Why a lot of women love assholes and douchebags.

windowtothesoul · 2015-03-23T22:52:52+00:00

It all comes down to confidence.

nor_iqhwan · 2015-03-23T20:59:09+00:00

All in moderation. For example I can say "No, you're coming with me to get a drink" but if she genuinely seems uninterested and declined, back off, apologize for your behaviour in fact. Manners and respect are two things which differentiates a gentleman and an asshole. Manners makes a man, my dear boys. Take heed

third-eye-brown · 2015-03-24T09:42:43+00:00

To be honest, I don't feel like women like "assholes". I have noticed beta males call confident/selfish guys "assholes" because they might not be as nice or thoughtful towards others but rarely they are actually assholes. Most of the time, it's just a some guy who sees a superior male and calls him asshole to bring him down, so the some guy doesn't have to work himself to improve. If you see your own shortcomings in other people, it really makes you hate the other person subconsciously, you should be really aware why you don't like others in the first place before you go call people assholes.

For example, if you are in a mindset you can't get some girl and then some other guy goes to date that girl, it's very likely you don't like that guy if you don't know him. Just remember, getting girls is about decent looks(so remember to work out), confidence and making the girl laugh, being asshole or not doesn't change that much.

jmatre · 2015-03-23T20:39:15+00:00

Don't know about 'assholes' but the points listed in bullet point are a must if you are to get anywhere in life. otherwise you will pretty much end in the garbage can.

2015-03-24T14:51:17+00:00

You can have all these traits, and still respect women. You can have these traits, and have empathy for them. You can have all these traits and treat them with respect. I think girls like me because I have all these traits, but I also have empathy and love and respect for them. I can get them wet like the asshole, but they're comfortable the whole time because I'm also compassionate.

THIS.

I won't speak for all women, because attractive traits in others aren't on some universal checklist. But a man who is confident, clear and concise in what he wants, can carry on a conversation and can effortlessly make the woman in his company feel protected and safe is attractive. But a man who can do all of those things while treating a woman like a human being is incredibly sexy.

superminhminh · 2015-03-24T14:02:15+00:00

Believe it or not, a lot of self proclaimed nice guys are simply boring. Women sometimes will take a lot of shit from those dicks because of the excitement they brings.

peetss · 2015-03-24T03:59:45+00:00

This comes down to, "The problem with the world is that the intelligent people are full of doubts, while the stupid ones are full of confidence."

Douchebags and assholes are confident of themselves due to sheer ignorance.

SandbagsSteve · 2015-03-24T19:54:22+00:00

Some of those assholes and douchebags are just attractive guys that would have gotten the girl regardless. Just like there are some women we all think are hot there are guys that women think are hot and would want to sleep with them regardless of how they act. I don't think they're always the best models to follow.

I know guys who I think are asshole that don't get girls, and I know dudes who are cool that get a lot of girls as well. I'd rather be the latter and attract girls who like the latter.

PanchDog · 2015-03-24T01:20:57+00:00

Nicely written. Especially glad that you made that very important distinction at the end which is what separates us from trp. You can totally be dominant and decisive without disrespecting women and while still having empathy. It's a fine line the rookies often cross.

Also I know this wasn't the point of your post but I have to disagree about assholes being insecure. That's what betas (for lack of a better term) wish were true. That's what they hope is the reality in order to make themselves feel better. Like, "the get a lot of girls but at least they're insecure." I see the same idea when talking about rich people who got there through crooked means. "Karma is gonna catch up to them."

No, there is no karma. Most of those rich crooks will live happily ever after while stepping on the little guy the whole way. And a lot of those assholes are extremely confident and they're gonna keep getting hot chics their whole life and they're gonna mistreat them and cheat on them and that's just life.

No point I'm really trying to make in relation to seduction lol. Just saying that life isn't fair or balanced. It just is.

2015-03-24T03:34:47+00:00

asshole = "he doesn't have time for me".

i'm a nice guy, but I've had to do more asshole things when I've gotten more abundance.

lItsAutomaticl · 2015-03-24T04:57:18+00:00

I assume that guys who act like cunts are nice at least sometimes, or else their friends wouldn't put with them.

Banana_Slut · 2015-03-24T15:26:11+00:00

I have been brought up with manners and shit and making people feel bad is not who I am. If I can be primal without being a dick, then I want that.

