Ladies of /exredpill what makes you want to help men leave the Red Pill?

honey-bundy-88 · 2021-12-02T18:33:20+00:00

I discovered TRP by accident and have since turned my study of the manosphere into a personal hobby. The way that these factions developed around gender roles and race and shifting attitudes towards sex culture is all very alluring to me. Having been on the side of the hopeless, depressed, and “forever alone” crowd, I understand where a lot of their mindset comes from. Deep seeded feelings of inferiority, fears of being left behind, feeling like your life won’t really start until you meet that special person. It’s all a bullshit mind game that was keeping me miserable. Your life can be so much more meaningful and fulfilling than what you hear online, and I want other people to know that.

Edit: I’ve also seen what happens when these attitudes go unchecked. I’ve had men demean me, tell me I’m shit, tell me I’ll never be deserving of a good man, that I’m bred to fail or that I’m “only good for twerking” because of my race (attitudes shared by many men even outside TRP). A month ago, a popular youtuber’s life was threatened and what he told her made me fear for my life for the first time. He said he hated black women and that he wanted to go on a raping/murdering spree and described in great detail how he’d do it. As a black woman I can’t afford to be ignorant of the way people see me. I am already deemed disposable by society, so I have no choice but to pay attention when these attitudes can have a direct impact on my safety.

jejuned · 2021-12-02T18:54:01+00:00

i want there to be fewer misogynists in the world. i want it to be safer for women than it currently is. i would also really like for disenfranchised (men of color, poor men, disabled men, abuse and trauma victims) redpiller or incel types to understand that women are also a disenfranchised group and that working together for societal change benefits almost everyone and would genuinely solve a lot of what they consider to be dating inequity across genders.

foxs_shrike · 2021-12-02T20:35:14+00:00

Part of it is helping myself fight off the internalized misogyny by weakening the destructive voice in my head that fears some TRP things are true and de-esssentializing both men and women to see all of us as human beings while still acknowledging some very real and often dangerous gender dynamics.

This is an important fight. I encounter horrible evidence supporting TRP, not just in niche online communities, but in everyday life. It's very easy to get bitter after a string of first dates have turned out to be married, try to play with the waistband of my pants while on a walk, or lied to me about their age because they thought their real age was too old. It's reassuring to see guys detoxing from the unbelievable entitlement to women's bodies and hatred of women. Toxic gender relations are not our fate. No it's not women's responsibility to make men empathetic, so I offer as much support as is healthy for me.

princessbubbbles · 2021-12-02T21:38:52+00:00

I grew up surrounded by brothers and am more socially comfortable around men. I found a husband who is cool with me being a tomboy, and the "Saturday is for the boys" includes me because, well, his boys are also my boys. Women have to deal with a whole lot of b.s., but men do too, albeit in different ways. Seeing my Boys hurt so much and have no one to talk to is heartbreaking. Some of them cry when they are finally hugged because they've been starved of any form of affection their whole lives just for being male. Some of them want to cry but physically can't because their brains have been ao harshly trained not to. No wonder why many of them cling to the Red Pill! People can choose what they believe and are answerable for what they choose to believe. But behind each cynical, misogynistic redpiller is a man who is hurting. A man who is dispairing. I am trying to help the redpillers I meet irl, which bleeds into my online life. Even if I don't "convert" them, I still want them to know that there is hope, and Red Pill's rules about how humanity works aren't binding. Little ideas planted now can help guide them later when they are more receptive to change.

Egoist-chan · 2021-12-03T00:17:35+00:00

Mostly because I think true value and happiness derives from authentically experiencing life without being attached to outcomes, not by classifying everything through a lens of sex dynamics and misplaced nostalgia for "a traditional age".

When we endorse TRP we actually diminish what life has to offer us in favor of a wholly speculative and unrealistic "it could be like this". "Like this" basically amounts to a Taliban-like control over women and society whilst contributing nothing of true meaning or value to the history of the world.

UggggghhhhPfff · 2021-12-02T20:31:23+00:00

The internet told me redpillers and incels were hateful, entitled misogynistic.

I went on redpill a d incel forums and found a bunch of lonely young men who had been told by the world they weren't good enough for love, that if they just changed everything about themselves they might be worthy, who reacted with the entire spectrum of human emotion-- defeat, anger, sadness, insecurity.

It makes me sad. I also know what it feels like to be told by the world that you're not good enough. For those people who are actively trying, who understand redpill but want to believe there's more to the world than that... I wanna help if I can.

seeingredagain · 2021-12-03T04:09:22+00:00

It is a harmful, debilitating cult that takes advantage of people who are lonely and desperate. No better than any religious cult that threatens you with the fear of god.

Hotsaucekarina · 2021-12-03T04:23:17+00:00

👁👄👁 (female here). I am surprised by this question cause I wasn’t expecting other women to lurk this thread.

I used to have a much more popular account (waaaay more karma) on here where I’d try helping incels realise how unhelpful their mindset towards women/relationships is in their plight (and I like to think some of the ppl there listened- I figured even if only 1/10 listened I was helping).

