If a man is not having lots of sex, does that automatically make him a loser?

ifelsedowhile · 2016-02-20T07:49:09+00:00

feminists constantly use the not-getting-laid-shaming-tactic so they actually think a man not having a lot of sex is indeed a loser while simultaneously claiming that men shouldn't be pressured to measure their self worth depending on how much sex they have. don't try to find coherence or logic in their reasoning because there's hardly any. they're just irrational and mentally unstable people.

Bluer_than_Red · 2016-02-20T06:59:47+00:00

No, him not having sex does not automatically means he's a loser. Not every guy can or will be viewed as being attractive. Most men in human history didn't reproduced; it's only through marriage (recent patriarchal construct) that the ratio of men and women reproducing has been closer to one another.

However, if he actually feels entitled to sex or if he is only attracted to models or if he as you say view himself as a "10" despite him being a 3 or 4 then yeah he's a loser.

Shaenon · 2016-02-20T09:08:55+00:00

No, who cares? He can do whatever he wants.

Carkudo · 2016-02-20T06:57:57+00:00

He would only be a loser if he really wanted to have sex but couldn't get those opportunities for whatever reason. If he is abstaining by choice despite opportunity he isn't a loser.

2. Would this behavior indicate there is an underlying issue with the guy? Would this problem be fix-able?

If a guy is simply unable to get an satisfying sexual experiences without paying for it, there is definitely an underlying issue.

[deleted] · 2016-02-20T06:59:52+00:00

No. It makes him a badass who has so much sex available he doesn't put any value in it. This means he can focus on making his life better instead of obsessing over vagina like men are ought to do.
Doesn't sound like a problem to me.

TheRealMewt · 2016-02-20T14:47:38+00:00

Was Tim Tebow a loser before he got married? Because I'd be hard pressed to find someone who would say yes.

[deleted] · 2016-02-20T15:50:46+00:00

If a man can't have a lot of sex, then it is because he's a loser.

Being able to get what he wants is the sign of an attractive man.

Carkudo · 2016-02-20T08:28:03+00:00

As one such man, I would say that yes, it does.

It shouldn't, there's no reason why it should, there's no reason why one's sexual success should matter in other areas of his life, but as OP aptly puts it - it happens automatically.

[deleted] · 2016-02-20T10:37:07+00:00

He's probably just a very attractive man with low T or strong religious conviction.

kathydurst · 2016-02-20T14:54:07+00:00

It's an indication he's likely a loser.

gasparddelanuit · 2016-02-20T08:35:30+00:00

'not getting laid' is a shame tactic for both men and women. if a woman is bitchy or testy, people will often say 'she needs to get laid.' something about sex is that powerful i guess. calms you down i guess?

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M7782 · 2016-02-20T08:45:14+00:00

Most single men would not pass up the opportunity to have unlimited sext with a mystical 10/10 woman, unless she had mental issues (crazy), then most sane men would likely avoid her.

[deleted] · 2016-02-20T09:29:12+00:00

If a man is not having lots of sex, does that automatically make him a loser?

If he defines "winning" as having lots of sex, then yes. To be anything, you have to do something. The loser, loses. If you're not losing, then you're not a loser.

How you define "winning" is up to you, and there will always be somebody who defines it differently. Whether they think you're a loser doesn't matter. Only your ideas about what it means to win can determine whether you succeed.

Lets say hypothetically the man has unlimited access to sex to a woman he thinks is a 10/10. Lets say that he's doing great in all other aspects of life, basically. Does not having sex make him a loser?

I'd say no, because he has access to her and he chooses not to have sex with her. He has not set a general goal of having sex and seen that goal denied. He has chosen for himself what he desires, and lived accordingly. Seems like a winner to me.

Would this behavior indicate there is an underlying issue with the guy? Would this problem be fix-able?

If you mean to ask whether it is necessitated that there's something wrong with a guy just because he doesn't bed a woman he finds attractive, then no, it's not. If you reverse the question, and ask whether there are issues that can produce this behavior, then yes, there are; fix-able and non-fix-able. Whether it's a problem depends entirely upon whether he is capable of following through with his decisions and living as he chooses to.

edit: Because one of your comments clarifies things, OP...

you misread. he has access to a girl he believes is a 10 so its not an issue with attraction. he just does not have the urge to have sex often.

