Don't get plastic surgery just to attract men

shedipity · 2021-08-28T11:54:19+00:00

you WILL attract men by getting plastic surgery!! just... the wrong type of men.

Risas1239 · 2021-08-28T12:29:09+00:00

Whenever I start feeling insecure about a woman with surgery, I always check out her partner and their relationship. Nine times out of ten they are treated like garbage. In fact, the number of surgeries tends to match the depravity of the man’s behavior (see Kardashians). Many HVM dislike plastic surgery, or value other things more. As someone from a place where most women get surgery, I learned that it’s rarely worth it.

avocadobarbie · 2021-08-28T15:16:56+00:00

I’ve had a boob job, 2 BBLS, and lip fillers. I was hoping that having an Instagram body would make me more desirable and make men want to lock me down more but it had the opposite effect. Now I’m a fun toy. Awesome to look at and fuck but too afraid to lock down because they’re insecure and don’t like high maintenance women. I swear it makes their Madonna whore complex come out so much more. My ex loved my ass and boobs but would yell at me about other men looking at me. They want the super hot plastic girl but are way too insecure to keep her. Then to add to it they still won’t even take care of themselves to match the girl with the $20,000 body. They’re entitled to her beautiful body without even taking care of theirs. So plastic surgery just makes you casts wider net, and because of that you pull back 90% more trash and porn sick losers.

CanadianRadFeminist · 2021-08-28T14:43:13+00:00

It's also not talked about enough that beauty trends come and go. 10 years from now, having a BBL or lip injections will probably be "out of style". The fact that women's bodies go through trend cycles is disgusting and offensive on its face.

Frogspocket · 2021-08-28T13:03:43+00:00

We exist in a patriarchy and conforming to beauty standards (including getting plastic surgery) makes your experience in it easier. Fitting the beauty standard gives you advantage of perceived competency and good character (even if you have neither of those things). Which leads to massive perks (like higher salary, favors, etc).

The thing is, what happens when you conform to the standard is YOU WILL ATTRACT FELLOW PATRIARCHY PLEASERS. And you WILL get swept up in that lifestyle because you'll be surrounded by people who prioritize it. The ultimate end game of the patriarchy is a generic, capitalist, unfulfilled lifestyle that has made women miserable for generations.

This gets tricky because some women sincerely DO enjoy that lifestyle and they are not lying when they say it makes them happy. They want the generic Instagram face, the engagement photos, the gender reveal parties, the cookie cutter house in the suburbs and the husband that golfs on the weekends, and whatever. That, to them, is the ultimate success. It feels safe and fulfilling and makes them happy. So IF THAT'S THE LIFE YOU ACTUALLY WANT then lean in. There is nothing wrong with that if it's your truth. So if what is holding you back from getting that life is your looks then by all means change your looks. Plastic surgery, for some women, is a godsend. It sets them on the path to finding the type of man they want and the type of life they want.

But I highly doubt that's what most women REALLY want. Most of us THINK we want that, (especially when we're young) because we are absolutely brainwashed. Most of us start down that path and spend our energy constantly adapting. When heroin chic is in we starve, when big butts are in we hit the gym. When tiny, almost nonexistent noses are in we cut our faces up. We accept shitty behavior from men because we want their validation. On and on it goes. By the time we finally grow into ourselves and snap out of it it feels too late. We're already deep into an unfilled relationship or career.

Meanwhile, what you probably actually want from life is something closer to liberation. Which starts with embracing your uniqueness and authenticity, and attracts people who you belong amongst. Every woman has her own special beauty. Most of us throw it away to conform or waste it by being insecure. It's silly. What we should all be doing is playing up our uniqueness, being confident in ourselves, living our truth.

It feels good to be validated for our appearance, I get that. But what we don't see is that we don't have to get that validation of men and patriarchy pleasers (who honestly have bad taste). You can seek validation from other women, from men who appreciate your uniqueness (they exist) and from other liberated and unique people. The current traditional beauty standard is not the only form of beauty. It's just what is mainstream.

Think of all the generic, tasteless bands, movies and restaurants that are popular and compare them to your personal favorites. Your personal favorites are probably much more special, unique and memorable, right? That's what beauty is like. Just because one look is popular doesn't mean it's more special or that it's better. It's just popular among the masses. And like I mentioned (imo) the masses have bad taste. Especially men.

I'm a hypocrite and a work in progress myself. Ive never had plastic surgery but I am aware I fit the beauty standards so I've always leaned in. I'm working hard on unfucking my brain and pursuing a lifestyle that I actually want (of peace, discovery, art, humor and fun) which requires getting over my tendency to fall back into chasing validation of the male gaze. But it's very difficult because of the pressure to conform conform conform and because of the perks (the halo effect). Beauty is a complicated thing. I'm not even sure what my point is but it's therapeutic to vent 🙃

Peengwin · 2021-08-28T14:37:47+00:00

Its so sad seeing the billions upon billions that women spend on expensive, painful, and damaging procedures, treatments, and products in order to conform to what the media tells us that will make us attractive to men. And for the women who think "no, having my lips look like a baboons ass makes me feel powerful!," we really must be honest with ourselves about the source of where the idea to look like that, and why, really came from. Why are men not spending billions on these procedures? If men aren't doing it, why should we?

electroloop · 2021-08-28T14:58:17+00:00

As someone with numerous procedures, I can confirm.

Not only does it attract LV men who care only about my appearance and don’t have the gall to get to know me as an individual, it severely affects my day to day life. I get sneered at by random women on the street and laughed at about my comically sized boobs. People assume that I work in “entertainment” because of my look, although I’m highly educated with a comfy job in my field.

Plastic surgery will also hinder your ability to be taken seriously not just by men, but by employers. We still live in a society where we base judgements on first appearances.

Potential-Bid-245 · 2021-08-28T12:56:46+00:00

And on the other side of the same coin, don’t let a man prevent you from having surgery that will make you happy and feel better about yourself. There’s a form of toxic positivity that makes us women feel like we have to accept everything about ourselves (which men enforce), when sometimes a simple surgery will change our whole outlook on life.

creamtart_ · 2021-08-28T14:22:17+00:00

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