Well, at least it made the news that she got off free

[–]theothermod[M] [score hidden] 8 years ago stickied comment (0 children) | Copy Link

[+]PM_ME_DIRTY_SPONGES1 points 8 years ago [recovered] (70 children) | Copy Link

Gotta love how a guy being a douche gets more attention on twox than a man having his life destroyed by false accusations.

[+]todoke1 points 8 years ago [recovered] (2 children) | Copy Link

The butt slapper is facing 1 year in prison. While this woman is getting nothing for trying to ruin a good cops life

[+]tothecatmobile1 points 8 years ago [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link

I wonder what can actually be done about her though.

As far as I'm aware she didn't actually go to the police about this, so it would be a case of defamation, which is a civil matter.

[+]Lethn1 points 8 years ago [recovered] (54 children) | Copy Link

In their heads they literally think that women can do no wrong that's why they will always focus on something a man does and completely ignore anything bad a woman does.

Once you understand that's the mentality they have, then you understand feminists and why they do what they do. Any criticism of women is misogyny, any actual evidence of wrongdoing by women is denial of rape culture.

[+]MeEvilBob1 points 8 years ago [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link

"There's no evidence that Eva Braun wasn't a good person".

[+]TheySeeMeLearnin1 points 8 years ago [recovered] (16 children) | Copy Link

In their heads, they think that the wrong that women do is statistically small enough to not focus on because oftentimes singular cases are used as a straw man argument to maintain a system that, in their perception, still operates to their detriment.

I’m not saying who’s right or not because I only stumbled on this post from /r/all and usually wouldn’t comment, but I like to find places where I can do something to bridge a gap without offending, which is tough these days because people seem to be seeking out offense and try to turn their feelings into other people’s problems.

[+]Drewfro6661 points 8 years ago [recovered] (15 children) | Copy Link

Agreed completely (and also from /r/all).

I strongly sympathize with the Men's Rights movement, but I just really, really cannot get past the whole feminist-hatred thing. I do not understand why promoting fairness for men has to involve dismissing unfairness against women. (And, to be clear, I understand that not all MRAs are like this. But there's a reason why an anti-feminist post gets 100+ upvotes on here)

Some feminists are crazy man-haters. Most just want fairness and equality. But you're not winning any friends complaining about feminism, collectively attacking a large group of potential allies because some of them are critical towards your movement and goals.

[–]Arby01 20 points21 points22 points 8 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link

I do not understand why promoting fairness for men has to involve dismissing unfairness against women.

You have confused two things. "anti-feminism" and "dismissing unfairness against women" are NOT the same thing. At all.

Most of MR could be considered to be feminist, as feminism is commonly understood to be defined. The problem that exists is that the common understanding of what feminism means, and what organizations and individual feminist do, under the guise of feminism is radically different.

Some examples may help. Ever hear the canard "a woman's standard of living drops 70% in divorce and a man's increases by x%"? This was research produced in the 70's by a gender studies professor. You might think, "yeah, ok, in the 70's divorce was a big deal". That's true, but the research never was true. It was falsified from the data. The researcher refused any of her peers access to her data for over 10 years. When the criticisms were leveled, she blamed it on a grad student having made a math error. This research was the basis for reforms in alimony and child support since then. Which means that the amounts calculated are based on a lie. That seems like a big deal. (you can google this whole thing - the researcher is a dean of gender studies at an influential university. Name me any other field where you can have your research proven to be falsified and still profit from it. Researcher is Lenore Weitzman. )

For example 2, I would refer to domestic violence. When the first women's shelter's opened, several educated leaders in the field started talking about how the levels of violence in domestic relationships were appearing to be roughly equal from the data. Those people were pushed out of the field. The feminist groups promoted the "woman as victim philosophy". From that start we ended up with issues like the "Duluth model". You can read up on the Duluth model if you like but essentially it means "arrest the man in (almost) every case". The logic ends up being that if the man is stabbed, beaten or otherwise injured, it must have been defensive and he gets arrested and charged and removed from his home. There are plenty of examples of this. This is so pervasive in the field that if you look at domestic violence hotlines the information often says things like "if you are a woman experiencing violence call xxx-xxxx for help. If you are a man struggling with not being violent call xxx-xxxx for help". The concept that men can be abused within domestic relationships has been completely erased. This is feminism.

