So, I have been, uhm, playing, for a couple of years now. I think I've rather been lucky than anything else. But the last three nights, I've scored twice. Coincidence? I think not.

Let's cut to the chase: I started reading about living in the present after I figured I had everything in my life, but I was still not happy. I had based my life on an exterior shell - filled with money, education, status, stuff and sex. Still, I would see poor drug addicts show more sincere gratitude for any small amount of support. This baffled me.

I read about mindfulness and living in the present. This is not me telling you my way is the only way, but I see everything taught in here in a new light. Maybe you will learn something from me. Or at least I hope.

Living in the present has helped in the following areas:

  • I don't worry about talking to women
  • I don't care about what I have done if I messed up
  • I am genuinely interested in what they have to say
  • I don't give a shit if I get laid or not.
  • Better memory
  • Healthier
  • +++++++

All of this is because rather working on the exterior values - money, status etc, I worked on my core. Being appreciative of life, not judging other people.

Living in the present is basically about understanding that life is here and now. Not tomorrow. Not yesterday. Not in 10 seconds. Not in 0.000001 seconds. Right now. Always.

To really grasp the concept I suggest doing some research. I've only had Echart Tolle's The Power of Now as a guide. I'm not a guru, so I'm not going to teach you how to live in the present.

What I will share is what has changed in my game.

  • I never disrespect other people. Strangers I don't know that look weird. Gorgeous women I don't dare talking to. People I used to talk down to to build myself up. I just focus on not judging anybody. I'm not smart enough to know the world. I shouldn't try to read into everything people do. The result is that people are not scary, and they are often friendly.

  • I never regret anything I say, or do. When I make a choice, I am aware of other possibilities and make my choice based on honesty. If I'm too scared to talk to a girl - I accept that and move on. Then I tell myself later - It was ok to go, because I was too afraid to do anything. But I made a choice. I, and only I am responsible for what I do.

  • I pick out interesting girls that are into me. I pay so much more attention to what is going on around me and pick up so many vibes. Gorgeous girls are not an option if they don't give me the right vibes. She doesn't like me, and that is OK. The girl that is staring at me is a better option. Also, much more interested in talking to me and therefore more interesting to spend time with.

  • When you remove your ego, people get more interesting. I pay more attention, and this I think girls pick up on.

  • I do whatever I want. If I feel going for a kiss is the right thing - I do it. If not, I don't. But it is never based on fear of rejection if I don't. Just that I "know" she's not interested. Or, I feel it's too early. I am better in bed too. I really give it to them, and I get a totally different response than earlier.

Everything about inner game that you read about in here I now understand is gold. But I never really managed to implement the lessons to my life.

  • fake it till I make it just was not for me.

  • tellng yourself "I'm the best!" doesn't cut it for me.

  • Reminding myself that sexy girls also have to take a dump is silly.

  • Just saying that I have to be outcome independent is not as easy as it sounds. To me - mindfulness was the key to understand what that meant.

  • Approaching hundreds of sets didn't do else than giving me a great intuitive understanding. As long as I was pushing and sending of needy vibes, this didn't help. Just saying " girls don't like needy guys" isn't good enough for me if I really want to understand it.

I don't feel like writing anymore. I can probably talk more, but I am sure there are lots of other people here that can share their positive experiences from living in the present.

tl:dr

Living in the present has made me everything I wanted to be. I am pushy when I have to. I make the best choices I can in each situation. I never regret. Nor do I never worry. People like me better. I like myself better.

This might be your solution.

edit2 Wow! What a great response to wake up to! I'll try respond where it seams fit :)