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Where Anger Leads - M3 "If a man .. worked hard and saved, got the rock, .. listened to his father about ‘happy wife, happy life’, listened to his mother to ‘just be yourself’, .. and realizes he’d been lied to.. BY EVERYBODY.. You can understand he’ll be even angrier."

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December 3, 2013
264 upvotes

Since the inception of this sub reddit the moderators have had a very relaxed view of anger and what many perceive as "misogyny" and a common trope is bandied around that there is some latent misogyny here and angry guys, but most of us "get it."

I want it to be clear that the anger isn't just expected, it's encouraged- not because we want this to be the final stage in waking up, but because there's simply no other place that men are welcome with this rage.

The anger will subside, and out of it: hopefully a constructive philosophy towards a better us and a better future.

For many of us who have been here for long, this is old news. For some who are new, I want you to take a moment and read this. If you're an onlooker who thinks we're all nuts, this might be a good read for you too.

If a man took the traditional path, worked hard and saved, got the rock, went down on bended knee, listened to his father about ‘happy wife, happy life’, listened to his mother to ‘just be yourself’, listened to all the gossip columns and girlfriends who advocated more and more supplicating, and then finally listened to his marriage counselor to double down on that supplication.. you could reasonably expect him to be angry when he finds the sphere and realizes he’d been lied to.. BY EVERYBODY. You can understand he’ll be even angrier when he gets constant feedback from other successful men telling him to discard all he’s ever known, told to sack up, learn what it means to be ‘attractive’, learn that hypergamy doesn’t care, learn about female nature, attraction triggers, the science.

Read the whole article at M3

Edit: Another interesting excerpt:

If you were to tell any woman how to fix their girl game problems to work in ‘reality’, like men men are told how to fix their game in our sphere, suddenly they go into hyper rage.

This is interesting. For a while I took part in a female oriented forum discussing "girl game" and true enough, these women didn't want any of the advice I had to give. They would become violently angry before accepting that maybe feminine traits do exist and embracing them would help in their search for the one. They denied even the simple premise that there are strictly feminine traits at all, and any suggestion of embracing them were considered demeaning and sexist.


Post Information
Title Where Anger Leads - M3 "If a man .. worked hard and saved, got the rock, .. listened to his father about ‘happy wife, happy life’, listened to his mother to ‘just be yourself’, .. and realizes he’d been lied to.. BY EVERYBODY.. You can understand he’ll be even angrier."
Author redpillschool
Upvotes 264
Comments 168
Date 03 December 2013 03:21 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit TheRedPill
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/8458
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/1rzw84/where_anger_leads_m3_if_a_man_worked_hard_and/
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Red Pill terms found in post:
hypergamygamethe red pill
Comments

[–]Alpha201352 points53 points  (14 children) | Copy

This pretty much describes me. I'm in my 50s, and only now realizing that I've been lied to all these years. Angry? You better fucking believe it. All I want to know now is how to get over it before it eats me alive.

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[–]Spacelnvader8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

Agreed, exercising is one of the most important lectures I got from TRP. It helps on so many levels, be it as an outlet for your anger, increasing your testosterone, setting and avieving the goals you set, feeling good about your body, or just being much more healthy in general.

[–]apollostatus2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Channeling the anger into exercise and self love has helped me to get over the hump of emotional duress with swallowing the pill. Also it has helped to meditate on our principles post exercise when I am calm. Its Buddhism's Four Noble Truths: pain is inherent to living a life centered on selfish attachment to antiquated principles regarding women & life. Suffering is a choice though...& there is a way out. Choose to love/live on the path of TRP which leads unbridled power & enlightenment.

[–]TRP VanguardHumanSockPuppet9 points10 points  (4 children) | Copy

I find lifting helps.

Let the anger push you to squeeze out an extra rep or two at the end.

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[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

Do you have a method for fasting? or can recommed an ebook? thanks

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[–]Jack_Sophmore1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

This is unhealthy as fuck. You're gonna screw up your metabolism and age your body.

[–]2 Senior Endorsed Contributorvengefully_yours1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I'm 40s and in the same situation. I tend to look forward rather than back ,plan for the future, and thinking of how I can improve my life. The sad thing is women have been my downfall over and over, so my attitude towards them has changed, though I do not hate them.

[–]ozymodeus125 points126 points  (98 children) | Copy

I still have not gotten over the anger stage of the grieving process. I hold an incredible amount of hatred in me, and it is directed at the vast majority of the human race. Sharing how you feel is an important step and anonymously on the internet is the only place I can do it without major social backlash. We need places that accept the anger without judgement.

[–]fiat_lux_34 points35 points  (5 children) | Copy

You are still judged by the rest of reddit, because big social networks have a tendency to be populist.

But fuck them. I empathize, man.

[–][deleted] 50 points51 points  (4 children) | Copy

A lion does not concern himself with the opinions of the sheep.

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[–]RedPillScare1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

What distinction are you drawing between wolves and lions?

[–]Modredpillschool[S] 11 points12 points  (1 child) | Copy

You see, you can only take two across the river at a time, and lions eat wolves, and wolves eat sheep, and farmer john has a hole in his boat...

... I think I lost this metaphor..

[–]RedPillScare2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

There's a hole in the bucket, dear Eliza.

[–]Modredpillschool[S] 59 points60 points  (73 children) | Copy

Working on this sub has been an incredibly cathartic process for me, I find myself less angry and more desensitized than anything. Venting is an important step, and having a like minded community is important to engender that.

[–]TRP Vanguard: "Dark Triad Expert"IllimitableMan43 points44 points  (43 children) | Copy

A chick attempted to debate me yesterday and was criticising the tone, I was thinking "do you even know where you are?" people trying to sanitize TRP clearly do not understand the point of it to begin with.

[–]Senior Contributor: "The Court Jester"GayLubeOil56 points57 points  (35 children) | Copy

Women try to sanitize everything to make it more women friendly. Look at planet fitness.

[–]-Fony-35 points36 points  (14 children) | Copy

worst gym in the country.

[–]Senior Contributor: "The Court Jester"GayLubeOil33 points34 points  (13 children) | Copy

How much of an insecure land beast do you have to be for this commercial to appeal to you?

[–][deleted] 27 points28 points  (11 children) | Copy

So indicative of the difference between men and women. The last weights gym I joined, I walked in and there was a guy deadlifting twice as much as I ever have. I knew I was in the right place. There is nothing wrong with aspiration.

Also, the third hot girl (grey top) in the commercial needs to lose a few kg.

[–]Senior Contributor: "The Court Jester"GayLubeOil22 points23 points  (4 children) | Copy

The biggest guys at the gym are usually realy helpful if you ask them for advice. Hey bro you have a realy nice chest how do you get that separation. That compliment will give them little boy levels of ecstasy and they will help you out.

[–][deleted] 12 points13 points  (0 children) | Copy

After 10 years of lifting, I know what I'm doing, but you are right. The curl bros still ignore them though.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy

The biggest guy in the gym is usually the MOST helpful. They're proud of themselves, and they damn well should be. They put in a SHIT TON of effort working out, eating right, everything. Its a complete lifestyle to get that big, having someone notice, approve, and compliment them is exactly what they want, its the entire point. You're pretty much just walking up and saying, hey, brag to me for a second. They're almost always happy to talk about what they've done to get like that if you're polite.

