Are "leagues" a thing?

AyiHutha · 2024-10-09T10:20:22+00:00

There is no red line that separates "leagues" and its different from person to person but there is a hierarchy of attractiveness

Pyroftw3 · 2024-10-09T10:44:25+00:00

no because that would mean if you approach a girl who is below your "league" or in your "league" you would have a easier time having sex with them which is not the case.

There is only 2 key things: Are you attracted to her and is she attracted to you ?

Also looks are very subjective and ive seen that by my own eyes, girl who i was very attracted to she was so nervous talking to me and sexually attracted to me that it was uncomfortable for her while some girls who i would consider like a 5-6 when i went on date thought that i am nothing special.

It realllyy depends on the girl and her type/preferences etc which you will not know until you talk to her :D

epimpstyle · 2024-10-09T11:19:31+00:00

The guy who invented that term had more experience than you or me, it is clear that "leagues" exist, even if nobody likes it.

When a girl looks good, it is not just her looks, it is a combination of looks and status (education, workplace). In most cases, her status will keep you from approaching her, while you will have no problem approaching a similarly cute girl but with a lower status than you.

The idea is to dress nice, be clean, smell good, have a good vibe and try your luck.

cpcallen · 2024-10-09T11:13:26+00:00

Yes, assortative mating is a thing that humans do, and in addition to phenotype (genetic traits as expressed by physical appearance—e.g. skin colour, size, etc.) humans also tend to select mates based on social factors.

This is probably more obvious to people who have grown up in societies with a traditional class or caste system; I think North Americans, raised on fairy tales of rags to riches and being inclined to pretend that everyone is the same "middle class", are sometimes a bit oblivious to this (but also maybe a bit more open minded about dating people from different social classes).

So at the extreme, consider: is an ivy league graduate who is the CEO of a muti-billion dollar corporation going to date a homeless drug addict? (And what about if you reverse the genders?) I mean, I guess it could happen but I think we'd all agree it's pretty unlikely.

On the other hand, might a man or woman who comes from very humble origins and does not have a great education but who is physically attractive and has a good personality be able to catch the eye of a more established, wealthy and educated person who is a bit plain-looking? That's not out of the question.

So "leagues" are a matter of degree. You'll have more luck with people who are in one way like you. Dress well if you want someone who dresses well. Get educated and work hard if you want someone who is hard-working and educated. But don't worry too much about any specific thing: lots of middling-looking guys have had good success with physically attractive women because they make up for their average looks with humour, a good personality, social status, talent, wealth, or even just prospects.

And remember that just because you think a woman is hot stuff doesn't mean that she sees herself that way: many of the most beautiful women are surprisingly bad at recognising their own attractiveness (same is probably even more true for a lot of guys, actually) and will welcome being approached by friendly, non-needy guys.

Yes, there are women (and men) out there holding out for someone who meets some specific ideal of attractiveness/desirability. I've been turned down by many (and dumped by one after dating for several months). But most of the time when I've met someone who I thought was "out of my league" I later came to understand that I had either been putting them on a pedestal they didn't deserve, or I'd been really underselling myself.

It sounds like you may also be underselling yourself. Sure: most guys are going to be rejected by most of the women they approach—but you should make the women do the rejecting, don't preemptively reject yourself on their behalf!

Crackmin · 2024-10-09T13:29:59+00:00

Imaginary limit because we go absolutely nuts for an average looking guy who vibes right

KarmicPlaneswalker · 2024-10-09T13:07:47+00:00

Is there such a thing as a girl being "out of your league"

Yes there is. Leagues are as much a male thing as they are a female one. Both parties have an innate value they place on their personal self-worth and dateability.

With that being said, aren't there levels to how human that person is, and how human you are?

Also yes. Some people are more attuned to social norms than others. Then there are those who are more logically-inclined, or who don't deal with BS drama from the emotional side of the spectrum. People can range anywhere from selfish, spoiled, entitled man-babies to cold, calculating machines, who would sacrifice their best friends if it meant bettering the world.