2015-03-24T19:16:55+00:00

A lot of my good friends said they didn't like me when they first met me. They developed preconceived notions about who I was based on a few things from my looks to behavior and they immediately said asshole. It's important to recognize that just because you think someone is an asshole, doesn't mean they are. At the end of the day, most people want to connect with others.

Diece · 2015-03-24T23:26:26+00:00

Not a bad thread. The thing that most people forget is that most alphas are criminals and end up in jail.

My dad is sort of alpha, and so is a few other guys in my family.

The number one thing I've noticed is it doesn't matter how much of an asshole a guy is if a girl sees him as a good person she's going to rationalize everything he does.

When my dad split up with my mom, my mom was devastated. She also kept saying

"Deep down he's a good guy"

"He has a good heart deep down"

Girls are attracted to alphas that to everyone else treats her like shit but to her he

"Has a good heart deep down, I know it."

joshsway · 2015-03-24T17:23:39+00:00

Eh, I think my partner TVJ did this topic much more justice on my site: https://www.joshsway.com/articles/view/how-to-be-like-mike

Rooster1981 · 2015-03-24T18:33:52+00:00

I believe all women are attracted to "assholes" due to many factors mentioned in this post. They don't put women on a pedestal and they play by their own rules. I find that you will mostly attract a certain kind of woman beingan asshole, usually the superficial or less intelligent ones. So go ahead and be an asshole, you'll probably get laid more often, but expect good woman to stay away.

MojoRyzing · 2015-03-25T04:07:02+00:00

Yea but how? Makes sense and I've known this for a while. But to actually be like this is incredibly difficult. Im more naturally empathetic and compassionate. When I try embody the bulleted points I tend to take it too far and people can tell im not "being myself" i.e. not being genuine and that never is a good thing. Plus it just doesnt feel right on me, like a very bad fitting suit. I would like to learn how to be these other ways in addition to my natural core. BUT HOW do you find this balance.

dickpaste · 2015-03-24T12:14:00+00:00

oh christ another good guy thread

bexielady · 2015-03-24T07:30:21+00:00

Chick here, I do not dig any of those traits at all. Cocky entitled fuckstains don't do it for me. Escalation without waiting for signs gets you labeled creepy as fuck or the girl will be going back and making fun of you with her friends. Just be a decent human being! I don't get why there has to be some fucked up game that goes with that. There's a difference with being arrogant and full of yourself and comfortable with yourself. Being comfortable with yourself is a HUGE turn on, no matter what you look like. Make an effort to groom yourself and be chill with who you are. Have interesting shit to talk about. Do this by living a little and having funny stories about random/stupid little adventures you've been on. Have ambition. At least allude to having the intention of making something of your life. That is sexy as shit. I dunno, I just don't get this whole "girls love assholes" bullshit. Some girls do because they have had fucked up previous experiences and they don't think they deserve better. Be the man who proves to those girls that they deserve more than some asshole dude and show them that you're the far superior alternative. I can only talk for myself and pretty much every other woman I know, but that's my 2c.

mdkcdj · 2015-03-24T12:02:29+00:00

r/niceguys

Spore2012 · 2015-03-24T12:00:43+00:00

There's a little of what op is saying, but that's usually just a phase in a healthy girl's life. The girl's who stick with that are just dating their asshole dads.

Although those chicks tend to be hot, you don't really want to date them. It's like having a classic porche when you can't afford the upkeep. Looks pretty, but too much work.

TheBadGod · 2015-03-25T14:57:43+00:00

"Asshole" and "Douchebag" is subjective.

Just because somebody treats you like shit, doesn't mean they treat them like shit.

Not everybody deserves courtesy.

moneyNmuscle · 2015-03-24T07:06:00+00:00

Or be an asshole and forget about respecting them. If they are going to be stuck up cunts then fuckem

Neat_Defiant · 2021-10-21T09:29:46+00:00

Because I'm a charming asshole lmao It's not that chicks are all about asshole dudes, but at least for me its cuz confidence and I can always talk my way outta a situation. And most times I dont even mean to be one lol, I just dont have a filter which is good and bad.

Title	Why a lot of women love assholes and douchebags.
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	247
Comments	90
Date	March 23, 2015 8:29 PM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/301w2q/why_a_lot_of_women_love_assholes_and_douchebags/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/why-a-lot-of-women-love-assholes-and-douchebags.1385725 https://theredarchive.com/post/1385725

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