Its a hobby just like any other, people love to talk about it to interested parties, even more so because you're trying to get into the same thing and you're already in the gym with them.

[–]gg_s1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

This applies to other forms of earned wealth too. A genuine millionaire who worked hard for his money will gladly share his story and give advice, assuming you ask for it.

That's the thing with truth. You urge to tell everyone, but only those seeking truth will listen.

[–]redpill_man47 points48 points  (5 children) | Copy

Women walk into a gym see a very fit person and think: "it's not fair I don't have that body."

Men walk into the gym and see that ripped dude think "Damn, I'm gonna work my ass off and attempt to look like him."

[–]rule_of_law37 points38 points  (3 children) | Copy

I made the comment earlier, but you know those motivation framed posters of arnold schwarzenegger with the captions underneath them? They're supposed to inspire you.

The "what's your excuse?" mom (hot mother posing in front of 3 kids)... that's supposed to inspire women. But it doesn't. It makes them jealous and spiteful.

[–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (1 child) | Copy

Fat girls think, if only we can make ever girl fat, then they'll be on my level. Meanwhile thinspo and fitspo are apparently 'dangerous.'

[–]RedPillScare2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

She's communicating with women as if they're men.

[–]Redpillc0re11 points12 points  (0 children) | Copy

"it's not fair I don't have that body."

"it's not fair that she has that body."

FTFY

[–]caius_iulius_caesar3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

$10/month is kinda cheap, actually.

[–]ReturnThroughAether13 points14 points  (19 children) | Copy

Don't even get me the fuck started on those. "Hey, guys that lift are idiots and we should hate them!"

[–]Evolved_Red25 points26 points  (18 children) | Copy

That swole hate. Sadly it comes from both sexes, and born from insecurity on both parties. Hate from the guys that are jealous (though never admit it) and hate from women who are secretly attracted to it (but don't feel secure enough to be with that alpha).

And as the standard practise, both will shame the gym bro.

As an slim guy, I'm slowly trying to build a physique worthy of that hate :)

[–]ReturnThroughAether5 points6 points  (8 children) | Copy

And they try to convince themselves "Oh I don't wanna get too big" or "I don't like guys with big muscles".

Yeah, I'm sure. May Brodin smile upon your efforts. If you're a smaller guy, make sure you're eating enough (though you might already know that)

[–]Kharn06 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

Little do they know that big =/= strong. It's quite possible to look completely normal in a t-shirt and still bench 1.5 x your body weight.

[–]_MrMan_7 points8 points  (6 children) | Copy

Eh some women just dont like huge guys. Its not a big deal. That doesnt mean they dont like muscles or being in shape. They moisten at the site of a 6 pack, but that doesnt mean they have to find Kai Greene sexy.

I dont like that look either. It has nothing to do with jealously but preference. Id rather look like Bruce Lee or at the most everybody's favorite Frank Zane, rather than Jay Cutler. At some point you just look cartoony.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Are you saying Zane isn't huge?

[–]_MrMan_4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Im saying thats the absolute biggest I would ever want to get. Zane was aesthetic as fuck though. The mass monsters around today just look stupid.

[–]ReturnThroughAether3 points4 points  (3 children) | Copy

I'm not saying you have to be Kali Muscle, but if you spend more time running than lifting, I got bad news.

[–]enticingasthatmaybe-1 points0 points  (2 children) | Copy

What's the bad news? Qualifying for exclusive races? Hanging actual accomplishments on my wall? Those things do suck.

[–]kidvjh4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy

Good for you, everyone should have something to aspire to, to better themselves. Just don't become that guy who never shuts the hell up about lifting. Anybody who has only one interest in life and talks only about that is probably very good at it, and definitely very annoying and boring. Those are the only "lunks" I judge harshly.

[–]Evolved_Red4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Thanks for the supportive words friend. I'm athletic by nature so I can't get like The Rock buff as I burn too much energy - being a former fatty 5 years ago does things to your brain that you dont want to revert to.

I personally can't stand braggers, or worse humblebrags. I believe in men that leads by example, not just talks about it.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (5 children) | Copy

Any guy who hates on another guy for working out (steroids being the exception) is an insecure jealous asshole.

Fitness should ALWAYS be encouraged.

[–]JoshtheAspie2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

For working out period? Definitely.

Criticisms on how much time is spent working on what part of your life, however, are acceptable.

Just like it's okay to criticize a guy who does brain-work all day and never lifts or jogs, it's okay to criticize someone who reverses that too.

[–]Olipyr0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

What's wrong with steroids?

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

Shrinks your balls. I can build muscle, I can't build balls.

[–]libtardm8-2 points-1 points  (0 children) | Copy

you really shouldn't give a fuck about people who use steroids. Don't whine about it.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Wheymen!

[–][deleted] 49 points50 points  (5 children) | Copy

Traditionally men have always had spaces where they can behave without typical social consequence. In pubs in my home country for instance there was always a bar where only men went. It's a part of the feminization of society that those spaces are mocked, removed and sanitized. Where they are replaced, it's with men's groups and other bollocks that just follow the female model of false empathy and shared feelings.

What many people don't realise about what goes on here is that we are just one of those spaces. I may call someone a whore in here, but it doesn't mean I go home and call my girlfriend one.

[–]rule_of_law8 points9 points  (2 children) | Copy

I may call someone a whore in here, but it doesn't mean I go home and call my girlfriend one.

Exactly. There are so many fucking things said in this forum that I would never attach my name to. There are hundreds of reasons for that and they could be explained a thousand ways. The fact is, men, that the knowledge in TRP is a huge fucking secrete. That's why it's called TRP. Because you realize how alone you are with this knowledge. It seems like this for a reason. Don't think for a second that there is a single part of "red pill theory" that some dumbass guy didn't try to explain to the rest of his social circle, and come away alienated.

[–]Modredpillschool[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

I liken it to locker-room talk.

[–]mybudwin-4 points-3 points  (0 children) | Copy

TRP is a concentrated form of medicine. It's bitter, you can only have so much until it fucks you up, and it's made only for the people it's prescribed for.

[–]paradimeshift1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

This! People always hate what they can't understand, or forgot for that matter.

[–]Endorsed ContributorrebuildingMyself7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy

It's just another shit test to me at this point. A bunch of feminists that don't even know how to think of anyone but themselves trying to tell us to beta down.

[–]fruitofmyloom4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

I think an outcome of TRP is actually to be more sensitive to the things that are important and less sensitive to things that are not. If you find yourself in a general state of being desensitized, that's probably not good.

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[–]Senior Contributor: "The Court Jester"GayLubeOil35 points36 points  (1 child) | Copy

Honestly, Prevention is better than healing. If all the 20 year olds here read the stories of the 30 and 40 year olds maybe they wont fall into the same trap.

