Does body image play a part in men's sexual failure?

throwaway3649_ · 2021-06-29T09:14:03+00:00

Correlation does not imply causation.

A sizeable percentage of men (I'd say close to 50% if not more) have never gotten complimented on their physical appearance and see their body as an asexual object. Quoting Mark Twain, "I can live for two months on a good compliment". Men usually remember compliments for years because they are so rare.

This and their "sexual failure" has the same underlying reason - they are not attractive to women.

mrcs84usn · 2021-06-29T06:08:19+00:00

Puberty is an odd time for a lot of men. Between voice cracking, often being super skinny and not developed the muscle mass to go with their growth spurts, all the new hair, etc, there is bound to be some self-consciousness going on.

I wouldn’t go so far as to correlate it with simping for women though. I don’t follow that line of thinking.

BarestBranch · 2021-06-29T06:22:19+00:00

I definitely think so. I’ve had a low body image since my early teens and it has made me a lot more inhibited. I still have a very hard time seeing myself as a sexual being.

Goodthingstartssmall · 2021-06-29T09:08:16+00:00

I think it's more of mental confidence image. Peers treat everybody with double standards and many guys growing up get "put in place" if they try to present themselves as sexual beings. This results in a negative feedback loop devoid of anything which can foster confidence.

mechanical_elves · 2021-06-29T06:54:32+00:00

You have it backward. With the exception of traumas, sexual failure or sexual desirability is what determines a guy's body image, not the other way around.

Same for women.

pisssssssssssxyz · 2021-06-29T09:24:34+00:00

yeah because during the stages of early development and puberty boys who play sports/are socialized around them are typically treated far better by females than ones who don’t. People say “oh then just join a sport” but they don’t realize that you must be either a.) larger than usual (the case with 99% of players) or exceptionally talented. Usually, size wins so you see all the tall/big kids in football/soccer/whatever and they get attention from girls.

You really think the average dude is getting attention during this stage? Fuck no. He’s literally in the shadows of the others, and middle/high school girls are as cruel as they get. Believe me, the reason a lot of men are obsessed with this idea of “SMV” is because 99% of them have learned it and where they stand by senior year of high school.

Meanwhile, most every girl is getting pursued or has had the validation of at least one dude showing interest in her. If you want to date a dude in high school as a female, literally just have a pulse and don’t be morbidly overweight and it’s easy. Getting invited to parties is 10x easier, and you will be valued for just being there. Not nearly as simple for the males though. You gotta prove your worth bitch

ohheyhi99 · 2021-06-29T06:19:27+00:00

Yes.

Also, a guy’s attractiveness level affects how forthcoming women are towards him. If you’re an awkward guy without the crutch of being attractive, you’ll probably have a harder time getting started than you would otherwise and have an even worse impression of your body image and potential.

makinganimerealer · 2021-06-29T06:32:31+00:00

Women hate unattractive men, so it's less "I hate my body" and more "Oh, so that whole beta bucks thing is a con to get paid while still cheating with the guy they want."

Eastuss · 2021-06-29T09:31:38+00:00

It's not a low body image that dampens men's sexual growth. It's rejection that dampens their growth and generate low body image.

Men are generally more accurate than women when auto-evaluating themselves.

As a result they become maladjusted and simp for women instead of presenting themselves as potential sexual partners.

That is caused by blue pill education, from parents, schools and medias.

CantBonkThis · 2021-06-29T06:44:32+00:00

I don't know what reply are you expecting other than "IDK, I guess?"

passepar2t · 2021-06-29T09:53:44+00:00

It's not body image, it's body shape.

TheDevilPutD · 2021-06-29T06:07:03+00:00

Yes men have an issue with their self image and self esteem. And no you don't need to be Chad Chadinsky to get a girlfriend. You just shouldn't be anxious and full phobias and have a pair of balls.

SheHadStyle · 2021-06-29T07:14:59+00:00

How does a sub-7 male present as a potential sexual partner to women in 2021? Seriously.

