Summary/Tl;Dr: Came across this subreddit about 5-6 days ago when it was subreddit of the day. Got hooked reading the sidebar. Discovered how beta I am. Got rid of most unproductive shit in my life. Starting lifting again. Asked a girl out on a date, went absolutely shit, was cringy af.

Love this stuff already.

BODY

Post is going to be pretty long, and I will try to sum it all up as much as possible. If you decide to read through it and leave me your thoughts I would appreciate that so much!

Little bit about me:

I'm a 17 year old guy, and probably the most beta possible. Since Highschool I have been a non-stop orbiter of multiple girls. Wasted so much time playing useless video-games that my eyes have become nearsighted. Smoked a lot of pot and drank a lot of alcohol to try and escape reality; that I am nothing but a wanking piece of shit with no value whatsoever. Tried to sum it up as best as I can.

But then

I came across this (tried linking but submission got removed twice) post on TRP being subreddit of the day. Never heard of TRP before. The post had a lot of mixed comments, both praising this subreddit and hating on it. The hateful comments were complete BS, mostly just emotional arguments, while some of the subreddit members commented things I found interesting. So I thought fuck it, why not. Read through the side-bar, soaked it up like a spunge. Quickly this world that I had always tried to fit into, but which never worked out for me, fell apart. Things finally started to make sense. To be honest it felt really good and really fucking shit. Rage was flowing through my body and mind. Couldn't really think straight so I decided to lift some steel in the gym, which I hadn't visited in about 6-7 months. When I was done I felt a little better. Got rid of my LoL account (I played about 40 hours a week, if not more). Felt really fucked up, I vomited when the confirmation e-mail came through.

Next days

Tried as much as I could to 'fix' my SMV. I looked like a fucking homeless kid. So I got a haircut, some actual decent clothes and a pair of shoes. Bought Buff Dudes' latest 12Week plan, went to the gym again.

Re-read the sidebar religiously and started watching RSD Tyler's videos. One of his videos talked about too much information actually being counterproductive.

And so I went out that night with my 'friends'. The bars that do allow younger guys are absolute crap. The girls are beyond trashy & slutty, I won't even get started on the guys.

The anonymity is good though, I wasn't planning on going out in the day, possibly making a fool out of myself and digging an even deeper hole. Approached about 8 girls until I called it quits. The first approach was so terrifying. There I was, shaking, my voice trembling, I felt like vomiting. Got turned down pretty cold.

Tapped her lightly on the shoulder. I had previously only seen her from behind so when she turned around I got even more nervous. This girl was way out of my league. First thing that came up to me was "I like your glasses, makes you look smarter.". As I said this I was cringing so hard from inside.

Doesn't matter anyway, first thing she said was "I don't talk to strangers." Don't know why you would say that considering you are in a bar but whatever (shit test?). She walked away and I had no idea what to say. Somehow I felt so great though. Going out of my comfort zone like that felt pretty good. Next approaches went better and better.

I got two numbers and I'm pretty proud of that, even though it's not much. One of the girls just never texted back when I tried to hit her up. Luckily, one did. Started looking up on here what I should say blablabla. Couldn't really find anything good for beginners on that topic so I just did my own thing. Next day I asked her out and she said yes!

The date

I was very hyped about this, but I tried not to get too much into my head. Had one pre-drink before I picked her off at work (on a bike, don't worry I don't drink and drive). The approach itself was already shitty, she was walking up to me looking at her phone.

I told her that "my eyes are up here". She laughed and I gave her a hug. After that I took her out to a healthy-food joint in my area. Things were okay in the start. We ordered food and talked a bit. Tried to get to know her better by asking what does she do for fun etc. Made statements instead of directly asking a question to avoid this turning into an interview as I read on here a few times.

The thing is that I was not getting much back except for maybe 3-4 words. This felt so fucking shit. What was I doing wrong? At some point I just had no idea what else to say and things got really awkward. Supposedly I shouldn't stay 'in my head', but my mind was just blank. I had nothing to say anymore. Don't really know how I can improve on that, I guess by getting more experience but hell I'm not doing that shit again if it's this awkward. After 5 minutes of awkwardly eating in silence I told her I had to go, paid the bill and got out. Felt cringy about it while going home and still do.

Final words

This journey so far has been one hell of an experience. Even though some things do feel like shit, the idea of improving myself is really worth it. I'm still surprised how fast the last few days have gone. It's going to be one heck of a job to get out of the shit hole that I am in, and I can't wait to see where I will be in a few years from now.

Now that I've had a small taste of the truth and of all these possibilities, I know that I will never let go and I will never go back. I am looking forward to contributing to this subreddit. Thank you guys!

EDIT:

Thank you for all the comments, I've definitely gotten some really useful tips. Going to continue the grind and see where I end up!

If any other new guys that discovered TRP are looking for a chat just hit me up in PM and I'll try to help with whatever you're going through.