[–]2 Senior Endorsed Contributorvengefully_yours15 points16 points  (9 children) | Copy

Anger is valid, you can't keep it repressed because it builds up. After the amount of shit a man has to endure over months or years, it takes time for that man to work through it.

[–]cooledcannon-5 points-4 points  (8 children) | Copy

See, i dont believe people necessarily need to express their anger. I dont believe negative emotions build up if you dont "vent" it. imo its better in the long run to "quick relax" than to vent their anger.

[–]anakinastronaut5 points6 points  (5 children) | Copy

Trust me, people need to express themselves. Just not necessarily vocally. Everyone has nonvocal ways of expressing themselves, this culture just focuses on talking.

[–]cooledcannon1 point2 points  (4 children) | Copy

Well I know i said express, but I didnt mean dont express yourself.

I was trying to explain how the belief that venting your anger or not letting your anger be bottled up is probably wrong, because not venting doesnt make you angrier. Like if you let yourself be angry, then your brain is going to find it much easier to be angry again next time around.

[–]rule_of_law3 points4 points  (2 children) | Copy

I don't tend to think about it like I have some pre-determined amount of anger, which I can get rid of by "venting" it in a "healthy way" (really, a way that has no immediate consequences).

I think it's more like a habit. Anger is going to be there, regardless of your actions. Jesus Christ was angry at one point. But venting every time you're angry is basically building a bad habit, where you pretty much condition yourself to expect to get your own little rant or temper tantrum every time you get angry. It's not healthy, and I think it helps the anger become more pronounced, and build. It becomes an obsession, where you're constantly angry and giving yourself these "vents" where you do nothing and bitch about everything.

I am ok with this forum allowing people to exercise their anger, because to some extent I think people need to be able to properly sit down and express what they're mad about. Not to vent, but to investigate what is bothering them. They have to decide for themselves what to do with their new knowledge.

The stages of grief are denial, rage, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. Denial happens until we "swallow the pill". Rage should only be a short period between (because if we linger on this stage we would go crazy). Bargaining, to me seems to play out in this forum where people constantly question the future. I know I do this. The whole "guys will get so laid in their 30s" idea? I think it could be true, but I'll admit it could also be wishful thinking. I think that there's an opportunity for those who are in the bargaining stage to revert back into the denial stage, thinking there's some chance for a bargain to be struck. But, prolonging the anger stage simply delay's the freedom of the acceptance stage, which we should hope for.

[–]cooledcannon2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

But venting every time you're angry is basically building a bad habit, where you pretty much condition yourself to expect to get your own little rant or temper tantrum every time you get angry. It's not healthy, and I think it helps the anger become more pronounced, and build. It becomes an obsession, where you're constantly angry and giving yourself these "vents" where you do nothing and bitch about everything.

Yeah exactly this is my point. I know its slightly off topic but i want people to realise this cause its important.

[–]Modredpillschool[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

But venting every time you're angry is basically building a bad habit

Not at all, it's a way of working through issues and gaining perspective if somebody is listening/giving input.

If you're angry, there's an issue that needs to be dealt with. Venting is perfectly natural and healthy. Bottling it up is bad.

[–]Rienfleche1010111 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

There's nothing wrong about being angry.

There's a reason we as human beings get angry, it's not like it's this useless after effect.

You can channel anger into something constructive or healthy, like running.

Even if bottling your anger doesn't increase it, that doesn't mean that it won't fester and cause stress.

[–]2 Senior Endorsed Contributorvengefully_yours1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Depends on how much anger you have and why.

[–]RedPillScare1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Anger is an energetic emotion. When it comes, it must not be completely repressed, or it festers. Venting is like a pressure valve: it prevents a catastrophic explosion, but doesn't cure the underlying cause.

Expressing anger, and working it out via exercise or combat, is emotionally healthy for men. In civilization, there are few combative outlets and many consequences for fighting, so expressing anger and exercising without fighting are frequently useful ways for men to drain the emotional septic tank without getting arrested.

[–]fiat_lux_17 points18 points  (6 children) | Copy

People have different ways of managing their anger.

I used to be on a collegiate boxing team, and it was a cathartic experience. I've had teammates come in, and punch away at their problems in a way that might have frightened outsiders if more of them came to our little basement in the main gym. And it has.

Frankly, if it bothers the outsiders so much, they can fuck off. No one forced them to come to our own private area, and we weren't taking our violence with us outside to the public or even each other. My teammates were generally very friendly people who just needed an outlet.

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[–]fiat_lux_12 points13 points  (1 child) | Copy

Strongly agreed.

Even sparring / competing, you'd think it might make some of us more violent and bitter, but I've found that it built a lot of camaraderie and mutual respect between us. I respected people I beat to a bloody pulp, simply for the fact that they had the guts to step in in the first place. In turn, I could get my ass handed down to me in the ring, mercilessly, and still be respected by the teammates who were stronger than me. Outside the ring, we'd be very helpful to each other (advice/suggestions towards improvement in the context of martial arts) and very friendly, confident people.

The fact that we had this mutual understanding and respect, and a special interest group isolated from the rest of our social circles (a lot of which happened to be quite judgmental and laden with social mores) was a big relief. The fact that the sport is technically a violent one and has that kind of reputation... scared away the sensitive types, and I considered that a boon. It's not like we wanted to hurt naive newbies who were "just interested" but weren't truly committed and ready to taste pain and defeat.

I can empathize with TRP in that sense.

A lot of people feel threatened by these relatively isolated groups, and I think that is where we see a disjoint between many men and the feminized society we live in. Society feels threatened by these isolated groups of men. The more isolated they look to the rest, the more threatening they feel to the rest of society. The more threatened the rest of society feels, the more invasive it tries to become. It's really a pity.

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy

do you think the Red Pill sub offers a way towards healing

Yes. The mantra of improving the self is harped upon here, and it is the best way to focus a man's energies. There are many TRP men out there, myself included, who are happy with the world and his place in it.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I thought that was somewhat the conclusion in the article that was being referenced in this post from OP?

[–]libtardm8-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

what are you talking about? Learning about RP IS the medicine those guys need. You only have to lurk this subreddit for a week to see it pulls men out of very deep spots after being affected by bad relationships. The anger is part of the healing, its a driver.

[–]quintaldo0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

what are you fucks angry about exactly ?

check my posting history if you will, i'm no feminist

oh all right i'm reading the piece now : http://whoism3.wordpress.com/2013/12/02/where-anger-leads/

yeah ok, sorry about that. I guess I somehow passed through the net. Nothing bright, but nothing that drastically bad.

the day they get cheated on by their soul mate, the day their kids are taken from them, the day they end up going to jail for a false rape, or not being able to keep up with outrageous sums of child support.

yeah, something to fight about, no doubt.

[–]caius_iulius_caesar-2 points-1 points  (3 children) | Copy

"Working"?

[–]Modredpillschool[S,M] 1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

What do you think moderating is? Cake and beer? It's a lot of work.

[–]RedPillScare6 points7 points  (1 child) | Copy

Moderating SRS's favorite sub isn't all BJ's and accolades?