Every group has fringe elements. MR is almost completely pro-women's equality.
However, when you criticize feminism, even if that criticism is valid, every woman who thinks "feminism is equal rights" shows up screaming. The problem is that feminism is not "equal rights". It's a "women's advocacy movement" and it absolutely necessary. Right now however, it has a stranglehold of the entire gender discussion. That's bad and especially bad for men. That's why MR has a strong anti-feminism presence. Not because there is a desire to "dismiss unfairness against women".

[+]Drewfro666 -7 points-6 points-5 points 8 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link

[–]HotDealsInTexas 13 points14 points15 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

As a moderate feminist, it makes me hesitate to participate in the MRA community.

You know what, to be quite honest, I don't really care how you feel. This movement's membership is made up largely, if not primarily, of ex-Feminists, and in my experience the Feminists who are genuinely interested in finding common ground end up abandoning the label sooner or later because they discover the truth about how poorly Feminism lines up with its stated ideals - either from us or from the backlash they receive from their fellow Feminists when they dare to say those filthy MRAs might not be that bad.

Many Feminist attempts to engage with the other side are also outright untrustworthy. For example, MensLib, a subreddit popularly promoted as a "alternative men's movement that isn't anti-Feminist" has a rule banning even discussing "Financial Abortion" or "Legal Paternal Surrender," and the mod has said the ban is because he considers it a "deriliction of men's responsibilities." This so-called men's group stands in direct opposition to even the most basic goal of men having equal rights under the law, and this is part of a pattern.

If you want to keep trying to reconcile supporting Men's Rights with continuing to associate yourself with a movement with a consistent track record of opposing men's rights (note the lack of capitalization), go right ahead, but we're under no obligation to treat the overwhelmingly louder Feminist voices that are hostile to us with kid gloves just to make it easier for you.

[–]Arby01 9 points10 points11 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I do get why the MRA community might be a little hostile towards certain feminist groups.

You think you get it, but I suspect that you miss the bigger picture. You mentioned focusing on the 'positives for men' instead of the 'negatives of feminism'. This is a maze of competing interests. For domestic violence, you follow the money. The groups involved fight against men's shelters and other ideas because it would affect their bottom line. But the rely on the label of 'feminism' to do so, and when they shout "mra group wants to cut funding to women's shelter", everybody comes out to defend them - even if the men's group was trying to get funding for their own initiative not cut funding elsewhere - but cutting funding elsewhere is simply the reality.

You can see similar stuff play out it the things like pushes for equal parenting presumption, etc. It doesn't matter that it's "focusing on the positives for men", like making them more involved parents. It cuts into a source of power and influence and it is opposed by gigantic publicly funded feminist organizations.

You get the same thing with suicide initiatives. Funding for suicide prevention for men only is a non starter, despite 80% of suicides being male. If 80% of suicides were female, we'd be awash in women only suicide outreach. Most social initiatives are created and run by women, for women and resist any male only initiatives. Male outreach, if done at all, is tacked on as a afterthought and not custom programmed. (and usually handled by the same people that assume a guy calling in for help from an abusive spouse is obviously the abuser and deserves the appropriate treatment - the stories of treatment that a guy receives from these "help" places are truly horrifying)

The only way forward is to break the stranglehold on the discussion. That means directly opposing feminist organizations and refuting the lie that feminism is about equality. As I stated, feminism is "women's advocacy" and is sorely needed, but so is "men's advocacy" and feminism is denying it a seat at the table by claiming "equality".

