Their is always a part of me that wants to be nice and give ugly guys a chance..

supremelyparanoid · 2020-05-08T03:45:18+00:00

I know the feeling. Just gotta keep in mind that even ugly scrotes who barely finished school still have an astronomic list of “preferences” (read: obligations). So definitely don’t settle for less when it comes to looks

lival42 · 2020-05-08T03:28:13+00:00

Yeah no. Feeling a hot man beats out feeling sorry for an ugly man.

mightbethrowawayyy · 2020-05-08T03:26:39+00:00

Why do you want to do that? Just because you pity them? But they will not see you as a savior if you give them a chance. They will think they deserve you because of their kingly personalities and take you for granted

thegypsybean · 2020-05-08T07:56:55+00:00

Don’t feel bad. I “dated” down thinking he was a safe choice and that maybe I should give a dude who was not my usual type a “chance” (and also partly because my friend really wanted us to get together because we had so much in common).

Point is, after a month of dating me, he decided that he was “never attracted” to me from the beginning. For the record I’m pretty evenly distributed for an hourglass shape, and I’m conventionally attractive.

And this was coming from the mouth of a dude who had gained about 20-30+ pounds from October of 2019 to January 2020 when we met. That’s a scary amount of time to gain that much weight in such a short period of time. I saw why obviously—he had no limit on eating and didn’t workout or anything. He really had no ground to stand on when it came to talking about attractiveness. Even my brother took one look at him in a photo I took and he was like “ew you dated a chubby guy?” 😂

So no, I don’t have any inclination to feel “sorry” for the ugly guy. Because more often than not, they’ll get a beautiful woman like you and me “giving them a chance” and suddenly their ego becomes sky high and they start thinking they’re the shit when they’re really not, and take you for granted. It’s a disorder for sure.

finalbosskitten · 2020-05-08T04:22:30+00:00

Do me a favor--gently slap your pity off a cliff. It'll be a mercy kill. First of all, men are never quite grateful, often use women they find ugly as training wheels, and effectively no reason to take pity on them as they're basically the same as any other man. It's also immoral and cruel to date out of pity. I mean, it'd hurt me if I learned my man dated me out of pity. Saw me as a charity case. Duh. That's one backstab to the ego and heart. It is not nice to give people you find offputting a chance. Yes, contrary to popular propaganda. It's just a push to render women into being more public sexual property so men can use them as stepping stones.

Imagine lowering your standards to people you can't even bare touching...like...what even is the point of dating, then? We starting a dead bedroom circus for clowns? Hm? You're really better off pouring your pity into a shelter dog that's been there for months T B H.

Your heart isn't meant to be a gas station rest stop for travelers you find fugly...and I hope you do know that even if you dated the ugliest man in the world it genuinely wouldn't make you more or less shallow cuz your desires are intrinsically set. Hell. If anything, intrinsically, you might even be more shallow because you'd be acting for facetious reasons...trying to prove you're not a shallow person and using a man as a living soapbox to preach on for this reason rather than dating via sincerity.

So yeah. Case closed.

cirrus_cloud · 2020-05-08T09:16:07+00:00

Never feel sorry for them I notice when you give these losers a chance they get cocky and arrogant over it. My ex literally emotionally cheated on me and dump me to date the other girl. She ghosted him when he told her what he did lol. For 2 years straight he always calling me a cheater and had the nerve to be a cheater. I don't honestly see any benefits in dating men you don't find attractive. Men on the internet love trying to convince women they can't go wrong dating a ugly guy. Bitch I regret it and never again. All those posts "women are happier with uglier men" can go to hell more like insecure women are happier with uglier men. It's weird how on the internet they keep going with the narrative that all attractive men are cheaters or users because they have more options. But these same men I bet any money hate it when women be judgemental about all men. But it's okay for them to be judgemental.

Also, I use to give guys benefit of the doubt but these assholes really made me realize they don't deserve the benefit to look pass everything that's wrong with them. Trust me they don't do that for women, they can't get pass over our "flaws" or "ugliness"

maraslove · 2020-05-08T12:03:07+00:00

Did this. 10/10 don’t recommend. They get cocky once they get the good looking girl and treat her like shit. Also, ugly ass guys are super manipulative.

throwaway23004345 · 2020-05-08T03:57:03+00:00

Do men ever think that of women?

