Cold approach help

punkbenRN · 2022-07-03T09:20:18+00:00

These answers are terrible. I get the feeling these guys don't actually cold approach anyone.

It's all about context and setting. How did they react? Are they smiling to be polite, or did you make their day? Are you in a grocery store or in a bar?

If they seemed to receive it positively, start by introducing yourself. It's just that simple. From there, you can make small talk - how was your day/come here often? I haven't seen you around, I'd remember you/what are your plans for the day? Give them an opportunity to either get engaged in the conversation, or to disengage and gently excuse themselves. Don't treat it like a job interview and start asking very personal questions, and don't just throw out a million compliments, no matter how hot they are. Just light banter, get a feel for the energy. If you think it feels good, ask for their number. That immediately let's them know you're interested, and you can get an answer up front if it's worth continuing the pursuit or not.

Good luck out there, and remember, just relax. Women are people too, and the more you do it the easier it gets.

burakbenxd · 2022-07-03T07:31:36+00:00

Don’t be fucking weird basically

Snoo-75281 · 2022-07-03T07:34:36+00:00

Cold approaching is a skill that you'll only get good at by practicing.

No_Bite_7238 · 2022-07-03T09:00:45+00:00

And thats why you'll fail more often in the long run when it comes to all this; You thinking you know what a woman is thinking.

The Cliche of women wanting to be sweet and proper and innocent is over. Why do you think the Bad-Boy always wins? He's interesting, he's original, he's not afraid to say whats on his mind, he keeps her on her toes while remaining unpredictable at the same time.

You don't have to be disrespectful, rude, or condescending. You have to stand out.

I guarantee you that she gets told that "Cute" line or something similar to it on a regular basis.

How do I know? Because, I actually used a pick-up line that worked great while getting information and keeping her engaged. "I have a question that only you can give me an honest answer to. How do you like getting hit on by guys?"

And just to keep the conversation going longer ill ask, "Do you want to be told your Cute or Sexy?"

JanetInSC1234 · 2022-07-03T11:44:44+00:00

I'm a woman and I have to say this predatory approach would creep me out. Don't call a stranger cute. The best you can do is smile shyly and comment about the environment or ask a question like, "What's good here."

sadsincity · 2022-07-03T12:26:33+00:00

Its hard to lay out a scenario because each one is different but I read in another comment you take public transportation/walk. Also note practice makes perfect so dont wait until your “perfect” girl is there for your first run.

But say you’re in public and in proximity to pretty girl. You can strike up a casual convo with her over something relatable to the moment like if someone is acting strange as you see in public transit you could be like “look at that guy” and feel out her response. Glance/chuckle usually good, if shes obviously head down and not reacting then oh well count that as a miss.

But say she mildly interacts, you could continue with a compliment about either something she has on like a band/graphic tee maybe you relate to in some way and comment on, or maybe she has a macbook or hydroflask with stickers and you can mention one of them. Just find something to connect on. school bag? ask her what shes majoring in. work uniform? ask her how her shift was (rather than asking are you just getting off or where do you work) or if shes headed to work you can say you hope she has a good day.

And you can always just give someone your number. Im a girl and multiple times I have written down my number and given it to someone and just said “This is my number, you should text me”. Sometimes they dont, sometimes they do.

If you appear genuine and dont push conversation with people who obviously dont want to be talked to, it will work for you eventually

Special-Fan5835 · 2022-07-03T13:26:39+00:00

Look man it is very simple just be yourself. What you do is you just stop her with "Excuse me" like you suggested and you can call her "cute" or whatever and that's the right thing, because you are being honest with her right from the beginning, revealing to her the reason you approached. If you want you can also add a bit of social calibration in terms of acknowledging how random or crazy this situation actually is (since it doesn't happen that often to both of you...so you already have something in common in a way).

Then what to talk about? Just get to know her - name, where she is from, what is she doing (working/studying) , what is she up to right now, what she likes to do in her free time...whatever. But make sure it is a conversation and not an interview. Then finish of with suggesting to hang out (maybe something she mentioned she liked) and take her number.

Stay confident, calm and have a nice smile on your face.

This is what has worked for me. Of course not every girl will be interested but you gotta keep trying. Life is too short to be scared.

Total_Obligation_371 · 2022-07-03T16:35:39+00:00

I'm assuming you saw my post about cold approaching. Just follow up with what are you up to today and then have three to five questions/comments ready to keep the convo going. Once you are done with those canned questions/ comments, just ask what she's up to that week and that you guys should grab a drink or coffee sometime. If a girl is not in a relationship, is open to meeting new guys, and likes your general vibe and look, she will be open to meeting up with you and you don't need to make it too complicated trying to convince her of it.

dave61359 · 2022-07-03T19:25:06+00:00

Just state at them and lick your lips

ZealousidealFile1 · 2022-07-04T06:50:11+00:00

Since it's your beginning I would suggest practice being comfortable with the situation. So what you should do is : 1) Open - compliment 2) (After positive reply) Speak about yourself e.g "I'm actually from (place), but I've been living in this place for a x months. I actually found (describe what you observed about her that caught your eye) 3) then pause and let her initiate the conversation if she does or otherwise ask Where are you from? 4) Talk a bit about that 5) Then tell her "I would love to talk to you more but have to go do (some activity), how about we exchange nos(Instagram) and carry on this conversation later" 6) Close.

GalickBanger · 2022-07-03T12:18:42+00:00

When I’m day gaming, I just make it seem like I’m minding my business, doing whatever I’m doing, but she was so attractive I had to say hi. “I’m honestly just here looking for pineapples, but you’re so fine I had to say something.” If they’re attracted they usually smile or laugh, then I’ll introduce myself, talk for a minute or two, then ask for their number. If they’re attracted to you there’s not much to it.