At the end of the day, it is paramount to remember that even though we are all humans. We each have a different and unique personality, and not all of those dispositions are able to mesh on amicable terms. Some people are diametrically opposed and will never be able to get along, while others meet once and are immediate besties for life. Different strokes.

Western-Month-3877 · 2024-10-09T14:14:57+00:00

aren’t there levels to how human that person is, and how human you are?

There should be, but keep in mind you can’t judge a person’s characters based on first impression. Reminds me of the saying “you got no 2nd chance to make a first impression.”

Yes it’s shallow and only touches on surface level, but that’s how society operates. You take a quick glance and you judge that person by her looks and overall appearance, and vice versa. If you can’t beat the system, join it.

Leewaak · 2024-10-09T14:38:15+00:00

Leagues do exists. Looksmatching is a term created for a reason. People will just tell you no it doesnt exist because they dont want u to be scared of approaching cute girls because they want to encourage you to approach.

Which is commendable but its a lie nevertheless and not the reality of things, its just like how girls always tell other girls they’re pretty even though they’re not to boost their confidence.

90% of the time girls that are objective 8-10’s will never be found in a relationship with a 5/10 guy even if he has good game. Girls care A LOT about how other girls perceive them and they care A LOT about how other girls judge them

With all that being said. Whatever you rate yourself out of ten most time you can find success with girls that are 1-2 points above your league

But you DO have a chance to pull someone way out of ur league, its just gonna be a low chance but it can happen

Even guys have leagues if u ask most guys they will tell you they go for the famous saying “ 6’s and up”

My personal experience in real life scenarios. Even i dont go for girl that are 5’s and under even if i find success with i tend to just hone my conversation skills and game with them and not escalate it further

I found more success with Cuter girls when my barber actually gave me a really good cut, my face is clear from acne in that period, and i have my good clothes on

Compared to when i havent got a haircut in a while but its still decent, and i got a couple zits on my face. Even with the same confidence in approach and same smile and good game. I get way less success like this

On OD i get way more replies and follow backs if i use a really good picture of mine, rather than just a decently nice looking picture

These are examples from my real life scenarios and experiences from a few years in the game

Auckland2399 · 2024-10-09T15:39:31+00:00

lol I’m a 5/10 imo and I get dates with 7s and 8s sometimes. Leagues only exist if you give them the power to

Dwerg1 · 2024-10-09T15:59:55+00:00

I don't think of it that way because I find it rather unproductive. I don't look at a woman and think she's above my league, she's either on my level or of lesser interest. I don't care what league they think they are or what league others may think they are. That's not to say I'm unaware of others perception, I totally am, I just don't play by those rules.

I will NEVER consider myself of less worth than anyone else, never again will I go back to that misery.

ThotBubble · 2024-10-09T17:26:45+00:00

No there is no leagues bro if you aren’t confident enough to talk to her you don’t deserve to fuck just try bro even people with terrible shooting forms can make one shot if they shoot enough shots

supportedbyai · 2024-10-09T10:26:53+00:00

Yes, in the people's minds. Look I am not that attractive but I approached any woman I want to unless she is of my grandmother's age.

Wooden_Medium1312 · 2024-10-09T10:31:13+00:00

Please, No !

Wean1eHu11 · 2024-10-09T10:48:47+00:00

Leagues only exist if you believe they exist, and if you believe they exist then you are only holding yourself back

Dandys3107 · 2024-10-09T11:06:19+00:00

I think it’s better to think about it in terms of compatibility, of lifestyle, of energy level, of temperament, needs and desires. One thing is about choosing the best partner possible, but you need to also keep it real about forming relationship that will fit within your mutual life circumstances.

nibitcoin · 2024-10-09T11:13:04+00:00

I believe yes

If you're 6 you might have 6 with natural game

But many nowadays have no game and are virgin

With PUA knowledge should hsve6a lot of 6 during let's say a year when you're 6

With very good PUA game you might have a girl out of your league but usually +1 Maybe +1.5 the best PUA +2

But if you improve (gym, face exercise and be a 7) And with PUA +1 you might have HB 8

So you have started to have 6 rarely or you're virgin and thanks for PUA and max looking you might have a lot of 7 and sometimes 8

Keel-Sama92 · 2024-10-09T11:57:29+00:00

Nah, it's just confidence. You don't have to be a "perfect 10" - just the right attitude, gift of the gab and an open mind.

therealwoujo · 2024-10-09T12:45:17+00:00

No there are no "leagues." There is no grand council that meets every year to determine what girls are good enough for which guys and vice versa.