I guess for me I’m mainly here cause I want to support people having more equity/equality and I kinda want to be a cheerleader to ppl who have left the red pill mindset. I think it’s admirable to grow past a certain limiting mindset and I want to encourage ppl on their plight. Plus it’s kind of refreshing to read how ppl have changed (for the better).

myromunya · 2021-12-02T22:54:41+00:00

https://www.reddit.com/r/india/comments/r6vefy/shahbaz_ansar_asks_delhi_men_why_do_rapes_happen/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share

Environmental-Row979 · 2021-12-02T22:59:39+00:00

Because I believe that men are better than TRP believes they are. I believe that it is important for their growth that they learn how to listen to women.

I also believe that it is NOT a woman's job to provide emotional labor or guidance for men (we have enough work to do when it comes to unlearning our own internalized misogyny), but that this is a space where women have agreed to provide it on their own time and terms.

medlabunicorn · 2021-12-03T06:24:35+00:00

They are in pain, and they are striking out at others and causing more pain.

CitrusyDeodorant · 2021-12-03T07:26:19+00:00

Because it's a fundamentally harmful ideology that causes nothing but suffering and no one should be a part of that.

maliapani · 2021-12-03T07:22:51+00:00

I dated a red-pilled man once.

cabsmom2020 · 2021-12-03T01:03:59+00:00

I dated a man last year (I was 51, he was 41). He was red pill (and mgtow), but saw me as the "unicorn." However, the fact that he knew I was good didn't prevent his RP ideology from ruining our relationship.

I would like men to realize that RP is very toxic many times and it can ruin someone's life or at least their love life.

agavaa · 2021-12-03T22:00:16+00:00

Because the red pill is bad for everyone. Being on that path is miserable, the faster you get off of it the sooner you can find your happy path. Life is hard and confusing. We should help each other.

heytheredelilah91 · 2021-12-03T00:29:59+00:00

Because misogyny hurts everyone.

AutoModerator · 2021-12-02T18:43:53+00:00

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lynn181 · 2021-12-04T06:50:57+00:00

A good friend of mine, who was also an ex boyfriend, got sucked into redpill shortly after his mom died and he lost his job. It was really bizarre and terrifying to watch him change into someone barely recognizable. He used to be a fairly normal guy, had tons of friends of both genders, and we had a great relationship. (We broke up because he decided he wanted kids and I did not, it was an amicable decision that was for the best). One of the main reasons I dated him was because he treated everyone with genuine respect and was super chill and calming.

He now lives in a dingy horse trailer in someone's backyard, worships Trump and grifters like Ben Shapiro and Stefan Molyneux and other red pill dating coaches but hasn't had a girlfriend in five years. He went full Q too and now just rants about government conspiracies amongst his whole 'alpha male' gimmick despite having no job, no house, and no money. I still associate with him because I feed him and buy him food and gas once in a while. He alienated his family, lost all his friends, and just watches youtube and hangs out in these radical online spaces. Truth be told, I can hardly stand him because he can't have a conversation without saying awful things...but I don't want him to starve either.

I still don't know what the fuck happened. He was so normal. He grew up with happily married parents...where the mom was the breadwinner. His brothers are all still normal and in happy relationships. They can barely stand talking to him anymore either.

I began looking into some of the crazy stuff he was saying so that I could try and figure it out, and discovered what redpill meant. Now I'm here because I was looking for success stories about how to save people from this cult.

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LadyKitana · 2021-12-07T23:34:26+00:00

I stumbled upon this group by accident, I saw like so many the violence that is carried out by men in society that have a hatred for women. I also suspected after discovering the group that someone I used to know may have been exposed to this group, some of the talking points are alike. I first listened with interest on the problems men face In society, that I could learn something to better my relationships with them. However it was far from the case, made me realize there are so many lonely broken men out there, that are looking to belong and connect with people.

Unfortunately that group is definitely not the space to do so, I want to show that women are flawed just like men and there are good people out there. I could have easily went though an anger stage and hate all men, but I was fortunate enough to have good positive men in my life to show me otherwise. I want to help men with the same!

I respect everyone on here who is trying to make a change in a space where you all can support each other. I want to thank you all, I was hesitate to post in the group but you all have welcome my opinion and I hope I can help someone.

Brosky1998 · 2021-12-03T02:22:25+00:00

I mean according to the red pill, one of the most powerful things in the dating market is a man that is RP aware/aware of female nature. So of course women don’t want men to be red pilled. That way they can optimize hypergamy and settle for a beta provider during the ephiphany phase/once they’re old and aged out of the cock carousel. I’m not saying I agree or disagree with that statement, I’m just saying the red pill has an obvious answer to this question

Title	Ladies of /exredpill what makes you want to help men leave the Red Pill?
Author	__changetheworld__
Upvotes	25
Comments	69
Date	December 2, 2021 5:53 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/ExRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/exredpill/comments/r7d1qy/ladies_of_exredpill_what_makes_you_want_to_help/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/ExRedPill/ladies-of-exredpill-what-makes-you-want-to-help.1089086 https://theredarchive.com/post/1089086

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