Interesting post about a woman who wants to quit her 40K/year a job and retire because husband owns a successful company earning 200K a year. She is upset and looks to /r/relationships to get advice how to convince her husband to let her stop working at the tender age of 40. Husband says no way. He didn’t marry a kept woman.

23 days go by and she posts an update saying they saw a marriage counselor and she didn’t get her way. She is now going to stop contributing to the household and do whatever she wants which includes threatening to take the kids on a three week vacation without him!

What’s next? I smell divorce, alimony and child support. She is going to retire one way or another, I guarantee it.

My husband and I have been married for almost 20 years. We have 2 kids, one in middle school and the other just starting high school.

We have both been hard workers for our entire lives, and about 10 years ago, my husband decided to take a gamble on opening a small business. It was a very stressful time for our family, as he had to take out a loan and invest nearly all of our savings into it. He also kept working his full-time job until the business was profitable.

The business has grown by leaps and bounds and the total income will be about $200K next year. I make $48K at my job. My job is fine, but there is no more room for advancement and I don't love it.

I told my husband that since his business is doing so well, I want to retire early and stop going to my job. He strongly disagrees with that decision, not because of the financials, but because he thinks it's unfair that he should go to work all day while I don't.

I feel that over the years I have put in my fair share. I have always carried him in terms of housework and childcare and never nagged him about it. We don't need the money at this point (our retirement accounts and college savings for both kids are in good shape). I feel that I shouldn't have to keep going to my paper-pushing desk job if we don't need the money, but he doesn't see it that way.

Am I wrong here?

tl;dr: We no longer need my income and I want to quit my job. My husband wants me to keep going out of fairness to him.

http://redditlog.com/snapshots/845361

Here is the previous post. The summary is, my husband's business makes enough money to comfortably support us, we have been putting my salary away for many years and not needing it, and I would like to retire. But he thinks it's unfair that I should get to retire while he still works.

UPDATE: I took the advice from /r/relationships and insisted we go see a marriage counselor. I told the counselor my side of things, that I have been working the "second shift" for my entire married life by taking care of the household and working, and I'm ready to retire since we don't need my income anyway.

I tried to listen to my husband's side of it, I really did. He said that it's not fair and he didn't marry a kept woman.

I could tell the counselor was even getting frustrated with him, she kept trying to get him to open up and talk more about his feelings and he didn't even understand what that meant.

Finally I told my husband that if he expects me to keep working, then from now on he can take care of the household, do his own grocery shopping, own laundry, cook his own meals, etc. He hasn't done that stuff in 20 years!

I also told him that I would be taking the kids on a 3 week vacation before school starts up again, and he is not invited, but it's all fair because I'll pay for it with my money. I started the paperwork today to stop depositing my entire check into our retirement account and from now on I'll spend on whatever I want.

tl;dr: My husband got so hung up on fairness I told him that to be fair, he can do his own housework from now on and I'll keep my own money and spend it as I like to.

http://redditlog.com/snapshots/845377