From a military mind... remember guys, you are on a mission in life. Whatever that mission may be. Making a career. Raising your kids. Doing badass things. The woman in your life is not your mission. You have a beautiful vision of the future that includes them. They should be going on the mission with you. If these devils don't want to go on your mission with you, then they are not your companion. They are hindering your mission. Yes, they should have their own mind and individuality, but they are to let you lead the mission and do whatever it takes to make it thrive and succeed. If they resist, if they try to take you on their mission, they are either a narcissist, delusional, doing the devil's bidding, or just not the right person for your mission. Find someone who wants to be on a mission with you or do it alone.