I saw something on Twitter about men being rejected and not being able to handle it. That got me thinking about how men and boys of the last few generations have been socialized to get to this point. I eventually landed on a reason: participation trophies and the cultural shift that coincided with them.

Participation trophies became a thing in little leagues during the 90s when the pay to play model became more common. No longer were there definitive losers and winners, everyone was equal no matter what you did. One of the first real opportunities for boys to compete was now being watered down. This is part of why I believe gaming became huge among boys in the 2000s, they were able to compete and actually win. There were negatives to it but scratching that primal urge was amazing.

This ideology quickly spread to schools where suddenly everyone needed to be included. I believe socialization is crucial to a boys development but forcing it doesn’t do him any good. Sure he won’t sit alone at lunch in middle school, but he’s very likely to be abandoned in high school. He’s never had to face adversity and now he’s being smacked in the face with it.

No one really knows how to deal with it because this only became an issue in the last twenty years. Said boy now turns to gaming/anime/the internet as an escape from socializing. He never fixes his problem and he misses out on milestones or hits them embarrassingly late.

Is what I’m saying crazy? Did participation trophies have no effect on boys and men? Will this trend continue or is there a way to fix it? Any discussion relative to the topic is welcomed.