First Christmas alone - any advice?

Feinixaway · 2021-12-25T01:11:01+00:00

Make yourself some nice dinner, drink a good beer/cocktail, watch a movie, enjoy being alone.

On my first Christmas alone I made cheese fondue for myself, had an expensive German beer and had a really good time on my own.

Funny_Wolverine_9 · 2021-12-25T02:52:28+00:00

This is my 1st xmas alone as well. I'm treating it just like any other day: I went jogging, did some work to catch up on previous projects, went for a walk, met up with a pal. I have a couple young kids too but I'm not letting her control me and my emotions by denying access to them. I've fought for nearly 3 years and I'm moving on.

FarSatisfaction8117 · 2021-12-25T03:43:52+00:00

This is my first Christmas alone too. Think of it this way: there's 365 days in a year. And 52 weekends in a year. Just think of Christmas Day as any other day or weekend. That's how I'm surviving being alone on Christmas this year. There's so many of us (single, married, separated, divorced) who are alone on Christmas Day, or any other day, by choice or by chance. You are not alone, no matter the circumstance.

Snowbirdy · 2021-12-25T09:36:57+00:00

Traditional Christmas movie marathon:

Lethal Weapon

Die Hard

Bad Santa

If you want to do something a little more reflective, you can think about the past year, and what you’ve done. How far you’ve come putting your new life on its feet. And then you can imagine what you’re going to do next year. Maybe you’ll travel. Maybe you’ll pick up a new hobby. This is a good time to reflect and put together a bucket list for your new life.

My life was kind of a mess during my marriage and partly because of my marriage. But I take responsibility - I let it get that way. I did not leave her after we had our first child which I should have.

After the marriage ended however, my life really took off. Now that I wasn’t being held back by someone who was negative and nervous and didn’t understand my career, my career really flourished. Now that I wasn’t held back by someone who didn’t like my friends or didn’t really like meeting new people, I was able to expand my social circles and make tons of new friends all over the world. Now that I wasn’t held back by someone who hated flying, I was able to visit 40 countries in half a dozen years. Anything is possible. It’s been almost a decade, and when I look back at my 40s, when my marriage ended at 39 is when my life really came together.

My point is that although you’re probably still feeling a bit of sadness, and mourning the loss of the magic of enjoying Christmas with children, which truly is magical, you also can use this as an opportunity to imagine the future.

bbbluez · 2021-12-25T03:46:45+00:00

Is there somewhere you can volunteer? A soup kitchen, etc?

SireSweet · 2021-12-25T03:26:58+00:00

I’ve made the holidays all about me since there’s no one else to be there for. Do whatever you’ve been meaning to do. Even if that’s just catching up on sleep.

Rented a movie I’ve been meaning to watch, ate good food, drunk a bottle of wine, watched some anime, played a couple games.

MagnusRexus · 2021-12-25T06:35:08+00:00

I know this post may be a little late, but do some charitable work, even if it's just cooking and taking it yourself to those in need. Enjoy a movie, cook yourself a fancy meal, reach out to someone, etc. Just because it's Christmas doesn't mean it has to be an epic family experience every year.

Today I did some last minute shopping for when I do see my kids, made it a point to engage all my cashiers in friendly conversation, took a nice drive in the mountains listening to great music, hit the gym, called my dad. The highlight of my day was calling a friend I haven't talked to for almost a year. Most of my friends have been very disappointing to me over the last few years, so I made the call with some trepidation. But damned if talking to that big bastard didn't make my entire Christmas, he was so welcoming and loving. We made plans to do next Thanksgiving together. The point is, you never know where the joy can flourish.

This evening I cooked a nice meal and watched a decent movie (Don't Look Up), wrapped some present and am now having a drink & relaxing. People are nice, but you don't need them around constantly to enjoy your life.

Have a merry Christmas, all you guys!

toooldforthisnonsens · 2021-12-25T00:18:44+00:00

Hey brother, sorry don't have any advice. Keep your chin up. Maybe go to a church service? I'm not religious, but wander into services sometimes when a gloomy mood sets in.

bacon-wrapped-steak · 2021-12-25T03:09:06+00:00

I'm alone as well, brother. My ex took my children from me, and is currently withholding them from me. I've been waiting on court for months to hold her in contempt.

As I'm sure you're well aware, Christmas is about celebrating our savior, Jesus Christ. I attended Christmas Eve worship service tonight, and was immersed in my local community. I also attend the same Church weekly on Sunday mornings. If you aren't engaged in a local Church, I would strongly encourage you to find a good community Church and focus on your relationship with God. Believe me, it will bring a lot more meaning to your life.

Third_Eye78 · 2021-12-25T06:35:24+00:00

It’s my first Christmas semi alone as well. I see my son the day after Christmas so I smoked a joint, I’m sipping a nice single malt and listening to tunes. Whatever it is you end up doing I hope you enjoy it brother. Merry Christmas!

SirOssis · 2021-12-25T07:23:12+00:00

My first Christmas alone, too, after 20 years. I plan on not working (I’m a workaholic so this is a big deal), maybe taking a nap, and watching Die Hard before my son comes back from my ex’s sister’s house.

jayp507 · 2021-12-25T15:00:29+00:00

Online gaming

runny452 · 2021-12-25T17:11:54+00:00

I'm alone today for Christmas too. Enjoy the quiet and alone time. Make yourself a good dinner, have a beer, watch a movie. Do whatever. I'm going for a long walk through the woods today after cleaning and watching the new matrix movie tonight. Should be a good Christmas lol. I get my son tomorrow so he can open gifts from Santa.

pegleg_legal · 2021-12-27T04:05:37+00:00

Sounds like you're not doing a bad job at all. Just look forward to when you can celebrate together. Also, old music.

25_years · 2021-12-25T00:17:15+00:00

Booze. Hookers.

I've been drunk all day. My usual girl is working tonight (that is, her legit day job; she's a cop if you can believe it). But she'll be by on Christmas morning.

My kids are at least 1000 miles away, ignoring me, hating me, and who knows what else.

RepresentativeOk5968 · 2021-12-25T21:20:32+00:00

This is my first Christmas after finalization of divorce. Don't be ashamed of being alone. As many guys here know, being alone is far better than being with the wrong person. Do what you want to do today and for yourself. Have a good meal and enjoy the solitude.

Title	First Christmas alone - any advice?
Author	ZimBamBoodleOoo
Upvotes	32
Comments	31
Date	December 25, 2021 12:11 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/rny7fi/first_christmas_alone_any_advice/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/first-christmas-alone-any-advice.1090768 https://theredarchive.com/post/1090768

Comments