Can someone with experience explain why eventually you have to quit drugs/alcohol

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February 11, 2019
79 upvotes

I'm 25, I've met a few wise people of all ages, some still smoked weed/Drink and some say being an adult is realizing that everyone is on something, some successful some not.

I know I'm a different person on drugs then off drugs, sometimes it's an advantage and I'm more fun, As if you are finding an extension of yourself. Other times though? It's a disadvantage because you do and say dumb things.

Deep down I know that eventually for some reason... I'll have to quit weed forever, but my question is why? I just cannot see it but I know it to be true that it must happen eventually.

On the other hand some even argue you're just a boring person if you're 100% clean, I mean it's even in the laws of power.

Never appear too perfect

Question 1

People who where on and off a drugs / alcohol, what is your message you would give to your younger self? Why must you finally quit these things and are they really holding me back?

Question 2

What do I really look like to men and women? When you look back into your younger party self what is it that I cant see? Some people love me in these influenced states, I've done amazing things in these conditions... what do I really look like?


Post Information
Title Can someone with experience explain why eventually you have to quit drugs/alcohol
Author Emerald__Faith
Upvotes 79
Comments 116
Date 11 February 2019 09:07 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit askTRP
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/215432
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/apefsa/can_someone_with_experience_explain_why/
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[–]2INNASKILLZ2K18238 points239 points  (45 children) | Copy

I was an addict and dealer for 12 years. I've been clean for 3 1/2 years.

Drugs are a fucking illusion. All that 'extension of yourself' and self exploration and bullshit people think they're doing, is just lies the drugs tell you. Get clean for over a year, and NONE of the shit you saw, realised, thought about, discovered while on drugs will stay with you, or serve a single bit of purpose.

It is normally a subconscious thing you're hiding from/covering. Be it fear of being yourself, fear of disapproval, fear of just sitting with you. There are normally a thousand self centered fears that the subconscious says 'oh, this is a nice escape from having to feel that'.

To me, constant or regular drug use is a weakness. Addicts are a little different, because there is physical things that get set off once an addict uses.

Weed is the devil in disguise. That shit will take all your motivation, cloud you and ultimately give you nothing positive.

MY experience has been, that experiencing everything clean has allowed me to grow in so many ways. I also am more in touch with myself. I think about using when something is tough, and I realise 'man, I'm gonna have to deal with whatever shit is going on, eventually'. Drugs repress emotions, and if you're a heavy heavy user, once you stop, all that repressed shit comes out.

If you are an addict, and use daily, or even a few times a week, you can emotionally stay stuck at the age you were when you started using. Go lift, or meditate, or something.

Msg to my younger self? 'This shit in your hand, is going to lead to the most fucked up shit you can't imagine right now. Get off it, and put yourself first'.

Party party lifestyle never stays with you. 'Maning up' and pursuing mission, is better than any drug in the world. Get out of the pleasure palace.

[–]Emerald__Faith[S] 35 points36 points  (1 child) | Copy

Amazing response, thank you!

[–]2INNASKILLZ2K1825 points26 points  (0 children) | Copy

No worries. Don't ever use something outside of yourself, to change the way you feel. I know everyone is different, but my journey has largely been discovering emotional resilience and stoicism. We live in a society where everyone wants to take something to deal with everything.

[–]bigflame12311 points12 points  (0 children) | Copy

This is hands down the single comment that convinced me that the red pill is not “toxic” as some people make out

[–]arhombus6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

This is really a good response. I'm pretty purple pill myself but I couldn't agree more with this. At best, drugs are a waste of time.

[–]GGrub818 points19 points  (1 child) | Copy

Precisely. It's no different than a chick riding the CC pre-wall, but then she hits that hard and the fun turns into misery. That's what drugs do to a man: they add the dreaded concept of the "wall", something we don't want.

A man in his 20-30's who does drugs could be "fun" to have around, but a 40+ one is seen and treated like a smelly sack of garbage because drugs do cumulative damage to the body and mind and there's no way to hide that past a certain point.

[–]2INNASKILLZ2K187 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy

I never thought of it like that. That is an awesome analogy. It's true, too. It destroys your smv, and you definitely hit a wall.

[–]FrgElder 1 points [recovered]  (10 children) | Copy

Get clean for over a year, and NONE of the shit you saw, realised, thought about, discovered while on drugs will stay with you, or serve a single bit of purpose.

That's not true at all. Maybe for an addict, but people who use drugs recreationally/sporadically can gain new perspectives and ways of thinking. Micro-dosing drugs like shrooms/MDMA is great for working through anxiety and PTSD and working towards developing a better long term positive outlook on life. They're also amazing for destroying approach anxiety initially until you develop the skills/confidence to do it effectively without.

Micro-dosing drugs like LSD when combined with others like adderall can make you insanely creative and productive. It depends what field of work you're in obviously, but for someone in a design field (engineering or coding), it can be amazing. Obviously this doesn't do shit if you work at Subway or something.

Cannabis and CBD are a great alternative for alleviating pain/soreness, much better and safer than traditional pain meds and anti-inflammatory drugs.

