What do other girls think when they see you approach?

Delicious_Ad_1853 · 2024-02-13T17:05:25+00:00

Pretend for a minute that your fears are true. Pretending that approaching one woman immediately soured every other woman in the room. You have no choice but to leave immediately afterwards.

In that case, you opened 1 woman.

If you let your fears stop you, on the other hand, you'll open 0 women, with 0% chance of ever getting anywhere.

Which course is better?

bert_cj · 2024-02-13T18:06:57+00:00

Fk em. You’re a man. A man should never be ashamed for pursuing a woman, it’s what keeps the human population going

Remandergrowth · 2024-02-13T18:11:32+00:00

There are so many girls that even if you fail with 1000 of them, you still have a good chance of meeting a good fit. Assuming you live in a city, there could be thousands of women near you.
Think of it as training for the right one. The right girl needs you to have these skills to find her so every failure helps you find the right person.
Make sure to form strong morals around what you do. It is easy to recover from rejection if you believe you did nothing wrong. Many men have been conditioned to feel guilty for trying to approach women. Don't feel guilty. You meant no harm and did no harm.

mrstat88 · 2024-02-13T21:45:12+00:00

I’ve done ~1,100 cold approaches

Most of the time nobody really cares (spotlight effect). I remember a few other times when I was with a wing, approached a girl, and a couple walked by and heard me open her and give the compliment, and then after the set my wing told me “dude the girl in that couple heard you and she told her boyfriend ‘omg that was so great of him to do, nobody does that anymore!’”

So there you go

Jolly-Jaguar8664 · 2024-02-13T16:41:01+00:00

Become more social in general, talk to girls, who you are not romantically interested in, also talk to guys. Then approaching becomes a more normal thing for yourself and also for other people seeing you doing it.

TRTGymBro · 2024-02-13T16:49:20+00:00

Trying to think about what others are thinking or what the woman you are approaching is thinking is absolutely the worst thing you can do. It will not fix your fear it will make it worse.

AnAIAteMyBaby · 2024-02-13T17:58:45+00:00

I assume you're talking about a bar or club due to worrying about others seeing, I would start by having chats with girls that have absolutely no intention of going anywhere.

If your AA is super bad start super simple. When you're out just ask girls you like where the cloak room is, or if they have the time etc. just get into the habit of talking to girls you like and slowly make the conversations longer.

No_Plan8250 · 2024-02-13T19:14:36+00:00

Spotlight bias - no-one cares. You really need to put in the work to be seen as "that guy".

Kitchen-Historian371 · 2024-02-13T20:04:22+00:00

Hey man I just wanna let u know I’m doing this shit too and these things cross my mind. I understand now that these are truly mountains we see, which will become mole hills given just a bit more experience. Slowly you’ll see these are regular people who appear as mystical to you, just keep approaching, don’t force and just keep an open mind to slowly stretching your comfort zone little by little

CharmingRejector · 2024-02-14T04:30:55+00:00

After doing many thousands of approaches I can tell you first hand that other girls never care.

Her friends will care, though, and perhaps want to join in the conversation. But if you can handle that, then it's really just a good thing. From the outside world, or from bystanders, it looks like you're just a very cool and social guy, which is very high value and thus attractive.

Moreover, if you stand alone and brood in a corner, this is when women will write you off as a creepy loser. So, really, you gotta approach unless you want to be viewed as this weirdo.

Leo7S · 2024-02-14T06:26:36+00:00

I guess with enough exp talking to new people you get an idea which types of people like you and who dont and who are more open and approachable and who is more closed. Asians and Indians are more closed people so you'd expect them to reciprocate less. Just try to pick the types who you had past good responses

nascash098 · 2024-02-13T20:22:13+00:00

Usually u go for 1 the rest follow.

1keentolearn12 · 2024-02-13T20:35:39+00:00

If you have value, it adds even more value

EmbeddedAssets · 2024-02-14T01:56:45+00:00

You’re asking the wrong question if you’re talking about a cold approach scenario. You gotta do it and get blown the fuck out. Ive had women yell at me that I scared them, ive even approached a 16 year old (by accident) pretty close to police. Those are way potentially worse outcomes than approaching and getting rejected. You have to be willing to face that too if youre ever going to get good at cold approach.

Kagenikakushiteru · 2024-02-14T05:18:25+00:00

They know you’re interested, probably a bit flattered and what to see what you want to do.

If you’re an ugly bastard and they’re in a group someone will undoubted say ewwww and straight away no one would want to engage with you because that’s face losing stuff in front of their friends

ThrowRa_565657 · 2024-02-14T10:09:56+00:00

Depends in what environment you approach.

If you're likely to never see them again? -> why you worry? Even if you fail, no harm done; they'll likely forget about you in a few days.

If you're likely to see them in a different context (aka from hobbies, work, school ) -> don't approach with the intent of dating someone / romantical. Just make multiple short-approaches with a group with intent of having fun and enjoying yourself (but not being friends). This'll signal high value (and that you aren't a sexual predator - because women these days are indoctrinated by feminism to believe that all men are essentially sexual deviant cavemen). So when you meet them next time, they'll see you are 1. fun to be around 2. aren't looking just for sex.

Keep in mind, girls POV: they want to be approached, especially in their group, because it gives them SMV + they love the power they have to reject someone.

This is why if you 1. dont approach them directly or 2. don't care if you're rejected, you negate all their strategy, and you get inside their head.

Iamtheallison · 2024-02-14T15:14:25+00:00

As a woman, I barely notice if a man approaches a woman—I only notice if itms creepy or aggressive because women will send out a distress signal.

The best way is to say hello and see if they are interested in talking. Most men I have seen do this just come off as friendly and not necessarily that they were taking their shot.

To keep women interested you want to come off as gregarious and approachable but also that you are such a cool person that them dismissing you is a mistake in not realizing what a catch you are.

I once dismissed a guy because I wasn’t interested but as the night passed and I saw him be friendly and super cool I remembered thinking, “okay, I shouldn’t have jumped the gun.”

COMFORT-ARLINGTON · 2024-02-15T15:54:40+00:00

they probably glad it wasnt them. kind of like when l see those donation guys, or kids selling candy for their basketball team, approaching other people, so l know they wont be approaching me. the feeling is relief

Total_Obligation_371 · 2024-02-17T17:27:37+00:00

Most people in general don't care. At most what they will do is halfway listen to how the interaction goes if they are within earshot, but only out of novelty / rarity, not because they think you're weird or a creep or you suck.

As far as other girls seeing you do it. For the most part you don't really have to worry about that because statistically, you're not going to hook up with most girls anyway. But even of the ones that you could, it's about a 50/50 split. Half of the girls will not like it or it will turn them off in some way, and half of the girls will find you more attractive because of confidence and competition anxiety they will feel.

Overall it's a wash and shouldn't really be taken into consideration much.

Title	What do other girls think when they see you approach?
Author	Secure-Ear-6185
Upvotes	36
Comments	25
Date	February 13, 2024 3:57 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1apwt4p/what_do_other_girls_think_when_they_see_you/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/what-do-other-girls-think-when-they-see-you.1427670 https://theredarchive.com/post/1427670

Comments