Now each particular person may have standards as to what they like and what they do not like, and what they feel like they are too good for, but because there is no grand council making the decisions each person has their own standards, so you have no idea if a particular girl thinks you are in her "league" or not.

RecommendationNew719 · 2024-10-09T12:47:32+00:00

I think IMHO that the “league” conversation and meaning has gotten way out of hand and confused my fame or social media etc.

If person A is attracted to person B and vice versa, by my book, you’re in each others league. How much money you make, verified on Insta or even famous do not matter, it’s strictly sexual attraction

Seductive_allure3000 · 2024-10-09T13:53:27+00:00

No. I've seen some questionable people in relationships. At the end of the day, it all comes down to confidence

DonaldyPutin · 2024-10-09T14:06:26+00:00

League is a delusion we create to reject ourself. Only game is needed/enough to get laid.

Mike-Hawk-69-0420 · 2024-10-09T15:13:03+00:00

I don’t think so, especially if you’re a dude. So many girls who are “out of my league” have liked me because I can make them laugh.

OkResponsibility2470 · 2024-10-09T15:24:01+00:00

They objectively exist. There are objective qualities either gender can possess that make them objectively better looking than people who don’t have those qualities. A lot of people are yapping about “confidence” but a quiet “9” is going to be chose over a confident “5” 99% of the time and likely will expend <50% of the effort to do so.

there are niches etc that can bump you up and down, some ppl like blondes, some ppl like darker skin etc, but everyone still have a baseline

LizzoBathwater · 2024-10-09T16:54:23+00:00

Yes go on Hinge, if you want to see which league you’re in (based 95% on looks only). If you don’t get 10s of likes a day as a man, you’re not in the same league as the 9s/10s you see on there. If you get a few likes a week from lower than 7’s, maybe a rare 8, you’re average.

That being said online dating takes away personality from a man, removing a major factor in his attractiveness. Yeah you can have cool pics showing hobbies or whatever but women (and men) predominantly swipe based on looks anyway.

I’m definitely average according to my experience on Hinge, but in real life i can attract women who probably wouldn’t match with me on there.

Crafty_Bag_4871 · 2024-10-09T17:44:55+00:00

Being out of someone’s league is just a metaphor for someone being seemingly too good for you in looks, finance, or social status. It doesn’t actually mean anything unless it does by someone you’re pursuing. Friends say it to break ya balls. Parents say it so that you settle down and girls say it because they’re jealous and want you to fumble the bag. All of the examples are just as arbitrary as the saying itself. By the I mean that they have different meanings person to person and it doesn’t matter what this imaginary line is determining. You could honestly ruin your life

rememberdeathoften · 2024-10-09T18:11:16+00:00

Leagues exist if you believe in them

If you look like shrek and still end up getting a girl that’s 10 and wasn’t shy or nervous talking with and had all the confidence in the world and you didn’t treat her like this majestic woman then you don’t believe in leagues

punktfan1 · 2024-10-09T19:43:47+00:00

This video should help explain things a little simpler.

InterestingGate7002 · 2024-10-09T20:55:34+00:00

There are hierarchies of attractiveness and social standing for sure. Generally speaking people tend to date people they can match in looks or social standing, or high looks will match with high social standing. Usually women place greater emphasis on social standing, whereas men place greater emphasis on looks. However, these aren't rigid rules of how human mating works, it's not uncommon to see exceptions.

You'll see women who have high social standing that will date deadbeat dudes who just happen to be good looking.

You'll see good looking, very successful men who will be dating women are definitely not models.

You'll see hot Instagram influencer girls who are dating plain, slightly pudgy dudes who work as garbagemen.