Drugs are a tool. Like any other tool, they can be used properly or they can be abused. You have to be an adult and take responsibility for your own body; you wouldn't go home and eat two packs of oreos every day, so why are people having a few beers or smoking weed every day? Addicts cannot comprehend the perspective of a normal person who exercises discretion, just as I cannot emphasize with an addict that abuses any substance/activity. We are simple different genetically and should not project our own experiences on others.

[–]CalmPassenger 1 points [recovered]  (7 children) | Copy

Microdosing MDMA is a bad idea, that functions in the brain completely differently than LSD or shrooms. If you take it more than once in three months, you are doing serious damage to your brain’s serotonin receptors. No it wont leave golf-ball sized holes in your brain, but yes its neurotoxic

[–]FrgElder 1 points [recovered]  (6 children) | Copy

It depends on the dosage and consistency of use. When I use to use it, it was very sporadically (several months apart) and at small doses.

Once again, they are a tool, and as any responsible adult you need to know the limitations and potential dangers of that tool. People should not take drug use lightly at all, and should do their research before they jump into anything.

The majority of drug use is from a desire for instant gratification; whether it's weed, LSD, MDMA, or steroids. Where as I have used all these drugs to enhance or better my life in applicable doses. All of these drugs have their uses, but the user needs to be aware of their pitfalls.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (5 children) | Copy

Yeah, its just that “microdosing” usually refers to micro amounts of a serotonergic psychedelic like lsd, psilocybin, or mescaline on a somewhat frequent basis for increasing attention and performance, MDMA can’t really be used this way because it just releases setotonin instead of mimicking it like those other drugs

[–]FrgElder 1 points [recovered]  (4 children) | Copy

Microdosing has different meanings and applications for different drugs, which should be dependent on your goals with those drugs. There is not necessarily an implication of continual or consistent use, and as I said, this will depends on the drug being used and will differ greatly.

Microdosing MDMA can be effective when used infrequently to talk about and relive traumatic experiences to in a way that lets you heal and move past them. Clinical psychologists have proven time and time again that the best way to move past traumatic experiences or fears/phobias is not to repress or avoid them, but to face them head on (voluntarily only, not forced by others). This has been demonstrated through studying rape servers, where those that experienced the most reprieve from their anxiety/symptoms and were least likely to relapse were those that could relive the experience in the most vivid details possible. For people with extreme life experiences such as this or soldiers for example, reliving or even retelling the experience can be extremely trying and traumatic. Small doses of MDMA have been shown to assist in alleviating PTSD in veterans like this with staggering success rates.

[–]skippwiggins0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

So mdma can be used medically in a very select few, less than 1% of the population. I'd love to see a study on microdosing on the average adult. by the end of the trail id put my money on them all doing 10x their microdose, doing it 10x more frequently than originally intended, and 10x more depressed than they started the trial. Ive done every drug known to man, including IV all those drugs, and almost nothing compares to MDMA. Even 7 months clean from IV heroin, id still choose oral MDMA over a fat shot of H. MDMA is addicting AS FUCK because its euphoric as fuck. Its also neurotoxic, as FUCK, esp when redosed, which many people will do in a night or over a weekend. Microdosing has its place, in a medical setting only imo. Microdosing LSD or shroomes is much more viable and has WAY less longterm damage, for your average joe.

[–]DayGameChirality1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

No, MDMA is addicting AS FUCK to YOU. About half of my buddies don't enjoy MDMA. Me included. I don't find it euphoric at all. I agree and disagree with you at the same time. I found a specific computer game incredibly addictive - Dota. It was worse than IV heroin, or meth.

Though I agree with LSD & shrooms being much safer.

[–]skippwiggins0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

That's crazy, I don't think I've ever met anyone who didn't enjoy rolling once they tried it even preferred only half a pill.

I got addicted to RuneScape and league of legends really bad. Have over 200 days played on RuneScape.

[–]DayGameChirality0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I'm surprised, I've met plenty of people like that. Half of my friends (including me) get these effects from MDMA: 90% indifference, sometimes anxiety, anhedonia, not being interested in people, or music, or anything really, sedation. This is really good MDMA as well, others roll their asses off. One girl gets aggressive on empathogens in general.

I enjoy(ed) rolling, but on APBs or MAPBs. Those worked well for me. MDMA never did, and I don't think it's the fault of taking those APBs, because a friend of mine gets exactly same shitty when-will-it-end "high" as me, and he hasn't touched any drugs in his life before.

I got addicted to Dota really bad. I must have played just the Dota 2 like 9000 hours, and that doesn't include Dota 1, which I've played for years just like I've played Dota 2. Holy fucking shit did that game fuck up my dopamine system from the very age 13.

[–]goldenshoelace81 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I agree, they’re tools

[–]xddm26531 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Trying drugs is fine, habitually using them is not.

[–]Dumweight1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Love this response

[–]Novorap1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

What are your opinions on alcohol if you don't mind me asking?

