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Woke_Woman
[โ]CuriousBubbleMilkTeaFDS Newbie130 points131 points132 points 3 years ago (11 children) | Copy Link
"Don't drink the poison just because you're thirsty!"
[โ]queendorkusFDS Newbie28 points29 points30 points 3 years ago* (10 children) | Copy Link
Yes that reminds me from the scene from HP where Dumbledore brought Harry to find a locket horcrux in this really cursed underground lake area. And he drank this terrible sadness potion through, then wanted to drink water and Harry touched this cursed water with dead people in it that started to drown him.
Don't be like Harry.
[โ][deleted] 13 points14 points15 points 3 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
Gandalf?
[โ]CuriousBubbleMilkTeaFDS Newbie14 points15 points16 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Dumbledore. I just watched that scene last night. Breaks my heart ๐ญ
[โ]SearchLightsIncFDS Apprentice12 points13 points14 points 3 years ago* (4 children) | Copy Link
Yes, Gandalf the great.... headmaster of hogwarts. You shall not pass. A wizard arrives exactly at the time he intends to.. breaker of chains, coupon for dominoes.
[โ]CSardothien_1FDS Newbie3 points4 points5 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
โBreaker of chains, coupon for dominos.โ ๐คฃ๐คฃ this has me reeling!
[โ]queendorkusFDS Newbie1 point2 points3 points 3 years ago* (2 children) | Copy Link
Haha yeap. ๐
[โ]SearchLightsIncFDS Apprentice2 points3 points4 points 3 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Awwh you edited your post! ๐ (I thought I was he only one who got those characters mixed up!)
[โ]queendorkusFDS Newbie0 points1 point2 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Haha yeah I was in fact the one who is an idiot.
[โ]superbechidnaFDS Newbie6 points7 points8 points 3 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Iโm loving all the Harry Potter references on FDS! ๐ฆ First the Patronus, now Dumbledore. That said, as much as I like Harry Potter, I didnโt love how romance was portrayed in those books.
[โ]queendorkusFDS Newbie3 points4 points5 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yeaaah. There is much to love about those books though. I don't really recall the relationships as much in the books... I think maybe the movies made more emphasis on them?
I loved how Granger was depicted as the intelligent one. Having a smart lead character as a heroine was great. JK Rowling made some great contributions to the way women can self actualize in this world.
[โ]queendorkusFDS Newbie2 points3 points4 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Ouf. So embarrassing I said Gandalf instead! ๐๐ฅณ
[โ]lil_monsteraFDS Newbie85 points86 points87 points 3 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
This is exactly what I'm learning in therapy. Bad relationships will leave you feeling lonelier and hurt in so many other ways, it's never worth the temporary companionship.
[โ]FDSxMuffinVSrat74 points75 points76 points 3 years ago (17 children) | Copy Link
Easier said than done when you have literally no one. I don't even mean romantically, I'd be thrilled with a friend.
[โ]ceramicunicornFDS Disciple44 points45 points46 points 3 years ago* (8 children) | Copy Link
Iโm just going to respond to this as a counterweight to all the invalidating platitudes youโre going to get, about how itโs better to be thirsty than to drink salt water (yes! but it still really sucks to be thirsty). I too feel terribly alone. I always have fair weather people to hang with as Iโm sociable, but no one who can like, deal with the hard times (nowhere to even go for the holidays without risking some level of emotional abuse)- friends, family, all just completely lost when it comes to being supportive for the not pretty stuff. The second I open up? Zoooommm
Therapist says to form a support network...bitch, where. If I make new friends, itโs going to be months before we go from social to support vibes, and most donโt make it. Itโs just as hard as dating.
And I find myself resentful of friends who have supportive partners and/or family who will drop everything to be there, and theyโre complaining about their stuff to me, a person with a low tank. who is known to be a good time but when it comes down to it, if I died in the woods, as long as I took off work no one would notice for weeks.
