Thinking of ghosting a LVM

mightbethrowawayyy · 2020-04-25T17:39:46+00:00

Just ghost his ass. You don’t owe him anything. Plus he clearly doesn’t respect you, so you don’t have to be nice to him either

lonelybones1 · 2020-04-25T17:40:34+00:00

Just ghost him, he's a trashcan and he doesn't deserve anything better. Women need to stop making excuses and care about "men's feelings". They don't give a shit about our feelings so why should we care about theirs?

TheOGJammies · 2020-04-25T17:35:54+00:00

I’m super pro ghosting. You don’t owe men an explanation. I ghost because I’m not trying to get cussed out by text or by phone by some male with a paper thin ego, nor do I want him to obsessively try and argue me down to negotiate why he deserves more of my time, attention, and pussy. 90% of times when you tell a man you’re not interested after a date some fuckery ensues. I ghost now because men are insane.

The only time I provide an explanation is if the person otherwise earned my respect but we’re just incompatible.

Milobear27 · 2020-04-25T17:38:39+00:00

Do it. Don’t forget to block!

lynette-scavo · 2020-04-25T17:55:35+00:00

Giving him any other explanation about the relationship makes him perfect his act and will make him land the next victim with finesse. Just block him girl.

throwahweigh3521 · 2020-04-25T20:14:57+00:00

Ghosting isn’t brutal it’s strategic.

This is a man that you cannot COmmUNiCaTE with and his behavior demonstrated he does not value you in an acceptable way to mutually resolve issues.

If you give him the “it’s not working out” explanation or the passive aggressive “it’s me, not you” talk then it’s his turn to provide feedback. Right?

Why create a platform for him to vent his feelings or worse?

Is there anything (?!?) else you need to know? You’re done so why fake nice an ending for a not nice guy?

My ideas about ghosting evolved. At first I just did it without thinking - I was reacting to the intolerable.

And then I read lots of essays about ghosting and let myself be convinced that it was immoral to ghost. I let guilt be my guide. And then I had a whole bunch of really unnecessary experiences.

Here’s the thing: women are not a collective social service agency that is ethically and morally obligated to teach men how to behave with nicey nice breakups and lessons about “relationships”.

Men are not our students, children, or responsibility- and when we dump them they are not even friends. Facts are men get angry and aggressive- they’ve been socialized to limited emotions. We don’t owe them space for break up closure and subsequent nonsense.

Ghosting is the option. All the anti ghosting rhetoric assumes a whole bunch of things we’d love to be true but are not. Ghosting is not nice or kind. It’s not pretending that the other person deserves a gold plated let down.

Ghosting eliminates emotional labor. That inherently unfair extra added value tax that women are expected to pay that is unseen and never acknowledged by male recipients.

Ghosting ends a relationship. It’s safe, final and has no extra added brain damage.

Ghosting is winning.

radical__daphne · 2020-04-25T17:56:16+00:00

If he's a jerk you don't have to explain anything to him if you don't want to, just block and delete.

DaeYeNoKen · 2020-04-25T18:58:55+00:00

Do it. He sounds like a complete turd who's looking for free sex and therapy while he tries to get back with or is still fucking his ex. You deserve better.

hilariouslystated · 2020-04-25T18:10:31+00:00

Ghost him. 👻👻👻👻

cherrybombfield · 2020-04-25T19:53:36+00:00

[deleted]

wanderluster369 · 2020-04-25T20:41:16+00:00

Ghost him now. I dated a guy last summer that lovebombed me all month then all of sudden he told me all things I didn't like about me. I went from being an upgrade to his ex to him being engaged to his ex. Don't date a guy fresh out of relationship and one who can put you down so early.

pissed_af · 2020-04-25T18:52:49+00:00

Ghosting is not a terrible thing to do, he doesn't care about you why should you tiptoe around his non existent feelings for you?

Davina33 · 2020-04-25T18:54:13+00:00

Do it! He sounds like a right arsehole. Don't even give the fella an explanation.

BlueJeanMistress · 2020-04-25T19:54:14+00:00

Do it! He doesn’t deserve one last word, thought or minute of your time!

villagefunambulist · 2020-04-25T20:29:41+00:00

He is not extending you basic human respect and decency. Normal people don't even cancel appointments last minute multiple times - let alone dates! Say, if I were to cancel on my hairdresser last minute, let's say twice, she would not book me a third time because she knows her time is valuable, she no longer wants to lose income since someone else can be booked in that slot and she no longer trusts me as a client. Respect your time! And by ghosting him, you would actually be taking the high road - moving on with your life while viewing him as an empty space - one that does not warrant an explanation, attention or even a thought.

cherrybombfield · 2020-04-25T22:39:18+00:00

Just do it he sounds awful. It will suck at first and you will feel like crap but then it will pass and you will feel a million times better having this dead weight out of your energy.

girludontbringhome · 2020-04-25T17:46:33+00:00

I would just send a very simple text like “This is not going to work, I am no longer interested.” And then block.

DazzlingMolasses7 · 2020-04-26T07:54:01+00:00

I’m not against this but think of this of this for practicality

If he is the type of man to go insane on you and show up at your house, he will do it whether or not you ghost him.

If he is the type of man who is usually less violent, if you ghost him, he might still show up because of ego.

For your own safety, send him a text saying it’s over (“it’s over” is enough) and then block him. It won’t change the first situation but at least you might be able to save yourself the hassle of the second one.

stovetop_bellbottom · 2020-04-26T14:42:47+00:00

Better to be the bigger person, tell him you have to let him go and then block. Also makes him less likely to pursue you. A few times I’ve ghosted or unmatched and it’s made them stalk me and try harder... they act as if it was some sort of mistake or they’re confused. This way I think it’s pretty clear what’s happening.

SuchBarracuda · 2020-04-26T08:00:35+00:00

Look at it this way... men ghost all of the time with no afterthought about how it affects you... why should you care about how they feel.. he clearly isnt that interested.. I learned the super hard way about dudes with attractive female friends or exes that they still have floating around casually .. oh they may truly not be I terested in them now but all it takes is one night... ghost the mf

BrooklynBabe33 · 2020-04-26T13:15:55+00:00

I’m a fan of “this isn’t working for me”.

Don’t wait for a response.

Block. Delete.

rochelledot · 2020-04-25T22:51:50+00:00

You're right, this guy is an asshole. What you have described sounds like blatant disrespect. I wouldn't waste the energy nor effort in "breaking up" with him, ghosting is the most reasonable solution in those case. He deserves no other explanation.

Title	Thinking of ghosting a LVM
Author	DartyGal503
Upvotes	48
Comments	37
Date	April 25, 2020 2:39 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/g7ujg8/thinking_of_ghosting_a_lvm/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/thinking-of-ghosting-a-lvm.677582 https://theredarchive.com/post/677582

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