As an aside:

> claiming stuff like the wage gap not being real,

The wage gap is very real. However, it can't be proven to be direct discrimination. After all (manageable, identifiable) factors are taken into account, the actual gap is on the order of 1-2% (at least in the stuff I have read).

It would be good for you to read up on this particular topic, because the biggest argument in MR isn't that the 'wage gap isn't real'

it's that this statement:

"Women get paid less for the same job" - is not true. That's been illegal for decades.

All the studies that show wage gaps compare groupings of professions, not "same job".

Most of those studies show that women choose lower paying careers, which might be because of social imbalance (ie, discrimination). One study claims that jobs women go into over time become lower paying, implying a discriminatory compensation social view. (I personally think that they ignored the very important changing nature of the job that they used to demonstrate this theory, but it's an interesting idea, nonetheless. )

No study shows "lower pay, same job". It's a great sound bite, but it's a lie.

[–]orcscorper 9 points10 points11 points 8 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link

Here's another comment for you: the wage gap isn't real. The wage gap is a lie. Equal pay has been the law for half a century. I know, I know. Not everyone follows the law. Some people illegally underpay women and get away with it. There are not enough examples of this to explain the 77¢ on the dollar, or whatever number feminists throw out, "for the exact same work". The 77¢ figure compares all full-time employees, whether they work 36 hours per week, or 72. Which gender do you think is more likely to put in the longer hours, and why should someone working much shorter hours doing similar work get paid as much?

If feminists want to address the earnings gap, they can focus in why it is that women dominate in 4 of the 5 lowest-earning college majors, and why men dominate in 4 of the 5 highest-earning majors. They could talk about what could be done to get more women in STEM, and why kindergarten teachers get paid so much less than engineers. And some do, but their voices are buried under the lie that women are being robbed of their hard-earned money by patriarchy.

The feminists that matter care not for the truth, because the truth is, Western women have it pretty darn good. And that doesn't sell books or seminars.

Edit: my favorite Karen Straughan (GirlWritesWhat) comment ever.

[–]FrostingsVII 8 points9 points10 points 8 years ago* (1 child) | Copy Link

Let us say stuff it, the wage gap is 100% real. Terrible. Boy, it gets a lot of attention, wouldn't you agree? What's the ratio of men to women dying at work? Do you know?

Do you think perhaps you should wonder why you don't know? Why don't you know? Self declared pursuer of equality with the self given label of moderate feminist.

Every man here could no doubt state a comprehensive list of issues women face. You simply can't exist and not know currently. Do you know what issues men face?

What kind of picture does that paint to you?

The thing that really shits me off is how can feminism be for equality when feminists have no fucking interest in the issues men face? Mmm? How can equality be achieved through utter chosen ignorance? It makes no sense. You can't attempt to gain equality with something you don't have any understanding of. The idea is absurd and a clear direct line to a shit ton of straight up fuck ups.

I'm here from all as well. I read everything that pops up. I have an extremely low opinion of nearly all the single gender dominated subs but I don't think these questions are unreasonable.

[–]Arby01 1 point2 points3 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]daymi 3 points4 points5 points 8 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]RapeMatters 2 points3 points4 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]RapeMatters 4 points5 points6 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I do not understand why promoting fairness for men has to involve dismissing unfairness against women. (And, to be clear, I understand that not all MRAs are like this. But there's a reason why an anti-feminist post gets 100+ upvotes on here)

I might be one of the most antifeminist posters around here, but I'm not dismissing unfairness against women. I'm antifeminist because the feminist movement has, repeatedly, tried to support, protect, and shield from consequences women are rapists and domestic abusers, via dodgy definitions, outright falsehoods, and infantilization of such abusers on the basis of them being female.

I can go into great detail, with links, if you would be interested at all, but it takes some time to make a post like that so I will only do it if you are interested in actually reading it.