So yeah, while I donโt go back to fuckboys because their price (putting my body at risk) is too high, while I limit my exposure, I I fully admit to circling back to low value, toxic people with really bad habits. Itโs that or have absolutely no one to feel seen or valued by.
[โ]lalalalaikaFDS Newbie23 points24 points25 points 3 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Girl, same. At least your therapist remembers your fucking name. The woman I tried got my name wrong twice in one session. I ended all therapy with her that day
[โ]ceramicunicornFDS Disciple11 points12 points13 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
No way! I had a psychiatrist like that who repeatedly pronounced my name wrong for years...that was when I didnโt have the backbone to correct him. Like I would literally leave voicemails with the correct pronunciation ๐
Anyway, when I get the platitudes, they generally come from folks who have the good fortune of being well socially supported, who cannot fathom a life that is otherwise, unless youโre like, a terrible person (Iโm not). I gently remind them that not everyone comes into the world with a mentally balanced, accepting family, and that in big cities, there is a whole lot of disconnect, which can lead to crushing loneliness....so weโre trying to build up to healthy interactions, yes, but sometimes we have to come round (with limited contact) to people who are unwell, just to be genuinely hugged for the first time in weeks ๐คทโโ๏ธ
[โ]sikuletFDS Newbie4 points5 points6 points 3 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I was feeling this โwhere are all these peopleโ??!
So I couldnโt find it And I reviewed my life as to what was my comfort zone, and at that time I realized I liked being in my university as it was my happy place. I wasnโt intending to study again but I always liked taking walks in it, being in that canteen or so. And soon enough I found myself enrolling again for a short course so now that keeps me occupied and Iโm meeting more people who have seemingly more direction in life
[โ]ceramicunicornFDS Disciple3 points4 points5 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I also found a comfort zone where Iโve met great people who are โdoersโ. But have not developed anything beyond the social/superficial. I do hope that some of those you meet can transition into actual out-there-in-the-world sources of support!
[โ][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 3 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
I have no friends or family and no partner, that being said, I have surgery Friday morning and i am going alone! I will not reach out to toxic people in my most desperate of times; it's not worth the the bill to be paid at a later time and it will come due...fact! If I can do that you can keep going until HV people arrive in your life at some point.
*Keeping up with the HP quotes
"Dark times lie ahead of us and there will be a time when we must choose between what is easy and what is right. -Albus Dumbledoreโ
I have been watching the whole series on repeat for support and it has helped immensely.
[โ]ceramicunicornFDS Disciple1 point2 points3 points 3 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Your ability to do this is admired.
[โ][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Well let's see what happens tomorrow?! But thank you that's nice to hear.
[โ]FDSxMuffinVSrat0 points1 point2 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Exactly you get it.
[โ]lalalalaikaFDS Newbie11 points12 points13 points 3 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I feel the same way. The full weight of the pandemic finally sunk in during the past week. People are acting fucking crazy and it makes it so difficult for even a friendship to develop.
I'm maintaining my sanity by spending all my free time under my 15 lb weighted blanket. It makes you feel safe and snuggly.
[โ]Woke_WomanThrowaway Account[S] 31 points32 points33 points 3 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
It's better to be alone than with someone who makes you feel alone.
[โ]FDSxMuffinVSrat2 points3 points4 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Again, easier to say when you have literally no one. I'm happy for people who get out of toxic relationships. But they doesn't mean isolation is ok or easy.
[โ]EclecticBarbarellaFDS Disciple16 points17 points18 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
It can be hard to find friends once you start having standards, especially now with Covid. I had to breakup with a lot of my friends because they were a negative influence and drain on my time and energy and just werenโt trying to level up at all.
[โ]ardiana_hautmannFDS Newbie10 points11 points12 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
you're not alone, lately I have lost my best friend because she was being toxic which I even made a post here, and tonight I feel so lonely I don't have boyfriend so it's really hard โน๏ธ
[โ]kimmna1027FDS Newbie43 points44 points45 points 3 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
I know this isn't exactly related to this post, but I just wanted to say how truly happy I am that this subreddit is a safe place for women. In today's world, there aren't many safe places for us anymore, but to have one genuine place online that is run by women, for women; that's special to me.
