Why shouldn't you date a former slut if you yourself were a player?

TyroneTheDriver · 2019-06-27T14:03:32+00:00

It takes 0 effort to be a slut.

It takes a lot of effort to be a player.

The game is different for men and women.

CainPrice · 2019-06-27T14:10:53+00:00

Show me a man who's fucked 100 women, and you're showing me a man who's decent-looking, fun, interesting, and socially skilled.

Show me a woman who's fucked 100 men, and you're showing me any old girl who says yes a lot. In fact, she probably has low discipline, poor impulse control, bad judgment, and mental health issues that cause her to seek out and value attention from lots of men. Not to mention, you have to wonder what the fuck is wrong with her. The median partner count for women is under 10, because most women have boyfriends - sex with the same person multiple times instead of sex with lots and lots of people one time each. Why the fuck did nobody want to date her until you?

TheBleachedTshirt · 2019-06-27T15:07:00+00:00

A "former" slut.

Casanova-Quinn · 2019-06-27T15:00:42+00:00

Jim Jefferies said it best:

"Every single time a man sleeps with a lot of women, he’s called a stud. But if a woman sleeps with a lot of men, she’s called a slut. And people think this is unfair. Not! It’s completely fair. And I’ll tell you why, right? Because it’s fucking easy to be a slut. It’s fucking hard to be a stud. To be a stud you have to be witty, charming, well-dressed, have nice shoes and a fab job. To be a slut you just have to be there. There are fat ugly sluts out there. There are no fat ugly studs."

goudamac · 2019-06-27T14:32:43+00:00

A key that opens many locks is a precious key. A lock that can be opened by many keys is a worthless lock.

jackandjill22 · 2019-06-27T17:55:26+00:00

I dated a slut in college. I once kissed her hand while out in public in the afternoon(yeah, I know, I was a betamax) and it smelled like she'd been masturbating if that gives you any idea about her drive.

She'll have orbiting "guy friends" and exes who've had a taste and will come back for more. It's kinda funny the first time some simp is texting her or calls crying while she's in bed with you, but it's less funny when she's in the bathroom texting her ex at 2 AM.
Sluts are often sluts because they have a Cluster B personality disorder or being abused when they were young. The truth is that very little is known about the brain and even veteran mental health professionals are essentially trying to put out fires with dixie cups filled with water.
During her slutty "phase" she will bang guys way above your social status and sexual prowess which will leave a strong impression on her psyche. EG, one evening she'll remember her fling with Dr Chad the 6'3" marathon runner, look over and see you on the couch watching Netflix, and get resentful.

SwoleyMoleyFrijoley · 2019-06-27T16:15:43+00:00

Not for me. Women control sex. If she's letting 100+ dudes into her snatch she is impulsive, more likely to cheat, has poor decision making skills, and was apparently willing to have a baby with over 100 guys. (Sex ALWAYS has a chance. Life finds a way).

Not to mention her pair bonding is not going to work anymore. Thousand cock stare is a thing. I'd rather have a stage 5 clinger who's a HB7-8 over a HB10 who's had more dicks in her than a urinal.

omega_dawg93 · 2019-06-27T14:59:26+00:00

men are valued for their TAR (time, attention & resources).

women are valued for their beauty, femininity & fertility.

a woman giving up her womb freely... to be impregnated by just anyone, to catch STDs, etc while expecting nothing but cum & a good feeling is the equivalent of a man giving multiple women his TAR and expecting nothing in return, ie, he's a fool with $.

any woman who brings up this shit needs to answer one question:

while you're running around giving away pussy, is it ok for your future hubby to be giving away all his money, time etc to multiple women and getting NOTHING for it... running himself into debt?

when put in this context, they (almost) understand bc women live in the moment. always.

as the saying goes, "men spend their lives trying to get credit for all the good they've done... women spend their lives trying to avoid punishment for all the depravity they seem to love."

F_Dingo · 2019-06-27T14:50:59+00:00

ya you can go and date a slutbag, but don't be surprised when she can't last more than 3 or 4 months in the "relationship".

Slutbags are damaged goods, they're liked used up and beat to shit cars with 400k miles.

CamoWoobie10000 · 2019-06-27T14:26:07+00:00

Because I don't want to date a slut, men and women are different. If we were the same then women would be fighting wars over virgin cock.

I dont feel like my preferences need to align with what I offer, especially when the value assigned to male sexuality is different than female sexuality. If its okay for a 5'2 woman to want to date a 6'2 man then its okay for me not to want to date a slut.

andyturbo2000 · 2019-06-27T15:23:27+00:00

A man’s primal drive is to fuck as many women as possible and spread seed. A woman’s primal drive is to sort through the riff-raff and find a quality man for reproduction.