[–]Modredpillschool[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

I mean I do get marriage proposals daily from fat feminists in the form of death threats (they have a funny way of showing their interest).

[–][deleted] 31 points32 points  (3 children) | Copy

It's hard. I was lied to, we all were. My father was useless as a man, my mother useless as a woman, my peers gave bad advice, my schooling equipped me badly. I was angry, but there is catharsis in anger, and I remade myself and came out of the other side. You can do that too.

I still have friends who are deeply resistant to my ideas, meanwhile they are fat, bored and sexless and I'm sticking it in 20yr old poon that cleans up afterwards and then makes my dinner with the biggest smile on her face.

You can get there, and you will. Meanwhile, shout and scream all you want. Call them all bitches and whores. Hate all of feminized mankind. Do whatever you need to regain your rightful mantle as a man.

[–]Force_Padawan17 points18 points  (2 children) | Copy

These social lies we live were not always invented by our parents. Someone force fed this junk to them as well. Not knowing any better they most likely taught it to their children the same lessons. The tragedy of it all is that it is STILL happening today. The good news is that the cycle ends here, one man at a time.

[–]rule_of_law6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

I think what happened with my parents at least, as that they simply assumed things about the world that was true in their time that isn't true 40 years later. It's not even that they were clueless about things like the news, or politics, or that they were "dead set in their ways". If you think about how rapidly things change recently compared to hundreds of years ago, it's hardly a shock either.

I think that my dad, for instance, probably thinks of himself as a very egalitarian husband. He respects my mom, and treats her well in the context of our family. However, he also doesn't hesitate to tell her to shut up sometimes. A modern woman would say this single action disqualifies my dad from the title of an egalitarian husband.

So basically, my dad has a certain view of the world, where he assumes that I will be able to tell the woman I'm in a LTR with to "shut up". That "card" will be available to me. But it won't be, at least not nearly to the extent (with a particular girl)/probability (with women as a whole) that it was to him.

So our parents aren't simply fooling us, they literally didn't know the changing dynamic of spousal relations prevented some of the "red pill" behaviors they took for granted. Having swallowed the pill, it's now up to us to find other "red pill" behaviors to compensate the loss of those other ones.

[–]Hokuten8512 points13 points  (1 child) | Copy

I was in a similar place for a long time. What got me out of it was finally accepting that biology is the basis for everything. Women are only acting out what biology pushes them toward. Even when their goals are in conflict with each other...biology pushes them to want both.

Men are largely no different. Beta men chase the pussy. It takes a intellectual intervention for betas to start behaving in a manner that will actually make their goals a reality.

This includes yourself. You participated and promoted that life style. As did I. This realization helped to turn that anger inward so I could funnel it into the next phase of accepting responsibility for myself and my actions...and then working on improving.

[–]3trplurker1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Same happened here. I was angry at myself long before I found TRP because what I was taught was blatantly wrong, yet I couldn't figure out what was right. I had already found most of the RP concepts but was missing a key piece of the puzzle. That piece was that biology fuels everything, that we act the way we do because evolution made us this way for maximum survival. Once I understood and accepted that, everything because clearer and I've since lost the anger.

[–]SteelChicken11 points12 points  (0 children) | Copy

Don't hate the race. Hate our cultural programming. Its buggy. Its flawed. Worse case, its malware designed to treat us as resources to be exploited. Clean your system. Flush the malware, flush the crap. Drop the anger as soon as you can, because its also malware.

[–]smokes30006 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

Exactly how I feel today, this week. Angry. My thoughts have turned dark because of the holidays, I see how I was been set up by others' expectations, corralled into feeling my attention was an obligation, not exposed to the correct role models growing up, lied to and deceived by people I thought had my side. All around, family especially. I realize and appreciate deeply the ideas in TRP.

To be happy, I will be my only judge. I work to remember these people didn't have my world experiences, so really I cant expect them to understand my particular views of life and love. Sometimes its fucking hard and lonely. So I got a dog, restarted working out like a demon until I'm too tired to be angry. Working on being happy simply for a while.

[–]timmurphy19691 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I wish you the best of luck with the process of grieving whatever it is you are grieving. But you use those two words, "anger" and "hatred," as if they were bad things. While they may be hard to handle, we should hate those things in this world which are ugly, destructive, and savage. We should feel anger when people who should know better give in to them. What I see on this subreddit are people, like you, who "get it." People who feel the visceral, emotional disgust at a lot of the degenerate world around us. Seeing the truth, the way things really are, is an incredible burden - but that's what taking the red pill is about.

[–]HeadingRed0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

It's ok man. Anger can be a great motivator to kick-start your ass on the road to making yourself and your life better. I used to get angry and depressed- not always in that order. When I started to smile in a shitty situation I knew I was starting down the right path.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Catharsis may actually have negative consequences overall. The pleasant experience of venting may encourage more of the initial feelings, or something like that. Best links I could find in a minute: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Catharsis#Therapeutic_uses http://skeptics.stackexchange.com/questions/10245/do-stress-balls-reduce-stress

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (3 children) | Copy

If you've been here the past month you've seen me relentlessly telling people to drop their anger or at least work on getting over it.

I understand anger, being lied to over and over is an injustice worth being angry over. But I believe MRA is a place to vent and get the anger out.

TRP is a place to go once you're done being angry and are looking to move on.

[–]ozymodeus1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

You're right, I have seen your posts but I think the type of anger you have been speaking against specifically has been people being whiny and victimy and complaining. That's not where I think I am. I completely understand and accept womens mating strategy and that I can only effectively compete with it using red pill theory. I am very much tactically and constructively minded about that. But I am angry, not about women, but mens rights stuff that I try to leave at the door. I have also been spending too much time on 4chan and have grown too brusque and offensive for most places to handle. This subreddit seems to handle my off color nature better than most.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

As long as you're angry and DOING something about it.

I just can't stand the guys who post whiny childish slander towards women.

I can't say this enough: WE DO NOT HATE OR DISLIKE WOMEN. WE'RE NOT MAD AT THEIR NATURES. WE LOVE WOMEN.

[–]ozymodeus0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I completely agree

[–][deleted] -4 points-4 points | Copy

[permanently deleted]

[–]Endorsed Contributorgekkozorz2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Oh oh guys, we've got a mad epic troll here.

[–]TRP VanguardArchwinger35 points36 points  (2 children) | Copy

Being a mid 30s, already-married, already-saddled-with-kid guy when I stumbled across TRP, there wasn't much to get angry about. I was where I was. I was a bit pissed off at the world in general, but not at my wife or my kid, or even really at women, or even at myself.

It's only been a few short moths, and life's one hell of a lot more amusing. My wife calls me an asshole on a daily basis and swears she doesn't like me, but I get awesome sex every week instead of limp fish sex every six weeks, and an honest-to-goodness apology at the end of the day after I shut down a bitch fest.

I'm angry all right. Angry I didn't learn this shit sooner. Can you believe the me of a year ago would have bought my wife flowers after a bitch fest? Shit, a couple more years of that, and I'd have been getting divorced after learning that my wife's been getting plowed by all of the richer, sharper-dressing guys around the neighborhood she's always comparing me to. Now, she's deathly afraid that I'm banging the office secretary if I work late and that I'll leave her if she loses her shit or stops being sexually interesting. I won't -- can't afford it -- and I love my little girl to death -- but I'm sure as fuck not telling my wife to quit worrying.