I'm not antifeminist because I am unsympathetic towards unfairness women face. I applauded with the new Irish referendum - that was a good thing. I am antifeminist because I see feminism as a major supporter of rapists and domestic abusers who happen to be female, and I'm against that.

[–]Kill_Frosty[🍰] 4 points5 points6 points 8 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

[+]Drewfro666 -8 points-7 points-6 points 8 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]Lethn 10 points11 points12 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]Kill_Frosty[🍰] 1 point2 points3 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]Fuckoff555 4 points5 points6 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Everytime we have a post that gets to r/all, we get people who post the same thing as you and who asks the same question as you? And honestly it gets tiring to explain why we hate feminism as a movement this much (myself included) everytime a newcomer like you ask why?

So I will try to summarize for you why? Feminism has a lot and a lot of influence and power, at least in the West and in a lot of developed countries. And while this is a good thing because it has effectively helped women get their rights and become equal with men in a lot of fields, it's also a bad thing because with that influence and power, it has effectively labeled every person or organization, that criticize feminism when it goes full on hypocrite mode and hurts men, as misogynists, sexists or rape apologists. Shutting them all down in the process. They even sometimes use force or threats to shut down every one who speaks against them or who point up their hypocrisy, and no one bats an eye. And what do you get then? Some bunch of feminists who hurts men and advocate for female supremacy, with an open field because everyone who dare criticize them is immediately shut down, and they have so much influence and power that they can do so with ease. And the feminists who are supposedly for equality and who are supposedly against those man hating feminists, instead of holding the ones who hurts men accountable, they prefer defending feminism and standing against the people who dare to criticize it, saying the same old shit like ''feminism is for equality between men and women, and those feminazis don't represent feminism''. While all what they are actually doing is shielding them subconsciously, cause all those hypocrite man hating feminists are wreaking havoc in the background because it's them who have all that power that allows them to hurt men and achieve female supremacy as they like.

[+]letsRoll1121 points 8 years ago [recovered] (33 children) | Copy Link

This statement is wildy overgeneralised and sure there are women like that but to use things like they and them seems unfair to me

[+]totallya_russianbot1 points 8 years ago [recovered] (5 children) | Copy Link

Nice strawman you got there. They talk about twox'ers and feminists, but you read it as "women"? This is why people laugh at you.

[–]letsRoll112 -2 points-1 points0 points 8 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

[–]Lethn 9 points10 points11 points 8 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

[–]Ninagram 1 point2 points3 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]letsRoll112 1 point2 points3 points 8 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]Lethn 6 points7 points8 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

You can check out my post history, this is why I get so annoyed and pick fights with people who come here from /r/All without bothering to look at the overall sub. They're either completely misinformed idiots ( No offence meant to you, because you're at least making an attempt to talk to people here ) or they're feminists themselves looking to spam and slander this sub because they're scared of how popular it's getting.

The sub is nearing almost 180,000 subs now, so it's no coincidence we're getting brigaded again and I honestly believe there's no political group out there that gets slandered more than MRAs. Some of the shit other individuals have gone through is obviously pretty bad but I've found it remarkable how merely mentioning the word MRA is like mentioning the word Trump left wingers and feminists regard it as some sort of unspeakable term.

The good news is it doesn't matter how much slander goes on from 7 or so posters all ranting at once, it looks like most people are ignoring it and making their own judgements about the sub.

[+]Lethn1 points 8 years ago* [recovered] (26 children) | Copy Link

Then go and tell them to stop doing it to men then, I was find it amusing when people come over to this sub to bitch about men doing this but they never ever confront feminists on it.

[–]letsRoll112 2 points3 points4 points 8 years ago (12 children) | Copy Link

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[–]letsRoll112 2 points3 points4 points 8 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link

[–]Macheako[🍰] -1 points0 points1 point 8 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

Why would you go for a personal attack in a discussion that has nothing to do with you projecting piece of shit.

