Being a nerd is bad?

Mehitobel · 2022-07-20T19:51:18+00:00

I’m a 43f. When my husband first walked into my apartment and saw that bookcases covered every wall, floor to ceiling, he knew I was going to be his wife.

There are women who are nerdy and love nerdy guys.

CastinDeviousStares · 2022-07-20T18:32:27+00:00

Hell no! I'm a nerdy woman and love nerdy guys. :) The conversations are way better and I have way more fun when we're into the same stuff. You may just have a high failure rate when it comes to dating if you go after the gorgeous women that are into vastly different things than you, but you'll likely do better in a similar category of the things you like.

unlivedbread · 2022-07-20T20:51:05+00:00

One of my brothers is a huge fucking nerd, plays with Lego into his late 20s yet has had girls all over him since I can remember, i dont actually recall him ever not having a gf, they were all good looking too. He ain't even that good looking himself. He really just doesn't give a fuck what people think

FeatheredCanine · 2022-07-21T00:42:26+00:00

I mean… I can only speak for myself but I think nerdy boys are absolutely adorable, what’s not to like about someone intelligent and passionate about something. They’re honestly my type and I’d choose them any day of the week over some asshole emotionally distant “Chad” who’s only interested in himself. (What pisses me off is that redpillers will literally accuse me of lying to make nerdy men feel better and that I deep down crave a Chad who treats me like shit but I really, truly don’t.)

whatarechimichangas · 2022-07-21T01:45:33+00:00

It's very important to remember that women are NOT a hivemind. We are people like you who have our own interests, dreams, passion, insecurities, and flaws. Yes, it's true that some women might not like nerds in the same way that some men might not like nerds. It's also true that some women will also like nerds in the same way that some men will like nerds. Stop looking at us like we're somekind of governing board that gets together to decide what is and isn't attractive. We're not a bunch of shallow catty bitches who talk shit about nerds and fuck jocks, this isn't a high school movie.

Honestly, claiming to be a nerd these days just because you are interested more in science and philosophy more than mainstream popculture or whatever other general interests is not uncommon anymore. There are tons of people like you. There are also tons of people who enjoy science and philisophy AND other things that are not considered nerdy. I love history and I have so many books on biblical criticism and the ancient middle east, but I also like going to the gym and binging Netflix. They're not mutually exclusive. IMO it's less about what interests you and more about how well you can share your passions with other people.

ValakDaOG · 2022-07-20T20:07:50+00:00

Maybe im the only one whos found a good middle ground?? Ive found girls like a nice middle ground. A mixture of nerdy/educated and street wise. And knowing when to show those sides is also important. But at the end of the day be yourself.

Naus1987 · 2022-07-21T00:52:36+00:00

People are unique. There are lots of nerdy women who love nerdy guys.

The key is not to be an idiot. Don’t chase the pretty blonde doing non nerdy stuff lol. Don’t chase women just on their looks.

2022-07-20T20:17:24+00:00

Find nerdy women. They love nerdy men.

SweelFor- · 2022-07-20T16:59:03+00:00

What about reading books and watching videos do you think makes it hard to get a girlfriend?

For example, you are on a date at a restaurant, how does this come up and how does it make the date bad?

Now you are going out to swim. You are in the pool swimming, how do the videos you watch make it hard for the woman to enjoy this date?

You found someone else. You talk to her between classes. How does the history book you read yesterday make this conversation more difficult?

Big-Bonkin-Head · 2022-07-21T01:31:35+00:00

It’s all about confidence and finding your style. The nerds girls like are guys who smell good, own their hobbies, dominant, social and outgoing.

It may help that I’m. 6’5 for sure but I love all the nerdy shiz. I like comic books, video games, astronomy, mangas, computer science and everything. I love learning as well. But I own it, and I also found women who didn’t judge that shiz. Im not about to lay up with a woman who judges me for the things I like. When I was single, not slaying left and right, I’m not one to sleep around constantly like that but I definitely had women coming for me but I owned it all.

Own your style, be outgoing and be kind. But also have a gentleman like seduction to. You as wellX

n0name1026 · 2022-07-21T01:46:20+00:00

Its about where you are. If you spend a lot of time going to things like TED talks or join Facebook groups about topics youre interested in, you will eventually run into single women who are in that group who might want to get to know you. Its a stereotype that women aren't into traditionally 'nerd' interests. I put it on the same level as the assumption that 90% of men are either into sports or video games.

mylesaway2017 · 2022-07-21T03:30:27+00:00

Women can be nerds too.

