Q4Women: Who was the most masculine guy you dated?

camelliafleur · 2017-04-24T22:37:45+00:00

So, who was the most masculine guy you ever dated?

He works as a mechanic, he played in a band on the weekends sometimes. 5 foot 9, had a drinking problem. huge arms, big beer belly and this super sexy beard

What made him masculine?

He's just built like a truck, has a horrible temper, doesn't let anyone tell him what to do ever, he has a very "I'll do it myself" kinda attitude when it came to problems. He's really sweet sometimes.

Did you like his masculine traits?

I ended up marrying him =P He's my rock =)

And you disliked?

Kinda hard living with a man like that sometimes =\

Was he still dominant and masculine in bed, and if so, did you enjoy it?

Oooh yah =)

How about in reverse. Who is the most effeminate guy?

I dated some boy in highschool who turned out to be gay, he was really hot though

IamTheWalkingMenu · 2017-04-24T23:00:49+00:00

Def my ex fiancé. He radiated, I mean oozed energy and masculinity. He is a risk taker in a high stakes career. Confident in the extreme and very persuasive and always primed for something be it sex or action or even violence I think. Talk about being swept away by someone's energy. Lots of interests and friends. Mostly a super great guy. It was amazing. Until it wasn't.

philomexa · 2017-04-24T23:02:17+00:00

I suppose on paper, the Mexican gang banger turned solider I dated between high school and college was fairly masculine. But he had too much family drama that I had no interest in getting roped into. Additionally the sex was so-so.

I was blatantly drawn to his bad boy persona, and enjoyed the perks of his lifestyle (mainly drugs and partying). But I wasn't interested in becoming a Catholic broodmare, military wife, or deal with his save-a-ho complex.

Luckily my husband showed up and fit my bad boy requirements minus the bail bond hearings, hispanic culture, and drive by shootings. Plus he fucks like a stallion and has a great weed hookup.

So I suppose my husband is the most masculine guy I've dated on paper and in real life.

I never have nor would I ever date a feminine man. can that nigga even fuck?

2017-04-24T23:08:21+00:00

Probably my fiance. He has a masculine job (welder), likes working with his hands and is very capable with that sort of thing. He's a huge flirt and women tend to like him; he's not the most conventionally attractive guy, but he's incredibly charming. He has his feminine side too though -- loves kids and is great with them, loves to cook, very neat/clean, artistic, good/funky dresser.

I think the fact that he's capable with his hands is one of the sexiest things about him to me. There's just something about a guy who can build shit. He's also very natural and relaxed around women, probably due to the fact that he has four sisters. He's a very clear, direct communicator which I appreciate immensely, and he's helped me become a better communicator too. I can't really think of any aspects of his personality that I don't like that I would attribute to his masculinity. Maybe that he drives too fast? Lol

My most recent ex was pretty masculine too, I'd say. He was very outdoorsy and into survivalist stuff and hunting and fishing. He had a big beard and dressed like a typical guy -- jeans and t-shirts every day. But he was also a kindergarten teacher and an outspoken feminist.

My first boyfriend was definitely the most effeminate guy I've dated in looks and demeanor. He had very feminine features and mannerisms, was very emotional/hysterical, wrote poetry, cried all the time. This is also the guy I've had multiple terps tell me I was "alpha widowed" by. Not sure how that works.

abicus4343 · 2017-04-24T23:31:50+00:00

This is just one example of a masculine guy I met in a bar one night. Instead of the usual betas that stand around and stare at girls hoping the girls will talk to them, this guy just saw what he wanted and went for it, no hesitation, no over thinking or building up enough courage or trying to make awkward small talk to feel out if the woman was interested first.

This guy just saw me, liked what he saw, introduced himself, bought me a drink, told the other guys around us to basically get lost and then pulled me into a private corner to talk. At the end of the night he said I was coming home with him to dance on his deck to his favorite song on repeat over and over. He didn't care if i was into it or not, he just assumed i would be and that's what he wanted to do so as far as he was concerned thats what we were doing, end of issue. Pure confidence and no awkward insecurity or supplicating to me.

We went to his place, danced to his song for awhile then he just started making out with me, no questions, no hesitation but he also knew when I was uncomfortable with anything and he would make it right. He just took control of the whole situation without being creepy or pushy. I felt comfortable with his lead and I was very attracted to his attitude. He wasn't super hot or anything so it wasn't his looks, it was all about his masculine attitude and confidence. It's so rare these days that when I do run into it in a man I just melt.

shogunofsarcasm · 2017-04-24T22:38:39+00:00

I don't know if any of them stood above the rest in terms of masculinity. They all had masculine features/mannerisms, but each was different from one another

speltspelt · 2017-04-25T00:11:46+00:00

My ex had hm...extremely male traits, being a probably-autistic computer scientist. They were mostly negative traits though, like only being assertive when he was being self-destructive, hatred of food, making his elderly mother buy his clothes. Not much in the way of female traits, maybe conflict avoidance. My partner has a ton of positive masculine and feminine traits, which is amazing and much appreciated.

