Having difficulties breaking up a friendship with a male gamer

fuzzytoefungus · 2020-12-15T03:58:25+00:00

[deleted]

Phoenix__Rising2018 · 2020-12-15T03:57:20+00:00

[deleted]

warinmymind94 · 2020-12-15T05:29:21+00:00

You should look for groups of women that game! If we weren't in covid I would suggest seeing if there was a convention or an event where you could befriend other women gamers. Maybe you can find some other ladies to share gaming advice and tips with through this post? I don't know much about gaming bit if there's a way to share gaming usernames so you dont give away your personal info then you can play together.

You should beware of male/female "friendships" as an adult and since we are all here trying to become High Value women. Hear me out, In most of my experiences and my girl friends experiences and seeing posts online - male / female friendships are never just friendships. Usually the guy has a romantic interest in the girl and hes just waiting for his opportunity to get with you. Guys see the friendship as a safe way to keep the girl around, bond with her, and they'll wear her down so she trusts him and gets comfortable- sharing things, opening up, hanging out, and even being alone together. This was he gathers information on her in hopes its easier to hookup. Or he may even try to have a triangulation. I personally don't date gamer guys - gamer men are usually addicts. They don't just game a little bit to have fun- they're obsessed and will spend hours upon hours sitting on the couch playing day and night. They spend their money this way and are generally broke and loosers. We also know your friend is a porn addict, so it shows that he thinks of women as objects and if he gets to have sex with anyone hes gonna be lousy in bed from porn sickness.

It won't feel so hard to cut him off when you make new high value women friends to talk and game with!

threedotlove · 2020-12-15T04:07:28+00:00

Gamer here. There are tons of non-gross people on the internet to game with. Find them. Hang with them. Drop this guy.

burpleseaurchin · 2020-12-15T04:17:46+00:00

Men who play video games are literally a dime a dozen, especially if this was an online friend. You literally have nearly unlimited options here, even if most of them are LVM, it usually doesn't take long to filter enough to find someone better than this guy, ime.

FabledAngryVillager · 2020-12-15T04:05:30+00:00

"it was a light-hearted comment sheesh" his joke was fine, but your rebuttal wasn't?

Most people are scum. Some are more scummy than others.

This can be complicated when we otherwise get along with a person. But he sounds dismissive of you, even when you were polite about your disgust.

He's not the only gamer out there, male or female. It just might take some time to find the decent / compatible ones.

I have found zero ppl tbh with my sense of humor (I'm not saying it's good) that also play the one game I play. They're either misogynistic POS, we just don't vibe, or they're toooooo far left.

It sucks, but I'd rather have it this way. You just have to know what you can deal with... And is it worth it?

Vmwvi · 2020-12-15T06:09:14+00:00

Drop him. Trash gamer men are half a dime per thousand. He enjoys videos terrible enough to be banned on that website, and plenty of women play games. He is NVM, he causes stress and adds nearly nothing to your life.

2020-12-15T14:57:44+00:00

"My friend likes watching videos of my gender exclusively, choking and gagging on penises while tears stream down their faces, should we be friends...?"

🤔🤔🤔

EclecticBarbarella · 2020-12-15T04:23:43+00:00

Just the fact that you’ve started seeing these things and turning them over in your mind means he’s on his way out. Trust me, things like this can’t be unseen and I honestly believe you’re just delaying the inevitable and throwing good time after bad. Once we remove things from our life that are not beneficial or that don’t align with who we truly are, we clear time and energy that can be directed into better relationships and connections. If you’re stuck spending time with this dude, you might miss making a connection with someone who has the same interests but doesn’t make jokes about the exploitation of women. Maybe start a sub on Reddit for feminist gamers, it sounds like there are a lot of women on this thread even that would be interested in communicating (although I know it’s not quite the same as IRL friends)? Maybe there already is one, I don’t know?

Zayelle · 2020-12-15T11:38:03+00:00

I recently ended a similar friendship. But not because of porn, because of victim shaming in rape cases. And a HUGE lack if empathy.

I would advise you to find a fan group for the specific game you play (there are tons on Facebook, I follow the Overwatch one for instance). And ask for someone to play with you there.

honeybeeroll · 2020-12-15T21:01:17+00:00

The gaming community is HUGE. Clearly this is an important interest of yours, but being anti porn is also important to you. You can find friends who both like video games and are anti porn. Just this post alone is full of women who are like that!

What games do you play? I'm only now getting into current gen stuff because I finally replaced my 8 year old laptop lol. Mass effect, dragon age, animal crossing, the old assassins creed games, and zelda are some of my favorite series.

whysoDinosaur3 · 2020-12-15T18:59:49+00:00

Fds gaming buddies! I'm so down for this!

janetheautomaton · 2020-12-15T04:13:53+00:00

Excusing abhorrent behavior because the person is 'otherwise okay' or you get something from them is itself LV behavior.
Are you really good with a friendship founded on "Well, there's no one else?"

2020-12-15T06:47:14+00:00

Honestly, you could just start distancing yourself from him. He's not your boyfriend, you don't need to sit him down for a talk and list out all of the reasons why its not working out. Just start filling your time with other friends and don't feel pressured to explain why.

Also, there are plenty of people who enjoy videogames out there. It is a very common hobby. I know that its easier said then done but Im sure that you will be abke to find other people to play with eventually.

oh_shit_oh_fuck · 2020-12-15T10:20:18+00:00

I’m sorry but I’m really starting to believe it’s impossible to be friends with men, unless they are homosexual. I really do believe they always think they have the potential to fuck you. Tell them you’re completely unavailable to dating - celibate, even, and watch them treat you with a complete lack of respect. I too had a porn watching friend, and I enjoyed hanging out with him - we used to cook together and talk about really interesting things, and just like you I was torn because it’s my favourite thing to do but I don’t know many people who enjoy it too. I decided it wasn’t worth it though. I told him I’m a radfem and he went OFF. Called me a nazi. Started acting like a pig and insulted the size of my breasts. Pathetic.

YukiCatKingdom · 2020-12-15T16:12:06+00:00

Block him, or at the very least change his name to "pornhub boy" or something like that in your phone. I also enjoy gaming, mostly on the switch and ps4. Hit me up if you want to talk about games!

Softrito · 2020-12-15T16:32:54+00:00

There's an app my therapist suggested once called Meetup. You can find all kinds of groups on there with date of events. I went paintball shooting once and had planned other stuff before covid.

onceuponasea · 2020-12-15T14:43:12+00:00

By you remaining friends with him, you are subconsciously telling him that it’s okay that he made that comment, and to not question his depraved way of thinking. Let him go. There are plenty of good people out there who will game with you. My conscience would never feel okay remaining friends with him after that comment and I think deep down you feel the same because you are on here.

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Title	Having difficulties breaking up a friendship with a male gamer
Author	usernamewhichisfree
Upvotes	62
Comments	34
Date	December 15, 2020 3:41 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/kddynz/having_difficulties_breaking_up_a_friendship_with/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/having-difficulties-breaking-up-a-friendship-with.505620 https://theredarchive.com/post/505620

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