[–]neso2251 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Im gonna fucking screenshot your fucking amazing message and read it when i feel down. im not a alchohol addict and havemt even tried cigars or drugs ( just alchohol) and your mesaage motivated me thank you my friend have an amazing day

[–]chasethebanks1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

This comment is pure unadulterated truth.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (14 children) | Copy

I disagree. Drugs like DMT and LSD are incredible tools if used correctly. Cocaine once in a while is amazing at heightening certain experiences. It's not black or white

[–]Kpwn8833 points34 points  (6 children) | Copy

I disagree. Drugs like DMT and LSD are incredible tools if used correctly.

I used to be into all that hippie woo woo shit, and had all kinds of "profound" wisdom and esoteric knowledge givin to me from the machine elves or whatever, but being clean for years and looking back, it was all useless bullshit.

[–]matt6754 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Lol

[–]DayGameChirality1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Hippie woo woo shit is a great way to discredit this. Maybe it was useless to you, and that's okay. However for me psychedelics tell me about things that are bigger than you, me, ego, pesky politics, silly human problems. If that experience doesn't convince you, that's your path.

[–]skippwiggins0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

The esoteric knowledge ive learned from my drug use, is still with me today after 7 months clean off heroin and benzos, and nearly 3 years clean from all other drugs.

[–]TRP VanguardWhisper1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

Okay.

Lay it on us. If ingesting a simple chemical compound that contains no information encoding scheme somehow enabled your brain to grasp profound wisdom, then tell us what you learned.

You see, humans have this thing called "language", which allows us to share insights once we have them. Not only does this allow us to benefit from the experiences of others, it also us to know when others are crazy enough to think that the feelings they have are wisdom.

Personally, I doubt you can tell me shit that isn't either obvious or wrong. The human brain is fine-tuned by billions of years of natural selection to be pretty good at figuring shit out. If improving it were as simple as adding a chemical, your body would most likely be producing that chemical itself from the pituitary gland.

Drugging up your brain in the attempt to make it work better is like putting one of those shitty grapefruit-shooter exhausts on a Porsche. You're not outsmarting hundreds of German engineers whose one job it was to make the thing run like a scalded cat. You're just ruining shit and probably making a lot of noise that makes everyone think you're a dumbass.

If you claim to have "esoteric knowledge"... put up or shut up.

[–]skippwiggins0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

I don't use drugs anymore. I don't use nicotine or caffeine. I use anabolic steroids and HGH.

You chose to wrote ten paragraphs of passive aggressive nonsense. Read some manly p hall, blavatsky or even crowley. There's a saying in occult circles, "those who know don't talk, those who talk don't know". You want to learn? We ALL do so we put in the work. Join a thelema temple, a coven, Freemasons, the golden Dawn, etc. Move up the ladder and ranks just like everyone else.

[–]TRP VanguardWhisper0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Thought so.

[–]2INNASKILLZ2K186 points7 points  (6 children) | Copy

Yeah, maybe. Whatever is someone's journey. I don't think I've come across anyone though, who has the discipline to only use a substance every now and then and for nothing but positive.

I've come to believe if that's what you can do, be a very infrequent user, you should putting enough effort into other stuff that by the time that point comes around, you're like 'what really is the point of this'?

I do know for myself, 3 1/2 years after using anything, there has been no long term benefit from any drug experience.

To each their own

[–]skippwiggins0 points1 point  (5 children) | Copy

Same here man. Except i can say being a loser piece of shit addict lead me to being clean, which led me to the beautiful life i have now. the job i have now, the girl i have now, omg this girl is just the most beautiful and put together and perfectly serene creature ive ever met. I am myself am 10x the man i was before using drugs..

[–]2INNASKILLZ2K180 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy

Beware that blue pill, man. It sounds strong in you

[–]skippwiggins0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

Her count is 3 at the age of 23. Ill treat her like the unicorn she is. She had no idea what she's doing in bed she's like a retarded kid. She's a knockout as well but has extreme anxiety so she never leaves her house, never texts guys never has boyfriends.

[–]2INNASKILLZ2K180 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Yeah, that's cool. I'm glad you found her. I'm just saying remember that NO PERSON is a unicorn. Not saying she's going to run out cheat or any shit, but don't princess her. Everyone is human. That's all. Good luck with it.

[–]skippwiggins0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Ya good looking bro I understand. I'm just very happy I found a chick who isn't toxic

[–]2INNASKILLZ2K180 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Yeah, that's good man. Sounds like she doesn't bring a lot of baggage and shit you have to deal with, that's awesome. We still always have to do what we have to do as men, in order to maintain attraction. It just makes it so much easier when you get a girl without 'problems'. That's cool.

I guess for myself, I would just remember that I can't get complacent. Gotta remain strong, driven and in control, so we don't run into AWALT. It's good, though, that you can focus on that, and not dealing with a ton of red flags.

[–]youcantstopmyzed2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Most of your points are good but the most important one is that using drugs is weakness.

I had this one friend who literally strives through the world smoking weed, drinking every day, drinking lean and doing other drugs. He’s in his mid twenties and spends most of his money on drugs and alcohol.

