Per BobbyPeru's advice I'm posting on the retard sub.

Quick backstory for those unfamiliar. I've been a retard Rambo for quite awhile. This has resulted in strain on my marriage, and my common law wife started sleeping downstairs 2 weeks ago. I was chatting to other girls for validation, trying to active dread her (retard). It blew up.

I stopped trying so hard, started having fun, caring less. A few days ago I told her look, either we put all this bullshit behind us and you move upstairs and we fix this, or we don't. I want to stay married, what is your choice? After saying I don't know and failing to choose, I pressed for a decision, and her decision was no. I accepted it, decided right then and there I will be ok with this divorce, and can focus on fixing my shit solo. I gave her a hug, said my goal is to get through this as amicably as possible for our kids sake, and started processing what this will entail. For a couple days I came to terms with this. It wasn't what I had wanted, but I accepted it and was feeling good.

I did some deep introspection on why I went Rambo retard, and why I have struggled with this mrp journey, why I seek validation so badly. The main thing I came up with, is a deep seated self hatred from childhood. I've decided to start CBT therapy to change these mental models.

Back on topic, a few days later, a few shit tests about sleeping downstairs, a few snarky comments that I didn't show any reaction to. She again left her journal out open on the counter for hours, intentionally for me to read. It asked me to please choose us, how badly and deeply she's always loved me, she wants to show me but is terrified I'll hurt her again etc.

I gave the woman a hug. She started crying. Telling me she loves me so much, please don't leave her, she's always loved me, swears she never slept with anyone, etc. Suddenly completely submissive. Starts grabbing at me, kissing me wildly. Tears off her clothes, soaked. Obviously fucked, crazy passionate. BJ. Begs for my cum. Tells me she was masturbating to me the other night, says her pussy belongs to me. You get the idea. At the time I was shocked, I wasn't sure what was going on. I thought is this the main event? It can't be. I'm still not worth that.

Bobby told me it was hysteric bonding, of course it is. It's temporary. It will fade, she will test me. If I fail, she will quickly go back to miserable and distant.

I currently feel conflicted. On one hand, I do want to keep my marriage. When I reflected on it, I like my wife. I don't want to take the easy way out and fly solo. I want to fix my shit.

The other hand, I haven't shown I have the frame to maintain this reset. I have to focus on myself. I have to do my therapy. I know her behavior is just temporary cognitive dissonance.

Looking for advice on whether I can turn this into a positive, or if I'm fucked and should cut my losses. I'm not asking what you think I should do. I am asking for wisdom and perspectives that I can use to make my own decision.