Hi All –

Please be gentle with me here. I’m not trying to humble brag, just looking for honest perspectives. I’m almost four years post-divorce and have put a lot of time into recovery, including dating.

I’ve had two longer experiences post-divorce:

  1. One with a single mom who had full custody of her kids. That came with its own challenges. (She was peaceful though/understood better my constraints as single divorced dad)

  2. My current situation is with a younger woman, no kids, lots of free time, and the physical chemistry is unlike anything I’ve experienced before. But she brings a lot of fragility, paranoia, and pressure around marriage/family/kids, that leaves me feeling drained and suffocated.

Part of me is telling me that if I break up with her, I’ll have to start the whole dating process again, and honestly, putting so much time and energy into dating post-divorce has been very draining. At the same time, another part of me knows that staying in a situation that feels toxic isn’t right either.

I feel torn between “on paper this should be exciting” vs. “in reality this feels toxic.” I’m trying to make sense of whether I’m overlooking something or if I already know the answer but don’t want to face it.

Would appreciate any thoughtful advice, please no scorn.