Every time he and our friend group wanted to go out do something he proposed to get drunk and high. Every single time.

THERE IS NO REASON TO GET HIGH OR DRUNK

He says it lets him forget. This is pure weakness, absolutely disgusting. Instead of dealing with his 1. World problems he does drugs.

If you guys hang around these people you get as weak and as lazy. Every time I see people advocating weed I’m cringing cause it’s literally not needed at all same goes for alcohol and other drugs of course. If you take drugs to escape reality you’re a worthless human being.

[–]CookieAdmiral4 points5 points  (2 children) | Copy

Recreational use of weed can help you with various problems. That little boost of creativity somehow makes you see things from different perspectives and scenarios that you could never imagine sober, thus possibly giving you alternative solutions.

[–]empatheticapathetic1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Only use I have for weed anymore. Once in a while revelations from a new perspective.

[–]KaiSmashSmashSawmash1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Then you forget it all the next day

[–]matt6750 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Thank you

[–]egoissuffering0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Very spot on. I was an addict for 6 years and once I got clean, I realized what a monumental waste of time it was. Yes I did have some good times with friends but I didnt get anything worthwhile and lost so much that I'm still playing catchup. Drugs were just a way of running away from my problems.

[–]GetMeLaidAlot19 points20 points  (1 child) | Copy

Some people try to fill a void in themselves and a lack of hobbies/ personality with drugs and alcohol; don't be one of those people. For a lot of these people, it's just a way to socialize and fit it while having a common interest with people in order to build a relationship with them. If you can't keep up the habit of drugs forever then the relationships that you had built up around those drugs and alcohols will also fade and you'll be left wishing that you spent your time more wisely and cultivating actual meaningful relationships built.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Reason why i think some people i know, who are exactly like ur description in the first part never stop... theyve built a social life/network around drug use.

[–]iwishiwasgayandcute18 points19 points  (4 children) | Copy

Question 1:

You have to quit alcohol because you do cringey stuff that you will regret. The downside overweights the benefits by a mile. I did some stuff that I regret soo much (fingering a girl and being filmed = gone viral). There are some people who can handle alcohol and know their limits, but if we are honest to ourselves, a huge majority does things they wouldn't have done if they were sober. If recommend the video of JP where he explains how he became a serious person (he really liked alcohol and behaved the way he didn't want to, so he quit it)

Question 2:

I was/am the crazy adhd type of person, who is already impulsive and gets even more so with booze. My friends thought it was funny when I was drunk because I would do all kinds of crazy shit. What they didn't saw or ignored was, that I just was harming myself.

[–][deleted] 9 points10 points  (1 child) | Copy

Could you link the video?

[–]Zen-ArtOfShitposting0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

[–]TuhTodayJr1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Dude you just explained my life :( and I’m still addicted

[–]iwishiwasgayandcute1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I do not know your exact situation, but for me the things I have done set me back on my red pill path by miles. I was building my status/social proof and destroyed everything my fucking up my reputation. If the same is happening to you, think about how you destroy your value in our society by your behavior. Look into the mirror and ask yourself if you really want to be that kind of person.

[–]jerusalemcruiser 1 points [recovered]  (5 children) | Copy

Drugs are bad, mmmmkay?

But seriously weed is great and all, but it can and will make you complacent with your current self. This subreddit is all about self improvement. This is coming from someone that has been smoking weed every day for five years and as of recently quit for 5 weeks.

I stopped smoking for a job opportunity but am probably not going to resume my old habitual use after my preliminary drug screen. The difference is night and day, my motivation to improve has finally arrived. I’m honestly thinking of quitting drinking too because I just don’t like losing control of myself.

[–]youcantstopmyzed9 points10 points  (4 children) | Copy

No weed isn’t great, it makes you lazy, weak and being stoned is retarded. I don’t get why it gets so much praise. You literally don’t need it.

[–]jerusalemcruiser 1 points [recovered]  (3 children) | Copy

Yea I agree with you, I was sarcastic when saying weed is great.

[–]youcantstopmyzed3 points4 points  (2 children) | Copy

Alright sorry man, English isn’t my mother tongue so I didn’t comprehend that.

[–]jerusalemcruiser 1 points [recovered]  (1 child) | Copy

No worries, “xxx is great and all” is typically used when saying xxx isn’t great, and is followed by the reasons for it not being so great. But yea long story short weed is a waste of money and ambition.

[–]youcantstopmyzed0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Thanks for that little lesson man.

Yea weed really makes you lazy and some people even get sad and socialize even less. It’s disgusting that it’s advocated so much nowadays.

