This was several years ago -- my boyfriend at the time was crashing at my temp corporate housing I recieved from my new job. I tossed our clothes in the laundry for us one day, and when he went to go move them from the washer to the dryer, he realized his leather wallet had been washed.

He had apparently forgetten to take it out of his pocket. At the time, my reaction was something along the lines of "oh no, it happens, it'll mostly be okay when it dries." He was really upset about it because it was expensive and something he got with an old friend -- understandable -- but what I didn't understand was when he started getting cross with me. Basically blaming me for not checking the pockets of his pants before putting it in the wash, which I responded saying that I wouldn't even think to check since women don't have functional pockets and that it's on him to check his clothes before putting them in the hamper.

We argued about this for a while and then he claims he expected me to apologize for my part in it, since I was the one who put the clothes in the washer and I clearly wasn't showing responsibility for my actions and their consequences to him. I just let it go and told him I was sorry for washing his wallet, and even though I never really got his perspective, a part of me was left wondering that maybe I was in the wrong and maybe I wasn't being compassionate, empathetic, or otherwise a good person in that moment.

Anyway, now thanks to FDS I feel a lot more confident that it wasn't a situation I needed to apologize for at all. I wasn't his mom! and he was plenty old enough to know to empty his pockets! Like, there's only yourself to blame in that situation and girlfriends aren't just there to accept responsibility on your behalf. And of course, no more letting boyfriends live with me before a large commitment or helping with their chores 🙄

Just wanted to share this since I remembered that time and am annoyed I never got any apology from him for taking it out on me lol