[–]caius_iulius_caesar4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy

You accept once a week? Every second day is my bottom line.

[–]TRP VanguardArchwinger15 points16 points  (0 children) | Copy

It's a work in progress, but honestly, once a week is okay for married+young child(ren). The "average" married couple has sex once every six days.

It's tough to fit frequent sex in when you're both working full time and have a two-year-old. I insist on waking up at 5 every morning to hit the gym, and if everyone's not fed and the kid's not in bed and the house isn't cleaned up until after 10, you're already looking at <7 hours of sleep.

But weekly sex with a willing and receptive wife is miles better than begging for it, maybe getting some pity/duty sex a little less than once a month, and sometimes going 3 or 4 months because your wife's a bitch and you've been too nice for too long when the real solution to your problems was to flirt with hot women in front of your bride. ("Holy shit! My worthless loser of a husband is pulling the interest of women higher value than I am. While I was half asleep being a bitch on auto-pilot, he's been hitting the gym and rocking the professional world. I'd better get my ass in gear.")

[–]Clauderoughly59 points60 points  (5 children) | Copy

This sub has been a wonderful experience for me, because it made me realize that I wasn't insane, and that I was on the right track.

I was beta all through my 20's and realized that shit just DID NOT WORK.

So without knowing any of this I just started living for myself, and not trying to define myself via relationships and women. I started living life and it was fantastic !

It was only then, did I find a woman who made me truly happy and someone who didn't make change one iota.

Since finding this sub, I have used the theories here to make my relationship with my wife even better, and improve the relationships I have with the other women in my life.

I have had nothing but good things come out of this sub.

[–]Modredpillschool[S] 32 points33 points  (0 children) | Copy

I'm glad for you. It really is an interesting position to be in before this subreddit and before the manosphere.

I spent a good portion of the last decade feeling like I was nuts, like nothing made sense. There was what should have been reality, and then there was my experience with it. I noticed things other people plainly didn't. I realized there were power differentials in relationships. I realized how manipulative people are. I also realized that there's a stark difference in approach for men vs women in dating.

Now that we have the manosphere and the red pill, all these ideas and thoughts that I though isolated me finally make sense in a broader context, and better- I'm not the only one who discovered this stuff- there are others!

The Red Pill has absolutely helped with my crippling depression and loneliness.

[–]Kharn013 points14 points  (3 children) | Copy

I really wish this sub had more links/ stories etc about red pill in relationships. One night stands aren't really for me. I'm a romantic, I only want one woman, but I refuse to settle for less than grade A meat. And unlike in the past, I don't want to be such a teddy bear that I get left for some asshole(this happened with both gfs btw) this is why I'm here.

[–]xiko6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

One thing that I learned very very recently was that I was in love of the idea of the long term relationship. I realized I was afraid of being alone. I am still terrified but giving it a name helped.

[–]wolololololololo0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

I know ya feel, mate.

[–]1BaltoSquadGuy0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I know that feels. I just had the same crashing realization.

[–]Endorsed Contributor3030303030303020 points21 points  (7 children) | Copy

I can't read it now but I will later, in the meantime I will give, to any newb in here who might not know it, an absolute M3's classic: http://whoism3.wordpress.com/2012/11/17/confessions-of-a-reformed-incel/

It wasn't nearly as bad for me cause majority of my 20s I was in an ltr but this piece opened my eyes finally and I remember reading it with literally my jar opened and fucking mad, I was breathing heavily standing up each minute or two to walk around the room. Crazy.

This part:

I got to have the pleasure of defending women from the barbs and negs of my player friends only to watch these same women i defended end up going home to sleep with them. My brain simply could not comprehend what the fuck was going on. What the fuck is wrong with these women?

hit to close to home. I had that happened to me to many times.

And this:

What i got instead was a constant drumming of “you’re such a good guy, just wait, someone else is out there for you” – “you don’t have to change a thing, you’re a wonderful person, just keep being yourself” – “you don’t need muscles, only jerks care about having big muscles” – “there’s nothing wrong with you, you just need to be a bit more confident that’s all” – “confidence comes from the inside, not from the outside“

Patent fucking lies all of them.

Now I laugh at it cause I know women say one thing and do another but back then it was illuminating and enraging, I don't think I ever was as angry as reading this post made me. I was in fury. I couldn't sleep that night until early morning.

If you haven't, read it. It takes good 20 minutes but it is worth it.

What I'm trying to say.., it's almost impossible to not be angry. And it's ok to be angry.

[–]puaSenator19 points20 points  (3 children) | Copy

We hear it all the time. Some guy will be talking to a girl about his failure and looking towards her for advice. It'll be the whole, "You're a great guy, you just need to find the right person." Now, women tend not to talk to solve problems, but rather talk about problems. So the guys aren't even getting real advice. She knows, she damn well knows EXACTLY why he can't find a woman, but she wont tell him. Why? I have no fucking idea. Maybe she's just too afraid to hurt his feelings.

But it doesn't just end there. Society as a whole has become feminized, so no one even likes telling people when they are failing. They just like to tell people that everyone is special and doing fine. That doesn't fucking help the slightest. If I'm fucking up, or not doing a good enough job, tell me. Tell me exactly where the problem is so I can get working on it. Don't tip-toe around the subject. But society no longer does that when everyone is a special little snowflake. It's disgusting and counter productive. This is why it's great spaces like TRP exist. No one is afraid to say right in your face that what you are doing is ridiculous, retarded, hamstering, weird, and/or beta. Now, not to hurt your ego, but to help you understand your shortcomings. Usually every time someone is being spineless, they are told they are being spineless, why they are being spineless, and how to fix being spineless.

It's hard to find this sort of constructive discussion anywhere else. In most spaces filled with women, it's like walking on eggshells where everyone has to constantly qualify what they want to say with BS like, "Well, now I'm not saying you're weak or attacking your masculinity, but maybe possibly the reason she isn't attracted to you is just because you aren't confident enough. You should try going to counseling and figure it out." No, around here it's, "Hey, you're weak and acting like a woman. Let me help you."

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

She knows, she damn well knows EXACTLY why he can't find a woman, but she wont tell him. Why? I have no fucking idea.

Because that would require leadership and assertiveness, things that women tend to lack. It also doesn't require consensus, and women fail to do much without that.

[–]caius_iulius_caesar0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

She knows ... But she won't tell him.

Women care about how they are perceived by others more than almost anything. (Sometimes more than the lives of their children.)

She doesn't want to come off as a bitch. Ironic, huh?

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

It wasn't nearly as bad for me cause majority of my 20s I was in an ltr but this piece opened my eyes finally and I remember reading it with literally my jar opened and fucking mad, I was breathing heavily standing up each minute or two to walk around the room. Crazy.