[–]shinywhitedarkness27 points28 points  (1 child) | Copy

The constant use of drugs (sugar, porn,drugs, social media etc. I don't even make a difference anymore) supress certain thought and hinders the development of yourself, not you as a whole but your ego which is crucial for life. (Look up Loevingers ego development really interesting stuff).
Also some people use drugs after a heavy work day. But this forms into an habit any you don't know anymore what it feels like being alone after a such a day and to simply go to sleep instead of going out and drinking as an example.
In theory the rule is (I'm not there yet, but I broke the rule, trying to achieve that) you should only use drugs (in moderation) when you are where you want yourself to be, in a stable life position (being fit, having a good income etc). The problem is that you're going to have a constant fight positioning yourself on a spectrum between addiction and discipline. For some it's easy to slide to the bad extreme. So simply make sure to not fighting that fight at all.
I stopped drinking alcohol for a whole year with 19 (completely sober, no other drugs) because I drank a lot. I hated the hangovers, I hated the brainfog and I hated the depressing mood afterwards. The alcohol "high" is not worth it. I learned partying sober, having fun and talking to people. After nearly 3 years, I only drank a handful of times, sometimes I sip a little bit of beer for the taste but not more.Yet weed has a "High" that I thought was worth it the year after being complete sober. But I was wrong. Struggling on the discipline/addiciton spectrum. But hopefully going to stop it finally.

Do you love yourself in those influenced state? Can you be in that state sober? Do you want to be in that state sober?Learn to be funny when you're sober, learn to be loved by people when being sober not drunk. Learn to be yourself. Not a distorted version.

[–]TheHumbleAfrican6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

The problem is that you're going to have a constant fight positioning yourself on a spectrum between addiction and discipline.

That is so true. Good response.

[–]CalvinRichland25 points26 points  (3 children) | Copy

How is doing drugs improving anyone's life? If you are boring without drugs the truth is you are boring in them but you and your loser friens are too stoned to notice.

Climb a mountain, save a kitten, become someone interesting.

[–]trp282870 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Try doing speed or Ritalin. Gives you tons of energy and makes you want to approach people, be active in some way etc. It feels good but doesn’t take away control over yourself, if you take relatively small doses you‘ll still be able to think 100% clearly. Plus it gives you abundance mentality

The only “bad” thing is you’ll do some things without really thinking about them, for example last time I was high I approached a girl from my class and asked “are you waiting for your boyfriend?” because that was the first thing that came to mind, without realizing that it wasn’t a very alpha thing to start a conversation with. Plus you won’t really know what to do with all the energy you have

Obviously if you take amphetamines too often it’ll suck though. Don’t take them more than once every 2 weeks

[–]CalvinRichland1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Yeah, speed seems like a good way to get ahead on life... WTF

[–]trp282870 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Just try it. It’s not that bad if you’re not fucking stupid and have some self-control

[–]maljo2410 points11 points  (0 children) | Copy

For most people they eventually impact their lives in a negative way: DUI, bankruptcy, fired from a job, health problems, relationship problems. There are some that manage to use in moderation for long periods without apparent detriment.

[–]Uberfeedus9 points10 points  (1 child) | Copy

I've gone on an interesting journey with drugs, and I'll tell you they are a way to search for something to enchance life externally, when all you have to do is retreat into yourself to get what you are looking for. We feel incomplete smoetimes, like we NEED something to make us a "better" version of ourselves. Guess what? You have everything you'll ever need to be successful right now, and something external will not make it better. I do condone drug use in moderation and safely though. As I do more yoga, and meditate more, I am getting farther and farther away from drugs, and even have this sense of "why did I do that" even from drinking coffee.

[–]TuhTodayJr1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

This used to be me then I stopped meditating and doing yoga and wouldn’t you know it, I have been going through adversity because of mistakes I made and the drugs and wee and alcohol I’ll be doing, again not a whole lot but I have been smoking everyday and on day 10 ish of non stop drinking

[–]Mr-Ed2098 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

I think as you get older, drugs and alcohol just cease to be cool like they were when you were younger because better alternatives exist. Having good money, worthwhile responsibilities and the ability to navigate through society with status aren't really options to people under say 30.

When i think back to my late teens early 20s, i was going out drinking often 3 times per week and dabbling with other stuff. I was also living with parents and working shit unchallenging jobs. Drinking and 'going out' became part of my life then because everything else was sub standard. And also everyone else my age was doing it and there to enable it.

For most people, once they get their first own decent place and a tolerable LTR they're off from that life because better alternatives now exist. It sounds lame and cliche to just enjoy a night in of netflix with the girlfriend. While staying up until 6am doing lines and drinking is fun, there's a whole lot of shit times that come with it. Hangovers, comedowns, meeting dealers in dodgy alleys on freezing cold nights etc. And even then that shits only fun if there's other people on the same level there with you.

Going into a job and being challenged, having authority/autonomy, respect from colleagues and getting paid a wage that affords you the comfort to own a home and live independently, outweighs the discomforts of living to each pay check and wittling away what little cash you have on hedonistic pursuits.

[–]mabden9 points10 points  (0 children) | Copy

> what is your message

Bottom line - drugs/alcohol consumption to excess is a fucking waste of valuable time and money that you will never get back.

> What do I really look like to men and women?

Do not give a fuck.

.> what do I really look like?

The real question is what do you look like to yourself? Ridding yourself of outside influences (drugs/alcohol) will allow you to find your true self. However, micro-dosing LSD and/or psilocybin may open pathways (read Center of the Cyclone and Simulations of God by Dr John C Lilly) to self realization. Haha, that is what I thought I was doing whenever I got high, (back in the day, we called weed weed because it weeded out all the bullshit.)