[โ]SearchLightsIncFDS Apprentice21 points22 points23 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
In today's world, there aren't many safe places for us anymore, but to have one genuine place online that is run by women, for women; that's special to me.
Crazy that its 2020 and women still be fighting for male-free spaces.
[โ]funky_wormsFDS Newbie15 points16 points17 points 3 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
For real. Sometimes i try to talk about the things we agree about unanimously here (porn, the disparity between men and women, etc) outside of this group and im met with so much backlash
[โ]kimmna1027FDS Newbie14 points15 points16 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
right? i have to remember that not everybody in the world is as intelligent and understanding as this fine group of women here
[โ]PahapanFDS Disciple37 points38 points39 points 3 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I'm the loneliest I've ever been in my entire life. I broke up with my abusive boyfriend which led me to really scrutinize the quality of all my relationships and I realized that almost everyone I've invited into my life wasn't treating me right. My main friend group had a very mean girls quality to it, another friend tried to groom me to have a threesome with her and her fiancรฉ, and I hit my limit with my mother's narcissism and my father's callousness. Cut my friends out and distanced myself from my parents. Right now the only person I really socialize with is one of my brothers. I adopted a cat from a shelter and she's been a balm. It's good to have a pet to take care of that shows you affection even when no one else does.
It's been hard but I know it's necessary for my own wellbeing. Going forward, anyone I allow into my life is going to be thoroughly vetted. I'm not tolerating being mistreated anymore.
[โ]hongkonghenry10 points11 points12 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Dunno where you live but if you need a WhatsApp buddy to text every once in a while for some noise DM me for my info. I am also pretty isolated.
[โ]mourningxdoveFDS Newbie26 points27 points28 points 3 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I went back and it's leaving me more angry than ever.
[โ]Betty_BottleFDS Newbie17 points18 points19 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
We've all slipped up, it's why we're here on this sub โค
[โ]diorgasmFDS Newbie29 points30 points31 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Keep going hermit crab.. this is not the shell for you ๐ฅบ
[โ]seraphinelysionFDS Apprentice23 points24 points25 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Jokes on you guys! I only feel lonely in relationships. ๐...๐ค๐๐ง๐ฅ๐ญ
[โ]bluesky18118 points19 points20 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Was just thinking about my ex again so I desperately needed this. Trying to do a full reset by staying away from dating for a while but man, it's hard. thanks for the reminder!
[โ]jayohday14 points15 points16 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Everybody needs this message during this pandemic
[โ]queendorkusFDS Newbie13 points14 points15 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
๐๐ค๐!!!!!!! Gotta find another way to find friends that aren't the worrrst
[โ]penhasinkFDS Newbie9 points10 points11 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Donโt sweat the times you have gone awry either.
You learnt the phenomena of men, so far unknown to you, now to be known. A wilderness of warning may have never been enough to show you settled. You gave away nothing - just timeโ๏ธWe shall know the tree by its fruit and proceed accordingly ๐๐
[โ]saragc92FDS Newbie9 points10 points11 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Amen!!!! Preach it!!
[โ]justme8000FDS Newbie6 points7 points8 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Exactly a year ago today, I did this. My cat had passed away 2 days before and I was in a very low, lonely place. So that morning when I got the text. โHi. How have you been?โ, my stomach sank. But I still responded. After he quit talking for 2 months, I responded.
And proceeded on a 10 month rollercoaster of gaslighting, manipulation, and emotional abuse that I could have avoided if Iโd heeded FDS then.
[โ]ahsiemkcipFDS Newbie3 points4 points5 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I'm making this my desktop wallpaper!
[โ]Party-Promise-8840FDS Newbie4 points5 points6 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I just went through a breakup and most of my friends were somewhat toxic so Iโve distanced myself from a lot of them and completely cut ties with a few. Iโm not willing to keep trying to make one-sided friendships work. It was taking so much out of me and I lost myself in the process. Not worth it. But lately, I feel really lonely, it sucks. I kind of wish I had more friends to talk to.