Anything the poor guys try gets them labelled a creep, misogynist, potential rapist, loser, or banished forever to the friendzone. Modern women’s “standards” for dating are now so shallow, so narrow minded, so demanding of a man’s time, effort and resources, I’m honestly surprised these guys bother to shoot their shots at all.

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AtaCome7821 · 2021-06-29T09:43:41+00:00

I say this very reluctantly but ultimately it may be true, it's the latter.

Aldabruzzo · 2021-06-29T13:30:27+00:00

The only places men really develop "body image" issues are face and penis. Men aren't really that self conscious of their bodies.

S0mnariumx · 2021-06-29T14:37:19+00:00

I don't know I've been rejected a lot but don't have poor body image. I'm perfectly fine with being thin and I don't let myself get fat. My rejections often came down to poor timing and autism. It's often nothing personal and it's important to learn that at a young age.

EfficientComputer5 · 2021-06-29T21:16:03+00:00

It seems to be that men that fail to attract women lose the incentive to be sexy. Incentive drives many things, it sets the precedence as to when or why men choose to look attractive. Looking terribly is a negative feedback loop where being ugly makes you less attractive and being less attractive makes you more ugly.

I would suggest that men at large will learn how to outmanevuer female expectations and will naturally adopt appropriate prettiness and dress styles. The outcasts will simply be those who have become a part of the broken system of socialization and will be ignorant of cultural advances.

Komaric_ · 2021-06-30T00:41:21+00:00

Not really. I’ve been on both sides and I actually feel like it was easier when I was highly insecure (mainly due to lower standards and anxiety causing attachment). Now that I have confidence and a high self image, I have standards and don’t fall with the slightest bit of attention. Still a virgin though so who knows

_Neon_Shadow_ · 2021-07-01T06:37:32+00:00

I agree with the first part because that was me, but I would never simp for a woman. I simply stopped pursuing relationships.

accrescent · 2021-07-05T02:02:24+00:00

Personally, I've been obese my entire life with the exception of early childhood & a crisis during my long post-recession under/unemployment when I stopped eating at all then eventually ate well below maintenance for maybe a year. I have always been ashamed of my body. I believe a lot of it has to do with growing up with a mother who was extremely vocal in her self-loathing. My younger sister had an eating disorder.

I've been throwing myself into the most awkward Meetups, which still tend to be too young/old & male dominated, and gardening clubs, which are sizeable but 99% seniors. I dress very well (country-club style and well fitted) but I never, never get compliments. I was once sexually harassed at work (federal customer service) but by a large mannish horse, no Black Beauty, so not boost at all from someone no coworker could stomach. Alternately I get "not (that) fat" and "good looking" from friends but then others will address me as "big guy". (I'm 5'10", 215 (same as college) with a more formidable "strong climber' lower body.)

I'm starting (off-label because my fucking insurance says obesity isn't a health issue) GLP-1 therapy, in addition to my existing stimulant appetite suppressant & truly exceptional hiking activities. I am confident this is the key I have been missing in a repeated chain of failed diets. But this will take time. I'm 38 1/3 yo, and very few pre-wall women make that jump. I'm still trying but my body type is still very much holding me back.

Xx_SwordWords_xX · 2021-06-29T06:14:13+00:00

My first sexual partner was a 15 year old boy, who was skinny, full face of acne and greasy hair. To this day, he was still one of the best, most confident lovers I've ever had.

rivetcitymayor · 2021-06-29T07:48:46+00:00

I don’t think so, I know a lot of fat guys and although they wish they were better in shape, I wouldn’t say they have “ low body image”

Title	Does body image play a part in men's sexual failure?
Author	SuitableStart
Upvotes	3
Comments	40
Date	June 29, 2021 6:00 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/oa29s1/does_body_image_play_a_part_in_mens_sexual_failure/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/does-body-image-play-a-part-in-mens-sexual-failure.787863 https://theredarchive.com/post/787863

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