I was a frequent user/abuser of drugs/alcohol in my younger days. More drugs than booze as getting drunk almost always got me in trouble. I.E. totaled car, fights, missing out on pussy, etc. Never considered myself addicted to either, so stopping was not an issue. Although, quiting cigarettes was the hardest fucking thing I ever went through. I have done all types of drugs; coke, weed, hash, heroin, mdma, speed, barbs, mushrooms, peyote, lsd. My booze of choice was beer, then tequila and finally scotch. I stopped tequila after a wild 22nd birthday where I ended up hanging out my bedroom window puking and passing out on the floor with my dog, instead of the bed with my gf. I still have an occasional scotch, for the taste. Once I started working out, beer left my life and my abs returned. The non-weed drugs were mostly experimental and easy to leave behind.

Drugs are fucking expensive, so I dealt on the side to keep me in free weed/hash. I quickly discovered that selling drugs led to temporary wealth and unless you are sitting on the top, not a smart career choice. I reduced my weed use incrementally/situationally. As an example, I roomed with I guy I worked with who smoked constantly. Bowl upon waking, breakfast and a bowl, joint on the ride to work, bowls at lunch, then nonstop for the rest of the night. Next day; wash, rinse, repeat. I got sucked into it until one day after a lunch of really good hash, my foreman gave me a job requiring me to climb a ladder, perched on a scaffold, leaning on a beam about 6 inches lower then the ceiling. In all I was 40' in the air, but my state of mind was higher than the ceiling. I did have a safety harness on, but was literally shaking while trying to work that high up (pun intended.) That ended the daily ritual of getting high before/during work.

Weirdly, the company I worked for went out of business, so I went back to school. Weed and college were not compatible (high school seemed different though) so I became a weekend warrior which lasted until I finished and started working R&D for a fortune 500 company. Drugs by then were a distant past. Oh, the weird part is I had connection delivering bales from some unnamed South American company, as my weed use went down, my dealing went up to help offset not working while in college. That dried up when their stash house got busted. By that time, I was tired of the constant paranoia, so ending my drug cartel days :).

In the end I felt I wasted at least 10 years of my life pursuing an artificial existence/state of mind and worse, put myself at risk for losing another 5 - 15 years.

Not sure if any of this is relevant to your situation, (it was cathartic for me) but maybe there is a message somewhere in this ramble from a guy who has been through a lot of the drug culture (watch 'drugstore cowboys' for a glimpse.) Peace.

[–]vivid_mind25 points26 points  (4 children) | Copy

Alcohol gives you the feel of being confident but doesn't make you confident. In fact it ruins how you should process emotions. Once you see that and decide to quit, you'll have to spend time (probably with therapist) to learn how to feel and what to do with it again. After a while you realise that people who drink just look stupid and it will make you cringe you were one of them. I can see how easily I was influenced by alcohol propaganda as if you cannot have good time without a glass of drink. Think. As for weed, I think that's beneficial for health when using sparingly. Don't make a habit out of it unless for medical reasons.

[–]tb0n22 points23 points  (1 child) | Copy

this is true. If you are sober for a while one of the frustrations is that you realize 90+ percent of people don't know how to have a good time without alcohol. Alcohol is their be all end all for having fun and measuring how much fun they had. Then they are amazed and insecure when they ask about my weekend and I spent it running around doing fun activities instead.

[–]LethalShade1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

What do you do for fun that doesn't involve alcohol?

[–]VikkBlack3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

What do you mean it ruins how you process emotions, can u elaborate? Im trying to grasp your perspective, I drink once or twice a week while going out with friends

[–]xddm26531 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Funny I am the complete reverse on your analysis. Pot makes people act so stupid imo but a little drink is good for the health. I guess everyone's different

[–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

As Louis CK so perfectly put it:

“You should never do drugs... EVER. So that when you do do them, it’s amazing. You don’t want drugs to become another pain in the ass”

Anything you depend on to be yourself, is something to avoid really... with that said... I can’t quit coffee, and with that knowledge I’ve never tried a upper beyond a few lines of cocaine at stagdo’s. And a few MDMA pills at house party’s.

I have an 18mo son now though, so I’ve basically quit so I can be as mentally present as a father as possible... I get my pleasures elsewhere.... it’s all relative

[–]GucciGangBucks5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

I quit drinking because it naturally didn’t fit my lifestyle anymore. I love working out and Jiu Jitsu. If I drink even one day it messes up my workout schedule. Not to mention I no longer had fun going out once I got like 23. Idk what happened it was just like a switch in me that it wasn’t for me anymore. All your “friends” all of a sudden will never talk to you again when you stop as well.

I was considering starting a wine hobby so I at least have a good date idea lol

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Imo thats only for hard drugs. An occasional legal weed or drink is acceptable.

If you wanna stop all drugs thats good for you tho. Great. Nothing wrong with that.