It’s against nature for women to ride the cock carousel and those that have done are unusual and come with the associated damage.

Men are programmed to fuck where and whenever possible. When women do this they are going against the grain, which affects future relationships and social operation.

BurningOrangeHeaven · 2019-06-27T14:22:48+00:00

I've thought about this too, like, everyone fuckin a lot of chicks is pretty much adding to the number of sluts out there. But at the same time, i could never see myself settiling down with an actual hoe.

Huffnagle · 2019-06-27T15:53:13+00:00

All this stuff about how easy or hard it is to be a slut is completely irrelevant.

The real answer is girls who have had a lot of guys are less likely to pair bond. When she gets bored, and they all get bored, she’s less likely to have that deep commitment to help keep her loyal.

N count doesn’t seem to have the same effect on men.

razenha · 2019-06-27T16:25:34+00:00

It's easy to be a slut. It's hard to be a player.

VasiliyZaitzev · 2019-06-27T16:52:32+00:00

He mentioned that I myself am no saint.

So what? This is the sort of fake equalism that women usually peddle. Are you sure your buddy isn't really a girl?

Men and women are different. Men's ability to pair bond isn't affected by banging a lot of women, but women are affected by getting run through.

It's call the "Thousand Cock Stare" not the "Thousand Twat Stare" for a reason.

[deleted] · 2019-06-27T14:51:32+00:00

Lock vs key. Female smv goes down with the count while male smv goes up. You’re thinking with your dick.

SupremeBBC · 2019-06-27T16:11:24+00:00

The fact that you're considering dating a woman you define as a slut this highly is laughable. So when she gives you progeny are you going to tell them mama is a slut too?

brinkleybuzz · 2019-06-27T16:40:52+00:00

Women generally seek commitment. A slut is a woman who has either massively failed to get men to commit to her or has no interest whatsoever in a stable, monogsmous relationship.

Why would you select someone like this for a LTR?! That's like hiring an employee who has either been fired from or job-hopped through dozens of jobs.

[deleted] · 2019-06-27T17:03:30+00:00

do you even sidebar bro

Auvergnat · 2019-06-27T20:56:02+00:00

You don’t hold to the same standard people with completely different capabilities. You would judge a professional car mechanic and your 12-years-old sister with different standards of quality of servicing your car.

It’s incredibly hard for a random guy to sleep with many women because women are picky. So being a stud is a sign you’re quality mating material and in high demand. A woman would have good reasons to want to lock you down, with the caveat that you’re a risk of deserting her.

It’s incredibly easy for a woman to sleep with many men because men are horny. So being a slut isn’t a sign of quality whatsoever. Pairing with one though definitely presents the risk of you ending up raising a kid that’s not yours, and that’s the reason for men’s primal distrust of promiscuous women.

Lazygeniiuss · 2019-06-27T15:44:57+00:00

The truth is you’ll be hard pressed to find a girl without a high body count. Assume every chick has a bad number and don’t even bother asking her. This keeps you fixed in reality and when you look to try and marry someone you can look past the idealized pure virgin idea you’ve created about her and get to brass tax. Look for practical important things. Does she take care of herself, is she nice, does she have a good job, does she want kids. Are your goals aligned, is she clean, is she a good cook etc. shit like that.

Hedser91 · 2019-06-27T16:07:13+00:00

Any thoughts? Well my thought is the following: you can either pick a slut or a woman that's lying about her body count. In this world you better make peace with the fact women have a higher body count then you probably have. Depressing thought but its the thruth. Women lie a lot my friend, dont ever ask them about their body count, its either high or they'll lie, you cant win.

FlyingSexistPig · 2019-06-27T16:26:33+00:00

"Now I'm stuck wondering if it's wrong of me to hold her to higher standards than I hold myself"

Because men and women are different

Siccunt99 · 2019-06-27T17:30:00+00:00

In my experience most of the sluts i've met had friendly personality,but i know a lot of chicks that were in a year+ LTR that are entitled bitches(daddys girl).

Minhha0510 · 2019-06-27T17:39:28+00:00

Men create values, women keep it. Its far easier for a girl to be a slut than a guy to be a stud.

To be a stud you need to be good-looking, witty, charming have nice shoes and a fake job.

To be a slut all you need to do is have a vagina. Preferably a huge pair of tits.

the13thmonk · 2019-06-27T19:38:23+00:00

Let's take your friends' mental frame and say that being a player / slut is bad.