Tacticalogistics · 2017-04-25T01:02:34+00:00

You guys taking notes?

2017-04-25T00:32:54+00:00

So, who was the most masculine guy you ever dated?

My husband

What made him masculine?

He's a giant dude. He grew up on a farm and still has a lot of that culture in him. But he is also a working artist and which requires he hangs from things, does dangerous things and is in charge of crews of men hanging from things and doing dangerous stuff. He's a leader and sticks to his convictions no matter what. He tends to yell when he disagrees with someone and it scares people who don't know him well. He always has drugs and won't tell people (not even me sometimes) where he gets them because he says, "nothing good comes from you knowing. I have it handled."

Did you like his masculine traits?

Mostly yes. I like his stature and I like his beard and how safe I feel with him.

And you disliked?

He's stubborn and not all that verbal. It's difficult to navigate things when he digs his heels in. He just doesn't do things he doesn't want to do. He'd say, "I can't," and if I countered, "No, you won't" for years I think he didn't fathom the difference. Now I think he gets it at least. Still stubborn though... I get jealous of the way the dogs favor him.

Was he still dominant and masculine in bed, and if so, did you enjoy it?

He is often, usually it comes in waves depending on his/my mood. I enjoy all the different ways we have sex.

Where there little things your alpha stud did that you think the typical red should know about?

Should know? Nah. But I think it's funny that he's a feminist, calls this place "fighting with sexists" and is likely manlier than most RPers.

How about in reverse. Who is the most effeminate guy? What were his best and worst effeminate traits? How was he in bed?

My HS boyfriend, Chad. (No, I am not kidding.) He...had a lot of feelings? Which was good and bad. He was very effusive and romantic while we were together. Then we broke up after going off to college (I wanted to stay together, he wanted to break up) and he told everyone I was addicted to ecstasy because I kissed a boy at a frat party. So the lots of feelings had a down side. We didn't have sex but the fool arounds were fun. We were young and experimenting... no dominance on either side.

EliteSpartanRanger · 2017-04-25T03:22:17+00:00

Why is this marked NSFW? Almost every topic here is NSFW

mistresswhat · 2017-04-25T03:54:38+00:00

I find very masculine men boring and conventional and generally avoid them so this is a tough one and my "most masculine" is probably more effeminate than some people's most effeminate.

Probably the dude I casually dated something like six years ago. He was tall and bearded and barrel-chested. He tried to dom me in bed and I wasn't into it. Didn't go down on me nearly enough. Is sexually selfish a masculine trait? Because I am not a fan. Overall the sex wasn't that great. He did have a really cute cat, but his cat hated me. I don't think I've ever been so disliked by an animal in my life. I remember the cat more than I remember the dude, honestly. His name was Zoot and he was very fat.

Most effeminate is also hard because effeminate is my entire type. My current boyfriend borrows my crop tops and still isn't the most ladylike dude in my history. My ex is maybe the most effeminate guy I've dated. He loved thrift stores and interior design and sewing and cute animals and was really great at dying my hair. He was very depressed and cried on me a lot, which sucked -- not because it was unmanly, but because he was in pain and refused to get help and it hurt to see him like that. He was really awesome at sex and I stuck it out with him longer than I should have based on that alone.

scallopkid · 2017-04-25T04:44:22+00:00

It seems like a lot of women here are answering with their current SO. I feel the same way but I have to wonder how objective I can be, based on that pattern.

deco_doll · 2017-04-26T08:40:00+00:00

Most masculine: my ex B. Funny tho, he was definitely also very feminine in some aspects ( wrote poetry, very emotionally open and artistic). What made him masculine: his hands, long dreads and tattoos, Kung fu practice, didn't put up with my bs when I started acting up, he took initiative, I felt safe with him emotionally and physically, and planned dates/surprised me often. Also he was good at buliding things.

Sex: awesome best ever. He was spontaneous and could be rough but was also very tender and sweet, it was like he knew how to read me(what mood I was in that night) and that was super hot. He also was very direct and open about sex and had a laid back attitude if something didn't go right. It was easy and natural, we laughed a lot. I could have given him bjs every day for the rest of my life and been 100% happy about it.

Most feminine: my ex J. Tall, slender runners body, professor no real skills in terms of fixing things, he wasn't a very comfortable driver, he sat with his legs crossed, He had no real ambition to advance his career even though he had a PhD ( had been a adjunct for over 10 years). Way too emotional and yelled over stupid stuff. Always on Facebook. 45 and still worried about his band. Did not discipline his daughter or enforce rules. Annoying.

