Why catcalling happens?

DeepFriedWine · 2021-12-27T04:05:15+00:00

All men shouldn't be discriminated against because some men catcall. Period. It doesn't matter why they do it or if we can construct a framework of ideas around it. Men generally frown on that sort of shitty behaviour, even in Edwardian times. The problem is that feminists and the current society want to take a hypothetical of that behaviour as a universal truth and pre-judge all men accordingly.

Forgetaboutthelonely · 2021-12-27T08:35:15+00:00

https://imgur.com/z6oLeKc

I have a somewhat different theory that's explained well through this image. But to put it briefly.

It's the golden rule "treat others how you would like to be treated"

It's just gone sour because there is a difference in how men and women see that attention. For many men. Getting catcalled or even complimented is a rare occasion. Hell, I still remember getting complimented on my eyes seven or eight years ago by a guy making my sandwich at a subway.

This considered. it's not hard to see why some guys act towards women in a way they feel they'd enjoy if they were the recipient

Cfox006 · 2021-12-27T01:47:35+00:00

For me I found it basically being the consequences of men being told that they have to initiate and women don’t.

The reality is this means guys can initiate in any way because people under estimate the mental strain that is rejection so men compensate by initiating in ways that will net them less mental hurt, it’s human nature to reduce pain by finding shortcuts.

This is where cat calling comes into play because it’s an over exaggerated way to hit on a girl and if you get rejected you can just walk away or just leave the mental burden to “oh well I’m just a guy and I’m supposed to hit on them so it’s whatever” and move onto the next girl on the street.

Regardless it’s a much easier thing to deal with than personally asking a girl out that you’ve known because personally hearing it from them is a lot more painful because they know you as a person and not as some random player on the street.

Another important thing to note is the nuance in this situation:

Some guys still get hurt by this on the street because chances are if they’re cat calling they’re already insecure or desperate as is which can lead to taking it out on the girl which is inexcusable.
There IS a possibility that it does work. Albeit you have to be physically attractive and right place right time sort of thing but there are SOME women who do like this because some like the attention, this is not all women obviously but some like the confidence of a man asking a girl out that he fancies out of the blue. So other guys see this and think they can get similar results even though it’s a very small percentage.

At the end of the day guys are dealt a shitty hand when it comes to relationships. You have to find someone you like, ask them out and risk rejection, you’re expected to pay for the date and bring her back home safely (these are all just expectations obviously exceptions always happen but you get the point). Cat calling is merely a by product of guys wanting to feel some sort of attention that society expects them to get without the harsh reality of rejection.

TEL-CFC_boi · 2021-12-26T23:37:45+00:00

Interesting idea. Men are so vilified and belittled if they get rejected, that it's better to be seen as a dick than a failure (not excusing it, just proposing a possible reason)

Cambocant · 2021-12-27T06:00:37+00:00

I always felt it was mostly poor and working class men compensating for their lack of status by exaggerated displays of masculine assertiveness. Sometimes it can come off as a fuck-you to women like “bitch look at you thinking you’re too hot for me, I will humiliate you to let you know otherwise.” I can certainly understand why any one would hate that. But a lot of the women that complain about it online are educated middle class women forced to rub elbows with the riff raft in whatever metropolis they’re gentrifying. They live in a world where your right to dominate others is earned by your credentials and not granted by your genitalia. Men definitely shouldn’t cat call but when all you have to offer women is your dick, there’s a kind of logic in acting like one. Once again the class element is obscured and rounded out as a condemnation of toxic masculinity and no one is supposed to really think about it beyond that.

BloomingBrains · 2021-12-26T22:58:37+00:00

That's an interesting theory. I think its very telling that so many men would rather risk crossing the line and be seen in an inappropriate/aggressive light than risk showing vulnerability. Perhaps this is a natural consequence of fetishizing and excusing male dominance behaviors whilst simultaneously punishing said vulnerability.

revente · 2021-12-27T02:08:09+00:00

Culture. There is close to no catcallig here in central Europe.

SsoulBlade · 2021-12-27T08:46:57+00:00

Men has to initiate.

This is or was a cheap way to see if a woman was willing or interested?

I suppose certain women would respond to catcalling depending on circumstances.

Could be dealing with rejection? If woman reject you all you say is you were messing around...

lorarc · 2021-12-27T11:04:17+00:00

It doesn't really happen around here much because of culture however I must say I've seen examples from both men and women doing it. It's some tribal thing where people asses their position in group and their power as a group. I've seen groups of schoolgirls saying very inappropriate things to men and I've seen groups of drunk middleaged bussinesswomen harrassing teenagers working at bars and restaurants. I don't think there was any complicated message in that other than "We're a group and as a group we're strong so you can't do anything".

Maldevinine · 2021-12-27T01:36:39+00:00

I disagree. I believe that catcalling isn't actually about the target at all.

I believe that catcalling is a process of reinforcing your masculinity in front of your peers. We're all men, we like women, we tell each other about hot women because we're sharing our hobby with others that enjoy it as well. (I should point out here that I've worked high rise construction, the classic catcalling industry) The stage where it goes from appreciation to catcalling is when you want to show your friends that you like women so much that you're prepared to risk general social censure to show it.

Algoresball · 2021-12-27T18:58:42+00:00

Catcalling is a problem. At least it is where I’m from (New York). The overwhelming majority of men who do it are homeless. Take that however you will.

Throwawayingaccount · 2021-12-28T23:00:58+00:00

"The golden rule is a terrible adage when the world is filled with both the drowning and the desiccated."

Carkudo · 2021-12-27T02:10:59+00:00

The only men I've known who actually engaged in catcalling were men who could reasonably expect no negative consequences and occasional good consequences from it. So that's one thing your pet theory completely fails to account for.

Hammsu20 · 2021-12-27T02:04:22+00:00

Only theory I've heard about it before was that cat-calling was a holdover from when we all lived in small villages and it is a way of building rapport.

Zinziberruderalis · 2021-12-27T00:21:47+00:00

Seems like over-analysis. A woman makes an effort to be sexually provocative and a man acknowledges it. That is all that happens usually.

BitsAndBobs304 · 2021-12-27T07:51:16+00:00

low-inhib high-testosterone men plus some imitating those who are behaving irrationally

Title	Why catcalling happens?
Author	NotCis_TM
Upvotes	46
Comments	65
Date	December 26, 2021 10:25 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates/comments/rp7ezt/why_catcalling_happens/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates/why-catcalling-happens.1090529 https://theredarchive.com/post/1090529

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