At the end of the day, the concept of "leagues" is ultimately an arbitrary one that's going to vary greatly from person to person. It's more about what you have in common with someone else. An out of shape nerdy dude who wears video game t-shirts and stays indoors playing video games every weekend probably isn't likely to get with a girl who likes to wear slutty clothes and go to the club every weekend, because his interests probably don't overlap with hers, and they aren't likely to run into each other in the first place. On the other hand, it's also probable that they might get together if they have some overlapping interests.

At the end of the day, saying "she's out of my league" is generally just your own ego making an imaginary excuse to not talk to her so you don't risk rejection. The truth is, you never know unless you shoot your shot.

MrDownhillRacer · 2024-10-09T23:30:30+00:00

Assortive mating is absolutely a thing (hot people tend to date hot people, ugly people tend to date ugly people), but why not shoot for the moon, anyway? I'd rather shoot for what I want and fail 90% of the time than just be resigned to date somebody I don't find very attractive because "well, this is my place in life, this is the best I can do."

Wing_Inevitable · 2024-10-09T12:02:24+00:00

Are “leagues” a thing?

No.

I didn’t know whether to use the inner or outer game for this one, because that is my question.

Inner game influences outer game (aka it is supposed to be a filter or guide on what to do).

Is there such a thing as a girl being “out of your league”.

Yes there is a red rope IT appears every time you talk to someone out of it.

I’m not kidding it is like magic It just appears out of nowhere, with a sing saying “he is a low grade human” pointing at you and making an alarm that everyone in the vicinity can hear.

No they don’t exist it is a mental problem you have.

If you follow 90% of dating advice on the internet or even in real life,

I can argue as to how good the 90% advice is, but that is beside the point.

the most important thing is to be confident, be yourself, and remember that the person in front of you is human, just like you (that’s what I take from it at least).

Ok do that.

With that being said, aren’t there levels to how human that person is, and how human you are?

How would that work ?

You are more of a human because you have 1$ more ?

Who would make that criteria?

Do You see how idiotic logic gets stomped by a simple question ?

This isn’t Philosophy class. A naked chicken is not a human. If you want to argue semantics I suggest you join a debate group. In game arguing doesn’t exist.

What you said should be an axiom (a fact even if it can’t be proven - it is a math thing), not a chance to try and disprove it.

Every game (even shity ones) needs a foundation to function. That foundation is absolute for you at least.

When we tell you pick something that jives with you and stick to it - that is why - when you start removing or adding shit - the game breaks down.

You can do that when you get CONSISTENT results from it.

But even with all those things, there are still times where I’d see a girl and think to myself “you’re not even touching that with a stick”, and I don’t consider myself ugly or unattractive in general, I genuinely believe I’m pretty good overall.

This is a mindset problem. A mindset is a universal fact that applies no matter what. It has to it is a base line for something to work even 1% of the time.

It doesn’t matter if it is wrong or if it actually is realistic. It just applies. You can argue with it WHEN you get consistent results out of it.

Obviously my odds fall to 0 the moment I start having those thoughts because the girl will see as soon as I approach her, which I usually won’t.

So you proved my point. Good.

My question is, do you think that those intrusive thoughts are legitimate in certain situations or is it just an imaginary limit we tend to impose on ourself?

1 Sit in front of the mirror two times a day and repeat to yourself - “I’m good enough for any girl”

2 Go on the internet and find a model (an actual hot one ) sit down and imagine a set with her going supper well with her - to the point she ends up sleeping with you 15 min in. (Change the model every so often)

3 Get a pice of paper and write down all the cool things about you ending with the phrase “Boy I’m awesome”. Re-read it every morning before you go out and every night before bed.

Do this every day for 21 days. Than 1 time a week as a refresher.

When you will start getting the results consistently IRL you can stop.

Doctor wing. (Some type of signature)

Title	Are "leagues" a thing?
Author	Ballislife1313
Upvotes	10
Comments	48
Date	October 9, 2024 10:14 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1fzo0th/are_leagues_a_thing/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/are-leagues-a-thing.1532515 https://theredarchive.com/post/1532515

Comments