Infidelity question.

SteelSharpensSteel · 2018-07-20T15:08:22+00:00

I’m not willing to give up a marriage of 10 years and three kids over some stupid communication over ~~social media~~ boundaries.

FTFY.

MrChad_Thundercock · 2018-07-20T16:34:55+00:00

“willing to give up a marriage of 10 years and three kids over some stupid communication over social media.”

Sounds like you accepted her explanation.

Lion-Slicer · 2018-07-20T14:48:46+00:00

you've been sucked into her frame and now you care more than she does. reverse that. you should be the one the other spouse is onto and worried about. you should be the one snapping with other chicks. get your shit together, get in shape, and start gaming other women. create some distance between you and your wife (by spending more time at the gym, having weekly boys nights, and start getting numbers and being a bit more private with your phone) and like a rubber band she'll come snapping back to you. people run from that which chases them, and chase that which runs from them. the person who cares least wins, and when that's the woman, the relationship dies. care less. fuck around more

pridebrah · 2018-07-20T18:55:38+00:00

Mate guarding is not attractive. If she wanted to jump on Chad's dick, there is nothing you can do to stop her.

What you can do is lift, read, and be awesome so if she does cheat, you can laugh at her as your boot swiftly kicks her to the curb.

askmeanything2 · 2018-07-20T14:44:46+00:00

Setting "hard boundaries" is pointless if you have not already implemented consequences for what she has already done

Lion-Slicer · 2018-07-20T17:48:12+00:00

But again, it was just snaps.

Sounds like she's been working hard to minimize what actually happened. I'd be more worried about what prompted her to reach out and have a 45 minute conversation with him, at a time when she knew you wouldn't be around, and then save his information under a fake name.

You're not going to find hard evidence when she uses a medium that automatically erases messages and has a password protected "My Eyes Only" tab for anything she wants to save. Does she usually communicate primarily via Snap? If this is a marked change from her usual behavior, that would be enough evidence for me.

civilizedfrog · 2018-07-21T14:56:58+00:00

She was willing to give up a marriage of 10 years and three kids over some stupid communication over social media.

An_Actual_Politician · 2018-07-21T00:48:34+00:00

6 days ago, dude shit posted a question about whether or not he passed a shit test, and subsequently disclosed that:

(1) she had been ~~sending nudes~~ Snapping with her ex;
(2) she had changed the name of the dude she had been ~~sexting~~ Snapping; and
(3) had a 45 minute ~~dirty phone sex session~~ phone call with her ex.

Dude acknowledges she crossed a major boundary, and in response he "made her delete his contact," monitors her phone, and told her he "will not [sic] absolutely not tolerate this." (I'm starting to think the double negative was intentional).

Four days ago, dude started sprinkling RP advice on /r/survivinginfidelity, such as these gems (which seem to reveal more than a little self-reflection):

Oh, there are certainly alpha and beta behavior in men. The key is finding the balance of both in an LTR. I’m guessing OP thought since he was married, he could let himself go and therefore the wife lost attraction for him and decided to fuck his better looking friend.

I mean his Jesus his wife came right out and told him this! This shit happens all the time. Google hypergamy. It is in fact biological. Also OP, why the fuck did you move out?? You should have made her move out. She was the one that cheated. Now if you ever want to reconcile for the kids sake or whatever, you will have a hard time getting back into that house my friend.

Do you have you shit together? Do you workout? How’s your hygiene? I think first comment is correct. She’s looking for someone who can meet her needs.

Maybe OP should just stay in the /r/survivinginfidelity sub. Seems like a better fit. [Formatting edit]

friendandadvisor · 2018-07-20T18:47:13+00:00

ask here whereabouts often to regain her trust. Now to me this sounds weak and conflicts with RP theory.

Correct.

I think that you'd better get yourself a backup for the day when your wife lets you know that she thinks that you should take separate vacations.

RedPillCoach · 2018-07-21T16:16:38+00:00

How can anybody help you if you willingly disarm and throw down your best weapon?

[deleted] · 2018-07-24T18:04:33+00:00

i don't mate guard. lots of guys here do but they try to call it "setting boundaries"

it's mate guarding. a real man doesn't have to "set boundaries" with his wife. they're self-evident. when you do you show her she can get to you, proving that you're still living in her frame. if you're a wild lion, if you're a train, your wife will be the one trying to corral you with boundaries, not the other way around

everyone here saying otherwise is just hamstering away their own bad habits

Grimsterr · 2018-07-21T02:29:44+00:00

You do realize no one gives a shit what you're "willing to give up" if it's broke it's broke and if you stay with a cheating wife that's your problem.

ETA: oh and what stupid shit recommends this boundaries and ask her whereabouts stuff? It's just mate guarding and looks quite unattractive to any woman.

Title	Infidelity question.
Author	Lion-Slicer
Upvotes	3
Comments	50
Date	July 20, 2018 2:39 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askMRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/90gj2s/infidelity_question/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askMRP/infidelity-question.204182 https://theredarchive.com/post/204182

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