Funnily, he was also into being a dom and had experience with the poly scene and bondage clubs, etc. I just couldn't go there with him, I just didn't feel submissive to him in any way. I felt like his mother half the time. He had a big penis but unfortunately, not a whole lot of rhythm. I think he watched too more porn and really didn't understand how real life sex works between two people,

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funny_lyfe · 2017-04-25T00:49:27+00:00

Well I had an online friend who I had a crush on like 5 years ago and he still uses the same username everywhere and I found him on the red pill so I guess him.

2017-04-25T00:49:52+00:00

No one.

BellaScarletta · 2017-04-25T04:55:30+00:00

Most definitely my current SO, though my most recent ex was a close second...he was more the natural MGTOW brand of masculinity though, he just didn't like to take women's shit so it was keep up or fall behind. My current SO is amazing. I wouldn't call him more beta than my ex, but definitely less idgaf which makes for better relationship material.

He's a personal trainer and I love that he's so passionate about heavy lifting. I think most women love the sense of pride when another girl wants their dude, but I love the added bonus watching dudes lose their shit over him. He honestly gets really annoyed, but I definitely feel smug at parties when all the other girls' boyfriends are crowded around him trying to figure out how to be just like him. It's to the point where I have certain friends who he refuses to see when their boyfriends are around because he can't stand the fawning. I love it though but I don't blame him, lol.

He's definitely tricky to be with sometimes, but only because he doesn't ever fall for my shit tests which I'll admit leads to hurt feelings. It's not intentional on my part nor on his, but I'll just say he lets me know exactly when I'm annoying him and sometimes that stings. I usually take a step back though and it's easy to see why he wouldn't give a crap about whatever it is I was going on about...I think that's just one side of the coin when you pair masculinity with femininity...obviously interests differ quite a lot.

I think if I had to answer things he does that the typical red should know about.....it's true self-respect. He respects himself, so he doesn't take my shit, but he will take almost any opportunity he can to make me happy - he doesn't need to belittle me just to prove something to stay alpha. He does a lot for me but my respect for him never falters because his respect for himself never falters.
Maybe he'll have a week where he really does more than usual around the house..I guarantee before I had a chance to let that go to my head, he'd lay down the law. It would be impossible for me to walk all over him..I love knowing that.

He's by far the best in bed but I wouldn't consider it respectful to him to say any more beyond that.

Most effeminate...that's a hard one. Before I was RP I was kind of a classic alpha bitch that really belittled men. My mom once said "my problem is I date men I can control, and then I can't respect them" - I definitely followed in her footsteps before I realized what was happening, and it took a lot of self work to rectify those behaviours.

My point is, I don't know if I've dated anybody I would describe as effeminate...but they were all pushovers that I could walk all over. I mean, I suppose in theory it was nice getting mostly everything I wanted from them. But in reality it just lead to unfulfilled relationships, lack of respect, and quick downward spirals.

There's really no comparison between them vs my current SO. He's my proof of how far I've come, because I know it takes so much to be deserving of him and I want to be worth it for him.

DeathByBeelzie · 2017-04-25T05:51:28+00:00

Never dated a masculine guy at all,at least not by my standarts. I have dated super jacked guys with great careers,but somehow I always lead in the relationship. All of my boyfriends have been 5"7-5"8,which I just love and have followed my lead,so I suppose they were all emasculine.

sunkindonut149 · 2017-04-25T14:11:34+00:00

In NYC we call it acting "hard" or "gangsta" and I am not attracted to this because its a form of toxic masculinity. I think most women are repelled by "thuggin" behavior which is a sign of un- or under employment. The local rap scene is crawling with these jokers aka rapcel NEETs waiting for their album to drop.

Once I hungout with a guy who tried to act "hard". In order to be masc he ate artery killing foods like Checkers, not "gay" foods. He also wore leather everywhere because he "identifies" as a metalhead (a metalcel to me).

There was also a guy who ate nothing but bacon and wore a hat that said "ghetto". Nota bene: I did not date these guys I was trying to get them involved in music projects but they were non-cooperative.

slavicgypsygirl · 2017-05-01T01:23:13+00:00

a1. The most stereotypically "masculine" man I dated will stay anon.

a2. He liked hunting/game fishing/dirt bikes/4wd'ing/jet & water skiing/whiskey bars/cigars/casinos & owned boats.

a3. I liked that he was totally passionate about everything he did.

a4. I disliked his jealousy.

a5. He was sexually dominant & always amazing which I loved.

a6. "The typical red" should cultivate his own interests.

a7. I am not attracted to effeminate guys.

Title	Q4Women: Who was the most masculine guy you dated?
Author	TheChemist158
Upvotes	16
Comments	99
Date	April 24, 2017 10:27 PM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/67cgwd/q4women_who_was_the_most_masculine_guy_you_dated/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/q4women-who-was-the-most-masculine-guy-you-dated.1071917 https://theredarchive.com/post/1071917

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