Once more, it's ok for a woman to be an abuser but not for a men to (obviously both are bad, don't abuse your spouses)

doomsday1021 · 2022-02-10T08:10:34+00:00

Women: (Googles any issue they have)

Google: "Here's why Men are at fault and are the root of all evil"

Men: (Googles any issue they have)

Google: "Here's why you're the villain and you are to blame despite being the victim"

peanutbutterjams · 2022-02-10T04:28:25+00:00

Sounds exactly like /r/relationship_advice.

rinkinky · 2022-02-09T21:48:04+00:00

Had to Google it myself, really insane how there’s different first results. I’ve been seeing on tiktok though a lot more support for male victims lately, it’s reassuring. It’s a little progress

2wicky · 2022-02-10T04:09:08+00:00

First off, try talking to Google about their search results and how it makes you feel. Be sure to listen to their part of the story too. If that doesn't have much affect, but Google is more or less cooperative, try tech support. Perhaps a professional might be able to help fix the situation. /s

Master-Highlight1127 · 2022-02-09T22:51:53+00:00

This shows the double standard perfectly

g1455ofwater · 2022-02-09T23:23:14+00:00

This is why exposing double standards is so important. If you don't show both sides many people will never understand where the discrimination is, but when shown together it becomes obvious.

No_Jellyfish_1885 · 2022-02-10T00:59:50+00:00

If u look at the same website for both answers the men should look into counseling if they are getting yelled at. The women should threaten divorce immediately if they are yelled at anymore. That is so fucked up.

Recentaly · 2022-02-10T06:11:36+00:00

Googled husband yells at me… First result german anti abuse hotline…

amazinglyaloneracist · 2022-02-10T08:14:12+00:00

Figures. Men have to restrain themselves from any reaction. Woman have free reign as long as and up to sometimes killing their husband and claiming abuse later.

CRCampbell11 · 2022-02-10T13:23:57+00:00

Even Google search algorithms are sexist...

bushmasterblaster · 2022-02-09T23:59:43+00:00

Isn’t it so sad that marriage counseling never works? That shit is the worst

Longjumping_Camera60 · 2022-02-10T09:41:16+00:00

Most of women(not everyone) had high ego, they would be mad and try to play the victim when you try to de-escalate the situation. It’s hard to have a decent communication when you trying to talk about the issue that need to resolve with them, because most of them won’t understand even a simplest man. Doesn’t matter how many times you trying to explain to them, because they can’t live without the drama

AirReddit · 2022-02-10T12:34:34+00:00

Equal rights bby

YesAmAThrowaway · 2022-02-10T07:14:51+00:00

Quora is about tbe worst forum to ask any question tbh. Even worse so that it's the first suggestion.

vwatchrepair · 2022-02-10T19:23:11+00:00

I tried this search.

"Wife insults me" = marriage counseling

"Husband insults me "= domestic violence support

flyingasshat · 2022-02-10T03:02:47+00:00

Had to fact check the google searches. They yielded exactly what OP has posted. Men are not allowed emotions, in any regard

NexLevelIntactivsm · 2022-02-10T01:31:02+00:00

Our own Mothers mutilated us we are the ones oppressed for real not the other way around

house6969 · 2022-02-10T03:38:21+00:00

If this is the case.. imma turn gay

Nova-Sila · 2022-02-10T02:14:57+00:00

It is so funny because it is fucked up and true at the same time

rawblackman · 2022-02-10T10:19:26+00:00

Using Google.... that was your first mistake

paralyzedvagrant · 2022-02-10T14:48:44+00:00

What the fuck

doomsday1021 · 2022-02-10T17:26:35+00:00

Wasn’t the main executive for googles American branch a toxic feminist? I remember there was a female executive who claimed to “stop toxic masculine activity” on googles search engine about 1.5 years ago

excomunicate · 2022-02-10T20:38:41+00:00

Soon it’s gona be illegal for us to break up with a girl without their written consent

AliFromIraq · 2022-02-10T20:39:31+00:00

Damn, and they call me incel cuz i decided to not get married

majestic_tapir · 2022-02-11T11:20:14+00:00

Weirdly enough, the Quora article on google for some reason has information that is utterly irrelevant.

When you click on the article itself, the pinned response is:

This behavior is NOT normal. She has control issues. This is also emotional abuse. This may be her past catching up with her. How does her mom talk to her dad? Is she bossy with everyone? Does she put you down with belittling you? All this is abusive. You need help, but she needs it more. If this has just started or been going on for years. Anger management comes to mind. She definitely has issues. When we are abused, the journey to a healthy relationship is long and painful. You can not let another day go by and accept this life. Stop it now and seek recovery. Good luck.

Next response:

No, this is not normal. First off, try talking with her about her yelling and how it makes you feel. Be sure to listen to her part of the story too. If that doesn’t have much effect, but your spouse is more or less cooperative, try marriage counseling. Perhaps a professional might be able to help to fix the situation.If your spouse is uncooperative and you both can’t come to a reasonable agreement that would satisfy both of you, you have two choices: Leave it as is. However, the odds are eventually one of you will snap and situation will escalate to physical violence. And I won’t even mention the psychological tolls of a dysfunctional relationship. If the relationship can’t be fixed, it might be better to end it outright and file for a divorce. As hard as it is, it just might be for the better.

It's not until the 3rd answer that you get a negative, so I have no fucking clue why Google opts to show some utter nonsense as a preview.

Fucked up there isn't an immediate link to DV support though. It's not even on the front page.

