materialistic status obsessed culture. I wonder to what extent women are begging for Chads phenomenon is true in Europe.
Honestly, great advice.
[–]Blackmagician 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Less competition if you’re one of the ones who don’t give up. If you’re a teen or early 20s it probably seems hopeless but it becomes much easier as you age and work on yourself.
Giving up now just means you’re fucking yourself over in the present and giving up on future you.
[–]Alphaojo 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
There’s hope because they come to your house for the online version of you and leave with a cream pie from the real you
[–]solstone109 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
By getting on with your life and not worrying about it 😴
[–]Yanksfan28gg 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
yea did that for a long time didn’t do me any good
You must be a woman
[–]solstone109 -1 points0 points1 point 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Cope
[–]Rairaijin 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Let me quote a pregnant feminist real quick,"I need to know the baby's sex to know if either I keep it or it's an abortion" how can men date if women are turning misandrist and androcidal for fear of our loins being castrated entirely
[+]Mrcopeland25 -11 points-10 points-9 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
stop feeling like you are entitled to a women first off. no woman ever fell for the wo is me incel crap. Realistically, try to better yourself every day even how you socialize with women. i guarantee you it will be hard and you may get frustrated but you will achieve your goals if you work towards them and are accepting of criticism and can adapt. women want to have wec you just have to model yourself after someone that is confident and sexy.
[–]comtruise223456 4 points5 points6 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
nobody buys this crap anymore
That’s the thing, there isn’t.
[–]Pinchematt 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Don't worry, I don't plan on being around forever and the odds will get better then.
[–]Goku-m 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
You’re not suppose to believe there’s any hope, you’re not suppose to even hope. That’s a losers mentality, you’re suppose to try with varying degrees of methods until you see success.
If you believe that and embody that then you're right, it is not going to happen. You need to break into the sexually desirable categories. Go to the gym, become pro social, have an interesting life and try.
Hope is not a strategy. There is no soul mate.
[–]jackzander 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Citation needed.
It's good to assure yourself that the data you worry about is real, so let's do that first.
[–]18cmOfGreatness 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (9 children) | Copy Link
Do you realize that this is mathematically impossible for men to have less sex than women, right? Unless 2/3 of sex women have is lesbian sex, which is not.
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link
Or maybe most are having with same guy?
[–]18cmOfGreatness 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link
And? An average is going to be the same. Statistically if 1 guy fucked 50 women and 99 men fucked 50 women, an average is still going to be one woman per one man. It always was the case that the best guys get more sex than an average dude.
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
But this ain't average, it's about percentage of men between 18-30 age where haven't had sex in past year and that comes around 30% of men so that means more women are having sex with select few men.
Here 2/3rd ain't having sex among themselves but those select few men are getting more opportunities with these women.
Why are you brining in average when here we are talking about how 30% of men have been celibate for past year?
[–]18cmOfGreatness 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
The post was deleted so I haven't seen what data he was talking about. I commented only based on the post's title and this comment in particular. As about more men being celibate, it's kind of expected with Covid. Meeting people IRL is harder than ever and online dating favors looks above anything else. Though if this statistics actually don't show decrease in sexual partners among women then it shouldn't be considered seriously. After all in the past 2 years people are having less sex overall, for reasons I think should be obvious enough.
Nope the data was taken from 2018-19 . It was a comparative study where they compared the data from year 2008-09 and female celibacy showed an increase of I guess 3-4% while increase in male celibacy showed staggering 12%.
[–]18cmOfGreatness 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
It's not that big of a difference, all things considered. It would be strange if men, who are supposed to be the ones who actually TAKE ACTION have more issues than women, who just need to exist and filter among those who approach them. More and more men just give up on dating.
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago* (2 children) | Copy Link
Well maybe more men are giving up cause it's getting hard to get a dates?
Also 12% is huge considering America have population over 100 millions in that age bracket and even half are men then that's pretty staggering amount of men, basically one third of the men are celibate so one in every three guy out there reported celibacy and also generally men are more likely to lie in this regard so the reported study could very well be understating the true figure.
It's not the same but there was also another study floating around but this was from UK and among college students.
New Data from the Telegraph indicate that levels of sexlessness among young men are still steadily increasing, just 34% of male University students report being sexually active while studying at University and 43% report never having had sex.
https://mobile.twitter.com/Telegraph/status/1387795532786147335
Only 11% of all the respondents claim to be celibate by choice, assuming that 11% of all men are celibate by choice, that means that a staggering 55% of male university students in the UK admit to being involuntarily celibate.
Interestingly 47% of women report being sexually active while studying at university.
Further, if you break this down by numbers, there were 2.38 million students studying in the UK from 2018-2019. About 1.36 million females, and 1.02 million males attending university in the UK between 2018-2019. If you then figure in the sexually active statistics, that would make for about 640,000 sexually active females, and 350,000 sexually active males.
And college is generally supposed to be peak of all the hedonistic indulgence, so it's kinda mind boggling with so many young men with so many young women together in same place both mentally and physically and yet twice the number of women are sexually active. Again this is from 2018-19 so no covid scare. Also it's pretty much generally agreed upon that most women remain celibate by choice so I won't be shocked if those girls deciding to be celibate by personal choice cause they aren't getting boys they desire.
[–]18cmOfGreatness 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago* (1 child) | Copy Link
I hope that you realize that the ratio of genetic parentage was 1 male to 10 females around 10k years ago. I.e. 1/10 of men had children with 9/10 of women. Now, it's only 1 to 2, according to your sources and only if we consider casual sex itself. Well duh, Sherlock, the minority of men have a lot of partners while most struggle. It's just what expected evolutionary. This statistic is different if you consider only long-term relationships though. Pretty much all men at some point are going to get a gf. The problem is, there's a high chance that this gf will have had way more sexual partners than her bf. The thing is, if you want to have casual sex as a man you need to work on yourself, to be in the top either in looks or charisma. On the other hand, in most countries prostitution is either legal or semi-legal (i.e. it's legal to hire a hooker but illegal to be a pimp) so if it's just sex with hotties you want, it can range anywhere from 50$ to 500$ depending on the country. Or you can do sex tourism, western men have it rather easy in most less developed countries.
Yup, I was only pointing out to your very first comment in this trail where you questioned the validity of the claim that higher number of men are sexless than women and dare I say most women are sexless by choice cause their biology makes them more picky (nothing wrong with that) and unlike men way less likely to lower their standards for casual sex even with long period of celibacy, with relationship it's different cause they do re-evaluate their checklist as older they go to start a family but if she's not in hurry then, pheeww she'll be as picky and maybe more picky now.
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