That's a question for a medical doctor. It depends upon his age, environment, level of stress, fitness, general health, nutrition, and psychological state.

Also...

actually an RP man is who was telling me this type of man is a loser.

Sounds like that RP man is a little too concerned about how other men use their private parts, and that could be indicative of repressed homosexual tendencies. But that's none of my business.

Swanksterino · 2016-02-20T15:03:04+00:00

I feel like this PPD sub wouldn't even exist if people actually read TRP, all the way through, without bias. Some of the questions here only serve to show that someone has read to a point, got completely hysterical on a point, then made up all kinds of crazy absolutes based on the a half baked, and way imbalanced understanding of the topic.

Let me help pare down some of these questions. Anything that sounds absolute, or one size fits all, or "does (this) mean (this)." kind of false dichotomy, the answer is no.

SirNemesis · 2016-02-20T15:54:23+00:00

Wait he can have lots of sex but doesn't? That makes him un-virile. Loser is when he doesn't have the access to sex.

Xemnas81 · 2016-02-20T17:02:21+00:00

'If Chad has a 10/10 DTF but chooses to focus on his exams instead of pedestalising the bish, is his name now 'gina-Free Geoff the loser?'

Wut

hedonism_bot_69 · 2016-02-20T19:46:05+00:00

No, not the way you phrased it. Now answer me this. If a man really want to have sex and cannot? Does it make him a loser? If a girl can sleep around but doesn't does it make her a loser?

voteGOPk · 2016-02-20T21:31:59+00:00

If that is his goal, then yes.

by the basic definition of not getting what you want makes you a loser.

EmpressofMars · 2016-02-20T22:54:03+00:00

No wtf why is someone having sex or not automatically conflated with self worth

ummidkhi · 2016-02-21T00:48:20+00:00

no, that makes him husband material (unless he's gross looking)

[deleted] · 2016-02-21T01:11:34+00:00

No, I'd say he has some excellent self control.

[deleted] · 2016-02-21T01:12:45+00:00

The causation works the other way around here. Losers don't get laid. It's not that not getting laid makes you a loser. It's being a loser makes you not able to get laid.

So yes, there's correlation between being a loser and getting laid. And other aspects of life are good and all - but (according to Freud, I believe) all we do is for sex and power. So if your school nerd is doing great in classes but can't get laid - he's still a loser and will be seen as one by peers.

RareBlur · 2016-02-21T18:30:49+00:00

What if I told you a man is only a loser if he thinks that of himself?

ClarityofDisaster · 2016-02-22T15:34:38+00:00

"Does not having sex make him a loser?" Absolutely not. If he doesn't want sex, then he doesn't want sex. I don't understand such a view personally, because I'd do it everyday with my partner if possible...but hey, different strokes for different folks.

"Would this indicate an underlying issue with the guy?" Maybe, maybe not. Depends on why he's declining the sex, honestly. If it's due to being asexual or voluntarily celibate for religious and/or individual ethic reasons, then there's nothing wrong with him. If it's due to being raped/sexually abused in the past, having an intense fear of intimacy/vulnerability, worries about sexual "inadequacy", or haphephobia (fear of being touched), then his declination of sex is just a reaction to something else that needs to be addressed. As someone who does have haphephobia and has worked many years to get it under some semblance of control, I can honestly say that it drastically affects one's ability to have sex, even if it is quite readily available.

Anandya · 2016-02-20T08:35:10+00:00

No he's not a loser and no there is no issue with the guy.

haikufun · 2016-02-20T15:24:42+00:00

No. How does skin touching skin increase or decrease anyone's value? Except herpes, hpv...ahh...more sex is more likely a negative.

eddiae · 2016-02-20T15:58:51+00:00

yes, it is an instinctual animalistic thing, the top dog in apes is the one that gets a harem while the rest rots, so if you see a man with all the females instinctively people make him a winner in all the other areas in life. women use virgin, not getting laid as an insult all the time too so they think so even more than men.

Title	If a man is not having lots of sex, does that automatically make him a loser?
Author	i_have_a_semicolon
Upvotes	7
Comments	102
Date	February 20, 2016 6:49 AM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/46p1xm/if_a_man_is_not_having_lots_of_sex_does_that/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/if-a-man-is-not-having-lots-of-sex-does-that.276128 https://theredarchive.com/post/276128

Comments

2. Would this behavior indicate there is an underlying issue with the guy? Would this problem be fix-able?