2022-07-20T21:41:36+00:00

No. Nerds are my type. I can’t stand to be around unintelligent people without curiosity about the world or without the context of most of human history in the back of their minds. If you want to find a girlfriend who likes nerds and won’t have massive expectations of you socially, just date an autist like me. I used to read the dictionary for fun. Plenty of us also like to play video games.

SithQueenGigi · 2022-07-20T23:53:21+00:00

I love nerdy stuff and I have dated nerdy guys in the past. So no biggie I do think it's more well accepted and cool nowadays to be classified as one.

moustachelechon · 2022-07-21T00:30:21+00:00

I’m a woman and my partner and I love to nerd out to stuff together, we both like talking about philosophy and science. He’s a big history buff and I love hearing him talk about it, I mostly discuss gemology and animal behavior with him. I think having interests to talk about or being a nerd isn’t a detractor at all in a relationship, it may even be a bonus.

DarkestTimeline24 · 2022-07-21T01:10:56+00:00

The world doesn’t operate as it is depicted in high school movies. Intelligent people don’t have any problem finding partners. And nerd culture has become very mainstream in recent years.

beigs · 2022-07-21T03:49:27+00:00

Nerdy woman married to a nerdy man. We find each other :)

vcreativ · 2022-07-21T14:13:27+00:00

Nope, that's fine. Also what's the alternative here, to contort your personality in the hope to correspond to some generic ideal that generic women might like? How is that an alternative? I should add, women aren't uniform, so to answer your question, some women might find it bad, others will not.

Good or bad, you can only be yourself and discover who that is. Believe me, if you look deep enough you'll find that you have all of the tools you need.

Hobbies or interests aren't dealbreakers bar exceptional cases.

As a suggestion, though, find some people that you can discuss your stuff with. If you never meet anyone, and don't have friends, just realistically, you'll have a hard time meeting a woman you care about.

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throwaway2392384 · 2022-07-20T19:13:24+00:00

Scientist here. Being interested in science and being passionate about science is good. Being a scientist is bad: nobody want's a 35 year old who works 60 hours per week for barely more than minimum wage.

Alarming_Book9400 · 2022-07-21T13:04:09+00:00

This is the most bets male shit I've ever heard in my life. Grow up, be a fucking man and stop worrying so much about what others think of you, loser

debatelord_1 · 2022-07-20T16:56:15+00:00

Does being a nerd make you a bad person? No, of course not.

Is it attractive to women? No.

XihuanNi-6784 · 2022-07-21T11:18:59+00:00

This hasn't been true for about 15 years now. Popular culture now, generally, accepts msot forms of what was called nerd stuff. ALthough politics and history didn't count as that nerdy before anyway.

hustledontstop · 2022-07-21T11:36:09+00:00

You are definitely an INTP Luckily there are some hot ENFJ women out there who would love a nerdy INTP

Brilliant_Guava_9646 · 2022-07-21T21:07:15+00:00

It's not bad to be a nerd.

2022-07-22T14:48:19+00:00

Now im the kind of person who sincerely enjoys to read complex
philosophy books and see videos of politics or history. This is good for
me, but i feel bad because i know is not the kind of person that have a
lot of friends

Philosopher here (or at least I used to be) you'd be surprised at the number of philosophers at the graduate level who aren't "nerds."

They are definitely all obsessed with philosophy, but many of them are otherwise not stereotypically nerdy. I am, but I was actually kind of an outlier. You can read John Rawls and Kant and still be athletic or very social.

I have a ton of friends and am very social, but I'm also a nerd who plays a lot of video/board games and reads fantasy fiction often. It's not nerdy interests that prevent you from making friends, It's the lack of trying to make friends (or not wanting to). You may be an introvert, or have social anxiety, or are not neurotypical, or something similar, that's leading to you not having a lot of friends, but I assure you interest in philosophy isn't the thing holding you back.

It can be hard to get a girlfriend and maintain a relationship if you don't work on your social skills. Kant and Newton were amazing philosophers, but they let their obsession with study interfere with their ability to socialize. They both died alone. John Rawls and AJ Ayer were happily married men until their deaths and were very social. Bertrand Russell was a notorious womanizer and was married three times and had many affairs. Wittgenstein was never married and being bisexual had relationships with many men and women over the years.

There is nothing really wrong with being a shut-in, but you have to acknowledge that it will hurt the development of your social skills. For many people, that's a trade-off they are willing to make. However, if your worried about finding a partner, it's a good idea to work on your social skills as well as spending time learning about truth and knowledge.

Title	Being a nerd is bad?
Author	sharedordaz
Upvotes	22
Comments	52
Date	July 20, 2022 4:37 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/ExRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/exredpill/comments/w3qwus/being_a_nerd_is_bad/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/ExRedPill/being-a-nerd-is-bad.1124534 https://theredarchive.com/post/1124534

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