Exactly

Davina33 · 2020-05-08T11:55:58+00:00

Been there and done that. They are worse than the good looking ones.

DaneShook · 2020-05-08T11:18:40+00:00

Used to be me.

Then I found out when Ug-a-mugs lock you down, they’re just as much of a dickhead as pretty boys. They catch attitudes and treat you like you’re the ugly one! Lmao bitch byeeeeee.

cirrus_cloud · 2020-05-08T09:15:41+00:00

Save that pity for something useful.

ErikaNaumann · 2020-05-08T14:08:53+00:00

I dated an ugly guy. Short, skinny, weak, and he tried to destroy my self esteem. Lesson learned, I will never date down again.

Remember, even ugly guys won't give any ugly girl a chance. They have no pity for others. Don't feel sorry for them.

Cobmobster21 · 2020-05-08T16:00:23+00:00

Don’t do that shit. I gave a fat ugly guy a chance because I thought he was nice. The sex was bad and he only used me to get back at his ex who dumped him. I should have taken the hint.

2020-05-08T16:19:11+00:00

Personally, I'm not someone who is big on looks. I have zero issue with people big on looks, having physical standards because I've learnt the hard way being with guys I'm just not physically attracted too.

Then I'd lie to myself "oh I'm attracted to his personality"

His personality:tumbleweed

I did always feel bad for the not so good looking guys... The ones not good looking because they didn't wash or groom themselves, shave, wear form fitting clothes, be obese

They'd always ALWAYS say girls don't give them a chance and I'd feel so special because here's me, giving them a chance

None of them would have a personality or many if any interests, they complained a lot, had untreated mental illness they refused to get help for

So no, not anymore. Guys words mean fuck all to me. I don't care if you complain girls don't give you a chance or "I'm so nice, females like jerks", fuck off

reallyhatesyou · 2020-05-08T03:13:27+00:00

In my experience, ugly guys have been just as bad as hot guys. Shit, last guy I dated wasn’t perfect but was the hottest/best to me out of all the guys I was dating at the time. Nothing worse than saying yes out of pity to go on a boring date with a non-cute guy and pay for yourself. Girl. Don’t do it

Lamastu5 · 2020-05-08T11:33:42+00:00

NO!

never, ever give ugly man a chance. first, he aint gonna treat you better out of thankfulness for choosing him. no, think leonard from TBBT. he's either gonna treat you so bad your self-worth diminishes so you end up being on his level of confidence, or he's gonna 'upgrade' and ditch you for a better looking woman (this is self-delusion on his part; he won't be able to find a next hottie, he's gonna fail miserably).

also, you will start resenting yourself and him because you are were not and still aren't attracted to him.

attraction cannot be negotiated.

OptionalPies · 2020-05-08T07:52:04+00:00

I tried this. Thought he was a good man, so i compromised on looks. He still cheated.

nymphaetamine · 2020-05-08T19:55:38+00:00

I used to date ugly/fat/slobby guys in the past, thinking that since they aren't able to get by on looks then surely they would have a great personality to make up for it and would appreciate me because I was able to look past their exteriors. LOL. Some of the most abusive, lying, unfaithful, manipulative, absolute no-value assholes I've ever dated were also the worst looking.

The funny thing is though- most of the things that made these guys ugly boiled down to a lack of self-care and hygiene. The guy with bad skin and an unkempt beard could have been much better looking with a nice shave and some skincare. The fat guys could have been attractive if they adopted a better diet and started exercising. The guys with greasy stringy hair could have been downright cute with a good haircut and regular showering. They made no effort to be attractive, and that's a huge LV trait. If they neglect themselves, they will neglect you too.

Not everyone is born with traditional good looks. There are some physical factors that are truly out of a man's control, but they aren't a big deal if he's clean, groomed, and takes good care of himself. One of the biggest things I've learned over the years is that it's all about effort.

kiyankiriam · 2020-05-08T21:49:52+00:00

I used to feel that way. But didnt do much. Dont force yourself to be attracted to someone youre not attracted to. Its recipe for disaster.

Title	Their is always a part of me that wants to be nice and give ugly guys a chance..
Author	supremelyparanoid
Upvotes	79
Comments	47
Date	May 8, 2020 3:10 AM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/gfl9db/their_is_always_a_part_of_me_that_wants_to_be/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/their-is-always-a-part-of-me-that-wants-to-be-nice.676731 https://theredarchive.com/post/676731

Comments