The general consensus is that both male and female SMVs are normally distributed - ie., there are lots of 4s, 5s, and 6s, and only a small group of 1-3s and 8-10s.

This would be accurate in a monogamous society with arranged marriages. For example, it would make sense in a society where the top 10% of men married the top 10% of women, and the bottom 10% of men married the bottom 10% of women, etc.

However, this isn't the society we live in. Most "statistically average" women do not want to marry "statistically average" men. Thus, based on the logic, "Your league is what you can get," it is fallacious to argue that the average man and the average woman are both 5s.

If the average woman doesn't want the average man, they can't both be 5s.

My argument is that male SMV follows a bimodal distribution. The top 20ish% of men (those that every woman wants) are 8-10s. And the bottom 80% of men (those that most women don't really want) are essentially all 1-3s.

Obviously, this is a bit of an exaggeration, but the overall point is: There are a lot of average women out there. It's easy to swap one average girl for another.

But for men, you're either a winner or a loser. A small group of men are "winners," while the vast majority are "losers" in the eyes of women.

TAKEAWAY: This creates interesting dynamics for "average women" in the 4-6 category. Obviously, there aren't enough high-value men to go around.

1) Because of supply and demand, some "average women" will get lucky by shooting above their league and marrying a winner. However, most other "average women" either have to settle for a "loser" below their league, or simply never marry.

Simple analogy: Imagine we're on an island with 1 male "winner," 1 male "loser," and 2 "average women." One woman is simply going to get lucky, while the other woman decides to settle for the loser or just hookup with the winner.

2) Enter girl game. What should you do if you're an average girl who wants to marry a high-value man? Maybe you should learn some girl-game to improve your odds. Figure out what high value men want. Are you more feminine/ submissive than the average woman? Will you tolerate an open relationship in order to secure his commitment?

There aren't enough high value men to go around. Some average women will marry them, but most will have to settle.

We shouldn't pretend that the "statistically average" man has a 5 SMV. In reality, average women's SMV is higher than average men's SMV.

https://datasci.soniaspindt.com/_images/ModeExample.png