Any advice on tinder game?

Atuli · 2016-08-01T09:46:18+00:00

NEVER. Open with a question.

Seriously when is this fucking sub going to get it into their heads you don't need to play into the girls fucking bio or anything.

I litteraly use one opener and it's Name I'm pretty sure ya supposed to try seduce me now.

After that seriously just flirt a bit and try sort out logistics as soon as possible, remember they're on tinder because they are bored RIGHT NOW.

DON'T MENTION SEX. It's a sex app any girl pretending otherwise is full of shit and you should ignore that completely. Sex is already in the subtext.

If she starts to resist and it sounds like she's convincing herself to come over just pull back and build comfort but be challenging. (Oh damn you seemed fun but maybe I was wrong)

I always go for my house or theirs and only try and arrange a drink somewhere with good logistics after they've declined that. The reason for this is showing her you're not some beta guy on there looking for a girlfriend, you get what you want first and then if you like her you can go from there..

Be prepared for flakes. Seriously if she flakes just keep swiping an forget it. Maybe hit her up again when logistics are good for you. It's genuinely nothing personal they just get so many matches it's hard to keep track of which again is why you need to work fast.

Don't court her over tinder it's seriously a waste of time. Strike while the irons hot.

disposable_pants · 2016-08-01T15:24:42+00:00

Here's the Tinder routine I've used with a lot of success. It's good at reducing flakes, and while I get a few first-date lays out of it, usually it gets me laid on the second or third date and has the added benefit of almost always leading into a 3-4 month casual relationship (if I wanted to make one of those more serious I likely could). The general pattern is:

Mundane opener -- it's really not important.
Ask how long she's lived in [insert city].
Ask how much of the city she's explored.
Once she's talking about different places around town, suggest that you go to one of them and set up logistics.

I'll go into a bit more detail on how this actually plays out and the reasoning behind this -- this example is verbatim from setting up a recent date that went quite well:

Me: "Hey! Were you up to anything fun over the weekend? That three-digit heat was phenomenal!" Yes, I start out with a question and yes, it's about something mundane -- usually the weather. The idea here is that profile pictures are 90%+ of what determines whether a woman will respond, and women who are already attracted to my pictures are the ones I want to focus on anyway. If she likes how you look she'll respond to a mundane question; if she doesn't she won't, and you don't want to waste time on the latter group anyway. Just make some small joke (e.g. "three-digit weather") so you show at least a little personality. One other small note -- match the enthusiasm/punctuation you use in your first message to the style she has on her profile. If it's written with a ton of exclamation points and is generally upbeat, she'll respond to that; if it's more low-key she'll respond to that.
Her: "I actually went to [other city] to see brand new and modest mouse! What about you?" It's not really important what she says here. Generally speaking longer answers on her part are better and show more interest. Note how she's using exclamation points back at me; clearly that's how she usually texts and now we seem to already be on the same page.
Me: "There's never a bad time to go to [other city -- it's a really fun town]... I went climbing and played a bit of sand volleyball. Still dehydrated haha. [second text] How long have you been in [our city]?" Keep joking around a little bit (e.g. "still dehydrated") and D higher V (e.g. outgoing activities like climbing and volleyball). Most importantly, keep progressing toward logistics. A small note on breaking out the operative question into a second text -- you don't want to send multiple texts back to her one, but I've found that having a clear conversation driver/scripted text separate from a comfort building/conversation making text often allows you to keep multiple conversation threads going at the same time without having it feel she's responding to a paragraph. Imagine how you might complete a full thought in person and then tack on a little coda at the end.
Her: "I bet it was way too hot and for two years now I'm originally from [nearby city.]" Note how she's responding both to the operative question ("how long have you been in town") and carrying on the conversation ("I bet that was too hot"). That's the goal; make it easy for her by setting up both.
Me: "It might have been a little toasty haha... how much of [our city] have you explored so far? [second text] And I'm either flying over or driving through [her hometown] in September -- climbing trip up in Denver!" Two texts, two parts of the conversation. As long as they're brief this works fine. Small joke, D higher V (outgoing hobby, travel), keep moving along in the script.
Her: "Honestly not too much I stay pretty busy with work and go to school full-time:/ and that sounds awesome! [second text] Do you live in [our city]?" Now she's using the two text convention; she's stepping into my frame. The conversation is boring (I'm busy, I go to school and work but am providing no fun/interesting details) but that's not the worst thing in the world -- it builds comfort and reduces flakes, and you can always dig for details to continue that side of the conversation. Most importantly, if she's having a mundane conversation with you she's interested in you, not just the conversation.
Me: "I work up in [our city] but live close to [nearby city]... bad commute, but I do get to check out a lot of cool places in both areas. What do you study? [second text] And if you haven't gotten out a ton up here, let's go explore a little!" Hint that you know a lot of fun places (higher value), carry on the comfort side of the conversation ("What do you study?" -- dig for details), and suggest the idea of going somewhere without specifics. If you ask her about a specific place and time (e.g. bar X on Thursday at 9:00) and she says no, you don't always get a good feel for whether she's turning down the place, the day, the time, or you altogether. Starting with the broad concept and narrowing it down also seems more organic.
Her: "I'm getting my bachelors in biology and I'm down! I love exploring that's why I picked biology as a field of study!" She's in -- from here it's just nailing down a date and time.