HeatInternational783 · 2022-02-15T16:42:05+00:00

Yeah don’t look up anything online about something that “men” would need help or direction in. It literally all comes back as “try not being so much like a man” “ask your wife how idiotic and stupid you are and ask her for her to atone your old stupid ways” it’s literally ridiculous.

StevieSnickers · 2022-02-15T19:24:21+00:00

I called the police when a previous GF was pummelling my head with her fists... that's how I woke up to start the day. She was angry that I wasn't awake to drive her son to school, who was already acting up and hitting teachers (troubled kid). She would sit online all day playing WoW while I did everything. The female cop on arrival went into the house as I had left. She went in calmly to discuss issue with ex while I'm out front with the male pig. He swears at me and says STFU or I'll cuff you. I was like are you serious?? I called you!! She was in hysterics but admitted that she hit me first so she couldn't press charges, however the cops sent me away while she "packed her things" which was all my stuff and hers. I was treated like a perpetrator because I fought back at a cow twice my weight who woke me up with her fists. SA Police, eat my nuts you maggot Bottom feeders

variousfruits7 · 2022-02-10T01:32:38+00:00

But women are oppretzel

Bron_3 · 2022-02-13T12:29:00+00:00

You know what irks me the most here? The idea that yelling is automatically abuse. To start, yes it can easily become abuse if the first response is to scream and try to promote a fear response to get what you want; fear of violence, fear of them leaving, fear of them breaking your shit or hurting themselves. Whether emotional or physical it is still abuse.

That said, it isn't always abuse by default. Especially as a man, they will bang away and see how long it takes you to crack. You're expected to have more control, and even then you're just insensitive if you don't react. You can't cry, that's weak. You can't yell, that's abuse. You can't walk away, she will absolutely follow you and keep banging away or just bring it up next time you see her. She can poke and prod for as long as she likes, but you can never say or do anything but take it and remain calm?

Like Bill Burr once said, if you get bit by a snake people would at least have some questions. "What happened, were ya fucking with it?"

SweatingSerpent1 · 2022-02-10T05:35:33+00:00

well for me search results are different from the picture. with "husband yells at me" I getting same bullshit quora advices to try to talk to the person or something.

BeepBeepYeah7789 · 2022-02-10T01:54:41+00:00

I think the same argument can be made about this post as was made on the misandry vs. misogyny Google search post from a few days ago.

Each person's search experience on Google is going to be different.

That being said, the double standards still exist and we need to fight against them.

Hot_Beach5401 · 2022-02-10T07:59:53+00:00

i think i would be good to show google's response to the other way around. I'm not saying that i don't think it's not different to what pops uo when you do, google the other way around. But it would give a better perspektive

djinthesmokys · 2022-02-10T01:45:05+00:00

I just googled “husband yells at me” and the first link that comes up is Quora with pretty much the same type of responses as for “wife yells at me”

The second link is for an article that is entitled “6 Effective Ways to How to Stop Your Husband from Yelling at You”

Then I googled “wife yells at me” and agaim the first link is Quora . The first responder states “This behavior is NOT normal. She has control issues. This is also emotional abuse. This may be her past catching up with her. How does her mom talk to her dad? Is she bossy with everyone? Does she put you down with belittling you? All this is abusive. You need help, but she needs it more. “

The second link starts off by saying “it sounds like your wife has borderline personality disorder “

What exactly is the complaint here?

Alarming_Jicama2979 · 2022-02-10T08:56:11+00:00

Have the argument in writing… no talking! Naturally de escalating. Stay less emotional & more on topic. It works for task oriented ppl but for those who love tripping on Adrenaline it’s not going to work…. Study neurological imbalance… also get your sleep, hydration & other needs met(( both of you)) check in w her, too. That is huge in Court ., must not go in w/ glass 1/2 empty…

Abstract_Knight · 2022-02-09T22:27:14+00:00

repost.

Lawful_Neutral_5000 · 2022-02-12T09:31:05+00:00

Woman here. I agree that this is wrong, and neither gender should abuse their spouse. However, it is important to keep in mind that when a woman yells at a man, he is usually emotionally hurt and fears her continuing. When a man gets angry with a woman and yells at her, she is hardwired to almost always believe he is going to kill her, even if the thought doesn't last, and even if it's a good guy. The threat of death in arguments is not as large to men as it is for women, which is why women take precautions men usually don't need to take.

Let me reiterate that it is never okay to emotionally abuse your spouse, I am only pointing out the stakes are different on either side.

UnfurtletDawn · 2022-02-09T21:31:02+00:00

I think this is good, like it is giving you at least some way to solve the issue.

azaleawhisperer · 2022-02-10T08:40:04+00:00

Is it possible that you ignore/can't/don't hear her when she asks in a temperate voice?

Is it possible that she became accustomed to being disregarded, and learned to zoom straight to the loud approach when she needed something?

2022-02-11T14:54:11+00:00

It seems you don't understand how google works.

Also, Quora is just a forum where people ask questions and others answer.

Longjumping-Resolve4 · 2022-02-12T10:20:22+00:00

That’s just how society was built as literally feminists are trying to abolish that dumbass

Title	Once more, it's ok for a woman to be an abuser but not for a men to (obviously both are bad, don't abuse your spouses)
Author	No-Mathematician-579
Upvotes	1475
Comments	105
Date	February 9, 2022 9:27 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/soofz1/once_more_its_ok_for_a_woman_to_be_an_abuser_but/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/once-more-its-ok-for-a-woman-to-be-an-abuser-but.1101520 https://theredarchive.com/post/1101520

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