It's perfectly fine to want a chick who has a history that increases her odds of being loyal to you, whilst not having that same history. Also women pair bond, men don't. As other's mentioned being a slut vs player is different.

And this is one dynamic of your and her person.

Viscount61 · 2019-06-27T19:44:33+00:00

Why shouldn’t you drive a used car that’s had 15 prior owners, if you used to be a used car salesman?

cracksniffer666 · 2019-06-27T20:06:29+00:00

There are no fat, ugly studs. Remember that. Also social media has made hypergamy run wild, so when you fuck up, another "stud" will be there to catch her weak emotional state, and of course, she'll give in. Good luck dude.

hazelstein · 2019-06-27T18:15:30+00:00

aw hell nahhh.

_Last_Man_Standing_ · 2019-06-27T19:14:05+00:00

A lot of people say the the reason not to LTR a slut is the difference in effort needed to become slut/stud.
I don't think that would be a good reason not to LTR. This is a true fact but it has nothing to do with ability to pair-bond.

Not to say it's a good idea to LTR a slut.
To elaborate:

The main reason not to date a slut in my opinion is: After a certain n-count women lose the ability to pair bond!
Why you ask? Well let me tell you :)

- for men sex is a physical experience. (it can be emotional as well but not with everybody and not often)
- for women sex is an emotional experience... EVERY time... even the one night stands.

Read "Sex Good Method" for more information on this.
And if you take into a consideration the brain chemistry of dopamine and serotonin.
People get addicted to it. And when they get addicted to it they need larder and larger dose/stimulus to get the same effect as before ("Chasing The Dragon" in drug terms)

You can search for RP term "Alpha Widowed" for more info on this.

Or just look for articles on addiction. It's the same stuff.

To summarize: Men can pair-bond even after 100 sexual partners because the experience of sex is not an emotional experience.
Women can ruin their ability to pair-bond even after one alpha. And after a whole carousel of alphas it's completely impossible.

Link if you want some more research on this topic: The Truth About Sex - Stefan Molyneux

Eminencemiddle · 2019-06-27T19:36:34+00:00

A key that opens any lock is worth much. A lock that many keys can open is worthless.

SaharaFatCat · 2019-06-27T20:07:11+00:00

Depends on the definition of date. I will never marry. Who cares for a good time? You both get something from it.

If you're not jealous... Enjoy it for what it is and move on. If you're jealous... Don't do it. Don't get her pregnant.

DatingTank · 2019-06-27T20:16:41+00:00

It's like the difference between being fat in the United States and being fat in Ethiopia.

2fassy · 2019-06-27T21:13:07+00:00

Its about probability really,

A slut is most likely unable to stay in a ltr due to pair bonding issues

Sluts also usually have mental health issues

High chance she will cheat on you

Shes probably an alpha widow

Shit like this, its not so much that shes taken lots of cock, its really that the taking of lots of cock is a the physical manifestation of underlying issues and certain undesirable character traits.

DeborahBinLaden · 2019-06-27T21:41:44+00:00

What more do you think “getting serious” will bring you other than the sex and awesome personality you’re already experiencing..?

dani098 · 2019-06-27T21:43:23+00:00

I personally don’t give a fuck. I’ve been with some young women that gave some incredible blowjobs the obviously learned it somewhere. Then again I’ve been with women they were 26 through 28 years old who are very out of touch with her sexuality and it sucked

Like I said, personally I don’t give a fuck but you better know how to fuck

[deleted] · 2019-06-27T22:18:12+00:00

I sure as hell wouldn’t. I may get a lot of flack for this but in order for me to enter a serious, genuine relationship with a women is if they’re a virgin. I guess that makes me a hypocrite, but so be it. The only sanctimonious way for a woman to give her body up to a man is through the act of marrying said man.

HurricaneHugues · 2019-06-27T23:56:55+00:00

Do it and find out. What's the use of us telling you why?

Bruchibre · 2019-06-28T00:24:44+00:00

So according to your stupid logic since I'm ugly I shouldn't seek to date pretty girls?

All these broke ass girls should not expect their bf to have money, all these tiny girls should not demand to date tall guys? Girls standards are unrealistic.

Why would you force yourself to date someone you are not attracted to? If you have abundance hey not having all the standards you want?

FieldLine · 2019-06-28T01:38:17+00:00

Because I don't want to.