The overall idea is to A) screen out women who aren't physically interested in you up front, and B) build enough comfort while working towards logistics that you keep the flake rate low. In short, it's a better use of time to go on a few dates with high potential for turning into sex/relationships than to use routines/scripts that will get more women, but far more flakes and tougher dates.

Patsboem · 2016-08-01T13:21:59+00:00

Contrary to the most upvoted comment here, I always open with a question and I've had a lot of success. More often than not does it result in a fun unique conversation. Start with "Hey, can I ask you something personal?", to which she will reply yes 95% of the time, and follow up with something incredibly silly like ""what's your top four vegetables?" She will likely respond and you can take it in any direction you want from there.

There's no theory or anything behind it. It just works.

SunDevilElite42 · 2016-08-01T15:58:20+00:00

I find Tinder to be more difficult than real life. If you can make fun conversation and aren't intimidated of approaching women than your more likely to get action in my opinion. You can't convey body language or add the "touch" element when your on tinder. My rate of flaking is far far less when I first meet them in person rather than meeting them on Tinder, there is just an uneasy feeling deep inside meeting up with someone you have never met before. Lastly I can't tell you how much girls fluff there profiles. Meaning 99% of the time time they look way better on the cell phones rather than in real life. Remember this "8, 9s and 10s don't use tinder" they may have one but they don't use it, they don't need it.

Psychoticktock · 2016-08-01T12:12:55+00:00

As quick as you can establish an inside joke or secret joke between you two. A role play. You come up with it off her bio (recommended) but make it exciting and ridiculous to get attention.

I've been trying "This marriage is a lie and I've never loved you" as an opener. i*f she doesn't immediately make up her side as the wife roleplay (best outcome since you can create your own little story) continue to "I'm leaving with Dave"... "Dave is the dog I'm taking him with me" and if none of that gets a response then I've got nothing for now other than "Stop sending all these messages in invisible ink switch back to regular text thx".

This is just one example but you need to establish roleplays quickly because it allows a much easier transition into meeting up.

"So when should we meet up to discuss the divorce papers/marriage counselling. What's your number/facebook"

Then once you have the new medium you can immediately say something fun as part of the roleplay as the first line and seamlessly transition into more organic conversation.

This is very effective with smarter girls but not all girls are good bullshitters and roleplayers so I'm open to other routines.

Anyone who has an idea feel free to put it as a reply before you forget it.

Psychoticktock · 2016-08-01T12:17:55+00:00

I also think some storytelling routines that indicate higher value would be very useful here.

Anyone have some amazing stories that tick DHV boxes?

questionthis · 2016-08-01T14:44:32+00:00

Make a knock knock joke that ends in getting her number. I have a friend who swears by the strategy of "letting them message you first," but he infinitely swipes right and has much lower standards than I do.

glassuser · 2016-08-01T19:11:13+00:00

Strike hard. Strike fast. Show no mercy!

greatmikeshark · 2016-08-01T22:22:58+00:00

Lift. Lift some more and lift

liron00 · 2016-08-05T20:03:26+00:00

I made a website to help people figure out how to open and what to say on Tinder: https://nosy.chat

If you want to post a screenshot there, I'll personally help you craft a custom opener for your specific girl.

maxreynolds420 · 2016-08-01T22:35:47+00:00

I strongly disagree with the top comment. Asking a question to open up a conversation gives the conversation an immediate subject, and by choosing the correct questions, you can dominate the conversation and steer it in the direction you want almost immediately. Women LOVE talking about themselves. That's a fact. By asking them questions, you can create instant interest with them. It's Tinder for fucks sake. Go balls to the walls. But ask some questions so they stay interested.

x0diego0x · 2016-08-01T16:32:37+00:00

Have a large penis and be attractive.

Psychoticktock · 2016-08-01T09:34:50+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Psychoticktock · 2016-08-01T11:10:42+00:00

[permanently deleted]

NoMoreNewb · 2016-08-01T16:13:03+00:00

Pictures are everything. No group photos. Plus don't mention the fact that you're on Tinder in the convo, it'd make her uncomfortable.

Title	Any advice on tinder game?
Author	My3centsItsWorthMore
Upvotes	175
Comments	71
Date	August 1, 2016 9:00 AM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/4vlkzw/any_advice_on_tinder_game/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/any-advice-on-tinder-game.1410337 https://theredarchive.com/post/1410337

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