Carbon copy of my realization. Was pretty stunned when I realized I had skipped out on my morning class because I was reading that story, and then diving into the Rational Male Year One. First time in my life where I was actually hungry to read more, vs. trying to become informed.

[–]TRP VanguardCyralea0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Hah, that's me about 7-8 years ago. I recall all the anger I had then too. I didn't find TRP until I'd already ditched a lot of my beta ways. I remember having so much distilled hate and nothing to channel it into, even though I went to the gym and did sports.

Funny how neutral about it I feel now. It's more like a simple sneer at the ridiculousness of it all.

[–]caius_iulius_caesar0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Well, there is research suggesting women prefer lean over bulky men.

[–]wh40k_Junkie8 points9 points  (2 children) | Copy

This is so true. I've been here almost an entire year now and I remember at the start how bad it got. I was reading everything I could all day long, I was getting in fights with everyone over anything related to these subjects. Hell, I hated women.

And then the anger subsided. It's like the grieving process, I'm not done accepting everything on here because it requires a radical departure from the failure I once was.

Just the other day, I was at a pub with some friends. Got to talking with another group that was there and we sat together. A guy and a girl, I asked if they were dating to determine whether or not I could hit on her (even though it's not advised on here, I tend to avoid hitting on girls with bfs, it's not about them, it's about my peace of mind.)

She, very strongly from the get go, made clear that they weren't dating. I got irrationally angry at the dude. He was who I used to be. Even when at the end of the night I was making out with her, got her number and agreed to meet some time in the future, he wouldn't leave. He was so hopeful, he hated me for doing what he wanted to do, and I hated him for reminding me of who I was. He was in the friendzone and I hurt him by going after the girl he was pinning for.

I've mellowed out a lot on a lot of issues, my confidence has gone up, I've lost 15 pounds, but it's a journey and it's never really done. Just take the time you need to go to each phase, I'm just now really learning game, because there was no point to me learning it before-hand. You'll know when you're ready to go where you need to go.

[–]1BaltoSquadGuy0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Should have slipped him a link to this sub

[–]wh40k_Junkie1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Honestly, I tried to bring up some points, and not the hardcore stuff, but the introductory material, and he wasn't having any of it.

I was like "bud, I know how it feels, but if you want her to respect you, you can't take her shit, just fucking leave without her" and he wouldn't budge without her. I felt sorry for him

[–]rodz732 points33 points  (3 children) | Copy

I sometimes feel out of place in this sub, given my background doesn't appear to resonate with many of the Offtopic/Rant posts. Fortunately for me, I was raised with a father who took me fishing, hunting and encouraged my participation in all sports and academia. He is considered the leader of the hunting group of close family friends and introduced me at a young age, when no other young male was invited or wanted to attend. He came from a poor family and has worked his whole life to give me a great education and provide everything for his family. I mention his influence to bring to light that although I'm still in my 20's, I've had more success with women than virtually all my friends, and many of my colleagues, both at work and those I've met throughout my studies. I've rarely felt this 'anger' and generally laughed it off because I knew these girls would contact me soon enough. I was right about this most times.

I don't say this to brag, but rather, because it led to me a position where a number of mates would ask for advice and look up to me, and I'd struggle to give a profound, yet, succinct explanation of how to have more success with women. I could somehow pull it off, but I couldn't tell you how or why. Often, I'd be the only outlet some would have, as their parents were either divorced or their father was a fraction of the man mine was. I've seen guys cry and yell when they've hit 20 and are kissless virgins. I don't pity them, but I can see why they are bubbling with anger. In school, these boys are belittled for playing rough, whilst girls are put on a pedestal for being teacher's pet. As they get older, and their bodies crave sex, they are told the only way to attain a partner is to compliment her at every opportunity and shower her with gifts. IT'S ALL A FUCKING LIE.

Sure, getting a girl a gift isn't a crime that will make her run away instantly. Sometimes, your women needs a small reminder you care. Nevertheless, I always remembered in my high school years how strange it was that the boys who bough flowers and chocolates for the girls they had a crush on, never got to make out with them. One or two would call up the local radio at night to dedicate love songs, and still, absolutely nothing. They were textbook NICE GUYS.

So, while the rest of this site likes to call you and I rapists/misogynists/virgins/neckbeards or whatever else, this is a place you're fine to talk like a man. It helps me, because I now have a clearer understanding of what I was doing from a younger age, and how to maintain and improve that as I approach a time in my life I have big decisions to make. It helps my friends, as I now have the answer they need for picking up that cute little thing at the club, or that girl they've been crushing on since the beginning of time. It's okay to be angry as long as you aren't taking it out those men and women in your life who have been told the same as you.

[–][deleted] 17 points18 points  (0 children) | Copy

You should make this its own post. It would probably resonate with a lot of the individuals who are looking through the subreddit who don't exactly relate to all the "discovering red pill realization" type posts.

[–]RockinRhombus7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy

these boys are belittled for playing rough, whilst girls are put on a pedestal for being teacher's pet.

That's what bothers me the most. It's all these years of having been pretty much confined to a cage. Can't show too much aggression, or else you're quickly beat down by society.

However, it's all like how they keep circus elephants in chains. At a young age, they were confined to the chains, but as adults, the only thing keeping them in those chains is conditioning. TRP is realizing, "Hey, I can LITERALLY do what I want, and can't be held down if I don't want to".

[–]TRP VanguardCyralea6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

Your whole post is gold, but this bit:

It's okay to be angry as long as you aren't taking it out those men and women in your life who have been told the same as you.

this is where the value comes through. If you just browse this sub and use it only as a vehicle for your anger you'll get nowhere. Make a commitment to yourself to improve, then you'll start seeing results.

[–]1wakethfkupneo10 points11 points  (1 child) | Copy

I'm only angry for not swallowing RP earlier. And boy am I angry last month or so getting flashbacks of all the blue pill crap I went through, missed opportunities and lolbad mistakes I made. I guess it's personal attitude or maybe I'm past that depressive phase, but I'm now in 'opportunistic' mode, experimenting, playing just for fun, like a toddler in toy store ... and what can be more fun than learning some weird new trick and seeing it actually works. No real point in denying, it's how it is.

The truth will set you free, but first it will piss you off!

[–]deepsouthscoundrel2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Ignorance is bliss, but knowledge is power.

[–]Endorsed Contributorpontifx6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

I support this. I am not angry at women, or life, or anything even though on paper mine would be classified as an outlier in difficulty but I was critically devastated when I was younger. It was before I understood why people operate the way they do. Its taken me 12 years to acclimate. I am only now and even as of a few days ago returning to a state of living inside of myself that I find suitable for me.

You don't have to conform to the methods and practices we preach here right away either. Throughout my life I have taken breaks from girls, profit, and creativity. You need the rest to grow. If you hate the way it works so much you ghost and disappear for a while don't hide from that just get it over with. I did it for a couple years and recommend it. Currently I am effectively ghosting because of a lack of time but I am finding the same serenity. I doubt I would have this understanding had I not forced myself to take a break from spinning plates.