Because I was curious at how "Emotional" you would get over it. You proved me right. So I need to thank you.

Take a long hard look in the mirror and think about attacking random strangers on the internet to make you feel better and why you do it.

No. Cause everything I thought about this situation has only proven itself true. You're too emotionally frail to have this discussion. You're a liar if you continue to try having it with other people. I'm sorry man, but with no due respect, your fragility is YOUR problem, not mine. It isn't my responsibility to be "Concerned" with the fact that you're weak.

That's not my job. And I won't take the pay check either. Sorry, but you need to work on getting yourself a little tougher than you currently are. Words aren't hurtful unless you allow them to hurt, and they only way they CAN hurt.....is if you ignore them, when they're true.

Hope ya get better, man.

[–]letsRoll112 0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

[–]Macheako[🍰] -1 points0 points1 point 8 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

Being attacked, then leaving the conversation because you can't "get over" the fact that someone thinks you aren't the bee knees is very characteristic of someone who is.....emotionally frail.

Hell, at what point am I "Attacking you" vs simply "Telling you something negative about yourself"? Like at WHICH POINT am I "attacking" and at which point am I simply filling you in on something you seem wholly ignorant of concerning yourself? Should I not tell you there's a spider crawling up your back cuz then I'm insisiting you're too daft to pay attention to spiders? Should I not tell a child to go in the pool if they're unable to swim?

I said you were pussy whipped. Now, fuck yea you can take that as insulting, but again, WHERE IS THE LINE THAT YOU DRAW WHICH DICTATES MY INTENTION AS THAT OF WANTING TO HARM YOU VS SIMPLY TELLING YOU THAT YOU SUCK?

So you're basically telling me.....I'm not allowed to tell you that you suck.....

You're emotionally frail.

Thanks and bye.

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[+]Kefflin1 points 8 years ago* [recovered] (5 children) | Copy Link

For being a douche? Guy assaulted her and spending on the state it can go from battery to assault to sexual assault.

2 wrongs don't make a right, wtf happened to this sub that assaulting a women is a-ok.

[+]PM_ME_DIRTY_SPONGES1 points 8 years ago [recovered] (4 children) | Copy Link

Slapping someone's ass isn't sexual assault. Harassment? Absolutely. Not assault.

[+]TakuanNoho1 points 8 years ago [recovered] (2 children) | Copy Link

I am staunch MGTOW and even I agree that ass slapping outside of an athletic contest is sexual assault.

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She was drunk driving and claimed the cop sexually assaulted her. Without video evidence it would have ruined the guys life. She did not get charged for this false rape claim.

The butt slapper guy should be punished if course. But 1 year in prison? That's over 60k for the tax payers. After that he will have a hard time getting any kind of job, will be probably listed in a sex offender list. So the guys life is fucked and the tax payers will pay for it. A hefty fine would have been enough punishment, provided he isn't some serial offender. While fiminists will claim otherwise, the butt slapped lady will live. Like seriously, let's not act like a butt slap will traumatize a grown ass woman. Like Dave Chappelle said " if that is all it takes to break your spirit, that's a brittle ass spirit".

But going even further. Why the fuck is a butt slapping idiot a news worthy story? They are painting him as a monster. While he surly is an asshole, that all goes way too far.

[–]25511367325325869452 15 points16 points17 points 8 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link

[+]Kailu1 points 8 years ago [recovered] (4 children) | Copy Link

I don’t think it’s that bad so the punishment is too severe.

Hope you get molested dude. Let’s see how you feel after.

[–]Mortally_DIvine 8 points9 points10 points 8 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]25511367325325869452 5 points6 points7 points 8 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[+]-quenton-1 points 8 years ago [recovered] (7 children) | Copy Link

Before all the downvotes: I normally agree with many of the "male rights" efforts, but I think it's counterproductive and dangerous to defend this man.