[–]Endorsed Contributorleftajar3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

This happened to me, maybe it's true for others:

  • As you age, drugs literally don't feel as good as they used to. Yet, at the same time, the hangover/comedown/whatever actually hurts worse.

So, eventually, you hit a tipping point (usually a nuclear-shitshow-level hangover), when you realize, "this fucking blows and it isn't worth it anymore."

  • Additionally, HOPEFULLY, at some point in your adult maturation, you figure out what you're supposed to be doing with your life. For me, it was realizing I'm actually very good at starting businesses. Suddenly, all that potsmoking made it a lot harder to get things done.

So, at some point, I started to perceive it as a sacrifice: how much do I care about succeeding in my business? Enough to reduce/quit pot? Again, somewhere along the line I hit a tipping point, where the answer became, "yes."

So, it's a process. If I had known all of this ten years ago, I could've gotten a lot more done. No question. But it takes the time it takes.

[–]BuzzLightGear321 1 points [recovered]  (15 children) | Copy

Are you addicted? Could you go clean for 2-4 weeks right now to prove it, or would you cave in after 5 days? I smoke cigars, weed, take mushrooms, drink alcohol, and a few other drugs. Right now it's been at least a month since I've done either (but only a week since I drank). Nothing wrong with it since I use it responsibly, and I don't use them to feed an addiction. I plan to never stop because they are not a problem. Can you say the same?

[–]subrosa2155 points6 points  (3 children) | Copy

Deja Vu! I said the same thing years ago. I tried to convince myself and others that I had it under control. Funny enough the more I made a point to tell other people how in control I was - secretly I really wasnt. It was a case of classic projection of the opposite. I was so lonely and afraid under the delusions of self control when it came to drinking and drugging. Now with over a year of sobriety through 12 step recovery I feel so much better not having to shoulder the weight of fake self control. I can let go and relax for the first time in life.

[–]ghost_atlas0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

I'm trying to get sober again, I did 10 months last year. I'm struggling, the thought of having to be vigilant about it for the rest of my life kills me.

[–]subrosa2150 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

The thought of doing anything for the rest of my life is overwhelming. That's why we focus one day at a time in recovery. Becoming more and more present with ourSelf, we will regain the wonder of a child toward the world - which will cease addictive craving. We must re-enchant our perception of the world through being present to the eternal moment that's already here despite the egoic minds never ending thoughts. I wish you the best in your ongoing recovery. PM Me if you want to talk more my friend!

[–]jaznex4 points5 points  (10 children) | Copy

you convinced yourself that you are not addicted by abstaining and then using. what lie do you tell to yourself when you start using again?

[–]xddm26533 points4 points  (7 children) | Copy

If OP can go a month sober he has absolutely no substance problems.

[–]jaznex0 points1 point  (6 children) | Copy

untill he will spiral out of control. he doesn't take hard drugs and alcohol serious and he is not admiting that he has a problem aka using substances that make him feel better. that's addiction one on one for me.

[–]xddm26531 point2 points  (5 children) | Copy

None of the drugs he mentioned are hard drugs. He never said he uses them to feel better either

[–]jaznex 1 points [recovered]  (4 children) | Copy

so mushrooms and few other drugs seem to you like morning coffee?

shrooms can get you really fucked up to the extent that you don't know the difference between reality and your imagination.

but ok, he is on the right path with using substances every now and then.

[–]xddm26531 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

If you think mushrooms are hard drugs, your definitions are lacking. You think people go to rehab for mushrooms? Pot is a worse drug than that

He sounds matured and disciplined so he'd be on the right path regardless.

[–]jaznex 1 points [recovered]  (2 children) | Copy

no but they go to the psychiatric yard

[–]xddm26531 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

I didn't. OP didn't. But it seems you are trying to commit him to one

[–]BuzzLightGear321 1 points [recovered]  (1 child) | Copy

ad·dict·edDictionary result for addicted /əˈdiktəd/Submit adjective physically and mentally dependent on a particular substance, and unable to stop taking it without incurring adverse effects.

Educate yourself.

[–]jaznex4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

if you say so

[–]SoloQueueXL4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

I only smoke weed when I'm about to fuck. I quit alcohol and cigs because they give me erection problems

[–]Popeman7913 points14 points  (4 children) | Copy

I'm in my late thirties. I'm still a regular drug user. I smoke weed almost every day (although very little), and I do a variety of hard drugs regularly.

I'm also in better shape than I've been in the last 10 years, have just been promoted at work, and am in a happy ltr.

I think it's different for everyone. The key is to not lie to yourself. I could tell myself that drugs are doing me good, but it can only be true if my improvement is concrete and measurable. I hold myself to that standard. If my life isn't improving, I just cut all drugs cold turkey until things are good again.

I guess I want an excuse to use drugs, so I always make sure I'm doing well in all areas. It's a negotiation with myself.

[–]thecarryone5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy

You did not ask for my opinion. but you should take easy on coke. I have a few of friends that are not the same and never will be.

[–]Popeman795 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yeah thanks, I appreciate it. Coke is the only one that scares me a little. It's also the only drug (apart from cigarettes and alcohol) that I feel has absolutely no positive thing about it.