You just have to understand that everyone given the chance will kill rape rob or smear your name. You are not a human being as a man, you are a resource. You were grown not born. Women are born into this world. They are brief, brilliant lights that flutter about that cost resources. Anyone who tells you its beta to be rich is selling you something. You may not have cold hard cash money in the 10 digit range but you might have artistic creativity, you may have pussy-tingling rapport etc. These are all resources you have to perform a balancing act with. You have to perform an endless balancing act between availability and assailability.

The images that we chase after, the behaviors we prefer, and the mates we select are purposely designed to be with as little rational influence as possible. The happenstance in your life once you evaluate it is staggering. Successful people operate with less accident then the rest of us. Once you understand the balancing act your sexual desires may shift, your perceptions of women certainly will. That will also take time to accept.

Each of these stages has a different emotional flavor, some are staggering in their magnitude and others as so subtle that only once other people have shown you them can you pick up on them.

As long as you serve yourself in a way that increases your willpower, makes your routines easier to maintain, and allows you the freedom to maintain some slice of life that you protect from these inalienable rules the anger, the rage, the void, all of it subsides and a new confidence is born. One that commands the room when shown, like the crown of a king.

Indeed, a new regency is born from it.

[–]Opioidus7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy

I had this omega bro that I turned into a player, and he still hates women. Funny thing is, he always tells me he worshiped women when he was a 22 yr old virgin and didn't had any access to them, the hate came when he became successful with the ladies, not when he was a loser!

He hates them because of why they love him now, not because of why they hated him then..

[–][deleted] 17 points18 points  (0 children) | Copy

I've made an incredible amount of positive changes in my life. Everything I could positively affect has turned around in a complete 180.

I have money, houses, nice cars, I get laid whenever I want....

Life is better than it ever has been - in those terms.

However, I haven't had visitation with my one of my kids in years - the other one just stopped coming. My heart is shattered into a million pieces.

No amount of Red Pill philosophy is going to change that. The damage is done. Being a father to them is one of the great joys in my life. It's not me I feel for most, the confused and angry feelings I know they are having to deal with make this all the more maddening for me.

It's a frustration I cannot even begin to give justice with words. Through the years of fighting in the courts with the ex to be a part of the children's lives, the struggle nearly undid me - on several occasions. The stress and anxiety drove to more than just sleepless nights, it began to affect my health. When my 13 year old son said he did not want to come see me anymore, I knew that he just gave up. I know he loves me as much as a son can love a father, but the pressure from the mother's unending war against me was finally too much for him. I knew in my heart I had to stop fighting too. For his sake, for my 15 year old daughter's sake, for my new wife and our 4 year old child's sake and for my sake. I am worn out.

This has been the toughest decision I have ever had to make in my life - to give up this fight. I must mourn and process this in my own due time.

My ex-wife is a lying, slandering monster. She a sociopath that will stop at nothing to win - and the state is right there supporting her every step of the way. My children will now have to finish growing up without the love of their father, as I have no hope of ever having a relationship with them - as long as they live under my ex-wife's influence.

So am I angry? You better goddamn fucking believe it. On a scale of 1-10 - I'm 1000. I am completely and utterly baffled that I live in a society that not just permits this, but facilitates it. This harm that I have experienced... I wish no man reading this ever has to go through it.

What other choice do I have now, but to soldier on? I'm doing what I must. I am not destroyed by this, but I am definitely wounded. The healing process is going to take some time...

[–]Mr_Bell10 points11 points  (2 children) | Copy

The very fact that we have a sticky post addressing anger illustrates how masculine values are buried deep down in the mind of even the most hardcore of us.

(Not criticizing the OP here) This post seems to justify anger to ourselves. And this is an anomaly. We mustn't. We all know anger is a trait in men. This trait should be respected.

We shouldn't be ashamed of being angry (neither with the lies we've been told, nor with everyday issues). We shouldn't need to hide behind fake reddit profiles to vent! We're not being violent to anyone, we are definitely not breaking any law. But our thoughts are confined to our minds and these characters on a screen. Because they are filthy.

We feel filthy for being men and being angry every now and then.

[–]RedPillScare11 points12 points  (1 child) | Copy

We must hide not because we are filthy, but because we are judged by those who are not our peers. I certainly don't feel filthy. I feel cleansed!

Women and whiteknights are not qualified to judge us, yet they do, and their judgment finds us wanting. While a lion does not concern himself with the opinions of sheep, he does not wander blithely into the jackals' den.

We must use pseudonyms and throwaways to protect ourselves from the actions of those who would attempt to do us harm in their self-appointed roles as judge, jury, and executioner. Doxxing has real-world consequences.

The Red Pill is unpopular, and our detractors are not bound by civility, morals, or any sense of fair play. Disagreeing with our philosophy justifies getting us fired from jobs, excluding us from use of social media, and misrepresenting our values.

It is not our shame that leads us into concealment. It is the religious persecution we endure as Red Pill swallowers. Just as the matrix would kill someone who awakened; the church persecuted Galileo for his heliocentric theories; and the persecution of religion in communist countries; we are to be persecuted for having a philosophy different from what is approved by those with the power to do us harm.

Galileo was right. It didn't prevent him from spending a life under house arrest for his perceived heresy before the church. Bucking the system is dangerous work.

[–]Mr_Bell0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I think you're absolutely right about safeguarding ourselves from the knights of the status quo.

But I think most of us needed a lot of rewiring when we first took the pill. And this is the filth I was referring to. Being beta means denying our natural behavior, our natural thought processes. And society wires us to think they are utterly wrong, filthy.

One must work hard to feel cleansed. Just like in the Matrix, Status Quo will offer you a fake but juicy stake. It's hard not to fall for it, not to give in.

It's a fucking struggle. But it sure as hell is a good one.

[–]7Vega5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

I want it to be clear that the anger isn't just expected, it's encouraged.

This guy is a fucking champ.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

You have to master anger. But you will never learn to master anger if you don't accept it and realize it's a natural emotion within you. Just like you have to master fear, guilt, laziness, etc. Hatred too - hatred is an important, powerful thing that exists as an emotion and a conscious choice. The trick is to learn to dominate yourself and shut down the emotionally-spawned hatred, but be able to consciously apply hatred in situations where it behooves you.

This is to me the power of the dark side. Let your anger flow through you. It's real - denying it's existence brings you misery. If it dominates you, though, you are fucked. And when you cover your anger by ignoring it and acting like you aren't mad despite being torn up inside, you better believe the anger has dominated you. You were scared of the anger so you ran instead of confronting it - the net result is the same, your emotional anger still runs you.

You have to dominate it. Think of anger as a caged bear, with your mind being the cage. You have this force inside of you that is capable of mauling everything around you and doing incredible, powerful things. Yet you self-impose mental restraints, meaning you are in control of when the bear gets out, and you have the ability to put it back under control.

[–]koukol3 points4 points  (2 children) | Copy

I share the anger, though not the story. Most of my life I was a complete gamma. I did however have more than a few sigma moments that taught me not to be too taken with the bullshit of our times.

It was not anger that lead me here, but fear (and obviously frustration). Fear of women, of other men, and maybe of myself, of what I could do if I allowed myself.