Iโve been taking time to focus on myself and get back into my hobbies like painting, and photography, which has been helpful to keep my mind off things. I may adopt a cat again tomorrow as well.
Thank you for posting this, I needed the reminder. โค๏ธ
[โ]bebechka3140 points1 point2 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
๐ฏ๐ฏ๐ฏ
[โ]Bitemebitch00FDS Apprentice0 points1 point2 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I swear I was on instagram the past two days and seeing so many pickmes, toxic relationship examples, and toxic comments from pickmes and men.
Sometimes I just need to come here to feel better.
[โ]futuristicallyangryFDS Newbie0 points1 point2 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Such an important message ๐
ยฉ TheRedArchive 2024. All rights reserved.created by /u/dream-hunter
[โ]CuriousBubbleMilkTeaFDS Newbie130 points131 points132 points (11 children) | Copy Link
[โ]queendorkusFDS Newbie28 points29 points30 points (10 children) | Copy Link
[โ][deleted] 13 points14 points15 points (6 children) | Copy Link
[โ]CuriousBubbleMilkTeaFDS Newbie14 points15 points16 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[โ]SearchLightsIncFDS Apprentice12 points13 points14 points (4 children) | Copy Link
[โ]CSardothien_1FDS Newbie3 points4 points5 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[โ]queendorkusFDS Newbie1 point2 points3 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[โ]SearchLightsIncFDS Apprentice2 points3 points4 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[โ]queendorkusFDS Newbie0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[โ]superbechidnaFDS Newbie6 points7 points8 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[โ]queendorkusFDS Newbie3 points4 points5 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[โ]queendorkusFDS Newbie2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[โ]lil_monsteraFDS Newbie85 points86 points87 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[โ]FDSxMuffinVSrat74 points75 points76 points (17 children) | Copy Link
[โ]ceramicunicornFDS Disciple44 points45 points46 points (8 children) | Copy Link
[โ]lalalalaikaFDS Newbie23 points24 points25 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[โ]ceramicunicornFDS Disciple11 points12 points13 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[โ]sikuletFDS Newbie4 points5 points6 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[โ]ceramicunicornFDS Disciple3 points4 points5 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[โ][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[โ]ceramicunicornFDS Disciple1 point2 points3 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[โ][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[โ]FDSxMuffinVSrat0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[โ]lalalalaikaFDS Newbie11 points12 points13 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[โ]Woke_WomanThrowaway Account[S] 31 points32 points33 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[โ]FDSxMuffinVSrat2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[โ]EclecticBarbarellaFDS Disciple16 points17 points18 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[โ]ardiana_hautmannFDS Newbie10 points11 points12 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[โ]kimmna1027FDS Newbie43 points44 points45 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[โ]SearchLightsIncFDS Apprentice21 points22 points23 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[โ]funky_wormsFDS Newbie15 points16 points17 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[โ]kimmna1027FDS Newbie14 points15 points16 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[โ]PahapanFDS Disciple37 points38 points39 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[โ]hongkonghenry10 points11 points12 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[โ]mourningxdoveFDS Newbie26 points27 points28 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[โ]Betty_BottleFDS Newbie17 points18 points19 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[โ]diorgasmFDS Newbie29 points30 points31 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[โ]seraphinelysionFDS Apprentice23 points24 points25 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[โ]bluesky18118 points19 points20 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[โ]jayohday14 points15 points16 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[โ]queendorkusFDS Newbie13 points14 points15 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[โ]penhasinkFDS Newbie9 points10 points11 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[โ]saragc92FDS Newbie9 points10 points11 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[โ]justme8000FDS Newbie6 points7 points8 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[โ]ahsiemkcipFDS Newbie3 points4 points5 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[โ]Party-Promise-8840FDS Newbie4 points5 points6 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[โ]bebechka3140 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[โ]Bitemebitch00FDS Apprentice0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[โ]futuristicallyangryFDS Newbie0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link