SpinPlates · 2019-06-28T03:21:31+00:00

Because a key that opens a bunch of locks is a "master key"

A lock that opens for any key is just a shitty lock.

mrpthrowa · 2019-06-28T10:11:42+00:00

Biology.

Men are designed to compete and spread their semen everywhere

Women are designed to find the best male and lock him down, or lock down a provisioner (aka beta)

We're different, not equal.

[deleted] · 2019-06-28T15:01:06+00:00

A key that opens many locks is a master key.

A lock that can been opened by many keys is a worthless lock.

SalporinRP · 2019-06-28T15:59:50+00:00

First of all, a slut vs a player are two very different things. Being a slut is easy and being a player is hard.

But even if they were the same... So what?

This isn't the UN I don't have to be fair. Non-sluts make the best LTRs/wives so I would date a non-slut.

CrimsonShiv · 2019-06-28T16:51:49+00:00

just date her, and date others, who gives a fuck

xoxuv · 2019-06-28T18:01:19+00:00

Because no slut is a "former" slut.

Because men and women aren't equal. Women always are certain of being the mother of any baby, but the man can't biologically be certain, so men and women get opposite value from promiscuity.

Because a man follows his own interest. If she gives bad feelings, there is no point in being attached to her.

Those said, nobody tell you to not date a slut. Just don't get feelings.

throw_this_far_awayy · 2019-06-27T14:16:03+00:00

To me 100 is a lot for a man or a woman. How about thinking in terms of a slot machine. The previous spin has no bearing on the probability of hitting a jackpot on the next spin. So thinking this way means no matter how many times that machine has been spun it has nothing to do with your chances when it's your turn.

Ghrev_233 · 2019-06-27T16:20:10+00:00

All a girl has to do to be a slut is open her legs. Do you know how fucking hard it is to get some pussy?

lapeparoja · 2019-06-27T21:44:56+00:00

My thoughts are that your friend is a moron and you are one too, or a troll.

Imagine a woman saying:

"Is it ok if my boyfriend cries a lot and like to use thongs? After all i have done that too"

"is it OK if my boyfriend is gossipy , like to buy lots of shoes and it is not interested in a career, after all, I am like that too"

I can continue but I hope you get the point.

Foolishoe · 2019-06-27T16:18:21+00:00

I love sluts. Lots of prissy bitches around here find a used pussy to be the devils curse.

I judge a woman on her ability to fuck, her ability to behave, and her ability to not only avoid fucking up my life and her own life, but actually contribute and be a positive influence upon the world around her.

Anything less than average in all these things and exceptional physical beauty is a plate.

setsuna0 · 2019-06-27T15:54:19+00:00

What if I wasn't a player

OilyB · 2019-06-27T16:56:34+00:00

The greatest value of the woman are her body and her ability to remain faithful. The greatest value of the man is NOT his body and his ability to remain faithful but his ability to pull his woman up to his level in the world. That's why men can marry down. Women only marry up.

Men's mission are not the same as women's missions. And thus their worth doesn't stem from the same values.

Besides, it's always your responsibility to choose someone who is really more trustworthy than yourself or equally trustworthy. Even if you're not trustworthy yourself. It's called self preservation. I just personally prefer cheating on her than her cheating on me.

Edit: Further more - girls who have been overly attention seeking, intimacy hungry, overly free with their body already have a problem. The sluttiness is just a manifestation of that psychological problem. Wanting sex is more of a biological need for young men. It's not firstly a psychological problem.

cornbread07 · 2019-06-27T15:05:31+00:00

All women are sluts. So it doesnt matter

maljo24 · 2019-06-27T16:30:00+00:00

You could not explain it because there is no difference. Obviously wrong to hold someone else to a different standard than you hold yourself.

tuckastheruckas · 2019-06-27T16:55:22+00:00

TBH your count is concerningly high. Have you ever had a long term/serious GF? Have you ever cheated? When it comes to relationships, I think past counts are irrelevant, but if you or your potential partner has a history of cheating, then it's pretty concerning. If both of you are nymphos, it's gonna be a spicy relationship haha

gamerbike · 2019-06-27T16:31:49+00:00

If shes not damaged by those experiences, I don't see why not, If she could be a great mother to your children I don't see why not.

Real men don't ask for what they cannot provide.

Title	Why shouldn't you date a former slut if you yourself were a player?
Author	iwishyoudstopstaring
Upvotes	120
Comments	168
Date	June 27, 2019 1:56 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/c65tr8/why_shouldnt_you_date_a_former_slut_if_you/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/why-shouldnt-you-date-a-former-slut-if-you.243652 https://theredarchive.com/post/243652

Comments