[–]Pajca2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

What are you using?

[–]Popeman796 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

coke mdma shrooms lsd pregabalin aprazolam

[–]linsanity2016 1 points [recovered]  (1 child) | Copy

I think drugs/alc is fine as long as you get your shit done FIRST. Get your work done first and then in your free time you can engage in such behavior. I have the work hard, play hard mindset. If you get your shit done who cares what you do in your free time. However, if the drugs/alc is effecting your work thats when it becomes a problem and should be decreased or eliminated. Life's short so I think you should be able to engage in anything you want as long as you still achieve your long term goals.

[–]genethedog1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

This is me. When I am gonna hit the beer and the pot, its only when my schedule is clear and all other bills, groceries, commitments are taken care of. If I have to work the next day I can use this technique most of the time. Yes, sometimes I'll somehow convince myself that I'll be in bed early enough to be fresh in the morning and it hasn't worked but this is pretty rare. Usually after a series of high stress events/days. Maybe happens every couple months. Besides that. LIVE IT UP!

[–]dmi_32 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Because to be a good performer, someone who knows his shit at work, you must have your brain together 95% of the time.

Alcohol and drugs prevent you from being so. Weed Kills motivation and melts brain. Alcohol.. well, I've never been an alcoholic, but you've can't really work when you are always hangover.

It's a matter of being a grown up person. At 25, I didn't understand it. Now at 28, I do. So it's good you're asking this question.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Because you waste your money, isolate from others and die an early death

Idiot

[–]7and7UntilHomeless2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

One of the simplest explanations I was given about why you shouldn't drink or do drugs is that it makes you "ok" with being bored. Instead of sitting around getting high and doing something mindless you should be taking that time to improve something about yourself, learn something or hone a skill.-

Some of the other comments have mentioned about how there are some enlightenment aspects to certain drugs. I can tell you from experience that they are important in that moment but overall fleeting. Plus generally they are nihilistic in take away which doesn't help you become a better person.

You also never see someone who is struggling to do more drugs. Activities, behaviors and people who ruin lives should be, as a rule of thumb, avoided.

[–]msaintx2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Is coffee a drug ?

[–]HurricaneHugues2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Used to be a huge pothead. I'd say drugs are like taking a vacation. You just can't take a vacation all year

[–]Chadster1133 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy

Sounds like you’re really concerned with how people see you

[–]GGrub88 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

In regards of drugs/alocohol, he should be.

I'd never trust these people with anything important, whether it's a job or a personal matter.

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy

Turning 30, love drugs, take them occasionally.

Don't see myself ever quitting, they are super fun when in the right place and time.

[–]liberty11271 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Put it this way...I stop making excuses...quit smoking weed and now I'm making 100-150k more a year doing literally the same job with a little more driving and responsibility.

Don't let any drugs hold you back from advancing at your age. I'm 25 as well.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

A lot of trps 'rules' (ie no video games, quit gaming, no porn, no weed or booze etc) are in place as they tend to be tripping stones for newbies.

All the above is fine - in moderation. Thing is, a lot of guys here are working to undo a life times worth of mental conditioning, and it's easier to do this by removing crutches.

Personally, I'm TRP 'End game' (ie mid 30s, highly successful upwardly mobile career and lifestyle, plenty of girls available to me etc). I smoke weed several times a week, enjoy gaming when I have time and like a few drinks a couple times a month.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy

being an adult is realizing that everyone is on something....

Whoever told you this, I don’t believe this is an adult realization.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Sounds more idiotic than something a ten year old would make up

Like seriously, why spew all the BS?

[–]PurpleSweetz1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Recovering addict here, so I can give more experience and reasoning than may apply to the average person. But simply put, it’s a method of getting “outside of yourself”, falsifying true feeling and emotion, a quick way to surpass negative emotion (e.g. ‘liquid courage’ in the case of alcohol), and a form of instant gratification. You cannot benefit physically, mentally, nor emotionally from drug/alcohol use. Put them aside.

[–]throwawaybpdnpd1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I used to smoke/ingest weed every day then at some point I took a tolerance break and all the motivation in the world started coming back.

Now I smoke once a week, usually on the weekend; it's a choice I made so that I can live a better life

I also take shrooms twice a week DURING workdays, those are the best thing I've ever taken and actually help very much with concentration and social behavior

[–]garebear199590 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I smoke weed almost everyday.not really because I’m bored or anything,I do boxing and play guitar so boredom isn’t an issue.

It’s just my poison.never liked alcohol or any of the other shit people do.

That said,drug aren’t cool.

[–]BlueIowa0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I am past my twenties. I quit everything for 1.5 years and experienced tremendous growth. Psychedelics are a catalyst for growth as well, so I now use them once quarterly. I still see no benefit from drinking other than fitting in socially, but this can be achieved by simply holding any drink in your hand.

[–]A_Wizard17170 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Ironically I stopped doing drugs but im addicted to reddit lol

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

You dont need to quit smoking weed, I know people who are 80 and smoke.



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