That fear was crippling, and drove me to live a static and lonely life. This fear lead to frustration, the frustration to anger. I became scared of acting out on the anger, and the cycle kept going.

Although I may not relate to the man described in the above article, coming here motivated me to try to break away from the vicious circle that drove me still.

And although I may not care or agree with all that I read on this sub, reading its posts inspires me not to settle for a mediocre life.

[–]caius_iulius_caesar0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

What could you do if you allowed yourself?

[–]koukol0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Nothing explicitly illegal, I swear!

[–]Vily_R5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy

deleted

[–]caius_iulius_caesar0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Mr Vily Goes to Washington.

[–]Kharn05 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

I think most of the anger come from the same thing that undoes empires, tribes and any who aspire to greatness. Victory. Enemies are defeated, resources are depleted, renown gained, families are acquired. And then what happens? Empires become corrupt, resources wasted, great achievements fade into the past, wives become nagging and less attractive, you gain weight, lose energy, would rather watch sports than play them. Then you realize, so much work, sweat, blood, time and stress, for THIS!? You won the war only to be shot at home, in the back. Victory has defeated you.

"In victory, sharpen your knife"

[–]MockingDead3 points4 points  (2 children) | Copy

The truth sets you free from anger. When you understand the truth, you can stoically accept it, or change it.

But first it pisses you off. You say "it should be like this, I deserve this or that."

Should and Deserve are not factual statements, they are opinions.
You have this is a fact, you want this is fact. How do I get X when I have Y are facts.

I don't want to work hard enough to get X is also a fact, and is often the truth about why you don't have X. this isn't bootstrap self-help. You may have mental illness or a crippling injury that prevents you from being your best. This is a part of life. No use becoming angry about it. Find a way, like Achinger's Bound Man, or don't.

The anger is the existential crisis of seeing the world as it truly is. Like a man who loses faith, it can seem damning. But it isn't. It just is.

To get past it you need to forget the tiger and eat some strawberries.

[–]Flaydogg1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Should and deserve are not facts, they are opinions. I havent seen any truer words in all the internets. Thank you.

[–]MockingDead1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I have to remind myself of this every day. I made a habit of shoulds and deserves.

[–]ryeprotagonist5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

M3 does it again.

attaboy Mike.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

I'm still in the bitterness stage, but mostly about my ex-wife. Harping about her feels right, but it's like cutting. Seems great right now, not a good idea in the long run.

I don't look at girls and think "you fucking hamster." I look at my ex-wife and think "you fucking bitch."

[–]Luckyluke232 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

you'd be pissed to, if everything you believed in was a lie.

[–]updock1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I went through DABDA. I'm currently somewhere between the second D and second A. I think it's normal for this.

[–]AlmostRP1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

This is starting to sound very much like a NMMNG group.

Not that it's a bad thing, and not that I want to see TRP become a support group, but every once in a while you get some hostility towards that kind of deal.

Conflicting directions?

[–]Modredpillschool[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

NMMNG

It's a book that a lot of new members read.

It doesn't define us as a group, but it's certainly a component. This sub is clearly partially self-help.

[–]AlmostRP0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

It's what I started with. Really describes the whole "and it's okay to be angry because everything you've been told and how you've been living your life is wrong" thing pretty well.

[–]RedPillScare1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Thank you for clarifying. We are in agreement.

For myself, I always felt filthy before first swallowing TRP. The cognitive dissonance between what I was taught and my instincts was shameful.

[–]through_a_ways1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Girl game: Don't be a pig

[–]libtardm80 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Don't be lazy.

[–]lothar521 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

appealing directly to man’s innate evolved mechanism to protect females in order to manipulate men into the mangina role of helping them further their agenda

Holy shit. Epiphany #239804598, brought to you by TRP.

[–]Mr_Andry3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

I don't hold that anger, and I can't relate to men who do. Maybe I have low T (I've never tested it), but it simply doesn't make sense to be angry at a bear for being a bear, or a wolf for being a wolf, or a chicken for being a chicken. Women are women, and if they act according to their nature, how can you be angry at that?

I'm far more pissed at myself for not seeing through the charade for so long, but with all the bullshit being laid on so thick and pervasive throughout society and the media, how can you blame yourself for long either?

As far as I'm concerned, it's unmanly to hold on to anger. You look out of control and weak. I'm cool and calm, and once I get the rest of my life in order the way I want it, I'll be getting far more tail than some testosterone junky who walks around pissed off at the world and easily triggered. I accept the world as it is, and will use my knowledge of the truth to my advantage rather than raging against it.

[–]PrisonerOfLife2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

The anger never went away for me. I unplugged at 19 (I'm 24 now) and started reading a lot of MGTOW forums to understand the true nature of women.

It's frustrating to be on the shitty end of the bargain where women don't give a fuck about men and see us as disposable objects for entertainment but as a man you're expected to treat women well in spite of them treating you like dogshit. This game shit doesn't do it for me either; I can't listen to a woman talk for more than 30 seconds before I want to knock her the fuck out. You're essentially playing a psychopath if you try to pretend you actually care what women say just to fuck them, and in that regard, you become the thing you hate.

[–]alcockell1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Oh - add being the victim of sexual bullying by girls at 13 (when my libido didn't boot till 18 - so it was like being a victim of sexual assault at 8)... and having Asperger Syndrome against me as well.

Led to piling on the weight - and only ever knowing anything sexual as a threat... and knoowing that with hypergamy running rampant now - but AS being like "anti-Game on steroids with a growth hormone"... [email protected] completely fucked at 42 - still a virgin and likely to remain one. Can't do the "bastard" act at all...

It's bloody horrible. I hope someday some equilibrium could be regained...

[–]Force_Padawan3 points4 points  (6 children) | Copy

Fear is the path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering.

     - Master Yoda 

[–]Force_Padawan7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy

Nah, Yoda is definatly alpha, when it comes to yoda he gives no fucks.

[–]MagicGainbow6 points7 points  (2 children) | Copy

''Give in to your hate!!!!!'' - Emperor Augustus Palpatine.

[–]caius_iulius_caesar0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

I love it that even /r/TRP is this lighthearted.

[–]MagicGainbow0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

''You're welcome!!!!!'' - (Not)Emperor Augustus Palpatine.

[–] points points | Copy

[permanently deleted]

[–]caius_iulius_caesar1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

But Yoda's talking to Luke, and Luke is - oh never mind ...

[–]thinkon1t0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Anger is one of the stages of grief. You must go through it. What are we grieving? Our lost illusions. Welcome to humanity gents. Welcome to adulthood. Great post.

[–]caius_iulius_caesar0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Anger also exists independently. And Kubler-Ross was wrong.

[–]numbers3280 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

http://psychcentral.com/lib/the-5-stages-of-loss-and-grief/000617

anger is an early stage in grief--in this case over the loss of our childhood ideal

[–]boring_yawn0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

"just be yourself"

I think a lot of parents give terrible advice because of survivorship bias. My dad had a girl (not literally) fall into his lap in highschool and then they got married not long after graduating. He was successful by being himself so he thinks it is a good strategy to be successful.



You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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