Do you think this is the only time the butt slapper has done something like this? I'd guess no. And do you think a fine would actually change his behavior going forward? I'm doubtful. Speeding fines don't really stop people from speeding.

[–]todoke 10 points11 points12 points 8 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[+]-quenton-1 points 8 years ago [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link

I dont know, and so do you. Lets not pretend we know this guys life.

You say you're not defending him, but you are. You're suggesting this might've been the only he would've ever done something like this, and because of that, he should be given leniency.

The dude waited until his wife went to the bathroom before assaulting the waitress. He knew what he was doing. Of course I don't "know" his life, but I'd say it's pretty likely he's done something like this before. And I'd say it's pretty likely he'd do it again if he wasn't caught.

Yes i do. I would never slap someones ass again after a 10.000 $ fine.

If you were a billionaire, would you feel the same way?

[–]todoke 12 points13 points14 points 8 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link

You're suggesting this might've been the only he would've ever done something like this, and because of that, he should be given leniency.

Nope. Im saying you get charged for what you did, not what you might have done, not on what is "pretty likely" he has done before or other nonsense.

Of course I don't "know" his life, but I'd say it's pretty likely he's done something like this before.

Luckily the justice system doesn't operate like you think. Im not defending him. Saying "1 year seems fine since he probably did stuff like this before" is insane.

If you were a billionaire, would you feel the same way?

Any other silly unlikely scenario? Also you should know sentences are often give based on how much money you make. If you are rich you get fined according to how much you make so that it really hurts you.

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[–]Hypno_213 5 points6 points7 points 8 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link

I fully agree with todoke on this one. I understand where you're coming from, and why you think fines would merely be a purchase. But to carry on what you were saying about "what if you were a billionaire?" well think about the other consequences that follow after sexual assault accusations against anyone with that sort of money. It would get ridiculous media attention (Destroying their reputation) the fine would quite clearly be massive because it's based on the amount they earn (as todoke said) and who would ever hire this "billionaire" to do what ever job their profession entails? That's right, pretty much no one would.

I'm quite skeptical that a year of prison is a fair sentence for someone who patted a waitresses ass. It's completely absurd. Would you support the same sentence for a women who "assaulted" a man? (butt slapping, crotch grabbing etc.)

Edit: Just look at the situation with Morgan freeman; there's no evidence to support the claims against him, and yet his reputation is being torn apart because that media won't shut up about it. His career long reputation is being destroyed because of claims against him that may or may not be either over exaggerated or just completely false.

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I'm don't think slapping a woman's butt like that is good behaviour, but honestly 'sexual assault' is pushing it...

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[+]KralHeroin1 points 8 years ago [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link

Interesting... as far as I know in my country it's just sexual organs that constitues a sexual assault.

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Lol, I’m sorry, but this is the dumbest comment I’ve ever read

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This sub is as pathetic as MGTOW or Incels at this point. Hope you virgin fucks die.

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In the West today, it is the greatest of crimes if you're a straight white male. There will eventually be massive backlash if they keep up the attack on us to fulfill their sick Marxist-feminist agenda.

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Take your bullshit back to your nazi subreddits. That's not what this sub is about.

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[+]ItsNeverLupusDumbass1 points 8 years ago [recovered] (2 children) | Copy Link

Really dude? Don't drop down to the level of that dumbass, you are lowering the IQ of the entire sub.

[+]Look_at_the_idiot1 points 8 years ago [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link

Did you mean to reply to the guy above me?

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Ridiculous for a man to be arrested for coping a feel, but that bitch committed a far worse crime and gets off with nothing.

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Title	Well, at least it made the news that she got off free
Author	todoke
Upvotes	2795
Comments	197
Date	May 27, 2018 12:23 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/8mhf51/well_at_least_it_made_the_news_that_she_got_off/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/well-at-least-it-made-the-news-that-she-got-off.900556 https://theredarchive.com/post/900556

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