PS: I try to cross paths and make eye contact with them, just so they’re not as surprised and already get a look at me.

No_Bite_7238 · 2022-07-03T08:26:09+00:00

Don't ever use the word "Cute" in ANY of your opening lines!! In fact, the word "Cute" is no longer part of your Vocabulary!!

Telling someone they are "cute" implies one of two things.

1) That person isnt good enough to be Hot or Sexy, or Naughty or, any of the things they want to complemented on and thus automatically turned off and your in the friend zone.

2) Implies that you don't have the confidence to say what your really thinking or have the brains to be somewhat original. Which, once again, puts you into the friend zone automatically.

What have we learned?

Take a chance is Good. Friend Zone is bad.

No_Bite_7238 · 2022-07-03T09:48:17+00:00

Lol, "Cute" is what you say so as not to hurt someone's feelings because you don't find them attractive when their friend asks you what you think. Cute is an easy let down.

redditor4206903 · 2022-07-03T11:22:25+00:00

You are a fvcking wierdo, by saying they are cute. Bruv. Imagine that some fvcking random dude, walks up to you and says you are cute, can I get your number. Bro, just like stop it. Get some help. Be normal, comunicate normaly. A girl can look cute from a distance and be ugly face to face. Also guys who have options dont tell girls they are cute. Did you ever see James Bond, walk up to a chick and say some gay shit like "Hiiii cutie". Learn to comunicate normaly, like a human being. Ask her if she is local? Ask her about the area, about what she likes to do around. Then tell her that you want her ig/number so that you can stay in contact. No need for compliments. 5/10 she will text you first on ig. Also she will be more responsive, if she knows you are not interest right away and she will try harder to impress you.

PTSDrazor · 2022-07-03T14:58:10+00:00

Generally, you did everything right, just missing some steps. After you opened to her you can immediately go for a number close or even try to take her out right there. The most important thing is that you close or at least go for a close or else you basically wasted you time.

Also don't over think. I ran my best cold approaches when I'm not thinking to hard about my actions.

Good luck getting bitches where ever you go. Keep cold approaching!!!

WeirdLaw · 2022-07-03T16:45:27+00:00

Start talking with them the same way you start talking with a guy, if you get a positive response, escalate it. You don't know where is the line until you pass it.

GordonGecko69 · 2022-07-03T18:09:53+00:00

No! Telling a girl she is cute is a complete waste of time. She has been hit on at least 500 times THAT DAY before you got to her. Join the pile of clowns or be interesting. Which would you pick?

Cave_dweller123 · 2022-07-03T11:21:04+00:00

Don’t compliment first thing. Start up a convo, if it’s going well ask “can I compliment you?”

That line does has worked for me.

2022-07-03T23:48:04+00:00

When you can tell they’re having a good time talking to you ask for her number. It’s very easy

Timba2022 · 2022-07-03T11:22:41+00:00

Make statements after opener. Do not start asking questions

makethisperv · 2022-07-03T17:11:30+00:00

I won't give you a super detailed advice but I'll give you an opener that i like a lot, wich is: Hey excuse me! ... I was wondering if... You've seen how handsome i am

And after the opener just trying to maintain the interaction.

For me i like that opener because it's self amusing (it puts me in a good humor) it's a good starting frame (because i mean... If they agree then i can start to escalating the interaction) and it forces me to behave like an attractive guy during the interaction.

mfposgbcs · 2022-07-03T17:36:37+00:00

Just start a regular conversation like you would with any stranger. Keep it short because you don't want to waste too much time if she's not interested.

TechnoGeek423 · 2022-07-03T19:02:06+00:00

Cold approach is the key that opens the door to all the good stuff that 99.9% of daters will never see. And it doesn’t have to be as hard or as creepy as many in the community will suggest.

Be yourself. But be your best self. And be at least a little bit bold. Just 2% will get you there. Don’t script lines.

Various_Bass_7553 · 2022-07-03T21:55:33+00:00

Who here has tried going down and dirty from the start like Alan Roger Currie suggests to do? I never could do it because 1) I don’t have the balls to do it, 2) I don’t want to get kicked out of local businesses and 3) I’ve seen social experiments where no women are receptive to that.

Chicagoj1563 · 2022-07-03T23:14:38+00:00

I’m not a fan of this style, but if you’re going to use it try Tom toreros model. After the open, cold read to find a topic:

Excuse me, I know this sounds random…

Then something like, “what I noticed about you is you have a dreamy artist vibe about you. Are you a musician?” Or whatever you want to cold read on. Think of her job, location, or what she’s doing right now.

Your just looking for a topic. Once you get one, then twist it and have fun. Tease, challenge, etc.,.

Look up Tom toreros beginners guide to day game if it’s still online.

Senior-Dot387 · 2022-07-04T02:14:24+00:00

Start with the environment you’re in, have some good small talk, maybe a bit of flirting (once you get good enough). Avoid the boring questions like what do you do, keep the conversation in the moment.

Allcoughsmatter · 2022-07-04T02:24:32+00:00

What I’d say is go environmental and just have fun with it, be playful and shoot for laughs and maybe even think of it as just talking to anyone (not necessarily a hot chick). Lighten the atmosphere and then gradually escalate/show interest.

Title	Cold approach help
Author	Ok_Artichoke3645
Upvotes	28
Comments	116
Date	July 3, 2022 7:24 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/vqc1jh/cold_approach_help/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/cold-approach-help.1255465 https://theredarchive.com/post/1255465

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